*...Wow. I'm on a roll. Kind of. ...hah. I'm just a -little- pissed that
FF.net decided to take all the NC-17 fics down. There goes one of my most
favorite Weiss Kruez fics - Bishounen. Lucky for me, I copied the story and
saved it so I could read it. That fic is gorgeous, it's simply wonderful.
Er...back onto the subject of the fourth chapter. o.O; Um... I hope you
like it... Yeah. ^-^;*
Always - Chapter 4 - Uncertain Future
But as much as Yuki would like to believe that Shuichi was actually calling his name.. he was dead wrong. He knew it, too. There was no denying the truth - Shuichi was in a coma... and the doctors had said the chances of him getting out of it were slim to none.
He finally mustered up the strength to pry his sobbing self from the pavement just outside of the hospital and work his way to his car. He fumbled around with the keys after he threw himself into the drivers side seat, but he couldn't find the right one through his blurred vision. He eventually gave up and dropped the keys into his lap as he leaned forward, his forehead colliding rather harshly with the steering wheel.
"I can't do this."
. . . . . .
Hiro sighed, shaking his head in disappointment as he took his turn visiting Shuichi. He shuffled over to the bed and sat beside the quickly thinning boy. ...It was funny how much weight Shuichi lost - how much colour left his skin... how lifeless he looked. Slender digits brushed pink filaments from the boys pale face, "Shuichi... I don't know... what Yuki did... why he strode out of here so fast... but I hope it wasn't too bad. He loves you, I know he does... this... just must be hard for him, that's all. Besides... I'll always be here for you."
.. He paused, frowning as he leaned in to place a kiss on the boys chapped lips before pulling himself back up, "I know I can't replace the one you love... but I'll always be there for you. I don't care if it's a one-sided love... as long as you're happy then I'm happy. I'd walk to the ends of the earth and back just to see you smile and I wont let this ruin any of that. I'm not going to leave you... I'm going to be here when you wake up. I promise."
Hiroshi thought it funny the way that Shuichi ignored the fact that he knew how much he loved him. He either ignored it or he didn't comprehend it. They had grown up together - they were the best friends in the world... it was almost inevitable that Hiro would find himself in love with Shuichi. He was lucky, however, and though he was jealous of the boys relationship with Yuki, he never tried to break them up.
. . . . . .
Shuichi wanted to hug Hiro, he wanted to wrap his arms around him and pull him into an embrace that rivaled that of all the others. He wanted to thank him and tell him how grateful he was that he had a friend like Hiro. '... I know, I know... God, you have no idea...' He would have jumped, if he could, when he felt the other's lips brush against his. He would have blushed and shied away...
He was growing rather upset again at not being able to do anything besides lie there like an overgrown doll of some sort. It was working on his nerves. ...Thoughts of death lingering in his head. He had caught a short glimpse of the world after... however brief, it was rather gorgeous. Bright lights and pastels... Maybe it was just what he wanted to see.
Endless black. That's all he had now. And pain, god... the pain was almost too much to bear at times but the medicine they gave him worked rather well. The only pain it didn't numb was the pain in his heart... he couldn't bare everything happening. Yuki had left him and Hiro was admitting much more than he should have been. This all made Shuichi's thoughts clash with one another... his head felt like goo.
But he could feel it - he could feel his life start to slip away before slowly coming back. He could feel the way his heart began to slow down and he could hear his breathing become raspy and drawn out. It was tearing him apart inside - he hated to think that his life depended on the medicine and the blood transfusions and everything - ... no. It didn't depened on that. It depended on him.
It depended on his will to go on - it depended on Hiroshi's love and friendship. ...It depended on the one who had abandoned him. The arrogant writer who shut most feelings away in a little corner in his heart and shared them only when he saw the need to. Shuichi was pathetic. He couldn't believe how much he relied on other people for his happiness... and how much people most often overlooked loved him unconditionally.
But he didn't know where this was going to take him - how his relationships with people would change. What would become of he and Yuki? He just didn't know. Had his fans deserted him...? Would his music carreer be shot down as soon as he got out of the hospital...? Would... would he die in this bed with his best friend beside him instead of his lover?
No. Shuichi had to face it - Yuki wasn't going to be around anymore. So what now? Just live each day by the moment. He wouldn't worry about Yuki until this was all over - he couldn't deal with it. It was heartbreaking.
. . . . . .
Hiro smiled, slender digits now tracing the boys jawline, "I know how much you love him, Shuichi. ...But some people love you more than he ever could. He's so cold and distant.. but he... he does love you. You're so innocent... but I'm so proud of you. Never let him go - even if he wants you to... because you said you wouldn't and I expect you to live up to that." After placing a kiss on the boys cheek, he got to his feet and headed out of the room, quietly shutting the door behind him as he entered the hall.
*...Two chapters in one day. o.O; Yayness. Alright... well, I like these two chapters... ^-^ 3 and 4.. they're so cool. Well, I'll try my best to get another two or so chapters up by the end of Thanksgiving break... Please comment. o.o;*
Always - Chapter 4 - Uncertain Future
But as much as Yuki would like to believe that Shuichi was actually calling his name.. he was dead wrong. He knew it, too. There was no denying the truth - Shuichi was in a coma... and the doctors had said the chances of him getting out of it were slim to none.
He finally mustered up the strength to pry his sobbing self from the pavement just outside of the hospital and work his way to his car. He fumbled around with the keys after he threw himself into the drivers side seat, but he couldn't find the right one through his blurred vision. He eventually gave up and dropped the keys into his lap as he leaned forward, his forehead colliding rather harshly with the steering wheel.
"I can't do this."
. . . . . .
Hiro sighed, shaking his head in disappointment as he took his turn visiting Shuichi. He shuffled over to the bed and sat beside the quickly thinning boy. ...It was funny how much weight Shuichi lost - how much colour left his skin... how lifeless he looked. Slender digits brushed pink filaments from the boys pale face, "Shuichi... I don't know... what Yuki did... why he strode out of here so fast... but I hope it wasn't too bad. He loves you, I know he does... this... just must be hard for him, that's all. Besides... I'll always be here for you."
.. He paused, frowning as he leaned in to place a kiss on the boys chapped lips before pulling himself back up, "I know I can't replace the one you love... but I'll always be there for you. I don't care if it's a one-sided love... as long as you're happy then I'm happy. I'd walk to the ends of the earth and back just to see you smile and I wont let this ruin any of that. I'm not going to leave you... I'm going to be here when you wake up. I promise."
Hiroshi thought it funny the way that Shuichi ignored the fact that he knew how much he loved him. He either ignored it or he didn't comprehend it. They had grown up together - they were the best friends in the world... it was almost inevitable that Hiro would find himself in love with Shuichi. He was lucky, however, and though he was jealous of the boys relationship with Yuki, he never tried to break them up.
. . . . . .
Shuichi wanted to hug Hiro, he wanted to wrap his arms around him and pull him into an embrace that rivaled that of all the others. He wanted to thank him and tell him how grateful he was that he had a friend like Hiro. '... I know, I know... God, you have no idea...' He would have jumped, if he could, when he felt the other's lips brush against his. He would have blushed and shied away...
He was growing rather upset again at not being able to do anything besides lie there like an overgrown doll of some sort. It was working on his nerves. ...Thoughts of death lingering in his head. He had caught a short glimpse of the world after... however brief, it was rather gorgeous. Bright lights and pastels... Maybe it was just what he wanted to see.
Endless black. That's all he had now. And pain, god... the pain was almost too much to bear at times but the medicine they gave him worked rather well. The only pain it didn't numb was the pain in his heart... he couldn't bare everything happening. Yuki had left him and Hiro was admitting much more than he should have been. This all made Shuichi's thoughts clash with one another... his head felt like goo.
But he could feel it - he could feel his life start to slip away before slowly coming back. He could feel the way his heart began to slow down and he could hear his breathing become raspy and drawn out. It was tearing him apart inside - he hated to think that his life depended on the medicine and the blood transfusions and everything - ... no. It didn't depened on that. It depended on him.
It depended on his will to go on - it depended on Hiroshi's love and friendship. ...It depended on the one who had abandoned him. The arrogant writer who shut most feelings away in a little corner in his heart and shared them only when he saw the need to. Shuichi was pathetic. He couldn't believe how much he relied on other people for his happiness... and how much people most often overlooked loved him unconditionally.
But he didn't know where this was going to take him - how his relationships with people would change. What would become of he and Yuki? He just didn't know. Had his fans deserted him...? Would his music carreer be shot down as soon as he got out of the hospital...? Would... would he die in this bed with his best friend beside him instead of his lover?
No. Shuichi had to face it - Yuki wasn't going to be around anymore. So what now? Just live each day by the moment. He wouldn't worry about Yuki until this was all over - he couldn't deal with it. It was heartbreaking.
. . . . . .
Hiro smiled, slender digits now tracing the boys jawline, "I know how much you love him, Shuichi. ...But some people love you more than he ever could. He's so cold and distant.. but he... he does love you. You're so innocent... but I'm so proud of you. Never let him go - even if he wants you to... because you said you wouldn't and I expect you to live up to that." After placing a kiss on the boys cheek, he got to his feet and headed out of the room, quietly shutting the door behind him as he entered the hall.
*...Two chapters in one day. o.O; Yayness. Alright... well, I like these two chapters... ^-^ 3 and 4.. they're so cool. Well, I'll try my best to get another two or so chapters up by the end of Thanksgiving break... Please comment. o.o;*