Disclaimer: Look back at the other two chapters. If they belong to someone
else they are obviously not mine.
Huzzah! I got reviewed! Okay so it was only one, but hey! One is more than 0...so to my 1 reviewer:
xXHaldirsWhore_69Xx: Thanks, I was hoping someone would enjoy my rather boring sense of humour. I'll try to get more drunkeness in, but it will have to be in another story as this one is prewritten, I'm just uploading chapters---putting on the replies before I do so. And the pillows.hehe.it's an addiction. That and I don't want to cut up my muses.
CH III: 0400-0429
"Okay," Sylvan said, settling back down in her desk chair. Haldir flopped on Sylvan's bed, and Drizzt was laying completely flat on his bed suffering a hangover. "On with chapter fourteen." She loaded a study guide from the disc and handed the laptop to Haldir.
"What is the cube root of pi?"
"Hal-diiiiiiiruh!" Sylvan whined. The noise made Drizzt's head throb even more and he moaned. Which resulted in Haldir (surprisingly) throwing the pillow that impacted with Drizzt's face.
"Fine, fine, fine. Okay. Question one: in what era did Homo sapiens appear?"
"The Arachnophobic Era?" Drizzt said, managing to roll over.
"I wasn't talking to you," Haldir growled (moody, huh?), the pillow suddenly reappearing in his hand to be thrown, yet again, at the poor Drow. "Besides, even one of diminutive mental prowess, such as yourself, should know the answer to that question."
"Arachnophobia (fear of spiders)? Isn't that the fear of cats (ailurophobia)?" Sylvan asked.
"No, that's agoraphobia (fear of open spaces)," Haldir said.
"No, agoraphobia is the fear of garlic (alliumphobia)," Drizzt said.
"That's aulophobia (fear of flutes)," Sylvan said.
"But I thought aulophobia was the fear of bathing (ablutophobia)?" Haldir asked.
"No, because the fear of bathing is alectorophobia (fear of chickens)," Sylvan countered.
"Wrong again. Alectorophobia is the fear of numbers (arithmophobia)," Drizzt said with a smile.
"That can't be right," Haldir said. "Because the fear of numbers is androphobia (fear of men). But speaking of numbers, what number is this?"
"Nine I think," Sylvan wondered aloud.
"You wish!" Drizzt said, ignoring Haldir's question and Sylvan's answer. "Androphobia is the fear of crossing the street (agyrophobia)."
"But that's arachibutyrophobia!" Sylvan exclaimed, and Haldir cracked up.
"Sylvan you're an airhead! That's the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth!" the blonde Elf said. Sylvan grabbed her laptop, hooking it up to the Internet. She looked it up at Time.com's "Phobias from A to Z".
"Well glue on a beard and call me a dwarf!" she exclaimed. "The good Marchwarden is right! It is the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth!" Haldir smiled smugly, receiving a blow on the head with a pillow from Drizzt. However, getting up far enough to actually hit Haldir had given him one helluva headache so he plopped back down on the bed with a groan.
"I would really rather not," Haldir said. "Besides, how did we get from the Cenozoic Era to arachibutyrophobia?"
"Talking about arachnophobia being the fear of toads (bufonophobia) or something," Drizzt said.
"But I thought that the fear of toads was ballistophobia (fear of missiles and/or bullets)," Haldir remarked.
"Oh, Allfather.here we go again!" Sylvan groaned.
"What?" both Elves said concurrently (all at the same time, too!).
"Arguing about phobias. Really, I have to study. Please, just give me one more hour," Sylvan pleaded.
"Okay. Let's take this from the top," Haldir said. "Question two: what was the era in which dinosaurs appeared and reptiles were the dominant land animal?"
"The Myxophobic Era?" Sylvan asked.
"Allfather." Drizzt whimpered, knowing that the mass confusion (I am so big on that, aren't I? Now.what was I saying? Oh yes.mass confusion) was about to start again.
"Mesozoic Era you silly round-eared, short-lived female. Hey, does anyone know what myxophobia (the fear of slime) is anyways?" Haldir asked, thwapping the aforementioned round-ears nonchalantly.
"The fear of stepmothers (novercaphobia) if I'm not too mistaken," Drizzt said, deciding to forget his worries about mass confusion.
"But I thought the fear of stepmothers was opthalmophobia (fear of being stared at)?" Haldir said.
"No, because opthalmophobia is the fear of," she started to giggle. "We're doing it again!"
"Well you started it," Haldir said, whiningly.
"Oh I did not," Sylvan said.
"Did to," Haldir said.
"Don't you mean 'did too'?" Drizzt asked.
"What? What did I say?" Haldir asked.
"Did to," Sylvan said.
"Oh. You're right, Drizzt. I meant 'did too'," Haldir said.
"Did not!" Drizzt countered.
"Children!" Sylvan shouted. "I am a mortal. I am just 14. Drizzt, you are the youngest of the two Elves in the room and you are still a good four. five hundred years older than I am. Would someone care to explain to me why I am being the mature one at the moment?"
There was no answer from either Elf.
"I thought so. Now, can we please get back to studying?"
"Yes, Sylvan," the males said.
With that they went back to studying, actually getting to Chapter 20 without anymore problems, aside from the occasional insult.
"Spider-kisser," Haldir muttered at Drizzt.
"Sunface," Drizzt shot back, a little too loudly.
"Boys." Sylvan said, assuming a menacing tone. Both elves looked up innocently, receiving a glare from Sylvan.
"Yes, Sylvan."
I had the most fun with that. Once again, this story is pre-written. Geesh, I hate being redundant. Anyways.questions? Comments? Rude remarks? Hopes, dreams, desires? You know what to do!
Huzzah! I got reviewed! Okay so it was only one, but hey! One is more than 0...so to my 1 reviewer:
xXHaldirsWhore_69Xx: Thanks, I was hoping someone would enjoy my rather boring sense of humour. I'll try to get more drunkeness in, but it will have to be in another story as this one is prewritten, I'm just uploading chapters---putting on the replies before I do so. And the pillows.hehe.it's an addiction. That and I don't want to cut up my muses.
CH III: 0400-0429
"Okay," Sylvan said, settling back down in her desk chair. Haldir flopped on Sylvan's bed, and Drizzt was laying completely flat on his bed suffering a hangover. "On with chapter fourteen." She loaded a study guide from the disc and handed the laptop to Haldir.
"What is the cube root of pi?"
"Hal-diiiiiiiruh!" Sylvan whined. The noise made Drizzt's head throb even more and he moaned. Which resulted in Haldir (surprisingly) throwing the pillow that impacted with Drizzt's face.
"Fine, fine, fine. Okay. Question one: in what era did Homo sapiens appear?"
"The Arachnophobic Era?" Drizzt said, managing to roll over.
"I wasn't talking to you," Haldir growled (moody, huh?), the pillow suddenly reappearing in his hand to be thrown, yet again, at the poor Drow. "Besides, even one of diminutive mental prowess, such as yourself, should know the answer to that question."
"Arachnophobia (fear of spiders)? Isn't that the fear of cats (ailurophobia)?" Sylvan asked.
"No, that's agoraphobia (fear of open spaces)," Haldir said.
"No, agoraphobia is the fear of garlic (alliumphobia)," Drizzt said.
"That's aulophobia (fear of flutes)," Sylvan said.
"But I thought aulophobia was the fear of bathing (ablutophobia)?" Haldir asked.
"No, because the fear of bathing is alectorophobia (fear of chickens)," Sylvan countered.
"Wrong again. Alectorophobia is the fear of numbers (arithmophobia)," Drizzt said with a smile.
"That can't be right," Haldir said. "Because the fear of numbers is androphobia (fear of men). But speaking of numbers, what number is this?"
"Nine I think," Sylvan wondered aloud.
"You wish!" Drizzt said, ignoring Haldir's question and Sylvan's answer. "Androphobia is the fear of crossing the street (agyrophobia)."
"But that's arachibutyrophobia!" Sylvan exclaimed, and Haldir cracked up.
"Sylvan you're an airhead! That's the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth!" the blonde Elf said. Sylvan grabbed her laptop, hooking it up to the Internet. She looked it up at Time.com's "Phobias from A to Z".
"Well glue on a beard and call me a dwarf!" she exclaimed. "The good Marchwarden is right! It is the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth!" Haldir smiled smugly, receiving a blow on the head with a pillow from Drizzt. However, getting up far enough to actually hit Haldir had given him one helluva headache so he plopped back down on the bed with a groan.
"I would really rather not," Haldir said. "Besides, how did we get from the Cenozoic Era to arachibutyrophobia?"
"Talking about arachnophobia being the fear of toads (bufonophobia) or something," Drizzt said.
"But I thought that the fear of toads was ballistophobia (fear of missiles and/or bullets)," Haldir remarked.
"Oh, Allfather.here we go again!" Sylvan groaned.
"What?" both Elves said concurrently (all at the same time, too!).
"Arguing about phobias. Really, I have to study. Please, just give me one more hour," Sylvan pleaded.
"Okay. Let's take this from the top," Haldir said. "Question two: what was the era in which dinosaurs appeared and reptiles were the dominant land animal?"
"The Myxophobic Era?" Sylvan asked.
"Allfather." Drizzt whimpered, knowing that the mass confusion (I am so big on that, aren't I? Now.what was I saying? Oh yes.mass confusion) was about to start again.
"Mesozoic Era you silly round-eared, short-lived female. Hey, does anyone know what myxophobia (the fear of slime) is anyways?" Haldir asked, thwapping the aforementioned round-ears nonchalantly.
"The fear of stepmothers (novercaphobia) if I'm not too mistaken," Drizzt said, deciding to forget his worries about mass confusion.
"But I thought the fear of stepmothers was opthalmophobia (fear of being stared at)?" Haldir said.
"No, because opthalmophobia is the fear of," she started to giggle. "We're doing it again!"
"Well you started it," Haldir said, whiningly.
"Oh I did not," Sylvan said.
"Did to," Haldir said.
"Don't you mean 'did too'?" Drizzt asked.
"What? What did I say?" Haldir asked.
"Did to," Sylvan said.
"Oh. You're right, Drizzt. I meant 'did too'," Haldir said.
"Did not!" Drizzt countered.
"Children!" Sylvan shouted. "I am a mortal. I am just 14. Drizzt, you are the youngest of the two Elves in the room and you are still a good four. five hundred years older than I am. Would someone care to explain to me why I am being the mature one at the moment?"
There was no answer from either Elf.
"I thought so. Now, can we please get back to studying?"
"Yes, Sylvan," the males said.
With that they went back to studying, actually getting to Chapter 20 without anymore problems, aside from the occasional insult.
"Spider-kisser," Haldir muttered at Drizzt.
"Sunface," Drizzt shot back, a little too loudly.
"Boys." Sylvan said, assuming a menacing tone. Both elves looked up innocently, receiving a glare from Sylvan.
"Yes, Sylvan."
I had the most fun with that. Once again, this story is pre-written. Geesh, I hate being redundant. Anyways.questions? Comments? Rude remarks? Hopes, dreams, desires? You know what to do!