Title: Practical Love
Chapter: 3/?
Author: Naoki / Naoki_pyromaniac@hotmail.com
Rating/Warnings/Categories: PG-13, romance to the fifth fluffy heart degree, semi AU.
Summary: Eowyn, the White Lady of Rohan, is good friends with Faramir of Gondor, yet when he comes to Edoras with his bride to be, she realises things weren't as simple as she thought...
Author's Notes: More pure, fluffy romance! Faramir introduces his bride (boo!) and Eowyn finds herself at odds with conflicting emotions...will it all turn out happily? Probably, as am flaky romantic at heart...
~*~
Practical Love, Chapter Three
~*~
Sleepiness had prowled in Éowyn's chambers, waiting with a bag full of dreams, and it was not long before Éowyn fell asleep, thinking to herself that it was unnatural for her to feel so weary so early in the afternoon. Darkness fell in her mind's eye as dusk fell on Rohan, and she woke to a soft tapping on her door, her heart beating wildly against her chest.
Her left hand ached a little and she realised with little surprise that she had it tightly clenched as if she had been holding something in her dream, she shook her head and her hair fell limp against her damp skin as she sat up, wondering if Faramir had come to speak with her.
"Come in...I am dressed" she called, gripping her wrist and feeling a sharp twinge of pain. The door opened and Éomer entered with an expression of concern on his face. "What is wrong?" asked Éowyn softly, her smile faltering.
"I came to ask you that very question, sister, you seemed split in two minds before...which you usually are when something troubles you" he said, pulling a chair opposite her to sit down on, which he did without taking his eyes off her.
"Nothing troubles me..." - said in an air of irritation that indicated the exact opposite of the words.
"Not Faramir's arrival or choice of companion?" questioned Éomer, noticing Eowyn's grimace.
"No, I do admit I thought...that I loved him but it was a moment of, of uncertainty on my part. It's nothing...Lady Rowan is a...intelligent woman and a suited match for Faramir's personality" said Éowyn firmly, holding her brother with a look that would have made him retreat from the topic immediately but he could not forget that pained expression from before so quickly.
"Remember my promise to you in Gondor?" he asked quietly, Éowyn looked up at him wide eyed and pensive but Éomer was not sure if the expression came from the laboured tone he used or the memories it stirred. "How you told me you feared to be alone and I promised not to take a wife until you had taken a husband? We have never talked so openly about our emotions nor our pasts and futures since then...and I remember how bleak you seemed, how distant...I do not want you to fall into that trap again-"
"I will not..." replied Éowyn quickly, holding her brother's hands tightly "Thank you, brother...I promise you that I do not carry any unhappiness within me...I will meet you in the feasting hall in an hour" said Éowyn, tactfully leading him to the door where he left with some reluctance.
She felt herself draw in her breath and hold it far too long before she called for Angharad.
~*~
Faramir reflected darkly that little could have prepared him for his arrival at Edoras, from the moment he had entered the place and seen her, dressed in white with golden hair to her waist, simply standing there and being the world to him at the same time, he knew that he shouldn't have come.
And she didn't even realise it.
He had been cool and impartial, trying not to let the kiss on her hand linger, trying not to hold her gaze for longer than a brief moment...still, Rowan had been especially cold towards him since the morning and the afternoon ride they had gone on was tainted with Rowan's quiet emotions of animosity.
He felt the beginnings of a headache and wondered why he had let his relationship with Rowan become more than he had ever meant it to be and imeddiately squashed the unkind thought before it was half formed yet he had the nagging doubt within himself, asking if he had really thought he could forget Éowyn by putting Rowan in her place?
It was true they had many traits in likeness but where Rowan was tender, Éowyn was kind. The same trait, yet different in some way. His marriage to Rowan was to take place as soon as he returned to Gondor, yet Faramir still wasn't sure if he was doing the right thing. He loved Rowan and she loved him...wasn't that better than spending a life in pursuit of someone he could never have?
He should never have come to Edoras, he realised. His commitment was made to another though, and Faramir knew even with Éowyn on his mind, that he had not entered such a commitment lightly. Rowan loved him...he loved her, that was enough to make a union work, was it not?
~*~
An hour later, Éowyn was ready, dressed in brilliant white material that seemed to glow in the dim light of the corridors and on her head sat a small crown but much to her chagrin, Angharad had hidden the small ornamental sword she often wore with her formal dresses as a mark of her status as a Shieldmaiden so she felt curiously light and wary as she entered the hall, lit with the light of hundreds of candles which were reflected by the many decorative shields and swords, bearing the helm of Rohan, hanging on the walls.
"Éowyn!" called Eomer, swiftly reaching her with another man, who was tawny haired with light, blue eyes that seemed to dart about until they settled quite firmly on her, they studied her and seemed to see all she was and Éowyn shivered even in the warmth of the hall - "This is Aldwyn of Gondor, a advisor to Lord Faramir, he has been to Rohan many times and speaks our language better than any of Gondor. Aldwyn, this is my sister, Lady Éowyn"
"Good evening, Lady Éowyn...Shieldmaiden of Rohan. I am honoured to meet you," said Aldwyn softly, lifting Éowyn's hand as if to kiss it yet he was not perturbed when she drew it back, unsure of him. He was a true advisor, and knew how to bend words to his will...like Grima had. He seemed young for such a position of responsibility yet perhaps that was part of his talents; Éowyn paused in her assessment of him to gaze at her brother who seemed eager to leave them alone together, something in Éowyn's mind clicked.
By the Valar...he can not be proposing himself as my matchmaker! I will not allow it!
Excusing herself as politely as she could, she went to sit at her place at Éomer's side, beyond the empty seat, to her right sat a weary looking Faramir. Rowan appeared to be in a corner, talking with various nobles of Rohan and silently they sat, both thinking to themselves that the distance between them seemed so insignificant yet so vast, until Faramir cleared his throat.
"I should apologise for my behaviour this morning, it must have seemed very distant and informal...after our friendship in Gondor"
"I did not notice" Éowyn replied, equally blank and rigid in tone and form. "Tell me about that man over there, Aldwyn, my brother said he had come with you"
"Yes, but I do not think he would have had it another way..." said Faramir with wistful amusement, as if recalling a fond memory of Aldwyn's insistence "He is a scholar of your history and language, only five and twenty years but his education made him invaluable to us...and us unable to argue otherwise were persuaded to bring him, I hope he hasn't been bothering you"
"Nay! He just seems so young to be so important" explained Éowyn with a small smile, reflecting on Aldwyn's 'insistence' - perhaps he had disguised his own desires by exploiting desire to serve his country? Éowyn knew she had rode to Pelennor Fields with only the desire to serve Rohan in her heart, yet afterwards, she had felt ashamed of her behaviour...she had abandoned her other duties to the disobedience of everyone for her own wishes
While she knew her own wishes had included her desire to serve Rohan in battle - it was the mixing of the two that troubled her, a warrior's heart in battle should be pure...not marred by doubt or consideration of purpose. Rohan should have been her only thought that day, but so many other things had crossed her mind...especially when-
She was abruptly broken away from her thoughts as Éomer sat beside her and began talking to her. Fatigue seemed to wash over her again, like tepid water, and much earlier than was customary and polite, she left feeling oddly light headed.
She reached the cool hallway that led to her chamber, despite all lights seeming misty and blinding to her vision, and she felt her body shaking, betraying her mind, which began to ache so much with trying to stand up and stay up. A moment later, she felt herself sitting on the floor, leaning on the cold wall, panting as if her tongue was withered at the root.
"It's alright," said a voice, softly in her ear. "I'll take you to your chambers...shush..."
She felt someone's arm around her waist, and felt her arm being wrapped around someone's shoulder as if they were going to carry her, despite her weakly voiced objections. "Aldwyn...just fetch my brother or Angharad or-"
"It's Faramir, Éowyn...I followed you, you did not seem well when you left and..."
Éowyn couldn't remember if he trailed off and left things unsaid or if the darkness washed over her but the next thing she could clearly recall was a soft, cool blanket being laid over her. She had not been changed, but wore only the under-robe she wore beneath her dress; her hair had been brushed to one side and loosely gathered and bound. Someone was with her.
"Faramir...?"
"Yes?"
"Good" was all Éowyn managed to reply before she finally fell asleep.
~*~
Everything was black, except for the sun, which was a blazing white, burning with a shimmering heat. The soil beneath her feet was black, dry and prickly as she ran, lost in a world of darkness. Nowhere for her to hide, and even though she was dressed in white, she shone like a star. She stumbled, tears flowing though had hardly ever cried in the waking world yet here they seemed all too frequent. Her hands fell in front of her, grasped a recognisable yet unfamiliar shape, it was a silver brooch.
In her dream, Éowyn stood up, no longer a defenseless child. In her dream, she looked at the brooch in her hand, never had she been able to see it so clearly and she wondered why it had never been obvious to her before. In her hand, which seemed surrounded by an aura of glowing light, she held a brooch that she recognised instantly. The White Tree of Gondor, a brooch and design she had first seen on Faramir's armor that day in Gondor...
She awoke to soft voices and a cool hand upon her forehead.
~*~
"You slept for so long, I was afraid we might have lost you," said Angharad later that morning, "And you missed the departure of Lord Faramir and Lady Rowan-"
"Did I? How long have I slept for?" asked Éowyn, sitting up at a speed that made her bones and joints cry out in protest. "Surely not a month has gone past...surely he would not have left knowing how ill I was..." she spoke partly to herself and herself alone as she felt her heart beating, like a terrified bird, in her chest.
"No longer than a few days, but they finished the talks early and it seemed to the Lord Faramir and Lady Rowan that they should return to Gondor in order to marry...it is many days away yet, and you are to leave as soon as you are well enough so rest until you have the strength to do something about your worries"
Éowyn conceded the wisdom in her words, yet felt frustrated in the way her mind and body had betrayed her but it was only a passing phrase compared to the tremendous feeling of heartache that seemed to permeate her spirit and draw it out, making her feel empty inside.
~*~
A few days later,, Éomer and Éowyn began their journey to Gondor to attend the wedding of Faramir and Rowan, both remained more or less silent during the trip - Éowyn tending to her private heartache, Éomer regretting his decision to agree to let Aldwyn stay on after the others had left as the youth talked endlessly of obscure historical facts and legends. Éomer had never felt his country was such a wearisome subject, but in Aldwyn's hands, it was a fearsome weapon indeed.
Éowyn rode on, reflecting darkly on Rowan's early promise to protect what was hers...she had no doubt that the other woman had planned it this way and wondered, bitterly, why she wanted to keep them apart even though she had Faramir's complete attention and affection...it was possible that not even friendship would be permitted now.
And that would be unbearable.
Chapter: 3/?
Author: Naoki / Naoki_pyromaniac@hotmail.com
Rating/Warnings/Categories: PG-13, romance to the fifth fluffy heart degree, semi AU.
Summary: Eowyn, the White Lady of Rohan, is good friends with Faramir of Gondor, yet when he comes to Edoras with his bride to be, she realises things weren't as simple as she thought...
Author's Notes: More pure, fluffy romance! Faramir introduces his bride (boo!) and Eowyn finds herself at odds with conflicting emotions...will it all turn out happily? Probably, as am flaky romantic at heart...
~*~
Practical Love, Chapter Three
~*~
Sleepiness had prowled in Éowyn's chambers, waiting with a bag full of dreams, and it was not long before Éowyn fell asleep, thinking to herself that it was unnatural for her to feel so weary so early in the afternoon. Darkness fell in her mind's eye as dusk fell on Rohan, and she woke to a soft tapping on her door, her heart beating wildly against her chest.
Her left hand ached a little and she realised with little surprise that she had it tightly clenched as if she had been holding something in her dream, she shook her head and her hair fell limp against her damp skin as she sat up, wondering if Faramir had come to speak with her.
"Come in...I am dressed" she called, gripping her wrist and feeling a sharp twinge of pain. The door opened and Éomer entered with an expression of concern on his face. "What is wrong?" asked Éowyn softly, her smile faltering.
"I came to ask you that very question, sister, you seemed split in two minds before...which you usually are when something troubles you" he said, pulling a chair opposite her to sit down on, which he did without taking his eyes off her.
"Nothing troubles me..." - said in an air of irritation that indicated the exact opposite of the words.
"Not Faramir's arrival or choice of companion?" questioned Éomer, noticing Eowyn's grimace.
"No, I do admit I thought...that I loved him but it was a moment of, of uncertainty on my part. It's nothing...Lady Rowan is a...intelligent woman and a suited match for Faramir's personality" said Éowyn firmly, holding her brother with a look that would have made him retreat from the topic immediately but he could not forget that pained expression from before so quickly.
"Remember my promise to you in Gondor?" he asked quietly, Éowyn looked up at him wide eyed and pensive but Éomer was not sure if the expression came from the laboured tone he used or the memories it stirred. "How you told me you feared to be alone and I promised not to take a wife until you had taken a husband? We have never talked so openly about our emotions nor our pasts and futures since then...and I remember how bleak you seemed, how distant...I do not want you to fall into that trap again-"
"I will not..." replied Éowyn quickly, holding her brother's hands tightly "Thank you, brother...I promise you that I do not carry any unhappiness within me...I will meet you in the feasting hall in an hour" said Éowyn, tactfully leading him to the door where he left with some reluctance.
She felt herself draw in her breath and hold it far too long before she called for Angharad.
~*~
Faramir reflected darkly that little could have prepared him for his arrival at Edoras, from the moment he had entered the place and seen her, dressed in white with golden hair to her waist, simply standing there and being the world to him at the same time, he knew that he shouldn't have come.
And she didn't even realise it.
He had been cool and impartial, trying not to let the kiss on her hand linger, trying not to hold her gaze for longer than a brief moment...still, Rowan had been especially cold towards him since the morning and the afternoon ride they had gone on was tainted with Rowan's quiet emotions of animosity.
He felt the beginnings of a headache and wondered why he had let his relationship with Rowan become more than he had ever meant it to be and imeddiately squashed the unkind thought before it was half formed yet he had the nagging doubt within himself, asking if he had really thought he could forget Éowyn by putting Rowan in her place?
It was true they had many traits in likeness but where Rowan was tender, Éowyn was kind. The same trait, yet different in some way. His marriage to Rowan was to take place as soon as he returned to Gondor, yet Faramir still wasn't sure if he was doing the right thing. He loved Rowan and she loved him...wasn't that better than spending a life in pursuit of someone he could never have?
He should never have come to Edoras, he realised. His commitment was made to another though, and Faramir knew even with Éowyn on his mind, that he had not entered such a commitment lightly. Rowan loved him...he loved her, that was enough to make a union work, was it not?
~*~
An hour later, Éowyn was ready, dressed in brilliant white material that seemed to glow in the dim light of the corridors and on her head sat a small crown but much to her chagrin, Angharad had hidden the small ornamental sword she often wore with her formal dresses as a mark of her status as a Shieldmaiden so she felt curiously light and wary as she entered the hall, lit with the light of hundreds of candles which were reflected by the many decorative shields and swords, bearing the helm of Rohan, hanging on the walls.
"Éowyn!" called Eomer, swiftly reaching her with another man, who was tawny haired with light, blue eyes that seemed to dart about until they settled quite firmly on her, they studied her and seemed to see all she was and Éowyn shivered even in the warmth of the hall - "This is Aldwyn of Gondor, a advisor to Lord Faramir, he has been to Rohan many times and speaks our language better than any of Gondor. Aldwyn, this is my sister, Lady Éowyn"
"Good evening, Lady Éowyn...Shieldmaiden of Rohan. I am honoured to meet you," said Aldwyn softly, lifting Éowyn's hand as if to kiss it yet he was not perturbed when she drew it back, unsure of him. He was a true advisor, and knew how to bend words to his will...like Grima had. He seemed young for such a position of responsibility yet perhaps that was part of his talents; Éowyn paused in her assessment of him to gaze at her brother who seemed eager to leave them alone together, something in Éowyn's mind clicked.
By the Valar...he can not be proposing himself as my matchmaker! I will not allow it!
Excusing herself as politely as she could, she went to sit at her place at Éomer's side, beyond the empty seat, to her right sat a weary looking Faramir. Rowan appeared to be in a corner, talking with various nobles of Rohan and silently they sat, both thinking to themselves that the distance between them seemed so insignificant yet so vast, until Faramir cleared his throat.
"I should apologise for my behaviour this morning, it must have seemed very distant and informal...after our friendship in Gondor"
"I did not notice" Éowyn replied, equally blank and rigid in tone and form. "Tell me about that man over there, Aldwyn, my brother said he had come with you"
"Yes, but I do not think he would have had it another way..." said Faramir with wistful amusement, as if recalling a fond memory of Aldwyn's insistence "He is a scholar of your history and language, only five and twenty years but his education made him invaluable to us...and us unable to argue otherwise were persuaded to bring him, I hope he hasn't been bothering you"
"Nay! He just seems so young to be so important" explained Éowyn with a small smile, reflecting on Aldwyn's 'insistence' - perhaps he had disguised his own desires by exploiting desire to serve his country? Éowyn knew she had rode to Pelennor Fields with only the desire to serve Rohan in her heart, yet afterwards, she had felt ashamed of her behaviour...she had abandoned her other duties to the disobedience of everyone for her own wishes
While she knew her own wishes had included her desire to serve Rohan in battle - it was the mixing of the two that troubled her, a warrior's heart in battle should be pure...not marred by doubt or consideration of purpose. Rohan should have been her only thought that day, but so many other things had crossed her mind...especially when-
She was abruptly broken away from her thoughts as Éomer sat beside her and began talking to her. Fatigue seemed to wash over her again, like tepid water, and much earlier than was customary and polite, she left feeling oddly light headed.
She reached the cool hallway that led to her chamber, despite all lights seeming misty and blinding to her vision, and she felt her body shaking, betraying her mind, which began to ache so much with trying to stand up and stay up. A moment later, she felt herself sitting on the floor, leaning on the cold wall, panting as if her tongue was withered at the root.
"It's alright," said a voice, softly in her ear. "I'll take you to your chambers...shush..."
She felt someone's arm around her waist, and felt her arm being wrapped around someone's shoulder as if they were going to carry her, despite her weakly voiced objections. "Aldwyn...just fetch my brother or Angharad or-"
"It's Faramir, Éowyn...I followed you, you did not seem well when you left and..."
Éowyn couldn't remember if he trailed off and left things unsaid or if the darkness washed over her but the next thing she could clearly recall was a soft, cool blanket being laid over her. She had not been changed, but wore only the under-robe she wore beneath her dress; her hair had been brushed to one side and loosely gathered and bound. Someone was with her.
"Faramir...?"
"Yes?"
"Good" was all Éowyn managed to reply before she finally fell asleep.
~*~
Everything was black, except for the sun, which was a blazing white, burning with a shimmering heat. The soil beneath her feet was black, dry and prickly as she ran, lost in a world of darkness. Nowhere for her to hide, and even though she was dressed in white, she shone like a star. She stumbled, tears flowing though had hardly ever cried in the waking world yet here they seemed all too frequent. Her hands fell in front of her, grasped a recognisable yet unfamiliar shape, it was a silver brooch.
In her dream, Éowyn stood up, no longer a defenseless child. In her dream, she looked at the brooch in her hand, never had she been able to see it so clearly and she wondered why it had never been obvious to her before. In her hand, which seemed surrounded by an aura of glowing light, she held a brooch that she recognised instantly. The White Tree of Gondor, a brooch and design she had first seen on Faramir's armor that day in Gondor...
She awoke to soft voices and a cool hand upon her forehead.
~*~
"You slept for so long, I was afraid we might have lost you," said Angharad later that morning, "And you missed the departure of Lord Faramir and Lady Rowan-"
"Did I? How long have I slept for?" asked Éowyn, sitting up at a speed that made her bones and joints cry out in protest. "Surely not a month has gone past...surely he would not have left knowing how ill I was..." she spoke partly to herself and herself alone as she felt her heart beating, like a terrified bird, in her chest.
"No longer than a few days, but they finished the talks early and it seemed to the Lord Faramir and Lady Rowan that they should return to Gondor in order to marry...it is many days away yet, and you are to leave as soon as you are well enough so rest until you have the strength to do something about your worries"
Éowyn conceded the wisdom in her words, yet felt frustrated in the way her mind and body had betrayed her but it was only a passing phrase compared to the tremendous feeling of heartache that seemed to permeate her spirit and draw it out, making her feel empty inside.
~*~
A few days later,, Éomer and Éowyn began their journey to Gondor to attend the wedding of Faramir and Rowan, both remained more or less silent during the trip - Éowyn tending to her private heartache, Éomer regretting his decision to agree to let Aldwyn stay on after the others had left as the youth talked endlessly of obscure historical facts and legends. Éomer had never felt his country was such a wearisome subject, but in Aldwyn's hands, it was a fearsome weapon indeed.
Éowyn rode on, reflecting darkly on Rowan's early promise to protect what was hers...she had no doubt that the other woman had planned it this way and wondered, bitterly, why she wanted to keep them apart even though she had Faramir's complete attention and affection...it was possible that not even friendship would be permitted now.
And that would be unbearable.