CHAPTER 3
Catherine and Greg had past out not long ago and Jim had carried Catherine into Nick's room. He was going to return to the group when Catherine asked him to stay. He soon fell asleep holding her.
Greg was sprawled across the floor between the couch and coffee table. Nick was in his armchair with his feet hanging over the edge talking to Grissom while Warrick was past out on the couch.
Both were sounding drunk and even looked drunk at this point and were talking about nonsense. Grissom laughed at Nick's pronunciation of his words and figured he'd give him ten minutes before he joined the others in the land of the nod.
"You. you should had stayed. Grissom." Nick slurred.
Grissom watched him with amusement. "Where?"
"College." Nick's head bobbed up and down as he smiled. "She missed you. loads ya know." Furrowing his brows with confusion Grissom sat forward. Nick scoffed. "That's right. play stupid." Grissom realised what he was talking about and stood. "Why don't. Why don't you tell her she's not. wanted here huh?" Grissom scowled at him. "It's obvious."
Grissom walked over to Nick and removed his beer from his dropping hand and the minute he did, Nick was out like a light. Grissom stood in the kitchen and spotted the Jack Daniel's. He poured himself a tall glass and downed it. His nerves felt like they ready to explode. If the others remembered more, it was going to be hell. He was trying his best to stay calm around her, but when he smells that shampoo she uses, the perfume she still wears, her hair still loose around her shoulders and her thin frame teasing him to be held. He poured himself another drink and leaned back against the fridge as he finished the glass.
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Before anyone knew it, it was daylight and the rule had taken its effect. Everyone had hangovers. Although neither moved because of the throbbing they heard from every minuscule sound. Grissom buried his head under his pillow and stretched out his arm over the bed. His hand touched something soft and warm. Pulling his head from under the pillow and squinting against the bright light, he snatched his hand away from the body lying next to him. Sara Sidle was asleep in the same bed as him. He pushed himself away and checked himself. He was wearing his boxers and his shirt. He looked across at Sara and saw she was wearing a thin top that was almost see- through and a pair of Nick's sweats. He steadied his breathing and tried to remember last night. His head was foggy with alcohol that still plagued his system. Raising himself up on his elbow, he took in the sight of her. She was still as beautiful as ever. He reached out and pushed some errant strands from her cheek. "Why are you so beautiful?" He whispered into the quiet room.
Sara stirred and stretched out her slim frame. Grissom watched as she spread out more and rolled towards him. She opened her eyes and had to blink a few times to focus on the blur that she could see. Narrowing her eyes, she moved back to the edge of the bed. "Erm. Hi." She sat up and swung her legs over the side so her back was to him. Grissom didn't say anything, he only watched her as she stood, grabbed her clothes and wondered into the bathroom without a word.
Grissom was confused. He couldn't remember anything apart from drinking a full bottle of Jack Daniel's and finding a bed in Nick's spare room. He didn't hear anyone come into the room or get into the bed for that matter. Nothing happened, so what was she so jittery about? It's not like they hadn't shared a bed before. Grissom chastised himself for the thought. He's married and she knows that. Sara's one of the most loyal people he's ever been privileged to know. About ten minutes later, Grissom got out of bed and dressed after realising she wasn't coming back. Walking into the living room, Nick was cooking as he clutched his head and nose simultaneously.
"She left." Nick said hearing Grissom sit down at the breakfast bar.
"Why?" Grissom asked.
Nick turned and laughed the best he could without scrambling his brain. "You really want me to answer that?"
"Look Nick, I can't do anything now she's here. I can't I'm."
Nick waved the spatula at him in a defensive manner. "Married? Bullshit. We all see it. Joanne has pushed you around since you both met. She's a walking bulldozer."
Grissom glared at him. "Don't talk about her like that. It's not true."
Nick snorted. "Whatever." Grissom looked down at his hands and dropped his shoulders. "She didn't know you were here you know. She was just as shocked. Even more so since it was you that left not her."
Sighing angrily, Grissom stood. "I'm not listening to this Nick. I'll see you at work." Nick watched as Grissom stormed out the front door.
"Where's he going?"
Nick turned and laughed at the coroner. "Al, you sleep out there all night?"
"Seems that way why?" Al sat down on Grissom's stool and grabbed a fork as Nick placed a fry up in front of him.
"You look like a chicken." Nick chuckled.
Al raised an amused eyebrow. "That bad huh? I'll sort the sun burn later." He eyed the plate and grinned. "Food comes first."
"I can't believe you can eat that." Warrick moaned pressing a cushion to his face.
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* * * *
Grissom wondered around the hallways of the lab looking for certain members of the nightshift. Nick said that the last time anyone saw anyone was in autopsy. It was a fascinating case involving the local zoo and a zookeeper that became lion food. They still hadn't determined cause of death other than being cut to ribbons nor had any suspects. Grissom pushed through the doors and stopped in his tracks at the sight of Al holding Sara. She turned away and rubbed her eyes. It was the end of shift and wanted to know if anyone wanted breakfast. Catherine and Nick had plans, Warrick and Jim were still working and he decided to ask Al seeing as he couldn't find Sara. Not that he would ask anyway.
"Hey, um. I was wondering if you wanted to grab something to eat?" Al shook his head and got back to work. He spoke quietly to Sara and she nodded. She walked past Grissom without a word and left. "What's wrong with Sara?"
Al looked at him then down at the body. "Very observant aren't you Gil?"
"What's that supposed to mean?" Grissom asked trying to keep his anger at bay.
Al shrugged. "Nothing. If you don't mind, I've got work to do."
Grissom stared at the coroner before storming out of the room and to his car. He sat with his hands clenching the wheel. His cell phone was ringing and he answered it. "Grissom. oh hey. oh ok. I'll see you later then. oh right, ok. I'll see you when you finish tomorrow, call if you need anything. Yeah me too." Hanging up, he threw his cell in the back and groaned as he rubbed his face angrily.
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CHAPTER 4
Sara unlocked her door and opened it slowly. "Yeah?"
"Can I come in?" He asked calmly.
Sara shook her head. "That wouldn't be a good idea Grissom."
"Sara just let me in." Grissom's tone was a little harsher this time and he sighed. "I'm sorry. Please, I want to talk to you." She looked at him for a few minutes before nodding and opening the door wider for him to pass. He walked in and immediately started to take everything in. "Nice place."
"Thanks. You want something to drink?" She asked walking towards the kitchen.
"No thanks." He said turning to her and watching her retrieve a bottle of water and drink from it. "I'm sorry about the other day."
Sara looked down at the water in her hands and shrugged. "It's fine, nothing happened so don't worry. There's nothing to worry about with the wife, so forget it."
Grissom approached her slowly. "I'm not worried about that."
Her head snapped up. "You should be. You wouldn't want to ruin a perfectly good marriage with one fling Grissom." She narrowed her eyes at him. "Why 'are' you here?"
"I wanted to explain something to you." He leaned against the counter between the kitchen and living room. Initially blocking the way out. "Nick said something to me that morning and I didn't like what he said."
"So, what has it got to do with me?" She knew she was being purposely defensive, but she couldn't help it.
Grissom took a deep breath. "It's true I didn't want you here, I didn't want to work with you, I didn't want to see you. I'm sorry this ever happened between us, it's my fault and I should have never let it get this far."
Sara slammed the bottle down on the side and pushed past him. "I've heard it before Gil, I'm not letting you do that to me again. I said forget it."
Grissom followed her towards the door. "If you remember, then you remember this. I never regretted it, never will. You remember I said that?"
Sara turned to him sharply. "Stop opening old wounds and leave." She pointed to the door and closed her eyes against the onslaught of tears.
His breathing became erratic and his chest began squeezing painfully. "Fine." He pushed past her and stopped when she grasped his hand. He turned his head and closed his eyes against the fragrance of her shampoo and the feel of her hand holding his.
Sara looked up at him. Their faces were so close together. Grissom slowly opened his eyes and locked with hers. A few centimetres and their lips would touch, but Sara dropped his hand and stepped away. "I'm sorry, I can't do this." She walked away and closed her bedroom door quietly.
Grissom angrily clenched his fists and punched her door. "Damn you Sara!" He shouted and slammed the front door after him.
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Months past and tension was building immensely amongst certain members of the nightshift. Neither said anything unless it was work related. Neither went to breakfast with the others and it was becoming a tired charade. Grissom went home one morning to meet his wife pacing their living room with an expression he knew too well. He stood by the door, waiting for her to blow and when she did it was his turn to be blamed that the hospital could never afford to save every life and they always ended up on his table with there name written neatly on a piece of paper. Grissom kept his eyes on the floor and didn't know what was happening until it was too late.
He always tried to help, but there were some things that he was just incapable of doing. He always asked himself this question. 'Why couldn't she see that?' He left the house and found himself in the last place he thought he would find himself since the last time they actually spoke.
He was about to knock on the door when it opened. Sara stared at him and at first anger was all he could see and he turned not wanting to be witness to two angry women in one day.
"No Gil, wait." Grissom stopped but didn't turn. "Are you ok? You're bleeding." Sara carefully pulled him inside and sat him on the couch. He didn't say a word. Sara got the first aid kit and gently tended to the cut on his temple. "How did this happen?" She asked glancing at his eyes before continuing to apply butterfly stitches.
Grissom closed his eyes and took a shallow breath. "My car door hit me." He lied and she almost believed him until she looked into his eyes and saw the real cause.
"I never thought you'd lie to me about something serious Grissom." She said moving away and pouring two cups of coffee.
Grissom dropped his eyes at the change of name all of a sudden. Sara placed one cup into his hand and sat next to him. "It was nothing." He said staring at his coffee.
Sara sighed. "What did she throw?"
Grissom didn't know why but he laughed. Sara couldn't help but smirk at his reaction. "Ashtray."
"You don't smoke." Sara paused and nodded. "She does. Glass or plastic?"
He raised his head and showed her his wife's handy work. "What's it look like?" He asked with no hint of sarcasm.
Sara leaned forward and narrowed her eyes. "Glass." She smiled when he nodded and their eyes locked for a few quiet minutes. Sara sat back and drank her coffee. "Has this happened before?"
Grissom nodded hesitantly and stood. He moved around the room to get a good look at the place. Sara followed him and took his cup and placed it on the bookshelf when he picked up a book. "I didn't think you'd keep this." He said looking on the inside cover. 'From Griss'
"I kept everything you gave me. Did you not want me to?" She asked suddenly worried that he did indeed want her to give them back or throw them away.
He turned sharply. "No!" He said sternly. "It's just." He continued in a quieter voice. "After what happened, I guessed you'd throw me out completely with the trash." He shrugged and turned back to the shelf and saw a picture frame. He picked it up and smiled.
"The lake." She told him and walked away. Grissom watched her retreat to the kitchen and placed the picture back to join her. "What are you going to do?"
Blinking a few times with confusion, he sighed. "You mean about Jo?" Sara nodded. "What is there to do?"
"If this has happened before, then why are you still with her?" Grissom went to say the words she didn't want to hear and she closed her eyes and held up her hands. "Don't please. I don't want to hear them." Grissom felt ashamed at the words he was about to say and felt guilty thinking them. How could he?
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Catherine and Greg had past out not long ago and Jim had carried Catherine into Nick's room. He was going to return to the group when Catherine asked him to stay. He soon fell asleep holding her.
Greg was sprawled across the floor between the couch and coffee table. Nick was in his armchair with his feet hanging over the edge talking to Grissom while Warrick was past out on the couch.
Both were sounding drunk and even looked drunk at this point and were talking about nonsense. Grissom laughed at Nick's pronunciation of his words and figured he'd give him ten minutes before he joined the others in the land of the nod.
"You. you should had stayed. Grissom." Nick slurred.
Grissom watched him with amusement. "Where?"
"College." Nick's head bobbed up and down as he smiled. "She missed you. loads ya know." Furrowing his brows with confusion Grissom sat forward. Nick scoffed. "That's right. play stupid." Grissom realised what he was talking about and stood. "Why don't. Why don't you tell her she's not. wanted here huh?" Grissom scowled at him. "It's obvious."
Grissom walked over to Nick and removed his beer from his dropping hand and the minute he did, Nick was out like a light. Grissom stood in the kitchen and spotted the Jack Daniel's. He poured himself a tall glass and downed it. His nerves felt like they ready to explode. If the others remembered more, it was going to be hell. He was trying his best to stay calm around her, but when he smells that shampoo she uses, the perfume she still wears, her hair still loose around her shoulders and her thin frame teasing him to be held. He poured himself another drink and leaned back against the fridge as he finished the glass.
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* * * *
Before anyone knew it, it was daylight and the rule had taken its effect. Everyone had hangovers. Although neither moved because of the throbbing they heard from every minuscule sound. Grissom buried his head under his pillow and stretched out his arm over the bed. His hand touched something soft and warm. Pulling his head from under the pillow and squinting against the bright light, he snatched his hand away from the body lying next to him. Sara Sidle was asleep in the same bed as him. He pushed himself away and checked himself. He was wearing his boxers and his shirt. He looked across at Sara and saw she was wearing a thin top that was almost see- through and a pair of Nick's sweats. He steadied his breathing and tried to remember last night. His head was foggy with alcohol that still plagued his system. Raising himself up on his elbow, he took in the sight of her. She was still as beautiful as ever. He reached out and pushed some errant strands from her cheek. "Why are you so beautiful?" He whispered into the quiet room.
Sara stirred and stretched out her slim frame. Grissom watched as she spread out more and rolled towards him. She opened her eyes and had to blink a few times to focus on the blur that she could see. Narrowing her eyes, she moved back to the edge of the bed. "Erm. Hi." She sat up and swung her legs over the side so her back was to him. Grissom didn't say anything, he only watched her as she stood, grabbed her clothes and wondered into the bathroom without a word.
Grissom was confused. He couldn't remember anything apart from drinking a full bottle of Jack Daniel's and finding a bed in Nick's spare room. He didn't hear anyone come into the room or get into the bed for that matter. Nothing happened, so what was she so jittery about? It's not like they hadn't shared a bed before. Grissom chastised himself for the thought. He's married and she knows that. Sara's one of the most loyal people he's ever been privileged to know. About ten minutes later, Grissom got out of bed and dressed after realising she wasn't coming back. Walking into the living room, Nick was cooking as he clutched his head and nose simultaneously.
"She left." Nick said hearing Grissom sit down at the breakfast bar.
"Why?" Grissom asked.
Nick turned and laughed the best he could without scrambling his brain. "You really want me to answer that?"
"Look Nick, I can't do anything now she's here. I can't I'm."
Nick waved the spatula at him in a defensive manner. "Married? Bullshit. We all see it. Joanne has pushed you around since you both met. She's a walking bulldozer."
Grissom glared at him. "Don't talk about her like that. It's not true."
Nick snorted. "Whatever." Grissom looked down at his hands and dropped his shoulders. "She didn't know you were here you know. She was just as shocked. Even more so since it was you that left not her."
Sighing angrily, Grissom stood. "I'm not listening to this Nick. I'll see you at work." Nick watched as Grissom stormed out the front door.
"Where's he going?"
Nick turned and laughed at the coroner. "Al, you sleep out there all night?"
"Seems that way why?" Al sat down on Grissom's stool and grabbed a fork as Nick placed a fry up in front of him.
"You look like a chicken." Nick chuckled.
Al raised an amused eyebrow. "That bad huh? I'll sort the sun burn later." He eyed the plate and grinned. "Food comes first."
"I can't believe you can eat that." Warrick moaned pressing a cushion to his face.
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* * * *
Grissom wondered around the hallways of the lab looking for certain members of the nightshift. Nick said that the last time anyone saw anyone was in autopsy. It was a fascinating case involving the local zoo and a zookeeper that became lion food. They still hadn't determined cause of death other than being cut to ribbons nor had any suspects. Grissom pushed through the doors and stopped in his tracks at the sight of Al holding Sara. She turned away and rubbed her eyes. It was the end of shift and wanted to know if anyone wanted breakfast. Catherine and Nick had plans, Warrick and Jim were still working and he decided to ask Al seeing as he couldn't find Sara. Not that he would ask anyway.
"Hey, um. I was wondering if you wanted to grab something to eat?" Al shook his head and got back to work. He spoke quietly to Sara and she nodded. She walked past Grissom without a word and left. "What's wrong with Sara?"
Al looked at him then down at the body. "Very observant aren't you Gil?"
"What's that supposed to mean?" Grissom asked trying to keep his anger at bay.
Al shrugged. "Nothing. If you don't mind, I've got work to do."
Grissom stared at the coroner before storming out of the room and to his car. He sat with his hands clenching the wheel. His cell phone was ringing and he answered it. "Grissom. oh hey. oh ok. I'll see you later then. oh right, ok. I'll see you when you finish tomorrow, call if you need anything. Yeah me too." Hanging up, he threw his cell in the back and groaned as he rubbed his face angrily.
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CHAPTER 4
Sara unlocked her door and opened it slowly. "Yeah?"
"Can I come in?" He asked calmly.
Sara shook her head. "That wouldn't be a good idea Grissom."
"Sara just let me in." Grissom's tone was a little harsher this time and he sighed. "I'm sorry. Please, I want to talk to you." She looked at him for a few minutes before nodding and opening the door wider for him to pass. He walked in and immediately started to take everything in. "Nice place."
"Thanks. You want something to drink?" She asked walking towards the kitchen.
"No thanks." He said turning to her and watching her retrieve a bottle of water and drink from it. "I'm sorry about the other day."
Sara looked down at the water in her hands and shrugged. "It's fine, nothing happened so don't worry. There's nothing to worry about with the wife, so forget it."
Grissom approached her slowly. "I'm not worried about that."
Her head snapped up. "You should be. You wouldn't want to ruin a perfectly good marriage with one fling Grissom." She narrowed her eyes at him. "Why 'are' you here?"
"I wanted to explain something to you." He leaned against the counter between the kitchen and living room. Initially blocking the way out. "Nick said something to me that morning and I didn't like what he said."
"So, what has it got to do with me?" She knew she was being purposely defensive, but she couldn't help it.
Grissom took a deep breath. "It's true I didn't want you here, I didn't want to work with you, I didn't want to see you. I'm sorry this ever happened between us, it's my fault and I should have never let it get this far."
Sara slammed the bottle down on the side and pushed past him. "I've heard it before Gil, I'm not letting you do that to me again. I said forget it."
Grissom followed her towards the door. "If you remember, then you remember this. I never regretted it, never will. You remember I said that?"
Sara turned to him sharply. "Stop opening old wounds and leave." She pointed to the door and closed her eyes against the onslaught of tears.
His breathing became erratic and his chest began squeezing painfully. "Fine." He pushed past her and stopped when she grasped his hand. He turned his head and closed his eyes against the fragrance of her shampoo and the feel of her hand holding his.
Sara looked up at him. Their faces were so close together. Grissom slowly opened his eyes and locked with hers. A few centimetres and their lips would touch, but Sara dropped his hand and stepped away. "I'm sorry, I can't do this." She walked away and closed her bedroom door quietly.
Grissom angrily clenched his fists and punched her door. "Damn you Sara!" He shouted and slammed the front door after him.
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* * * *
Months past and tension was building immensely amongst certain members of the nightshift. Neither said anything unless it was work related. Neither went to breakfast with the others and it was becoming a tired charade. Grissom went home one morning to meet his wife pacing their living room with an expression he knew too well. He stood by the door, waiting for her to blow and when she did it was his turn to be blamed that the hospital could never afford to save every life and they always ended up on his table with there name written neatly on a piece of paper. Grissom kept his eyes on the floor and didn't know what was happening until it was too late.
He always tried to help, but there were some things that he was just incapable of doing. He always asked himself this question. 'Why couldn't she see that?' He left the house and found himself in the last place he thought he would find himself since the last time they actually spoke.
He was about to knock on the door when it opened. Sara stared at him and at first anger was all he could see and he turned not wanting to be witness to two angry women in one day.
"No Gil, wait." Grissom stopped but didn't turn. "Are you ok? You're bleeding." Sara carefully pulled him inside and sat him on the couch. He didn't say a word. Sara got the first aid kit and gently tended to the cut on his temple. "How did this happen?" She asked glancing at his eyes before continuing to apply butterfly stitches.
Grissom closed his eyes and took a shallow breath. "My car door hit me." He lied and she almost believed him until she looked into his eyes and saw the real cause.
"I never thought you'd lie to me about something serious Grissom." She said moving away and pouring two cups of coffee.
Grissom dropped his eyes at the change of name all of a sudden. Sara placed one cup into his hand and sat next to him. "It was nothing." He said staring at his coffee.
Sara sighed. "What did she throw?"
Grissom didn't know why but he laughed. Sara couldn't help but smirk at his reaction. "Ashtray."
"You don't smoke." Sara paused and nodded. "She does. Glass or plastic?"
He raised his head and showed her his wife's handy work. "What's it look like?" He asked with no hint of sarcasm.
Sara leaned forward and narrowed her eyes. "Glass." She smiled when he nodded and their eyes locked for a few quiet minutes. Sara sat back and drank her coffee. "Has this happened before?"
Grissom nodded hesitantly and stood. He moved around the room to get a good look at the place. Sara followed him and took his cup and placed it on the bookshelf when he picked up a book. "I didn't think you'd keep this." He said looking on the inside cover. 'From Griss'
"I kept everything you gave me. Did you not want me to?" She asked suddenly worried that he did indeed want her to give them back or throw them away.
He turned sharply. "No!" He said sternly. "It's just." He continued in a quieter voice. "After what happened, I guessed you'd throw me out completely with the trash." He shrugged and turned back to the shelf and saw a picture frame. He picked it up and smiled.
"The lake." She told him and walked away. Grissom watched her retreat to the kitchen and placed the picture back to join her. "What are you going to do?"
Blinking a few times with confusion, he sighed. "You mean about Jo?" Sara nodded. "What is there to do?"
"If this has happened before, then why are you still with her?" Grissom went to say the words she didn't want to hear and she closed her eyes and held up her hands. "Don't please. I don't want to hear them." Grissom felt ashamed at the words he was about to say and felt guilty thinking them. How could he?
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