Warning-----------------This story contains slash ---- that is homosexual
relationships. The author takes no responsibility for offence taken. YOU
HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Disclaimer----------------all characters belong to the goddess J.K.Rowling. This is a non-profit work of fanfiction purely written for the purposes enjoyment.
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you'll never know, dear
just how much I loved you
you'll probably think this was
just my big excuse
- ani di franco
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------
My room is devastatingly empty when I return. I lower myself to the bed and stare listlessly at the ceiling.
There are huge holes in my mind I am struggling to fill with logic. None of today seems to connect in any realistic way, and that is frightening. I have a sense of losing the grip on my own life.
I have never been so ashamed of my own brutality. But then, I have never before stared it directly in the face. I can't stop seeing Weasley's disfigured features.
And then the Old Man and his sidekick Hero Boy fly in to save the day. There must have been something in it for them.
Why can't they just leave me alone?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------
Somebody is knocking on my door.
I groan and roll over. When did I fall asleep? My head feels as though it has been filled with cotton wool.
Knock, knock. Knock, knock, knock.
"Fuck off," I moan into my pillow. Let me sleep...
"Malfoy," I hear. "Malfoy, open the door." There is a metallic jingle of keys, and the lock clicks.
"Bloody hell..." I sit up just in time to see Cho Chang swing the door open. Behind her, Snape lurks in the shadows holding his keys. Stupid git let her in.
"Prefect's meeting, Teacher's Common Room, right now," she orders. I blink stupidly.
"They had to send the Head Girl just for that?"
"Now, Malfoy!" she barks, and disappears through the door again.
I glance up at the clock as I am pulling my boots on. 4:30 am! What the fuck do they want now?
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The corridors are empty and silent, and so cold I have difficulty lifting my legs. Snape marches ahead of me, cloak streaming, like some kind of Grim Reaper. His strides are so huge that even my long legs have to trot to keep up. My mind is blurred with the early morning wake up and I'm having trouble remembering where I'm going, or why, or who I am. Maybe this is my sanction for yesterday's incident. Snape was always one for cruel and unusual punishment.
Snape halts so suddenly I can hear his boots squeak against the floor. Pulling out his Master keys, he fiddles with the door handle for a moment before it slides open. A warm glow spills out of the room and spreads its heat across my cheeks as I step inside and close the door behind me.
The Common Room is lit with the homely glow of its fireplace and someone has conjured a circle of deep armchairs close to its warmth. Seated already is the Headmaster with the Heads of Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, and Hufflepuff, next to which is the Head Boy and Girl, and finally the seven other Prefects. Snape moves to sit with the teachers as I take the final armchair, wondering briefly if I can get away with a discreet nap.
"Thank you all for attending," Dumbledore says without preamble. Oh no, sir, thank you for making me. "As you are all aware, we have been in close contact with the Ministry of Magic over the past few months..."
My eyes are drawn around the room to the two Gryffindor Prefects. Granger is staring at Dumbledore with rapt attention, as if he holds the secrets to the world in his words, but Potter looks as though he is about to go back to sleep. His head sags on his chest, his hair falling forward to cover his scar.
McGonagall is standing to speak now. Dumbledore's pliant right-hand puppet. I try to tune out her rambling.
"Last night, there was a major attack on the Ministry, and..."
My head jerks up - this is it, this is what they've been waiting for. The Dark Lord's made his first move.
"In light of the situation, the school will be closed indefinitely..."
There is a collective gasp from the students; this aspect was unexpected.
"All students will have the option of remaining or leaving for the time being, and all parents will be informed..."
My stomach sinks.
"The rest of the school will be informed at this morning's breakfast," McGonagall finishes.
The room is suffocated in a heavy silence. Slowly, Justin Finch-Fletchley lifts his head.
"Why have you told us first?" he asks, speaking for all of the students.
"Those of you here who choose to stay," Dumbledore replies, "will be fundamental to the preparation of Hogwarts defenses and daily functioning. It is vital that the inner group of the school's administration, that is all of you here, be informed of developments every step of the way if we are to hold together."
Potter's pale face is staring at me from across the room. Those of us that choose to stay. Those of us that have a choice.
Disclaimer----------------all characters belong to the goddess J.K.Rowling. This is a non-profit work of fanfiction purely written for the purposes enjoyment.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------
you'll never know, dear
just how much I loved you
you'll probably think this was
just my big excuse
- ani di franco
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------
My room is devastatingly empty when I return. I lower myself to the bed and stare listlessly at the ceiling.
There are huge holes in my mind I am struggling to fill with logic. None of today seems to connect in any realistic way, and that is frightening. I have a sense of losing the grip on my own life.
I have never been so ashamed of my own brutality. But then, I have never before stared it directly in the face. I can't stop seeing Weasley's disfigured features.
And then the Old Man and his sidekick Hero Boy fly in to save the day. There must have been something in it for them.
Why can't they just leave me alone?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------
Somebody is knocking on my door.
I groan and roll over. When did I fall asleep? My head feels as though it has been filled with cotton wool.
Knock, knock. Knock, knock, knock.
"Fuck off," I moan into my pillow. Let me sleep...
"Malfoy," I hear. "Malfoy, open the door." There is a metallic jingle of keys, and the lock clicks.
"Bloody hell..." I sit up just in time to see Cho Chang swing the door open. Behind her, Snape lurks in the shadows holding his keys. Stupid git let her in.
"Prefect's meeting, Teacher's Common Room, right now," she orders. I blink stupidly.
"They had to send the Head Girl just for that?"
"Now, Malfoy!" she barks, and disappears through the door again.
I glance up at the clock as I am pulling my boots on. 4:30 am! What the fuck do they want now?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------
The corridors are empty and silent, and so cold I have difficulty lifting my legs. Snape marches ahead of me, cloak streaming, like some kind of Grim Reaper. His strides are so huge that even my long legs have to trot to keep up. My mind is blurred with the early morning wake up and I'm having trouble remembering where I'm going, or why, or who I am. Maybe this is my sanction for yesterday's incident. Snape was always one for cruel and unusual punishment.
Snape halts so suddenly I can hear his boots squeak against the floor. Pulling out his Master keys, he fiddles with the door handle for a moment before it slides open. A warm glow spills out of the room and spreads its heat across my cheeks as I step inside and close the door behind me.
The Common Room is lit with the homely glow of its fireplace and someone has conjured a circle of deep armchairs close to its warmth. Seated already is the Headmaster with the Heads of Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, and Hufflepuff, next to which is the Head Boy and Girl, and finally the seven other Prefects. Snape moves to sit with the teachers as I take the final armchair, wondering briefly if I can get away with a discreet nap.
"Thank you all for attending," Dumbledore says without preamble. Oh no, sir, thank you for making me. "As you are all aware, we have been in close contact with the Ministry of Magic over the past few months..."
My eyes are drawn around the room to the two Gryffindor Prefects. Granger is staring at Dumbledore with rapt attention, as if he holds the secrets to the world in his words, but Potter looks as though he is about to go back to sleep. His head sags on his chest, his hair falling forward to cover his scar.
McGonagall is standing to speak now. Dumbledore's pliant right-hand puppet. I try to tune out her rambling.
"Last night, there was a major attack on the Ministry, and..."
My head jerks up - this is it, this is what they've been waiting for. The Dark Lord's made his first move.
"In light of the situation, the school will be closed indefinitely..."
There is a collective gasp from the students; this aspect was unexpected.
"All students will have the option of remaining or leaving for the time being, and all parents will be informed..."
My stomach sinks.
"The rest of the school will be informed at this morning's breakfast," McGonagall finishes.
The room is suffocated in a heavy silence. Slowly, Justin Finch-Fletchley lifts his head.
"Why have you told us first?" he asks, speaking for all of the students.
"Those of you here who choose to stay," Dumbledore replies, "will be fundamental to the preparation of Hogwarts defenses and daily functioning. It is vital that the inner group of the school's administration, that is all of you here, be informed of developments every step of the way if we are to hold together."
Potter's pale face is staring at me from across the room. Those of us that choose to stay. Those of us that have a choice.