Author's Note: The end of all the fluffiness between Severus (eech!) and
Remus (mmmm) is to be seen. If you are saying right now "What? CRAP! YOU
SUCK! YOU JUST TOLD ME!" then look directly down. Go on, just read the
first line of his entry for today. Now, was it really such a crime? yeah, I
thought so.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN--in 2 days!
DISCLAIMER: Okay, all of these characters and some of the plot is J.K.Rowlings, who IS your god. None of these characters are mine, although I sorely wish Remmie and Sirius were all my own. *smiles evilly* That'd be fun.
Dear Diary,
Well, Severus and I sorta--broke up, I guess you'd say. Today was the last Hogsmeade day of the year and I was busy finding a new monster that I could either find or order. I at last settled on a Shaitan, a demon from the Arabian deserts that can shape-shift into just about anything. Disgustingly enough, their idea of a feast is anything that has heaps of dirt upon them, and often they would devour hands that have not been cleaned before slumber, reducing them to bloody stumps. I suppose I should ask Professor Flitwick about any water charms, since that repels them...
So, going more along the lines of Severus and I...egh...
Well, seeing at today most of the students were gone, I was quite happily working when I heard a sudden shout of anger in my fireplace.
"Lupin!" the fireplace called. I stood up and looked around the empty hearth and heard another shout. "I want a word!" Ah, it was Snape. I shrugged and grabbed some floo powder, sending myself to his office. I stumbled out of the fire and brushed off the ash, deciding at that time that I should wear my old robes. Smart idea, Remus...
"You called, Severus?"
"I certainly did," he replied angrily, striding back to his desk quicky and pointing at a seemingly normal piece of parchment. Then I saw--" I have just asked Potter to empty his pockets. He was carrying this." The Marauder's Map...with our secret spell on it! Oh no...I quickly looked at the writing we bewitched into the map, should Severus ever see it.
"Mr.Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business." Oh dear...I wrote that!!
"Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr.Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git" James had written this....
"Mr.Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor." Sirius...he desperately dispised Snape.
"Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball." Peter, poor Peter...rather witty, however, for his character.
"Well?" he asked impatiently, snapping me out of my gaze. I was suddenly brought into my hurried thoughts of what to say, what to reply with when he spoke once more. "Well?" he asked again. "This parchment is plainly full of Dark Magic. This is supposed to be your area of expertise, Lupin. Where do you imagine Potter got such a thing?" Clearly he was implying about Sirius making the map, and my incompetance as a teacher...He really knew how to hurt a guy.
I quickly looked at Harry, warning him not to say anything. "Full of Dark Magic? Do you really think so, Severus? It looks to me as though it is merely a piece of parchment that insults anybody who reads it. Childish, but surely not dangerous? I imagine Harry got it from a joke shop--"
"Indeed?" Severus said through clenched teeth. He was almost frightening when angry, really. "You think a joke shop could supply him with such a thing? You don't think it more likely that he got it directly from the manufacturers?"
"You mean, by Mr.Wormtail or one of these people?" I said calmly, turning to Harry. "Harry, do you know any of these men?"
"No," responded Harry quite quickly.
"You see, Severus? Looks like a Zonko product to me---"
Suddenly Ron burt into the office, panting and walking up to Severus's desk, clutching his chest. I smiled a bit at the irony of all this.
"I--gave--Harry--that--stuff," Ron panted, choking a bit. "Bought--it..in Zonkos...ages--ago." he at last finished the sentance and almost collapsed to the floor if Harry hadn't walked up to steady him.
"Well!" I said after a moment of silence, clapping my hands together cheerfully. "That seems to clear that up! Severus, I'll take this back shall I?" I reached for the map and rolled it up, sticking it inside my dilapidated robes and turning to Harry and Ron, lowering my voice. "Harry, Ron, come with me, I need a word about my vampire essay--Excuse us, Severus."
I led them to the Entrance Hall before I dared speak to them. Harry dropped his shoulders as I turned to him.
''Professor, I--"
"I don't want to hear explanations," I replied half-angrily. I crouched down after seeing that nobody was there and lowered my voice to barely a whisper. "I happen to know that this map was confiscated by Mr.Filch many years ago." I saw Harry and Ron look at me with renewed surprise. "Yes, I know it's a map. I don't want to know how it fell into your possession. I am, however, astounded that you didn't hand it in. Particularly after what happened last time a student left information about the castle lying around." True, Peter had left the map for everyone who might have been going to Astronomy to see...and one boy, Kevin Grummings (who was rather er- -stout) got caught in the passage to Honeydukes, took them a day to figure out where he was...Luckily they didn't know who wrote the map, but did know it was the map that led him into the tunnel. "And I can't let you have it back, Harry."
Harry seemed to understand. "Why did Snape think I'd got it from the manufacturers?"
"Because.." I thought about the right thing to say...ans came up with it, "because these mapmakers would have wanted to lure you out of the school. They'd think it extremely entertaining."
"Do you know them?" Harry said, impressed.
"We've met," I siad, looking at him more seriously than I ever did, trying to tell him everything I wanted to say, but couldn't. "Don't expect me to cover up for you again, Harry. I cannot make you take Sirius Black seriously." I stopped for a second, about to say 'no pun intended' but I knew that'd take away the effect of what I was trying to say. " But I would have thought what you have heard when the dementors draw near you would have had more of an effect on you. Your parents gave their lives to keep you alive, Harry. A poor way to repay them--gambling their sacrifice for a bag of magic tricks." I straightened up and marched away back to Severus's office. When I had got there Severus was standing at the doorway.
"Severus--"I began.
"'Mr.Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.'?" he said, slapping the doorway furiously and stomping to his fire.
"Severus, that was in school! We were enemies then, remember?'' I tried to console him.
"Uh huh...And what are we now? Lovers? Friends? Collegues? Enemies? Take your pick, although I am quite sure I know the truth," he said coldly.
"Oh, please, Severus! Don't be so--"
"Don't call me ridiculous." He twitched a bit.
"No,but--"
"It just isn't working out is it? Maybe you should go back to your little doggy, help him into the castle once more, Harry would love to see the man who killed his parents. I'm sure he'd love to see the man who he thought was a friend--a mentor, even, betray him."
I sighed. "I am not helping Sirius into the castle, Severus!"
"Get out of here, Lupin. Your very presence disgusts me."
I shook my head and walked out.
"Thanks a whole bunch, Severus." Remus
Dear Diary,
I don't suppose you have any idea how weird I feel. Funny thing is, neither do I. I mean--I do feel rather bad...but at the same time gratified to be away from him, to not feel for him and have my feelings be nothing to him. I know I sound very selfish saying all this...But I just don't know how to say it correctly...
I loved him, yes. I shall admit that. But...I don't know, it just seems he grew tired of me. I really am worthless....a dishonest werewolf full of depressing memories and---Dammit...I am still so angry with myself...for...everything. For betraying Dumbledore so long ago...for allowing myself to still think about Sirius..WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT SIRIUS? Why do I long for his presence--Why? Am I completely hopeless? I...hate myself. I hate everything about me... And yet...I should shut up, sorry Diary. I guess I shall leave you with my signature.
Remus.
Dear Diary,
Today I began the exams--oh dear, I almost forgot. It has been at least a month since last I wrote in you!!! Let me fill you in...
Nothing between Snape and I has become resolved...in fact he's a bit more bitter to me than the beginning of the year. But it's a er--welcome change, I suppose....Anyhow, to get along with matters, Gryffindor has won the Quidditch Cup against Slytherin. I heard it was quite a game--however I was- -er--ill....Let me continue. I was told that Sirius had in fact entered the castle once more...a long time ago, in fact, and tried to murder Ron Weasley! Why would he--maybe he found the wrong boy? Or...Ron did have a rat on him...could it be---No. Shut up, Remus.
Back to the exams--They have gone wonderfully! I brought the test outside, so they could use it on the Red Caps when they got to them. First they had to manuever through a deep pool with a grindylow, move onto rows of Red Cap filled holes, and discover the way out of a marsh whilst being directed by a Hinkypunk, finally ending in a trunk with a boggart I still had from the Patronus lessons. Hermione, quite ironically, did not quite finish. She reached the boggart and it became Professor McGonagall, who told her she had failed every subject. She was sobbing and it took a while to get her back together, but I still gave her full marks, knowing she would have done well even still. After that had happened the next class came, and one girl named Jeanne Hyjinx got lost in the swamp containing the Hinkypunk, took us about an hour to find her...Eh heh.
Remus
HAPPY HALLOWEEN--in 2 days!
DISCLAIMER: Okay, all of these characters and some of the plot is J.K.Rowlings, who IS your god. None of these characters are mine, although I sorely wish Remmie and Sirius were all my own. *smiles evilly* That'd be fun.
Dear Diary,
Well, Severus and I sorta--broke up, I guess you'd say. Today was the last Hogsmeade day of the year and I was busy finding a new monster that I could either find or order. I at last settled on a Shaitan, a demon from the Arabian deserts that can shape-shift into just about anything. Disgustingly enough, their idea of a feast is anything that has heaps of dirt upon them, and often they would devour hands that have not been cleaned before slumber, reducing them to bloody stumps. I suppose I should ask Professor Flitwick about any water charms, since that repels them...
So, going more along the lines of Severus and I...egh...
Well, seeing at today most of the students were gone, I was quite happily working when I heard a sudden shout of anger in my fireplace.
"Lupin!" the fireplace called. I stood up and looked around the empty hearth and heard another shout. "I want a word!" Ah, it was Snape. I shrugged and grabbed some floo powder, sending myself to his office. I stumbled out of the fire and brushed off the ash, deciding at that time that I should wear my old robes. Smart idea, Remus...
"You called, Severus?"
"I certainly did," he replied angrily, striding back to his desk quicky and pointing at a seemingly normal piece of parchment. Then I saw--" I have just asked Potter to empty his pockets. He was carrying this." The Marauder's Map...with our secret spell on it! Oh no...I quickly looked at the writing we bewitched into the map, should Severus ever see it.
"Mr.Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business." Oh dear...I wrote that!!
"Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr.Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git" James had written this....
"Mr.Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor." Sirius...he desperately dispised Snape.
"Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball." Peter, poor Peter...rather witty, however, for his character.
"Well?" he asked impatiently, snapping me out of my gaze. I was suddenly brought into my hurried thoughts of what to say, what to reply with when he spoke once more. "Well?" he asked again. "This parchment is plainly full of Dark Magic. This is supposed to be your area of expertise, Lupin. Where do you imagine Potter got such a thing?" Clearly he was implying about Sirius making the map, and my incompetance as a teacher...He really knew how to hurt a guy.
I quickly looked at Harry, warning him not to say anything. "Full of Dark Magic? Do you really think so, Severus? It looks to me as though it is merely a piece of parchment that insults anybody who reads it. Childish, but surely not dangerous? I imagine Harry got it from a joke shop--"
"Indeed?" Severus said through clenched teeth. He was almost frightening when angry, really. "You think a joke shop could supply him with such a thing? You don't think it more likely that he got it directly from the manufacturers?"
"You mean, by Mr.Wormtail or one of these people?" I said calmly, turning to Harry. "Harry, do you know any of these men?"
"No," responded Harry quite quickly.
"You see, Severus? Looks like a Zonko product to me---"
Suddenly Ron burt into the office, panting and walking up to Severus's desk, clutching his chest. I smiled a bit at the irony of all this.
"I--gave--Harry--that--stuff," Ron panted, choking a bit. "Bought--it..in Zonkos...ages--ago." he at last finished the sentance and almost collapsed to the floor if Harry hadn't walked up to steady him.
"Well!" I said after a moment of silence, clapping my hands together cheerfully. "That seems to clear that up! Severus, I'll take this back shall I?" I reached for the map and rolled it up, sticking it inside my dilapidated robes and turning to Harry and Ron, lowering my voice. "Harry, Ron, come with me, I need a word about my vampire essay--Excuse us, Severus."
I led them to the Entrance Hall before I dared speak to them. Harry dropped his shoulders as I turned to him.
''Professor, I--"
"I don't want to hear explanations," I replied half-angrily. I crouched down after seeing that nobody was there and lowered my voice to barely a whisper. "I happen to know that this map was confiscated by Mr.Filch many years ago." I saw Harry and Ron look at me with renewed surprise. "Yes, I know it's a map. I don't want to know how it fell into your possession. I am, however, astounded that you didn't hand it in. Particularly after what happened last time a student left information about the castle lying around." True, Peter had left the map for everyone who might have been going to Astronomy to see...and one boy, Kevin Grummings (who was rather er- -stout) got caught in the passage to Honeydukes, took them a day to figure out where he was...Luckily they didn't know who wrote the map, but did know it was the map that led him into the tunnel. "And I can't let you have it back, Harry."
Harry seemed to understand. "Why did Snape think I'd got it from the manufacturers?"
"Because.." I thought about the right thing to say...ans came up with it, "because these mapmakers would have wanted to lure you out of the school. They'd think it extremely entertaining."
"Do you know them?" Harry said, impressed.
"We've met," I siad, looking at him more seriously than I ever did, trying to tell him everything I wanted to say, but couldn't. "Don't expect me to cover up for you again, Harry. I cannot make you take Sirius Black seriously." I stopped for a second, about to say 'no pun intended' but I knew that'd take away the effect of what I was trying to say. " But I would have thought what you have heard when the dementors draw near you would have had more of an effect on you. Your parents gave their lives to keep you alive, Harry. A poor way to repay them--gambling their sacrifice for a bag of magic tricks." I straightened up and marched away back to Severus's office. When I had got there Severus was standing at the doorway.
"Severus--"I began.
"'Mr.Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.'?" he said, slapping the doorway furiously and stomping to his fire.
"Severus, that was in school! We were enemies then, remember?'' I tried to console him.
"Uh huh...And what are we now? Lovers? Friends? Collegues? Enemies? Take your pick, although I am quite sure I know the truth," he said coldly.
"Oh, please, Severus! Don't be so--"
"Don't call me ridiculous." He twitched a bit.
"No,but--"
"It just isn't working out is it? Maybe you should go back to your little doggy, help him into the castle once more, Harry would love to see the man who killed his parents. I'm sure he'd love to see the man who he thought was a friend--a mentor, even, betray him."
I sighed. "I am not helping Sirius into the castle, Severus!"
"Get out of here, Lupin. Your very presence disgusts me."
I shook my head and walked out.
"Thanks a whole bunch, Severus." Remus
Dear Diary,
I don't suppose you have any idea how weird I feel. Funny thing is, neither do I. I mean--I do feel rather bad...but at the same time gratified to be away from him, to not feel for him and have my feelings be nothing to him. I know I sound very selfish saying all this...But I just don't know how to say it correctly...
I loved him, yes. I shall admit that. But...I don't know, it just seems he grew tired of me. I really am worthless....a dishonest werewolf full of depressing memories and---Dammit...I am still so angry with myself...for...everything. For betraying Dumbledore so long ago...for allowing myself to still think about Sirius..WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT SIRIUS? Why do I long for his presence--Why? Am I completely hopeless? I...hate myself. I hate everything about me... And yet...I should shut up, sorry Diary. I guess I shall leave you with my signature.
Remus.
Dear Diary,
Today I began the exams--oh dear, I almost forgot. It has been at least a month since last I wrote in you!!! Let me fill you in...
Nothing between Snape and I has become resolved...in fact he's a bit more bitter to me than the beginning of the year. But it's a er--welcome change, I suppose....Anyhow, to get along with matters, Gryffindor has won the Quidditch Cup against Slytherin. I heard it was quite a game--however I was- -er--ill....Let me continue. I was told that Sirius had in fact entered the castle once more...a long time ago, in fact, and tried to murder Ron Weasley! Why would he--maybe he found the wrong boy? Or...Ron did have a rat on him...could it be---No. Shut up, Remus.
Back to the exams--They have gone wonderfully! I brought the test outside, so they could use it on the Red Caps when they got to them. First they had to manuever through a deep pool with a grindylow, move onto rows of Red Cap filled holes, and discover the way out of a marsh whilst being directed by a Hinkypunk, finally ending in a trunk with a boggart I still had from the Patronus lessons. Hermione, quite ironically, did not quite finish. She reached the boggart and it became Professor McGonagall, who told her she had failed every subject. She was sobbing and it took a while to get her back together, but I still gave her full marks, knowing she would have done well even still. After that had happened the next class came, and one girl named Jeanne Hyjinx got lost in the swamp containing the Hinkypunk, took us about an hour to find her...Eh heh.
Remus