LEGAL DISCLAIMER: I must admit that, despite all my efforts, I do not own
the anime portrayed here. Maybe next year.
NON-LEGAL STUFF: You thought it would never happen, but I'm back. You thought it was safe it read ff.net. and you were pretty much right. After all, what am I going to do? Anyway, here is Shadow-Fox's backup request: Kuwabara versus Yami Bakura. Why my spell checker thinks "kawakawa" is preferable to Kuwabara, I will never know. Ack, tangent! Here we have the only hero in Yu Yu Hakusho to lose a fight (unless you count Poltergeist Report, in which case he was initially the only guy to win, but he was paired against a worthless waste of space, so I won't count it), fighting against an ancient and immortal spirit with aspirations of world conquest, also currently employed as S-F's muse. One has a sword made of pure spiritual energy; the other has a ring and a deck of trading cards. It doesn't sound very balanced when you put it like that, does it? Still, should be interesting, let's see how it turns out:
In the city of Domino, home to the best Magic and Wizards/Duel Monsters players in the world, a certain Kuwabara Kazuma wandered around, completely out of place. "Just what the hell am I doing here?" he said to nobody in particular. He walked past a bunch of kids excitedly opening packs of cards, paused to remark about what losers thy were, and continued walking. "Damn Urameshi. sticking me with this dumb job. 'Oh, Keiko wants Yugi Mutou's autograph, go get it for me, Kuwabara.' What the hell was I thinking, saying yes? Hmm. maybe I was drunk." Suddenly aware of another presence behind him, he wheeled around to find himself staring at a white- haired, damn near albino youth; only his soft brown eyes prevented him from being labeled as such. "You're looking for Yugi?" he asked. "Why, do you know him? Dude, what just happened to your face?" Kuwabara was staring at the same youth, and yet not. Suddenly seeming older, and definitely much more wicked; Bakura shrugged his shoulders, and glared at the street punk in front of him and said, "I believe that's my line." Enraged, Kuwabara loomed over his now opponent. "You wanna try saying that again!?" he cried.
"Ooh, hostile. good. It'll be more fun this way." Yami Bakura pulsed with the energy of his sennen ring, and everything around them went completely black. "You seem to have a fair amount of power," the dark spirit said, "and I've been rather bored lately. Why don't we play a little game?" With a diabolical grin on his face, he drew his deck out and held it in front of him. "Those things again? What are you gonna do, give me a paper cut?" Kuwabara laughed, but soon stopped as Yami Bakura very calmly selected a card and held it aloft. Glowing softly, it released a monster: a vicious, giant green insect. "Allow me to introduce the Man-eater Bug. We shall see how you fare against it." He casually pointed at Kuwabara, as if bemusedly telling the bug to attack. Kuwabara grinned. "You'll have to do better than that to defeat the great Kuwabara!" Summoning a Spirit Sword, he effortlessly cleaved the bug into two pieces. Yami Bakura smirked. "Clean cut. if a bit uneven. Let's keep it up, shall we?" Yami Bakura this time summoned a spear cretin: a bizarre imp armed with a spear. It met the same fate as the bug, but the bug resurrected. "You like the spear cretin's ability? Have fun playing with my bug again."
"Did you forget how easily I beat it last time?" As if to demonstrate, Kuwabara swiftly hacked the bug to bits. Yami Bakura merely shrugged and summoned a second spear cretin. "Don't you have any better tricks?" mocked Kuwabara, killing the new abomination. "Well, how's that?" Bakura pointed to the ground where the fallen spear cretin once lay. In its place was a living, breathing cretin. "What the!? Didn't I just kill you?" Another swing of his sword, and that cretin met its end as well, but another rose from the ground to replace it. "What is this!? How many of these friggin' things are there!?" Yami Bakura laughed. "You're rather dull witted, aren't you? You saw the imp's ability. Just imagine what happens when there are two." Kuwabara slashed the endlessly reappearing fiends. It wasn't exactly hard work taking them out, but the constant action was starting to take its toll on the swordsman. When the Man-eater appeared again, Kazuma laughed in triumph. "Oh, did you screw up? Too bad, why don't you stop this crap and fight me like a man?" "You mean a brawl? Please, some of us are more refined than that. Why get my hands dirty when the infinite power of the Shadow Realm heads my every beck and call?" The spirit of the ring summoned a new beast, this one a reddish, bird-like monster. Its green eyes glowed wickedly, and the Ryukishin powered gargoyle advanced on Kuwabara, catching the Spirit Sword in its jaws and slashing at its opponent's stomach. Kuwabara narrowly avoided being disemboweled, and summoning a second sword, returned the favor.
Now heaving with exhaustion, Kuwabara looked at Yami Bakura. "Did you think these cheap tricks could beat someone as powerful as me?" he laughed, very pleased with his performance. Bakura sighed. "You really are a fool, aren't you? Didn't I tell you before this was a game? If you're not having fun with my monsters, then perhaps you'd prefer this one instead!" Ghostly images of the two Spear Cretins and the Ryukishin Powered floated in the air, and swirled together in a brilliant mosaic of color and light. Out of this makeshift portal stepped a woman, if it could be called that. Pale blue skin and no hair to speak of, the gangly creature sported battle armor, its harsh metal gloves clutched around a demonic doll. Bakura grinned and said, "Meet the Dark Necrophia. The game ends with her." Dark Necrophia rushed Kuwabara, planting a fist firmly in his stomach. He crumpled to the ground, spitting up a little blood. This one wasn't like the others. No, it was much more powerful. It seemed to Kuwabara that his opponent had finally stopped playing games. But that didn't mean he was going to give up. Leaping up into the air, Kuwabara fell back on an old trick. "Sword, get longer!" His sword nearly tripled in length, and went straight through Necrophia's head. Neither her nor her master could have been prepared. Yami Bakura clapped sarcastically, if that was possible. "Well done. I honestly never thought you would be able to beat Dark Necrophia. It's too bad beating her isn't enough to win against her."
"What are you talking about, you freak!?" To his horror, Kuwabara saw the Dark Necrophia rise, and struggled in vain as it latched itself onto him in a kind of hammerlock. "She takes control of the monster who destroys her, or in this case: you. It's been fun, sword boy, but I think I'm going to end it now. Kuwabara watched his own hand create a sword, which pointed itself at his stomach. Here he was, being possessed by a blue demon-thing, with an evil albino about to force him to commit seppuku. As Yusuke would put it, "This is dumb!" But the sword never moved. Instead, Yami Bakura fell to the ground, clutching his stomach. Behind him, a girl with light purple fox ears and a matching tail pulled a pin out of a voodoo doll. "That's enough, 'Ku-chan!" "S-F!? What the hell are you doing here?" "Nice to see you too. I was trying to write a story, but I can't start without my muse!" "Oh, yes, that's exactly what I want to be do-itai! Itai itai itai!" Kuwabara watched the authoress drag his antagonist away by his ear, and blinked heavily as the world around him returned to normal. "Screw Urameshi, I'm going home!"
End Fight.
Well, did everybody like it? Did everybody hate it? Did some of you like it and some of you hate it? Did.
Leena: Phoe-kun, matte! OK boys and girls, this concludes another chapter in the anime battle dome. no, that doesn't work either. Help us, people! We need a new title! And, uh. stand by with more requests. And a special note to Deathscythe: If you're reading this, know that your reviews did not go through. We would love to honor your requests, but as Phoe-kun's memory is sketchy at best, we'd need to hear them, or ones like them, again. To everyone else: Have fun, and request more fights as you think of them!
NON-LEGAL STUFF: You thought it would never happen, but I'm back. You thought it was safe it read ff.net. and you were pretty much right. After all, what am I going to do? Anyway, here is Shadow-Fox's backup request: Kuwabara versus Yami Bakura. Why my spell checker thinks "kawakawa" is preferable to Kuwabara, I will never know. Ack, tangent! Here we have the only hero in Yu Yu Hakusho to lose a fight (unless you count Poltergeist Report, in which case he was initially the only guy to win, but he was paired against a worthless waste of space, so I won't count it), fighting against an ancient and immortal spirit with aspirations of world conquest, also currently employed as S-F's muse. One has a sword made of pure spiritual energy; the other has a ring and a deck of trading cards. It doesn't sound very balanced when you put it like that, does it? Still, should be interesting, let's see how it turns out:
In the city of Domino, home to the best Magic and Wizards/Duel Monsters players in the world, a certain Kuwabara Kazuma wandered around, completely out of place. "Just what the hell am I doing here?" he said to nobody in particular. He walked past a bunch of kids excitedly opening packs of cards, paused to remark about what losers thy were, and continued walking. "Damn Urameshi. sticking me with this dumb job. 'Oh, Keiko wants Yugi Mutou's autograph, go get it for me, Kuwabara.' What the hell was I thinking, saying yes? Hmm. maybe I was drunk." Suddenly aware of another presence behind him, he wheeled around to find himself staring at a white- haired, damn near albino youth; only his soft brown eyes prevented him from being labeled as such. "You're looking for Yugi?" he asked. "Why, do you know him? Dude, what just happened to your face?" Kuwabara was staring at the same youth, and yet not. Suddenly seeming older, and definitely much more wicked; Bakura shrugged his shoulders, and glared at the street punk in front of him and said, "I believe that's my line." Enraged, Kuwabara loomed over his now opponent. "You wanna try saying that again!?" he cried.
"Ooh, hostile. good. It'll be more fun this way." Yami Bakura pulsed with the energy of his sennen ring, and everything around them went completely black. "You seem to have a fair amount of power," the dark spirit said, "and I've been rather bored lately. Why don't we play a little game?" With a diabolical grin on his face, he drew his deck out and held it in front of him. "Those things again? What are you gonna do, give me a paper cut?" Kuwabara laughed, but soon stopped as Yami Bakura very calmly selected a card and held it aloft. Glowing softly, it released a monster: a vicious, giant green insect. "Allow me to introduce the Man-eater Bug. We shall see how you fare against it." He casually pointed at Kuwabara, as if bemusedly telling the bug to attack. Kuwabara grinned. "You'll have to do better than that to defeat the great Kuwabara!" Summoning a Spirit Sword, he effortlessly cleaved the bug into two pieces. Yami Bakura smirked. "Clean cut. if a bit uneven. Let's keep it up, shall we?" Yami Bakura this time summoned a spear cretin: a bizarre imp armed with a spear. It met the same fate as the bug, but the bug resurrected. "You like the spear cretin's ability? Have fun playing with my bug again."
"Did you forget how easily I beat it last time?" As if to demonstrate, Kuwabara swiftly hacked the bug to bits. Yami Bakura merely shrugged and summoned a second spear cretin. "Don't you have any better tricks?" mocked Kuwabara, killing the new abomination. "Well, how's that?" Bakura pointed to the ground where the fallen spear cretin once lay. In its place was a living, breathing cretin. "What the!? Didn't I just kill you?" Another swing of his sword, and that cretin met its end as well, but another rose from the ground to replace it. "What is this!? How many of these friggin' things are there!?" Yami Bakura laughed. "You're rather dull witted, aren't you? You saw the imp's ability. Just imagine what happens when there are two." Kuwabara slashed the endlessly reappearing fiends. It wasn't exactly hard work taking them out, but the constant action was starting to take its toll on the swordsman. When the Man-eater appeared again, Kazuma laughed in triumph. "Oh, did you screw up? Too bad, why don't you stop this crap and fight me like a man?" "You mean a brawl? Please, some of us are more refined than that. Why get my hands dirty when the infinite power of the Shadow Realm heads my every beck and call?" The spirit of the ring summoned a new beast, this one a reddish, bird-like monster. Its green eyes glowed wickedly, and the Ryukishin powered gargoyle advanced on Kuwabara, catching the Spirit Sword in its jaws and slashing at its opponent's stomach. Kuwabara narrowly avoided being disemboweled, and summoning a second sword, returned the favor.
Now heaving with exhaustion, Kuwabara looked at Yami Bakura. "Did you think these cheap tricks could beat someone as powerful as me?" he laughed, very pleased with his performance. Bakura sighed. "You really are a fool, aren't you? Didn't I tell you before this was a game? If you're not having fun with my monsters, then perhaps you'd prefer this one instead!" Ghostly images of the two Spear Cretins and the Ryukishin Powered floated in the air, and swirled together in a brilliant mosaic of color and light. Out of this makeshift portal stepped a woman, if it could be called that. Pale blue skin and no hair to speak of, the gangly creature sported battle armor, its harsh metal gloves clutched around a demonic doll. Bakura grinned and said, "Meet the Dark Necrophia. The game ends with her." Dark Necrophia rushed Kuwabara, planting a fist firmly in his stomach. He crumpled to the ground, spitting up a little blood. This one wasn't like the others. No, it was much more powerful. It seemed to Kuwabara that his opponent had finally stopped playing games. But that didn't mean he was going to give up. Leaping up into the air, Kuwabara fell back on an old trick. "Sword, get longer!" His sword nearly tripled in length, and went straight through Necrophia's head. Neither her nor her master could have been prepared. Yami Bakura clapped sarcastically, if that was possible. "Well done. I honestly never thought you would be able to beat Dark Necrophia. It's too bad beating her isn't enough to win against her."
"What are you talking about, you freak!?" To his horror, Kuwabara saw the Dark Necrophia rise, and struggled in vain as it latched itself onto him in a kind of hammerlock. "She takes control of the monster who destroys her, or in this case: you. It's been fun, sword boy, but I think I'm going to end it now. Kuwabara watched his own hand create a sword, which pointed itself at his stomach. Here he was, being possessed by a blue demon-thing, with an evil albino about to force him to commit seppuku. As Yusuke would put it, "This is dumb!" But the sword never moved. Instead, Yami Bakura fell to the ground, clutching his stomach. Behind him, a girl with light purple fox ears and a matching tail pulled a pin out of a voodoo doll. "That's enough, 'Ku-chan!" "S-F!? What the hell are you doing here?" "Nice to see you too. I was trying to write a story, but I can't start without my muse!" "Oh, yes, that's exactly what I want to be do-itai! Itai itai itai!" Kuwabara watched the authoress drag his antagonist away by his ear, and blinked heavily as the world around him returned to normal. "Screw Urameshi, I'm going home!"
End Fight.
Well, did everybody like it? Did everybody hate it? Did some of you like it and some of you hate it? Did.
Leena: Phoe-kun, matte! OK boys and girls, this concludes another chapter in the anime battle dome. no, that doesn't work either. Help us, people! We need a new title! And, uh. stand by with more requests. And a special note to Deathscythe: If you're reading this, know that your reviews did not go through. We would love to honor your requests, but as Phoe-kun's memory is sketchy at best, we'd need to hear them, or ones like them, again. To everyone else: Have fun, and request more fights as you think of them!