A/N:  Back again, and after a death threat if I didn't write the next chapter (it was in a review and hopefully it was joking but I wrote this chapter so…), and there's no way I'm going to let this be one of those forgotten fics that you start reading and then the author just stops updating them…don't you just find that frustrating.

Randomness of the Moraco:  I was humoured that no one has made any comments about the boys toilets not having urinals, but if any of you were wondering and just didn't feel like saying anything, it's because I think Hogwarts is like a home to the students who live there, and at home, you have a toilet and no urinals (that is unless you're like my neighbor who has a urinal in his garage cuase he likes to spend all his time out there and doesn't want to have to go in the house to take a piss).

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Hard To Explain

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Chapter 8

I Just Don't Remember

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            Severus sunk down to the floor of the stall and there he sat staring off into space until the last of the Gryffindors had left the restroom.  *Why did I do it? He's a stupid monster.  I hate him! I hate him!  But….it's only in my mind that I hate him.  My heart still loves him.  Stupid Remus!  Stupid Sirius Black, with his "Want to find out one of Remus' little secrets?"  Stupid them!  Stupid potion! What am I talking about?  I'm the stupid one.  Really, to think a stupid potion would make Remus mine.*  Severus stood and moped to the dungeons to the Slytherin dormitories, where he would sit and ponder the previous events even more

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Sirius, James and Peter strode into their dormitory after returning from the infirmary.  As they opened the door, Sirius was the first to notice Remus passed out on the floor with dried blood on his face.  He ran to his boyfriend, as though he'd completely forgotten any previous events, and scooped Remus into his arms and moved him over to his bed, where he tried a few methods to get him to wake up.  Sirius eventually found that the most effective was a kiss.

Remus' eyes fluttered open slowly to view an obviously very worried Sirius Black

"Remus, what happened to you?"

"What?"

"You look bad mate," James commented.

"You're bleeding.  Or rather you were bleeding, it's dried now," Peter added.

Remus sat up with some obvious slight difficulty to do so.  "Lily Evans happened to me.  The last thing I remember is her punching me but I don't recall what we were talking about."  Remus looked down at his bare chest.  "I'm having a bit of trouble remember why I'm very shirtless as well."

"You mean you don't remember what happened in the toilets?"  Sirius asked.

"Sadly I do remember."  He turned to Sirius, eyes beginning to water,  "I'm sorry.  I'm so sorry.  I don't know what came over me.  It was like I couldn't help myself, like something was making me do it."

"Knowing Snape, he probably managed to put something in your drink and wanted to toy with you for his own pleasures," Peter said.

James replied very sarcastically, "Thanks a lot, Pete.  You just had to say the words pleasures and Snape in one sentence.  Now I'm going to be having nightmares out my arse for months."

Sirius looked Remus in the eye.  "You mean there was nothing behind it?  No emotions from your end?"

"Not quite," Remus replied.

Sirius backed away from his boyfriend with sad eyes.  "What is 'not quite' supposed to mean?"

"That something I needed to talk to you about."

Sirius turned to look over his shoulder where James and Peter were both gawking at them.  "Guys, do you mind?"

"Oh, sure we don't, we'll be out of your hair quicker than a snap can explode," James replied.  He and Peter both made their way for the common room, where they sat on the large over stuffed couch awaiting the outcome of their friends' squabble.

"So, what's this not quite business about?"

Remus sighed.  "It goes back before we got together, when Severus and I were on the verge of being almost friends.  I found him attractive.  He had that tall, dark, mysterious quality about him.  But you were the one I was in love with Sirius.  He was just someone I liked.  He was someone that if I'd had the opportunity might have had a fling, but nothing more, with.  I love you Sirius Black."

"So all you wanted to do is admit to me that you had feelings for Snape?"

"That's not all.  Last night, in the library I ran into him.  I confronted him about the way he'd been acting towards me and at some point in the whole conversation, or lack there of, he blurted out something about loving me," Remus explained.

"You're absolutely sure, that what happened in the toilets, you did completely against your own will power?"

"Yes.  I'm serious Sirius.  I would never do something like that to hurt you."

Sirius sighed and looked at the ground.  He pondered the events of when he knew Remus had found out who was behind the Shack incident. "Not even kiss my best friend?"

A puzzled look dawned Remus' face, "What are you talking about?"

"A couple of days after the Shack incident.  I'd left the dormitory to take a bath and when I came back you and James.  You were-" Sirius sniffled a bit.

"Oh," Remus said.  "That, he was, James was trying to comfort me.  I couldn't believe what you'd done.  And look who's talking.  James told me about your kissing practice."

"At least that was before we were an us," Sirius snapped.  "Either way, as long as you're sure you had nothing to do with your Snape snog session in the toilets, it leads me only to believe that Snape is up to something, considering the encounter you told me of."

"Please don't go all muggle detective on me, determined to get to the bottom of this.  Let's just leave it be."

"Remus, you're my boyfriend.  Just let me actually get to the bottom of this.  Snape has no right to be toying around with you," Sirius told him.

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Later in the day classes were over and all the Gryffindors were flooding into the tower.  Lily came in and went immediately to James.

"Why weren't any of you in class today James?" she asked.

"We all got hurt, or in Peter's case, sick, during the boys toilets incident," he explained.  "Then supposedly Remus was unable to attend classes because of you."

"Just as well, he should keep his hands off me."

"What?"

"He kissed me," She said.  "Then he ranted something about kissing being comforting and you being bisexual.  I a bit scared of what would have happened if I hadn't knocked him out."

"Oh.  Well we did come to find that Remus may have been under the influence of some sort of potion or spell at the time."

"No.  He may have been under the influence of something in the toilets, but he wasn't when he was with me," She said.  "I can tell.  At first he was normal, and then it was as though something primitive had taken over him.  I just can't explain it, but I'm scared.  Not just for myself, but for Remus."

"I see," James replied.  "Lily, there's…There's something that you don't know about Remus."

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A/N:  Wow the 8th chapter.  This is now officially the longest fan fic I've written and posted on ffn.  The cliffhanger this time wasn't really too big, I don't think, but all the same I think it's going to have some of you lovely readers wondering…Thank you all so much for all the reviews I've been getting, all you reviewers are just totally wicked cool.  And if you feel like being even more wicked cool, review again, I like to hear opinions on chapters as I go along.