Author's Note: This is it, the big Chapter. I might even have to split it
up into two chapters...J.K. Rowling split it into 3. Do you know what I am
talking about? Oh yeah, I have been waiting a while to write this one. For
those of you who haven't read the book and are moving to this chapter
(C'mon, it's a great book, guys!!) note that I mostly quote the dialog and
some of the movements, so this will result in much spoilers. I will try to
keep it so I am not just stating what the book says, so i will put the
normal feelings on everything, my own take on his movements, and thoughts.
I really hope you guys enjoy this, because afterwards I only have one more
chapter to write and then it's bye-bye, Remmie. But I'm gonna continue some
Sirius/Remus stuff in another fic I have already started to write, "Lie low
at Lupin's for awhile". I think you can guess. Well---ENJOY!..even if it
takes you 2 hours!
DISCLAIMER: Okay, all of these characters and some of the plot is J.K.Rowlings, who IS your god. None of these characters are mine, although I sorely wish Remmie and Sirius were all my own. *smiles evilly* That'd be fun.
Dear Diary,
Oh..my...god. There is no word to describe tonight...so I suppose I shall tell of what happened. It might be a bit long...I hope I have enough paper. Well, to get along with it--maybe save some time-- I was in my office looking over the papers I needed to correct before the end of the term. Once I had gotten to near the end of the pile I came across-very fortunately, I might add- the old Marauder's Map. I tapped it with my wand and looked over the grounds in the way that only we could see it, it's full potential. I grinned, looking over the secret passages, the place where we all signed our names, and I finally spotted a small dot labeled Harry Potter, followed by two more dots that were named Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger. I looked closer to see they were walking to Hagrid's hut, most likely to console him over his terrible loss... Twenty minutes later they left the hut and were accompanied by none other than--
A small dot labelled Peter Pettigrew.
I caught my breath as I watched them, slowly moving across the grounds as another dot collided with the miniscule Ron. Sirius Black had caught up with them. He pulled Peter and Ron into the Whomping Willow and then Hermione and Harry followed soon after. I jumped from my seat and ran out of the castle, trying to get to the Whomping Willow. When I had reached the horrific tree I stopped dead and looked around for the knot that you could push and get through unscathed. Once I had gotten in I heard a shout from the floor above me.
"WE'RE UP HERE! WE'RE UP HERE--SIRIUS BLACK--QUICK!!!"
I darted up the stairs and looked around with my wand raised, instantly calling out "Expelliarmus!" and catching the wands I had gotten, and strode into the room, staring intently at Sirius, who had--a cat on him?
"Where is he, Sirius?" I asked, looking at Sirius as he looked back at me with a sunken face...even dirtier than he was when last I saw him. Harry and Ron looked a me like I was crazy. Suddenly a wave of understanding came over me. "But then....why hasn't he shown himself before now? Unless--- unless he was the one..unless you switched...without telling me?
Sirius just nodded.
"Professor--" Harry began as I pulled Padfoot to his feet and embraced the frail skeleton of what to be my dear Sirius. Hermione gasped and I quickly let go.
"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!" Hermione shouted shrilly. "You--you---" Oh shit, she had just figured me out. Well....
"Hermione---"
"--you and him!" she continued. Oh dear, I mean--...Oh, I suppose I can't hide from them that I loved Sirius...
"Hermione, calm down--"
"I didn't tell anyone! I've been covering up for you!"
"Hermione, listen to me, please!" I exclaimed firmly. "I can explain--" Had she caught us in that deserted old room? I thought she'd have told the authorities....But why would she let it out now if she knew?
"I trusted you," Harry screamed, I could hear him shaking, "and all this time you've been his friend!"
"You're wrong. I haven't been Sirius's friend, but I am now--let me explain." Well, I don't think they knew about Sirius and I and our--er-- history--but that means they--
"NO! Harry, don't trust him, he's been helping Black get into the castle, he wants you dead too--he's a werewolf!!!!"
Silence suddenly broke out, I could feel what little color in my skin leave and I bit my lip, chucking mildly. "Not at all up to your usual standard, Hermione. Only one out of the three, I'm afraid. I have not been helping Sirius into the castle, and I certainly do not want Harry dead..." I shivered and gulped. "But I won't deny the fact that I am a werewolf."
I heard a groan of pain as Ron tried to stand back up, but fell back onto the ground rather hardly. I attempted to help him, but...
"Get away from me, werewolf!"
I froze, everything returning to me. Taunts from cousins, schoolmates, and even my parents and grandparents all coming back to haunt me. And now--- ...I understood how he must feel. I am a beast...
"How long have you known?" I replied, turning solemly to Hermione.
"Ages," she said quietly. "Since I did Professor Snape's essay..."
That sorta made me smile morbidly. "He'll be delighted. He assigned that essay hoping someone would realize what my symptoms meant...Did you check the lunar chart and realize that I was always ill at the full moon? or did you realize that the boggart changed into the moon when it saw me?" I asked as coolly as I could, almost mocking my own stupidty at allowing such and easy clue to get into my most prized students, ones as such that I almost considered as friends, or at least great acquaintances. I had lost pretty much all hope now, I was nothing. Soon they'd all know...
"Both," Hermione whispered, looking down a bit. Sirius looked over at me and then down at the floor when I forced a meek laugh. He looked up again.
" You're the cleverest witch of your age I've ever met, Hermione."
"I'm not. If I'd been a bit cleverer, I'd have told everyone what you are!" she said coldly, making me wince a bit.
"But they already know...At least the staff do."
"Dumbledore hired you when he knew you were a werewolf?" gasped Ron from the bed. "Is he mad?"
"Some of the staff thought so. He had to work very hard to convince certain teachers that I'm trustworthy--"
"AND HE WAS WRONG!" shrieked Harry, making me remember he was there, and where I was. "YOU'VE BEEN HELPING HIM ALL THE TIME!" he shouted, pointing at Sirius, who walked to the bed and sat on it, shaking with his face in a hand. I sighed and shook my head. Sirius....
"I have not been helping Sirius. If you'll give me a chance, I'll explain. Look---" I threw back Harry, Hermione, and Ron's wands to their owners and put my own away. 'There, you're armed and we're not. Now will you listen?"
Harry just looked at me with the utmost hatred. "If you haven't been helping him," he shifted his furious eyes to Sirius and then back to me, "how did you know he was here?"
"The map. The Marauder's Map. I was in my office examining it," I replied simply. I then got into the story about it, finally coming to the part where I saw Peter with them. Ron, however, was quite sure that "Scabbers" was indeed only a rat.
"Do you think I could have a look at the rat?" I asked Ron.
"What?" he responded weakly, looking at me with squinted eyes. "What's Scabbers got to do with it?"
"Everything," I half-snorted. "Could I see him please?" Ron sat still for a moment, then slowly dug into his robes and pulled out--who would have guessed it--Wormtail. A slightly anorexic looking rat, his ribs making little ridges in his matted fur as he squeaked madly in Ron's had, his tail and claws thrashing at everything it could get at. Obviously Mr.Wormtail knew the circumstances of the time and place he was at.
"What? What's my rat got to do with anything?!" he reiterated.
"That's not a rat," Sirius interrupted hoarsely.
"What d'you mean--of course he's a rat--" Ron said incredously.
"No, he's not. He's a wizard."
"An Animagus, by the name of Peter Pettigrew," croaked Sirius. I bit my lip, still looking at the rat, trying to make sure that we were, in fact, getting the correct rat. Then I reminded myself of the Map, and I knew it for sure. Everything made sense now, everything seemed to fit into place--
"You're both mental," Ron sneered.
"Ridiculous!" agreed Hermione weakly.
"Peter Pettigrew's dead!! He killed him twelve years ago!" Harry shouted, pointing again at Sirius...whose face convulsed and twitched.
"I meant to, but little Peter got the better of me.." he growled, once again becoming quite like his animal form, a large black dog. He bared his teeth furiously. "Not this time though!!!" Sirius pounced on Ron, trying to get at Wormtail as Ron screamed in excruciating pain as he did so.
"Sirius, NO!" I yelled, trying to get him away from Ron,"WAIT! You can't just do it like that--they need to understand--we've got to explian--"
"We can explain afterwards!" he snarled, still trying to rip at the rat, who had began to squeal even more loudly.
"They've--got--a--right--to--know--everything!" I panted, trying to get him to calm down, underestimating his strength. "Ron's kept him as a pet! There are parts of it even I don't understand! And Harry--You owe Harry the truth, Sirius!!" Once Sirius agreed, I began to tell my story, the beginning of it all. The truth of how it all began...how much it was my fault. I told them about the bite, how Dumbledore conceded to let me into Hogwarts, the terms, my friends, the Animagi-self-lessons, and finally-- Severus.
"Allt his year I have been battling with myself, wondering if I should tell Dumbledore that Sirius was an Animagus. But I didn't do it. Why? Because I was too cowardly. It would have meant admitting that i'd betrayed his trust while I was at school, admitting that I had lead others along with me...and Dumbledore's trust has meant everything to me. He let me into Hogwarts as a boy, and he gave me job when I have been shunned all my adult life, unable to find paid work because of what I am. And so i convinced myself that Sirius was getting into the school using dark arts he learned from Voldemort, that being an Animagus had nothing to do with it...so, in a way, Snape's been right about me all along."
"Snape" Sirius sneered, looking at me and raising his eyebrows half- mockingly and half-suggesting. "What's Snape got to do with it?"
"He's here, Sirius. He's teaching here as well." What, did Sirius think I just found him somewhere and immediately fell in love? No...it was chance that we came together...Definitely not luck. "Professor Snape was at school with us. He fought very hard against my appointment to the Defense Against the Dark Arts job. He has been telling Dumbledore all year that I am not to be trusted. He has his reasons...you see, Sirius here played a trick on him which nearly killed him, a trick which involved me--"
"It served him right," Sirius intervened coldly. "Sneaking around, trying to find out what we were up to...hoping he could get us expelled."
"Severus was very interested in hwhere I went every month. We were in the same year, you know and we--er--didn't like each other very much." I couldn't possibly tell them about Sirius, Severus, and I. No way. "He especially disliked James. Jealous, I think, of James's talent on the Quidditch field...anyway, Snape had seen me crossing the grounds with Madam Pomfrey one evening as she led me toward the Whomping Willow to transform. Sirius thought it'd be--er--amusing, to tell Snape all he had to do was prod the knot on the tree trunk with a long stick and he's be able to get in after me. Well, of course, Snape tried it--if he'd got as far as this house, he'd have met a fully grown werewolf--but your gather, who'd heard what Sirius had done, went after Snape and pulld him back, at a great risk to his life...Snape glimpsed me, though, at the end of the tunnel. He was forbidden by Dumbledore to tell anybody, but from that time on he knew what I was..."
"So that's why Snape doesn't like you," Harry said, understanding at last. "Because he thought you were in on the joke?''
"That's right," a cold voice said, making me jump and turn around to see Severus Snape pull off an Invisibility Cloak and point his wand at me. Sirius jumped to his feet and was eyeing possible places for daggers on Snape's body.
"I found this at the base of the Whomping Willow," Snape said, tossing aside the cloak, still smirking and keeping the wand steady at my chest. 'Very useful, Potter, I thank you...You're wondering, perhaps, how I knew you were here? I've just been to your office, Lupin. You forgot to take your potion tonight, so I took a gobletful along. And very lucky I did... lucky for me, I mean. Lying on your desk was a certain map. One glance at it told me all I needed to know. I saw you running along this passageway and out of sight."
My heart dropped. I had forgot to wipe the map clean in my hurry to come to the tree, fool that I am. But if he had seen the map...wouldn't he have caught the dot labelled "Peter Pettigrew"?
"Severus--"I began.
"I've told the headmaster again and again that you're helping your old friend Black into the castle, Lupin, and here's the proof," Severus said, every now and then emphasizing his point by poking my chest with his wand. "Not even I dreamed you would have the nerve to use this old place as your hideout--"
"Severus, you're making a mistake," I replied, trying to reason with him. "You haven't heard everything--I can explain--Sirius is not here to kill Harry--"
"Two more for Azkaban tonight," he responded madly, his eyes gleaming. I lost my breath at the words, he'd send Sirius back to the Dementors.... "I shall be interested to see how Dumbledore takes this...he was quite convinced you were harmless, you know, Lupin...a tame werewolf--"
"You fool. Is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban?" I asked softly of him, but to no avail did my response come. An instant later his face twitched with fury and cords wrapped themselves around me, causing me to fall and lose all hearing of what happened. So...I suppose I'll move on to what I could see. From what I percepted Sirius was pretty upset, charged at Snape, who in turn raised his wand at Sirius's head, telling him to stop or he'd hex him. Hermione began to attempt reasoning with him, but to no avail, for Severus apparently began screaming at them wih a deranged look on his face. He then whispered to Sirius and they talked half-calmly for a while until Harry began to speak, at which point Severus went back to his insane look---shrieking at them loud enough for me to barely make out the words. A millisecond later he was blasted against the wall, Harry, Ron, and Hermione had disarmed him. Padfoot said something and then stooped down to untie me.
"Thank you, Harry," I mumbled.
"I'm still not saying I believe you," Harry replied, making me turn from trying to ge the dust off my already messed up robes.
"Then it's time we offered you some proof," I said impatiently. "You, boy-- give me Peter please. Now."
Ron looked at me and then at his rat, holding protectively to his chest. "Come off it. Are you trying to say the broke out of Azkaban just to get his hands on Scabbers? I mean...Okay, say Pettigrew could turn into a rat-- there are millions of rats--how's he supposed to know which one he's after if he's locked up in Azkaban?"
I turned to Sirius, a frown coming over my face. "You know, Sirius, that's a fair question. How did you find out where he was?" Sirius reached into his robes, which were even filthier and more tattered than my own, and took out a piece of paper which was balled up. He unfolded it and smoothed in on his leg, then held it out for all of us to see. It was a photo of the Weasley family with "Scabbers" on Ron's shoulder. I held my breath. "How did you get this?"
"Fudge," Sirius replied simply. "When he came to inspect Azkaban last year, he gave me his paper. And there was Peter, on the front page..on this boy's shoulder...I knew him at once.how many times had I seen him transform? And the caption said the boy would be going back to Hogwarts...to where Harry was..."
The whole while he had been talking I was examining Scabbers in the picture and in Ron's hands. I was sure more than ever that we were doing the right thing now. We had to explain to Ron, Harry, and Hermione why it was true, but they didn't quite believe us yet. Instead Harry went on that Sirius had indeed killed James and Lily, saying something along the lines of--
"THAT'S NOT TRUE! HE WAS THEIR SECRET-KEEPER! hE SAID SO BEFORE YOU TURNED UP. HE SAID HE KILLED THEM!" he bellowed, pointing at Sirius once again. Sirius began so shake.
"Harry...I as good as killed them. i persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter at the last moment, persuaded them to use him as Secret-Keeper instead of me...I'm to blame, I know it. The night they died, I'd arranged to check on Pete, make sure he was still safe, but when I arrived at his hiding place, he'd gone. Yet there was no sign of a struggle. It didn't feel right. I was scared. I set out for your parents' house straight away. And when I saw their house, destroyed, and their bodies...I realized what Peter must've done...what I'd done..." Sirius stopped and turned away, I could see a tear flow down his sunken face and that pretty much did it for me.
"Enough of this, there's one certain was to prove what really happened. Ron, give me that rat."
"What are you going to do if I give him to you?" Ron asked me, looking down at Wormtail and then back at me uncertainly.
"Force him to show himself. If he really is a rat, it wont hurt him," I replied, a bit softer this time. Ron hesitated for a minute or two, then held out "Scabbers" and I took him rather hastily as the rat squeaked madly. "Ready, Sirius?" I asked as he grabbed Snape's wand and crept up to me.
"Together?"
"I think so...On the count of three. One--two--THREE!" We performed the spell and he flew into the air, writhing and twisting around, and then he fell to the ground. A flash of light and the he slowly transformed into that disgusting little maggot better known as Peter Pettigrew. He was around 5'5, balding with thin, white hair around his crown, grubby skin that was a bit stretchy--since obviously he had lost a lot of weight, his barely colored pale blue eyes watering as he looked around at all of us, breathing quickly as if he had--oh, yeah, he did have asthma.
"Well, hello, Peter. Long time, no see," I said, smiling pleasantly, although it was fake.
"S-Sirius...R-Remus..." he stuttered, not a change in his voice from last I heard him, although it was a little less self-confident. I couldn't help noticing his eyes following the floorboards to the doors and windows and then back to us as he wrung his hands. "My friends...my old friends..."
Sirius's hand went immediately up, but I saw it and grabbed his wrist, looked at him as if to say 'Just hold on...' and then turned back to Peter. "We've been having a little chat, Peter, about what happened the night Lily and James died. You might have missed the finer points while you were around down there squeaking on the bed--"
"Remus! You don't believe him, do you...? He tried to kill me, Remus..." Wormtail exclaimed weakly, making me wonder how he could be so "innocent" if he already knows that Sirius would tell me that he's the one....How interesting, Peter! You're digging your own grave!
"So we've heard," I replied bitterly. "I'd like to clear up one or two little matters with you, Peter, if you'd be so--"
"He's come to try and kill me again!" he shouted shrilly, pointing at Sirius...everyone does that, huh? "He killed Lily and James and now he's going to kill me too...You've got to help me, Remus..."
We continued on like this for quite a while---I don't quite need to write it, since it was mostly Peter telling us how Sirius is out to kill him and we justified the imbecility of that comment, tried to tell Harry the truth. It was only when Sirius came upon the topic of how he escaped that we reached the point where Harry accepted it.
"Believe me," half-whimpered Padfoot. "Believe me, Harry. I never betrayed Lily and James. I would have died before I betrayed them." Harry hesitated and looked hard at Sirius for a while, then slowly, he nodded.
"No!!!" Peter screeched. He crumpled to hisknees and began to dry-sob. He perked up from his pathetic state as if an idea struck him, and scuttled on his knees over to Sirius. 'Sirius--it's me...it's Peter...your friend..you wouldn't..." Sirius cut him short by kicking out and sending Peter back from him, still grovelling.
"There's enough filth on my robes without you touching them," he snarled.
"Remus!" he squeaked, turning to me and looking straight into my eyes with his small yet bulging pale ones. "You don't believe this...wouldn't Sirius have told you they'd changed the plan?"
"Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter. I assume that's why you didn't tell me, Sirius?" I asked lightly over Peter.
"Forgive me, Remus."
"Not at all, Padfoot, old friend," I smiled, rolling up my sleeves. "And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?"
"Of course," Sirius said, grinning a bit, rolling up his sleeves as well. "Shall we kill him together?"
Oh dear...I am running out of paper--Long story short, Peter attempted to "reason" with all of us, and when he'd found out that there was no hope, we raised our wand to kill him--Sirius and I--but Harry stopped us...We agreed, because it was not our choice-but Harry's. We brgan to walk up to the castle and....I turned into a werewolf. Sirius was able to avert me from the students but...Peter got away...It's the morning right now....I think I'm going to resign....
Remus
DISCLAIMER: Okay, all of these characters and some of the plot is J.K.Rowlings, who IS your god. None of these characters are mine, although I sorely wish Remmie and Sirius were all my own. *smiles evilly* That'd be fun.
Dear Diary,
Oh..my...god. There is no word to describe tonight...so I suppose I shall tell of what happened. It might be a bit long...I hope I have enough paper. Well, to get along with it--maybe save some time-- I was in my office looking over the papers I needed to correct before the end of the term. Once I had gotten to near the end of the pile I came across-very fortunately, I might add- the old Marauder's Map. I tapped it with my wand and looked over the grounds in the way that only we could see it, it's full potential. I grinned, looking over the secret passages, the place where we all signed our names, and I finally spotted a small dot labeled Harry Potter, followed by two more dots that were named Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger. I looked closer to see they were walking to Hagrid's hut, most likely to console him over his terrible loss... Twenty minutes later they left the hut and were accompanied by none other than--
A small dot labelled Peter Pettigrew.
I caught my breath as I watched them, slowly moving across the grounds as another dot collided with the miniscule Ron. Sirius Black had caught up with them. He pulled Peter and Ron into the Whomping Willow and then Hermione and Harry followed soon after. I jumped from my seat and ran out of the castle, trying to get to the Whomping Willow. When I had reached the horrific tree I stopped dead and looked around for the knot that you could push and get through unscathed. Once I had gotten in I heard a shout from the floor above me.
"WE'RE UP HERE! WE'RE UP HERE--SIRIUS BLACK--QUICK!!!"
I darted up the stairs and looked around with my wand raised, instantly calling out "Expelliarmus!" and catching the wands I had gotten, and strode into the room, staring intently at Sirius, who had--a cat on him?
"Where is he, Sirius?" I asked, looking at Sirius as he looked back at me with a sunken face...even dirtier than he was when last I saw him. Harry and Ron looked a me like I was crazy. Suddenly a wave of understanding came over me. "But then....why hasn't he shown himself before now? Unless--- unless he was the one..unless you switched...without telling me?
Sirius just nodded.
"Professor--" Harry began as I pulled Padfoot to his feet and embraced the frail skeleton of what to be my dear Sirius. Hermione gasped and I quickly let go.
"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!" Hermione shouted shrilly. "You--you---" Oh shit, she had just figured me out. Well....
"Hermione---"
"--you and him!" she continued. Oh dear, I mean--...Oh, I suppose I can't hide from them that I loved Sirius...
"Hermione, calm down--"
"I didn't tell anyone! I've been covering up for you!"
"Hermione, listen to me, please!" I exclaimed firmly. "I can explain--" Had she caught us in that deserted old room? I thought she'd have told the authorities....But why would she let it out now if she knew?
"I trusted you," Harry screamed, I could hear him shaking, "and all this time you've been his friend!"
"You're wrong. I haven't been Sirius's friend, but I am now--let me explain." Well, I don't think they knew about Sirius and I and our--er-- history--but that means they--
"NO! Harry, don't trust him, he's been helping Black get into the castle, he wants you dead too--he's a werewolf!!!!"
Silence suddenly broke out, I could feel what little color in my skin leave and I bit my lip, chucking mildly. "Not at all up to your usual standard, Hermione. Only one out of the three, I'm afraid. I have not been helping Sirius into the castle, and I certainly do not want Harry dead..." I shivered and gulped. "But I won't deny the fact that I am a werewolf."
I heard a groan of pain as Ron tried to stand back up, but fell back onto the ground rather hardly. I attempted to help him, but...
"Get away from me, werewolf!"
I froze, everything returning to me. Taunts from cousins, schoolmates, and even my parents and grandparents all coming back to haunt me. And now--- ...I understood how he must feel. I am a beast...
"How long have you known?" I replied, turning solemly to Hermione.
"Ages," she said quietly. "Since I did Professor Snape's essay..."
That sorta made me smile morbidly. "He'll be delighted. He assigned that essay hoping someone would realize what my symptoms meant...Did you check the lunar chart and realize that I was always ill at the full moon? or did you realize that the boggart changed into the moon when it saw me?" I asked as coolly as I could, almost mocking my own stupidty at allowing such and easy clue to get into my most prized students, ones as such that I almost considered as friends, or at least great acquaintances. I had lost pretty much all hope now, I was nothing. Soon they'd all know...
"Both," Hermione whispered, looking down a bit. Sirius looked over at me and then down at the floor when I forced a meek laugh. He looked up again.
" You're the cleverest witch of your age I've ever met, Hermione."
"I'm not. If I'd been a bit cleverer, I'd have told everyone what you are!" she said coldly, making me wince a bit.
"But they already know...At least the staff do."
"Dumbledore hired you when he knew you were a werewolf?" gasped Ron from the bed. "Is he mad?"
"Some of the staff thought so. He had to work very hard to convince certain teachers that I'm trustworthy--"
"AND HE WAS WRONG!" shrieked Harry, making me remember he was there, and where I was. "YOU'VE BEEN HELPING HIM ALL THE TIME!" he shouted, pointing at Sirius, who walked to the bed and sat on it, shaking with his face in a hand. I sighed and shook my head. Sirius....
"I have not been helping Sirius. If you'll give me a chance, I'll explain. Look---" I threw back Harry, Hermione, and Ron's wands to their owners and put my own away. 'There, you're armed and we're not. Now will you listen?"
Harry just looked at me with the utmost hatred. "If you haven't been helping him," he shifted his furious eyes to Sirius and then back to me, "how did you know he was here?"
"The map. The Marauder's Map. I was in my office examining it," I replied simply. I then got into the story about it, finally coming to the part where I saw Peter with them. Ron, however, was quite sure that "Scabbers" was indeed only a rat.
"Do you think I could have a look at the rat?" I asked Ron.
"What?" he responded weakly, looking at me with squinted eyes. "What's Scabbers got to do with it?"
"Everything," I half-snorted. "Could I see him please?" Ron sat still for a moment, then slowly dug into his robes and pulled out--who would have guessed it--Wormtail. A slightly anorexic looking rat, his ribs making little ridges in his matted fur as he squeaked madly in Ron's had, his tail and claws thrashing at everything it could get at. Obviously Mr.Wormtail knew the circumstances of the time and place he was at.
"What? What's my rat got to do with anything?!" he reiterated.
"That's not a rat," Sirius interrupted hoarsely.
"What d'you mean--of course he's a rat--" Ron said incredously.
"No, he's not. He's a wizard."
"An Animagus, by the name of Peter Pettigrew," croaked Sirius. I bit my lip, still looking at the rat, trying to make sure that we were, in fact, getting the correct rat. Then I reminded myself of the Map, and I knew it for sure. Everything made sense now, everything seemed to fit into place--
"You're both mental," Ron sneered.
"Ridiculous!" agreed Hermione weakly.
"Peter Pettigrew's dead!! He killed him twelve years ago!" Harry shouted, pointing again at Sirius...whose face convulsed and twitched.
"I meant to, but little Peter got the better of me.." he growled, once again becoming quite like his animal form, a large black dog. He bared his teeth furiously. "Not this time though!!!" Sirius pounced on Ron, trying to get at Wormtail as Ron screamed in excruciating pain as he did so.
"Sirius, NO!" I yelled, trying to get him away from Ron,"WAIT! You can't just do it like that--they need to understand--we've got to explian--"
"We can explain afterwards!" he snarled, still trying to rip at the rat, who had began to squeal even more loudly.
"They've--got--a--right--to--know--everything!" I panted, trying to get him to calm down, underestimating his strength. "Ron's kept him as a pet! There are parts of it even I don't understand! And Harry--You owe Harry the truth, Sirius!!" Once Sirius agreed, I began to tell my story, the beginning of it all. The truth of how it all began...how much it was my fault. I told them about the bite, how Dumbledore conceded to let me into Hogwarts, the terms, my friends, the Animagi-self-lessons, and finally-- Severus.
"Allt his year I have been battling with myself, wondering if I should tell Dumbledore that Sirius was an Animagus. But I didn't do it. Why? Because I was too cowardly. It would have meant admitting that i'd betrayed his trust while I was at school, admitting that I had lead others along with me...and Dumbledore's trust has meant everything to me. He let me into Hogwarts as a boy, and he gave me job when I have been shunned all my adult life, unable to find paid work because of what I am. And so i convinced myself that Sirius was getting into the school using dark arts he learned from Voldemort, that being an Animagus had nothing to do with it...so, in a way, Snape's been right about me all along."
"Snape" Sirius sneered, looking at me and raising his eyebrows half- mockingly and half-suggesting. "What's Snape got to do with it?"
"He's here, Sirius. He's teaching here as well." What, did Sirius think I just found him somewhere and immediately fell in love? No...it was chance that we came together...Definitely not luck. "Professor Snape was at school with us. He fought very hard against my appointment to the Defense Against the Dark Arts job. He has been telling Dumbledore all year that I am not to be trusted. He has his reasons...you see, Sirius here played a trick on him which nearly killed him, a trick which involved me--"
"It served him right," Sirius intervened coldly. "Sneaking around, trying to find out what we were up to...hoping he could get us expelled."
"Severus was very interested in hwhere I went every month. We were in the same year, you know and we--er--didn't like each other very much." I couldn't possibly tell them about Sirius, Severus, and I. No way. "He especially disliked James. Jealous, I think, of James's talent on the Quidditch field...anyway, Snape had seen me crossing the grounds with Madam Pomfrey one evening as she led me toward the Whomping Willow to transform. Sirius thought it'd be--er--amusing, to tell Snape all he had to do was prod the knot on the tree trunk with a long stick and he's be able to get in after me. Well, of course, Snape tried it--if he'd got as far as this house, he'd have met a fully grown werewolf--but your gather, who'd heard what Sirius had done, went after Snape and pulld him back, at a great risk to his life...Snape glimpsed me, though, at the end of the tunnel. He was forbidden by Dumbledore to tell anybody, but from that time on he knew what I was..."
"So that's why Snape doesn't like you," Harry said, understanding at last. "Because he thought you were in on the joke?''
"That's right," a cold voice said, making me jump and turn around to see Severus Snape pull off an Invisibility Cloak and point his wand at me. Sirius jumped to his feet and was eyeing possible places for daggers on Snape's body.
"I found this at the base of the Whomping Willow," Snape said, tossing aside the cloak, still smirking and keeping the wand steady at my chest. 'Very useful, Potter, I thank you...You're wondering, perhaps, how I knew you were here? I've just been to your office, Lupin. You forgot to take your potion tonight, so I took a gobletful along. And very lucky I did... lucky for me, I mean. Lying on your desk was a certain map. One glance at it told me all I needed to know. I saw you running along this passageway and out of sight."
My heart dropped. I had forgot to wipe the map clean in my hurry to come to the tree, fool that I am. But if he had seen the map...wouldn't he have caught the dot labelled "Peter Pettigrew"?
"Severus--"I began.
"I've told the headmaster again and again that you're helping your old friend Black into the castle, Lupin, and here's the proof," Severus said, every now and then emphasizing his point by poking my chest with his wand. "Not even I dreamed you would have the nerve to use this old place as your hideout--"
"Severus, you're making a mistake," I replied, trying to reason with him. "You haven't heard everything--I can explain--Sirius is not here to kill Harry--"
"Two more for Azkaban tonight," he responded madly, his eyes gleaming. I lost my breath at the words, he'd send Sirius back to the Dementors.... "I shall be interested to see how Dumbledore takes this...he was quite convinced you were harmless, you know, Lupin...a tame werewolf--"
"You fool. Is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban?" I asked softly of him, but to no avail did my response come. An instant later his face twitched with fury and cords wrapped themselves around me, causing me to fall and lose all hearing of what happened. So...I suppose I'll move on to what I could see. From what I percepted Sirius was pretty upset, charged at Snape, who in turn raised his wand at Sirius's head, telling him to stop or he'd hex him. Hermione began to attempt reasoning with him, but to no avail, for Severus apparently began screaming at them wih a deranged look on his face. He then whispered to Sirius and they talked half-calmly for a while until Harry began to speak, at which point Severus went back to his insane look---shrieking at them loud enough for me to barely make out the words. A millisecond later he was blasted against the wall, Harry, Ron, and Hermione had disarmed him. Padfoot said something and then stooped down to untie me.
"Thank you, Harry," I mumbled.
"I'm still not saying I believe you," Harry replied, making me turn from trying to ge the dust off my already messed up robes.
"Then it's time we offered you some proof," I said impatiently. "You, boy-- give me Peter please. Now."
Ron looked at me and then at his rat, holding protectively to his chest. "Come off it. Are you trying to say the broke out of Azkaban just to get his hands on Scabbers? I mean...Okay, say Pettigrew could turn into a rat-- there are millions of rats--how's he supposed to know which one he's after if he's locked up in Azkaban?"
I turned to Sirius, a frown coming over my face. "You know, Sirius, that's a fair question. How did you find out where he was?" Sirius reached into his robes, which were even filthier and more tattered than my own, and took out a piece of paper which was balled up. He unfolded it and smoothed in on his leg, then held it out for all of us to see. It was a photo of the Weasley family with "Scabbers" on Ron's shoulder. I held my breath. "How did you get this?"
"Fudge," Sirius replied simply. "When he came to inspect Azkaban last year, he gave me his paper. And there was Peter, on the front page..on this boy's shoulder...I knew him at once.how many times had I seen him transform? And the caption said the boy would be going back to Hogwarts...to where Harry was..."
The whole while he had been talking I was examining Scabbers in the picture and in Ron's hands. I was sure more than ever that we were doing the right thing now. We had to explain to Ron, Harry, and Hermione why it was true, but they didn't quite believe us yet. Instead Harry went on that Sirius had indeed killed James and Lily, saying something along the lines of--
"THAT'S NOT TRUE! HE WAS THEIR SECRET-KEEPER! hE SAID SO BEFORE YOU TURNED UP. HE SAID HE KILLED THEM!" he bellowed, pointing at Sirius once again. Sirius began so shake.
"Harry...I as good as killed them. i persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter at the last moment, persuaded them to use him as Secret-Keeper instead of me...I'm to blame, I know it. The night they died, I'd arranged to check on Pete, make sure he was still safe, but when I arrived at his hiding place, he'd gone. Yet there was no sign of a struggle. It didn't feel right. I was scared. I set out for your parents' house straight away. And when I saw their house, destroyed, and their bodies...I realized what Peter must've done...what I'd done..." Sirius stopped and turned away, I could see a tear flow down his sunken face and that pretty much did it for me.
"Enough of this, there's one certain was to prove what really happened. Ron, give me that rat."
"What are you going to do if I give him to you?" Ron asked me, looking down at Wormtail and then back at me uncertainly.
"Force him to show himself. If he really is a rat, it wont hurt him," I replied, a bit softer this time. Ron hesitated for a minute or two, then held out "Scabbers" and I took him rather hastily as the rat squeaked madly. "Ready, Sirius?" I asked as he grabbed Snape's wand and crept up to me.
"Together?"
"I think so...On the count of three. One--two--THREE!" We performed the spell and he flew into the air, writhing and twisting around, and then he fell to the ground. A flash of light and the he slowly transformed into that disgusting little maggot better known as Peter Pettigrew. He was around 5'5, balding with thin, white hair around his crown, grubby skin that was a bit stretchy--since obviously he had lost a lot of weight, his barely colored pale blue eyes watering as he looked around at all of us, breathing quickly as if he had--oh, yeah, he did have asthma.
"Well, hello, Peter. Long time, no see," I said, smiling pleasantly, although it was fake.
"S-Sirius...R-Remus..." he stuttered, not a change in his voice from last I heard him, although it was a little less self-confident. I couldn't help noticing his eyes following the floorboards to the doors and windows and then back to us as he wrung his hands. "My friends...my old friends..."
Sirius's hand went immediately up, but I saw it and grabbed his wrist, looked at him as if to say 'Just hold on...' and then turned back to Peter. "We've been having a little chat, Peter, about what happened the night Lily and James died. You might have missed the finer points while you were around down there squeaking on the bed--"
"Remus! You don't believe him, do you...? He tried to kill me, Remus..." Wormtail exclaimed weakly, making me wonder how he could be so "innocent" if he already knows that Sirius would tell me that he's the one....How interesting, Peter! You're digging your own grave!
"So we've heard," I replied bitterly. "I'd like to clear up one or two little matters with you, Peter, if you'd be so--"
"He's come to try and kill me again!" he shouted shrilly, pointing at Sirius...everyone does that, huh? "He killed Lily and James and now he's going to kill me too...You've got to help me, Remus..."
We continued on like this for quite a while---I don't quite need to write it, since it was mostly Peter telling us how Sirius is out to kill him and we justified the imbecility of that comment, tried to tell Harry the truth. It was only when Sirius came upon the topic of how he escaped that we reached the point where Harry accepted it.
"Believe me," half-whimpered Padfoot. "Believe me, Harry. I never betrayed Lily and James. I would have died before I betrayed them." Harry hesitated and looked hard at Sirius for a while, then slowly, he nodded.
"No!!!" Peter screeched. He crumpled to hisknees and began to dry-sob. He perked up from his pathetic state as if an idea struck him, and scuttled on his knees over to Sirius. 'Sirius--it's me...it's Peter...your friend..you wouldn't..." Sirius cut him short by kicking out and sending Peter back from him, still grovelling.
"There's enough filth on my robes without you touching them," he snarled.
"Remus!" he squeaked, turning to me and looking straight into my eyes with his small yet bulging pale ones. "You don't believe this...wouldn't Sirius have told you they'd changed the plan?"
"Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter. I assume that's why you didn't tell me, Sirius?" I asked lightly over Peter.
"Forgive me, Remus."
"Not at all, Padfoot, old friend," I smiled, rolling up my sleeves. "And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?"
"Of course," Sirius said, grinning a bit, rolling up his sleeves as well. "Shall we kill him together?"
Oh dear...I am running out of paper--Long story short, Peter attempted to "reason" with all of us, and when he'd found out that there was no hope, we raised our wand to kill him--Sirius and I--but Harry stopped us...We agreed, because it was not our choice-but Harry's. We brgan to walk up to the castle and....I turned into a werewolf. Sirius was able to avert me from the students but...Peter got away...It's the morning right now....I think I'm going to resign....
Remus