outside of the chinese zodiac
________________________
Prelude // Japanese Language Used Within
Tencho-san - Boss
Onee-chan - Sister
Ojii-san - Grandfather
Okaa-san - Mother
________________________
Session 10 - Ritsu - Apologies
"I'm sorry about that! Really I am!" I bowed deeply to the store manager after dropping a carton of eggs in the grocery store. I hadn't meant to, I was just carrying quite a few things in my shopping basket, but there wasn't enough room so I had carried it under my arm as I headed to the checkout. The eggs crashed to the floor, creating a sticky, gummy mess on the floor. "I'll understand if I'll be banned from this store for a year for my mistake. I'm so sorry!" I sobbed in my feminine sounding voice, deeply regretting going to the store on my own. Mother said she would have gone with me, but I wanted to prove myself, so I told her to stay home. And I caused a mess. "I didn't mean it!"
"It's not his fault, I apologize for our son's actions! Please forgive us for his behaviour!"
"It's alright ma'am, really. One of our janitors can clean this up right away, don't worry, it's not a problem." The manager looked at me as a I caused a scene with my excessive apologies. "Ahem. Ma'am?"
I noticed that several customers were staring at me. I suddenly felt self-conscious, and I froze. "I am very sorry...." I said meekly, looking at the floor.
"Here, why don't you come and check out your groceries right now. We'll get you another dozen eggs, and I'll let you have it at half price, hm?" He led me to an empty cash register and checked out the goods. He led me to the door and I headed out to my car.
I had let Mother down again. Even in the clothes of a woman, I can't do it right. I'm a failure. I'm so sorry....
Session 11 - Kazuma - Father Figure
My son, I've put my son through so much all while trying to make amends for how I treated Grandfather. I have to take care of him, for Grandfather's sake. How I treated him wrongly. The small feisty child, so torn inside; it was, and still is, my duty.
That's what I always told myself, but I know that it is more than that. As we grew older together, he began to smile at me. He became a part of my existence, and his needs outweighed mine by a large margin. I was more than a teacher, I was a father. I hope that he will still see me that way after tonight.
This is the worst thing that I have other forced myself to do. The expression that the girl made when she saw his true form... it was heartbreaking.
The chances are smaller, I can sense her fear. His life may be ruined, but there is still hope.
She slowly walked away from Shigure's house in same direction that Kyou ran. She's going to go find him, if she can gather her courage from her source of inspiration.
He must accept her by the same amount that she accepts him. If he allows himself to be healed by her, it will be alright.
God help us.
Session 12 - Shigure - Regret
It wasn't supposed to be this way. In the past few hours, so much has changed. Yuki, Kyou and I should be sitting around the kitchen table talking about our day. Yuki would say that he was doing something important related to student counsel, and Kyou would take his words as an insult to his manhood. Yuki and Kyou would argue with each other, but then they would mysteriously stop fighting once Tohru came into the room. I would compliment my 'little flower' on a wonderful meal, say something perverted, and then be punched in the face for my actions. Just like always. But instead, the people within the house was silent and unmoving. It's changed.
I didn't want to let Tohru go off alone after Kyou. But I let it happen, and she walked off alone. I was still inside my house, sheltered from the events that were taking place in my own backyard. I didn't deserve such a luxury. She was an outsider to our family, and didn't have anything to do with this. She shouldn't have to be burdened with our family's dark history. I heard the back door open and the light pounding of feet running out onto the cement, which stopped once there was grass under the feet- Yuki had left the house to go after them. I could faintly hear Kagura talking to herself in the room beside me, mumbling something about her 'precious' Kyou.
I followed Yuki's suit, opening the door and heading out into the night. I ignored the soaked form of Kazuma and ran past him. I ignored the fact that my indoor slippers were going to be destroyed. I ignored everything except for one thing - Tohru. I ran until I could find her. I slowed down once I reached the woods so that I wouldn't trip.
I finally found her, but it was not a pretty sight - she was a mess. I couldn't help but stand and watch her for a few minutes, the reality of the situation didn't sink in. She was leaning over the trunk of a fallen tree, leaning one hand against the steady trunk of a tree which still stood. She had mud all over her, and her back was shaking. I shook my head as I watched her cry all alone. She suddenly let go of the tree and leaned into the fallen tree further as she started to throw up in shock.
My feet acted as if they were cemented to the ground, I rarely get scared like this. Usually I pretend to get scared to see a reaction from Kyou or Tohru, but this fear was real. Beams of light flickered over her from the headlights of a car. The lights turned off, and so did the motor of the car which projected it. Out came the thin figure of Akito, the clan head. He shut the door with a loud thud, which startled Tohru, but she didn't stand up. He walked slowly from the car towards her until he finally sat down on the fallen tree beside her.
"Poor thing," was all he could muster up, said in a tone of mock pity. He leaned over and took a close look at her face, which was stained with tears and dirt. "How awful. They really thought that someone like you could save us." The tight smile on his face widened into a cruel grin. He sat and watched her struggle, apparently pleased with the turn of events. "You deserve this."
My feet finally started to follow my directives. I took a few steps forward, bringing myself into his field of vision. I called his name in a serious yet almost desperate tone of voice that I've never heard myself use before. He looked up to me, startled. His grin was replaced with a small smile, and he gazed back at Tohru. "This is what happens when you try to interfere. Go home."
He walked off and returned to his car. As quickly as he had come, he was gone.
"Home," Tohru whispered as she stared at the forest floor. It was Sohma land, a place where she could never belong.
"Tohru, I'm sorry," I said, falling to my knees, not caring about the thick mud. Tears formed at my eyes. "I thought that you could.... You still can, we've got to end this! I know you can."
She got to her feet, and walked away from me. She mumbled something incoherently and left. All I could do was watch her walk out of my vision. "I'm so, so sorry, Tohru-kun."
Session 13 - Hanajima - Watchful Eyes
Wearing my heaviest cloak, I walked towards Kyoko's grave with Arisa. She kept on asking me why I wanted to come out to visit her grave in this bad weather. I couldn't give her an answer that she could understand. Something was calling me out to that place, electric waves that needed my attention. If I didn't get out there, who would? There were a lot of ominous signals in the air which were worrying me greatly; someone was going to get hurt.
Uotani Arisa stared at me in disbelief. She couldn't believe that she had actually followed me here. She sighed in exasperation after she asked why once again and receive the same obscure reply. She was about to argue some more, but I wasn't paying her any attention. Instead, I stopped walking and stared ahead of me. Arisa followed my gaze to Kyoko's stone grave marker. Lying by it in a crumpled heap, Tohru was crying. She wanted to be as close to her mother as she could possibly be, looking for her kind words and strength. Akito wanted her to go home, but this was all there was left. Home.
Arisa was shocked, and she ran as fast as her legs could carry her towards Tohru. She didn't look up at her blonde friend, she was crying too hard into the stone. I followed Arisa closely, and pulled her away from Tohru as she tried to comfort her.
I told her that we couldn't hold her and comfort her like we wanted, but Arisa ignored me. She spun away from me and bent down to talk to her again. Angered, I pushed her onto the ground with all of my powers. The waves were getting stronger, I could feel it. This was the way it had to be.
"Tohru, just go! Please!" I called out to Tohru and I explained that she had something that only she was meant to do. Arisa stared at me for a few seconds from her place on the wet dirt. She ran out, declaring that she was going to be there when Tohru needed her, and attacked me. I, too, fell to the ground. I yelled again, imploring Tohru to go where she was needed. "Get up! Go, please!" She looked up from her mother's grave towards me, and then back at the stone again. I got up and held Arisa still; I would never let anyone hinder Tohru. Painstakingly, Tohru stood on wobbly legs, as if she hadn't done such a simple thing in years. The wet mud dripped down her legs, and I noticed that she had lost her shoe somewhere. But she walked, and headed back into the forest from whence she came.
I couldn't hold back anymore. I sobbed into my dress, letting go of Arisa and falling back to the ground. Supporting myself by my arms, I let my tears fall from my face and into the layer of water on the surface of the grass.
Arisa stared at me in disbelief, but I didn't care. I did the best I could do to ensure Tohru's safety. I prayed for her life to the Gods, and I knew that she would be alright.
________________________
Author Notes:
Chapter 4, Sessions 10 - 13; Uploaded June 25th 2003.
I do not own the rights to any of the characters mentioned in this fan fiction.