Missing You - July 2008
Chapter Fifty
Buffy and Dawn had spent months bridging the communications gaps. They had mutually decided that it would be best that they simply didn't talk about Spike, there was just too much hurt there. And the subject of the former vampire usually either started a fight or made them burst into tears. Dawn didn't have the guts to tell Buffy about the letter, she just wasn't ready. Besides, Buffy had made it pretty clear to her that she didn't want anything to do with Spike, ever again.
Buffy's anger toward Spike and Dawn simmered a little with each passing day. She was angry, but she was beginning to think outside of the box, as one of her college professors had once said during a lecture. She could understand why Dawn had gone to Spike, she knew that Dawn had been in love with the then vampire since she was eleven years old. He possessed danger, and Spike was sex in it's purest form. Buffy could just never quite figure out why Spike had dated Dawn, the entire thing had ended with Dawn on her front door steps crying. Buffy knew that Spike was one of those in it for the long haul kind of guys. He knew there was nothing there to save, and she guessed he had known for a long time. Buffy knew it wasn't out of spite, Spike would never intentionally hurt Dawn. Sometimes Buffy wondered if he still thought about her, but pushed the thought out of her head.
Dawn was no longer angry at Spike, in fact she missed him. He was her best friend after all. She felt that enough time had passed for it not to be awkward between them. Well, she knew that things were going to be a little weird for awhile. He had seen her naked, they had shared a bed. She just knew that there wouldn't be any playful flirting or slumber parties for awhile. She had even started dating a doctor at the hospital. She wasn't sure how she really felt about him, because Spike had consumed a majority of her thoughts over the last decade or so. They had fun though, and doctor equaled financial independence. Dawn talked to Buffy about seeing Spike, and to her surprise Buffy seemed to think it was a good idea.
One afternoon, Dawn made her way up to LA for the first time in months. She was anxious and nervous all at the same time.
*********************
Spike heard the doorbell ring. He had just gotten out of the shower and was in the middle of shaving, a ritual he was thankful that he only had to do once a week or so. He figured it was probably just Angel or Wesley so he walked to the door with a towel loosely hanging around his hips. He sorely wished he has put some clothes on when he answered the door to find Dawn staring at him.
"Hi bit." Spike said, clearly embarrassed.
"Glad to see you get dressed up for company." Dawn said jokingly before inviting herself in.
"Well, make yourself at home, I'll just go throw some clothes on."
Dawn nodded and got something to drink out of the fridge while Spike went to find some clothes to wear.
"Figures the first time we see each other in over seven months and I'm half naked." Spike said, sitting down next to Dawn at what used to be their table.
"No biggie, not like it anything I haven't seen before. Besides, if I remember correctly, you saw much more of me." Dawn said, rolling her eyes.
They then both slightly blushed. There was still a little bit of sexual tension floating between them, and it wasn't the comfortably buzzing kind either. They weren't sure if it was OK to touch one another, they didn't know what it was safe to talk about. They finally met one another's eyes. Dawn leapt out of her chair and threw hers arms around her former lover.
"I missed you so much." Dawn exclaimed.
"Missed you too nibblit." Spike said, returning the embrace.
Dawn then became embarrassed again and sat in her chair once more.
"Any ideas how long this is going to feel weird?" Dawn asked.
"Not a clue. Usually my ex's always wanted to dust me, not still want to be friends with me." Spike replied honestly.
"Ha Ha funny guy. I mean we were best friends for like ever. We can't just stop now because we lived together and made out a few dozen times." Dawn said jokingly.
Spike chuckled at how easy Dawn was taking all of this. He was still nervous as hell around her, but the butterflies began to melt with each passing second. The two caught up over the next four hours, while eating a pan of brownies and a large pizza. They hadn't really realized how much they had missed one another until that moment.
"So are we OK?" Spike finally asked Dawn.
"Definitely. I care about you too much for things to not be OK." Dawn replied honestly.
Spike reached over and ruffled the young woman's hair. Dawn gave him an annoyed look, the same look that Buffy used to give him when he did that to her. Dawn could sense the hurt look on Spike's face and knew exactly who he was thinking about.
"You're thinking about Buffy aren't you?" Dawn asked.
"I don't think I should be talking to my ex about another woman." Spike said truthfully.
"Really, it's OK. I knew you were still in love with her the entire time we were together. You can talk about her."
"She ever ask about me?" Spike asked Dawn.
"Honestly, no. I think it hurts her too much. She doesn't talk about you to anyone. You ask her flat out about you and she changes the subject with out even giving you the courtesy of an 'it's none of your business.' I think she misses you, but she won't tell me. She thinks it's not fair to me to whine about you." Dawn said truthfully.
"Why doesn't she just call me then?"
"I don't think she wants to be rejected."
"Why would she feel like that? She's the one that always rejected me." Spike said thoughtfully.
"I dunno." Dawn quickly lied.
Dawn looked at the clock, it was almost midnight and she had to drive back. She had an eleven o'clock class the next day and she didn't want to explain the letter she failed to deliver. She knew she was being spineless, but she didn't know how to fess up to her sister without being killed in the process. The two exchanged hugs and promised to call one another. Dawn then left.
Spike the went to bed to go to sleep. He slept through the entire night for the first time in over seven months.
Buffy and Dawn had spent months bridging the communications gaps. They had mutually decided that it would be best that they simply didn't talk about Spike, there was just too much hurt there. And the subject of the former vampire usually either started a fight or made them burst into tears. Dawn didn't have the guts to tell Buffy about the letter, she just wasn't ready. Besides, Buffy had made it pretty clear to her that she didn't want anything to do with Spike, ever again.
Buffy's anger toward Spike and Dawn simmered a little with each passing day. She was angry, but she was beginning to think outside of the box, as one of her college professors had once said during a lecture. She could understand why Dawn had gone to Spike, she knew that Dawn had been in love with the then vampire since she was eleven years old. He possessed danger, and Spike was sex in it's purest form. Buffy could just never quite figure out why Spike had dated Dawn, the entire thing had ended with Dawn on her front door steps crying. Buffy knew that Spike was one of those in it for the long haul kind of guys. He knew there was nothing there to save, and she guessed he had known for a long time. Buffy knew it wasn't out of spite, Spike would never intentionally hurt Dawn. Sometimes Buffy wondered if he still thought about her, but pushed the thought out of her head.
Dawn was no longer angry at Spike, in fact she missed him. He was her best friend after all. She felt that enough time had passed for it not to be awkward between them. Well, she knew that things were going to be a little weird for awhile. He had seen her naked, they had shared a bed. She just knew that there wouldn't be any playful flirting or slumber parties for awhile. She had even started dating a doctor at the hospital. She wasn't sure how she really felt about him, because Spike had consumed a majority of her thoughts over the last decade or so. They had fun though, and doctor equaled financial independence. Dawn talked to Buffy about seeing Spike, and to her surprise Buffy seemed to think it was a good idea.
One afternoon, Dawn made her way up to LA for the first time in months. She was anxious and nervous all at the same time.
*********************
Spike heard the doorbell ring. He had just gotten out of the shower and was in the middle of shaving, a ritual he was thankful that he only had to do once a week or so. He figured it was probably just Angel or Wesley so he walked to the door with a towel loosely hanging around his hips. He sorely wished he has put some clothes on when he answered the door to find Dawn staring at him.
"Hi bit." Spike said, clearly embarrassed.
"Glad to see you get dressed up for company." Dawn said jokingly before inviting herself in.
"Well, make yourself at home, I'll just go throw some clothes on."
Dawn nodded and got something to drink out of the fridge while Spike went to find some clothes to wear.
"Figures the first time we see each other in over seven months and I'm half naked." Spike said, sitting down next to Dawn at what used to be their table.
"No biggie, not like it anything I haven't seen before. Besides, if I remember correctly, you saw much more of me." Dawn said, rolling her eyes.
They then both slightly blushed. There was still a little bit of sexual tension floating between them, and it wasn't the comfortably buzzing kind either. They weren't sure if it was OK to touch one another, they didn't know what it was safe to talk about. They finally met one another's eyes. Dawn leapt out of her chair and threw hers arms around her former lover.
"I missed you so much." Dawn exclaimed.
"Missed you too nibblit." Spike said, returning the embrace.
Dawn then became embarrassed again and sat in her chair once more.
"Any ideas how long this is going to feel weird?" Dawn asked.
"Not a clue. Usually my ex's always wanted to dust me, not still want to be friends with me." Spike replied honestly.
"Ha Ha funny guy. I mean we were best friends for like ever. We can't just stop now because we lived together and made out a few dozen times." Dawn said jokingly.
Spike chuckled at how easy Dawn was taking all of this. He was still nervous as hell around her, but the butterflies began to melt with each passing second. The two caught up over the next four hours, while eating a pan of brownies and a large pizza. They hadn't really realized how much they had missed one another until that moment.
"So are we OK?" Spike finally asked Dawn.
"Definitely. I care about you too much for things to not be OK." Dawn replied honestly.
Spike reached over and ruffled the young woman's hair. Dawn gave him an annoyed look, the same look that Buffy used to give him when he did that to her. Dawn could sense the hurt look on Spike's face and knew exactly who he was thinking about.
"You're thinking about Buffy aren't you?" Dawn asked.
"I don't think I should be talking to my ex about another woman." Spike said truthfully.
"Really, it's OK. I knew you were still in love with her the entire time we were together. You can talk about her."
"She ever ask about me?" Spike asked Dawn.
"Honestly, no. I think it hurts her too much. She doesn't talk about you to anyone. You ask her flat out about you and she changes the subject with out even giving you the courtesy of an 'it's none of your business.' I think she misses you, but she won't tell me. She thinks it's not fair to me to whine about you." Dawn said truthfully.
"Why doesn't she just call me then?"
"I don't think she wants to be rejected."
"Why would she feel like that? She's the one that always rejected me." Spike said thoughtfully.
"I dunno." Dawn quickly lied.
Dawn looked at the clock, it was almost midnight and she had to drive back. She had an eleven o'clock class the next day and she didn't want to explain the letter she failed to deliver. She knew she was being spineless, but she didn't know how to fess up to her sister without being killed in the process. The two exchanged hugs and promised to call one another. Dawn then left.
Spike the went to bed to go to sleep. He slept through the entire night for the first time in over seven months.