The Gathering
The Dark Crystals
Disclaimer: I own none of these character. They all belong to TSR.
Author Notes: I like to thank everyone that reviewed. That is what keeps this fic going!
Episode 3
Narrator: Due to technical difficulties we were unable to broadcast the rest of Episode 2 and were forced to leave our heroes once again. This problem has been fixed and Episode 3 will now play…
~ Caramon and Raistlin are sitting in the High Tower of Sorcery, over looking Shoikan Grove
Caramon: What are we going to do tonight Raist?
Raistlin: Same thing we do every night Caramon, try to become a God!
Chorus: They're Caramon, They're Caramon and Raist, Raist, Rai-
Sorry, wrong program!
"Is this thing on?" Kitiara tapped the camera.
"Yep! Raistlin fixed it" Tas smiled.
"Uncle, that was fascinating! Truly remarkable!" Palin bowed down and started to worship the mighty Raistlin.
"Our son has been brainwashed by your brother" Tika whispered to her husband.
"Caramon, tea, now!"
"Sure thing Raist!" Caramon rushed off to fetch tea for his brother.
"What have I done to deserve this?" Tika promptly smacked her forehead.
"It had digital cable, a VHS, and DVD system" Sturm still crying about the destruction of his flat screen TV.
"HEY! Let's get down to business here!"
"Where's Riverwind?" asked Tanis ignoring Kit.
"He's been sleeping on the couch the whole time" Goldmoon pointed to the Plainsman.
"Lucky b*stard" mumbled Flint.
"I say we start a revolution to free our selves of this tyranny and oppression!! WHO IS WITH ME?!!!" Laurana shouted, stand on a chair, trying to rally the troops.
" Laurana, honey, please sit down" the half-elf pleaded with his wife.
"So how long do you think we'll be stuck in here?" Tas was getting bored. (the horror)
Camera moves to Steel and Dalamar playing the card game 'WAR'.
"W-A-R, WAR!!!" they both yelled flippin their cards over.
"I lost! Curses you damn elf! And you now have two of my aces!"
"Surprisingly, you had all four aces" Dalamar glared at Steel collecting his cards.
"I'm not my mother. I don't cheat" Steel growled.
"Watch your mouth kid. I brought you into this world and I can take you out" Kitiara smacked her son upside the head. "And after all I have done for you?!"
"Only stating the truth mother , to what you really are! You're the whore and he's the wimp!" Steel waved his hand in Sturm's direction.
"Wow, Sturm's a pimp?" Tas had now found something interesting. (the horror)
"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE THE WOMAN MUST DIE!!" Sturm snarled out. All of a sudden a two handed sword appeared in his hands. "KITIARA!!! PREPARE TO DIE!!!" Sturm ran after the curly haired woman.
"Have you gone insane?!!" Kit said trying to calm the knight down, putting a table in between them. "Put the sword down!! Somebody could get seriously hurt"
"THAT'S THE POINT!!" Sturm hacked the table that Kit was using for cover.
"That's my dad…" Steel wiped the tears that were forming in the corners of his eyes. He was very proud of his father at the moment.
"What am I doing running away from you? I have a sword of my own!!"
"Now you don't" Laurana plucked the swords from Kit's grasp. "I have it!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHOHOHOHOHOHHOHO"
"That was scarier than Raistlin's laugh" Flint shook his head.
"SILENCE! Tanis ,my hubby, meet me in the corner" Laurana winked to the half-elf.
"He shoots and he scores!!!" Tanis preceded to make out with Laurana in the corner of the room.
"STEEL HELP ME!!!" Kitiara screams still having the mad crazed Sturm chasing after her around the room.
"Sorry. I'm trying to avenge your death" Steel stared at his opponent evenly.
"You shall lose dark knight" Dalamar sneered. "Beat a full house, you fool!"
"Shit, I lost again" Steel sighed revealing he only had a pair of twos. (playing poker now)
"Now is the perfect time dear nephew!! COME, WE LEAVE THIS ROOM AND TRAVEL TO WHERE THE QUEEN OF DARKNESS IS! OUR TIME IS AT HAND NEPHEW! WE SHALL BECOME GODS!" Raistlin opened a portal to god knows where. "And Caramon, bring me my tea!" Raist, Palin, and Caramon holding a cup of tea jumped into the portal. Tas followed unsuspectingly.
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Paladine was sipping on a glass of champagne watching his sister and wife, still fighting. When suddenly Raistlin Majere made his appearance. "Takhisis!! I have come to face you once again!!!" the mage announced.
The Queen of Darkness paid him no heed as she got fruit off the banquet table and started to shove it in Mishakal's face. "You like that, huh?!"
Raistlin blinked a couple of times, not use to being ignored. "Did anyone hear me?"
"What did you say?" Caramon asked.
"Forget it. We'll wait till the catfight is over" Raistlin huffed settling himself into one of the comfortable chairs. Palin and Caramon did the same.
"FIZBAN!!" Tas shouted running up to Paladine.
The god just smiled seeing the kender and then said, "Are you ready to rock this joint!"
"Yes!" So Paladine and Tas started doing the Electric Slide.
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Back in the Room
"Check mate" Dalamar smiled wickedly beating Steel once again at chess.
"This really sucks!! Your cheating you foul…elf!!" Steel stomped his foot onto the ground acting very childish.
"Sturm I'm getting tired. Please put down the sword!" Kitiara said out of breath.
"You had this coming for a long while!! I could have married a beautiful elf maiden!!!"
"Zzzz" Riverwind, still asleep.
"Where has that blasted kender gone to this time?" Flint scratched his beard.
Tanis and Laurana are still making out in the corner.
Tika and Goldmoon conjured up another television and started to watch Saturday Night Live.
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"Nuitari, you can't perform any spells in your condition!!" Lunitari scolded her cousin.
"Yeah, *hiccup* ya can't"
"And you too Solinari!!!" Lunitari shook her head.
"I'm finey, I ain't high on nothin" Nuitari falls right down on his face.
"Heheheheheheh" Solinari had started to crack up.
"Shut up!" Nuitari got up from the floor. "I'll show you" He started to whisper magical incantations and when the spell was over, it seemed as though nothing had happened.
"I love you Cawamon" a small child like voice called out.
Hugging Caramon's side was a chibi Raist.
Narrator: The powerful Raistlin Majere has been turned into a chibi. How will they get him back to normal? Will Steel ever win one game against Dalamar? And will Paladine and Tas ever stop the Electric Slide? Find out in the next episode of THE GATHERING!!