Everything Important
Chapter Fifteen: Xavier's Tape
Xavier had excused himself from the wake.
The funeral had been sad and elegant. Huge groups of Abair's acquaintances and friends had shown up with the band, and the funeral was reduced to standing room only.
The wake, having spilled down the back lawn, now ended at a stage where The Dysfunction was playing covers of all of Abair's favorite songs.
Xavier steeled himself, and with a disgusted look, pushed 'play' on the remote.
"Hello Professor." The young man gave a slight, quirky smile. "I know how you feel about what I've done. At least, I think I do." He paused. "So I don't think we need to discuss it – because under any other circumstances I would believe as you do."
Xavier didn't want to soften. He didn't want to empathize. He set his jaw in anger.
"Life is not only wonderful and sacred." Abair seemed sincere. "But it's our big chance to experience the wonder and the … " He swallowed. "And the sacrosanct."
The boy on the screen pulled a small folded manuscript out of his back pocket. He unfolded it and opened it to a dog-eared page.
"I really wish you had finished this quote. – When you were convincing me to stay here and undergo the suspension. I picked it up in your library the next day. It's a pretty good read." He held the page in to the light and followed the words with his finger. "Come then, and see if she is not all I have said, see if there are not like minds among us, and chances to improve."
He smiled at the camera. "That's where you stopped the quote professor, remember?" He looked back to the page and mouthed a few stage directions quietly while he looked for where the dialog picked up.
"For I know that you will come and love her, earn your title and fortune, and take care of her for the rest of her life." He marked his place in the little book with his finger and turned to face the camera. "For that is everything in life. At least, everything important." He quoted.
He folded the play in half and tucked it in to the cushion of his chair.
"And I want to do it all Professor. Everything Important."
Xavier cocked his head in curiosity. What could he be talking about?
"Have your lawyers check the language of our contract. It reads - so long as 'Party A' submits himself to such restraint as is deemed necessary to insure the well being of those around him." He cast his eyes down for a moment and then back to the Professor.
"Well," He said at last. "I consider myself to be necessarily restrained and insuring the well being of those around me"
Xavier sat stunned. Is he serious? He wondered.
"You wanted to buy the world's safety, well, you've got it – at least from me."
"I want that second options package you told me about. The one hundred thousand dollars in stock investments with the dividends going in to a trust fund." He paused. "You said that by the end of the second half of the investment period that the residuals would be close to a million dollars."
The boys eyes began to shimmer with sheets of tears. "I figure she'll be about twenty one by then." He said sadly. "And I want you to give it to Rogue." He took a quick breath and settled himself. "And if – something, or anything – I mean, " He wiped his eyes. "If she's gone by then, with me – instead of you, then give it to Kurt. And tell him the whole story."
"I told her, on her tape, that if love could survive death I would give her a sign – on her twenty first birthday." He grinned, mostly to himself. "It would be very cool if you could make sure – that she gets her inheritance on that birthday." He whispered softly. "And it would mean everything to me - that she takes it as my sign." He rubbed his heart as though it hurt. "I want her to know that I was thinking of years and a future when I thought of her."
"But until then, … mums the word." He put his finger to his lips and forced a sad smile in to the camera.
Xavier nodded to the boy on the tape. His mind swam, producing the image of Rogue – on that day – gaining her inheritance and being assured that everything he said to her and felt for her were genuine. It made Xavier's heart swell in his chest.
How could I not do this?
Then, desperately, Abair said. "Make sure she's alright Charles. I touched her – and I wouldn't want my thoughts from tonight stuck in her head or anything – not with what I had to do." He looked away. "And be sure – absolutely sure that she didn't pick up my … my condition." He looked up suddenly "You said forty-five seconds and she would start to produce a similar toxin. But it didn't get anywhere near that point. She talked me down from forty to thirty seconds. But … Be sure."
Most people are out in ten anyway … Xavier considered. But I will check. It's the smart thing to do.
Abair composed himself. "I am not a liar, you know. I was willing to ... I made this deal in good faith. I mean, twelve years of hope … that's the most noble thing anyone had ever offered me." He swallowed.
"But … at what cost?"
"It's funny Professor. How the people worth living for - are also the ones worth dying for." He smiled.
"You've surrounded yourself with an incredible … family. And no one could ask for any better."
Xavier was hooked. How can I not empathize with the truth?
"And I can't sit beneath them, a human bomb, and threaten their lives for my own selfish hopes of a cure." He shook his head. "What if I killed them Charles?" His words became a horse whispered threat. "What if I killed them all?" He paused and stared menacingly from the screen.
"Or just one?" He cast his eyes down to the floor. "Her?" He looked up suddenly. "Or you." He looked mad. "Where would this world be if I killed you Charles?"
"And how long until someone decides to harvest my lungs to use as a weapon?" He cocked his head to one side. "You, at the very least, have to admit the possibility."
And Charles couldn't help but think of Mystique – and how she arranged the Juggernaught's escape in order to sneak in to the mansion and copy Cerebro's files.
Abair let out a maddeningly slow breath and literally seemed to pull himself together in to a strikingly handsome and charming young man.
"You sure have the life Professor." He wiped his left eye again. "And a beautiful dream." He was openly crying now, despite his calm demeanor and his clear focus. "And I'm sorry that I never really made it past the threshold."
"You can show this tape to the lawyers so there won't be any doubt." He smirked. " I retained that real nasty English lawyer you don't like. And he only gets paid if you default on your end of the bargain, so I guess he'll be watching you like a hawk." He smiled weakly and shrugged. "I just had to be sure."
"Oh, I had him register Rogue as my legal heir with the English authorities. They should have any problem accepting the documentation in the American courts. And ahhh…" The boy grinned. ". Don't ask me how but he managed to put the charge for that particular service on your gas card. I thought you should know."
"Good bye Professor."
"I mean, … Charles."
"And I am sorry – that I had to make this mess in your home." The boy moved slowly, sadly, and the image winked away.
Xavier lowered his head in to his hand and wiped his eyes with a thumb and forefinger. Grief, sorrow and anger churned within him, connected, marbled, and energized with love, loss, and regret. Maybe. He thought to himself. Maybe I ….
"Sacrosanct." The boy's voice spoke in his memory. And he saw them, in his mind, Standing together on the dock as strangers.
"Sacred." He heard Abair say, and he recalled seeing them, laughing, and holding each other on the back patio.
Xavier took a deep breath to steady himself. "… and take care of her for the rest of her life …" The young man seemed to plead with him.
Xavier cast his eyes up to the ceiling, and a small peace, the only kind he could grant himself, came over him.
He knew, most certainly, he would fulfill this last request.
"You did it all." He told Abair out loud. "Everything Important, anyway."
Then, unashamed and swathed in honest emotion, he let the tears roll down his face.
And maybe I can even … forgive you … maybe…