A/N: I'm writing this before a) the Falling Girls From Other Worlds completely overrun the Pirates of the Caribbean section, and b) someone else takes this idea. So here you are: the first "Girls-Fall-Into-the-PotC" spoof. Enjoy.


"Hot."

"Oh yeah."

"Like… really hot."

"Mm-hmm…"

"Like, 'Can't touch this 'cause you'll get burned' hot."

"Yeah…"

Kristin and Melanie watched as, on-screen, Jack Sparrow fought against Will Turner in a Room Lit Dimly For Greater Effect™. Their sinewy bodies moved perfectly in time: one, two, one, two, stab, swipe, parry, parry, thrust, parry, jump. Next to the girls, a couple was making out, but the two friends weren't paying attention to them: they were watching the well-muscled, gorgeous men on screen who were fighting in an oh-so-drool-worthy fashion. Both girls wanted to find the action sequence choreographer and personally thank him.

"Krissy," Melanie whispered, leaning over to talk more easily with her friend, "wouldn't it be great to be able to...like, you know...go into this movie? See Orlando...I mean, Will, and Jack? Maybe even get to sail on the Black Pearl? Once Jack gets it back and kills Barbossa, I mean."

Everyone in the theater who was seeing the film for the first time glared in Melanie's general direction.

"Oh, yeah," Kristin responded. "I wish we could go into this movie and become pirates, just like Elizabeth and that girl whose boat Jack stole!"

Now, in most cases, wishing for something this abysmally absurd would be accompanied only by laughs. After all, it just isn't possible to propel oneself into a roll of film and thusly be transported into the reality in which the movie takes place. That's just not how it works in real life.

But, when you wish for something impossible like that to happen while watching a Disney movie, by Walt, it does!

Kristin suddenly noticed her hands were glowing blue. "Mellie!" she quietly squealed, holding her hands up. "Look at this!"

Melanie looked at her own hands, which were also glowing a strange blue shade which was quickly spreading down her arms. "Oh my God! No way!"

"Shhh!" someone behind the girls hissed, but it was a moot point, because the two girls had already disappeared into what they were sure was a much better place than where they had been.

Noting that the squealing and giggling that hadn't been coming from them had ceased, the making-out couple stopped sucking face. The woman looked over the man's shoulder at the now-empty seats which had not long before held two giggling teenyboppers.

"Honey," she said, "where did those two fangirls go?"

"Who cares?" her boyfriend said, playing with her hair.

"Hmm. Good point."

And they then returned to making out.

The crew members of the Black Pearl who happened to be on deck looked to the starboard side.

"Cap'n," Anamaria said, "did you 'ear that?"

"I did," said Jack. "Sounded like something fallin' into the water from a few 'undred meters up and explodin' on impact."

"Wonder what it was."

"Should we go check, Cap'n?"

Before Jack could answer, the watcher in the crow's-nest suddenly called out, "Oy! Ship approaching off the port side!"

And so, in the hustle and bustle of preparing for a possible battle, the concern over the mysterious splash was forgotten.

Meanwhile, somewhere in the Caribbean, a lone shark was swimming around, doing normal shark-things, such as looking for food and avoiding dolphins, when a familiar scent hit its nose: blood. Human blood. And, if he had been a shark swimming in Twentieth-century waters, he might have recognized a unique twist in the blood's scent: buttery theater popcorn.

~End


A/N: I suppose after dealing with a few too many "Girl-Falls-Into-Middle-Earth" stories in the Lord of the Rings section, I've just become a bitter old cynic and can no longer see any good in these sorts of stories when they're written in a serious spirit. Oh well. Please review.