~*~
"Everything okay, Jake?" Alex asked when he rejoined the group.
"Fine, just fine," he growled, pushing past her angrily.
"I'm really sorry," she apologized, trailing after him. "I didn't mean..."
"Are they a couple or something?" Quinn asked curiously, trailing behind the group with Cody.
"Naw, just friends. They've been UC together for a while. You build a bond when you're partners."
She huffed slightly. I know all about that. "So I'm told."
"How long have you and Sam worked together?" Cody asked, making polite conversation. He hadn't expected Quinn's change in demeanor, but he was more than willing to talk to a pretty girl. It wasn't like that happened to him all that often.
"Oh, off and on, about ten years," she answered, trying to keep her tone light.
"That's a long time," he commented offhandedly. "What's your area of expertise?"
She batted a twig out of her path. "Intelligence. These days, we mostly monitor specific communications for terrorist activity."
"Whoa."
Chuckling lightly, she nodded. "Yes. Whoa."
Donovan listened intently as they trekked through the thick foliage. They stopped every so often, taking rest breaks, lunch breaks, and much to the extreme distaste of the women, bathroom breaks. When he checked the map in the late afternoon it became apparent they would not reach Sanctuary by nightfall.
Two hours before dusk he gave the orders for Sam and Jake to scout ahead for a place to set up camp. Once located, Donovan sent Cody and Quinn to search for firewood while Jake helped Alex and Monica set up camp.
"Sam, let's see what we can scare up for food," Donovan suggested. Lunch had consisted of a portion of their rations and he wasn't really looking forward to another helping of that. Real meat sounded like heaven at that moment.
Less than an hour later, the group looked on as Donovan and Sam strolled back to camp, each carrying a wild rabbit by the ears.
"Oh man! You killed Thumper," Cody lamented.
"Just bring me one of my canteens," Donovan ordered sternly. "Sam, can you set up a spit?"
"Consider it done," Sam replied. He took a few of the larger twigs Quinn and Cody had gathered and began peeling the bark from them.
"You're awfully agreeable," Quinn whispered, kneeling next to him. She took one of the twigs and began shaving the ends into a point with her knife.
"Yeah, well, I'm hungry," he replied sharply.
"How'd you catch 'em anyway?"
"He's got deadly aim with a knife, Quinn. You know that," he replied, glancing at her sideways.
Quinn turned her attention to Donovan. He was busy gutting and cleaning the rabbits. She watched as he used his own supply of drinking water to wash the blood away. Damn him for being so unselfish. It really didn't matter; she was still determined to carry out her plan. If she was going down, she would damn well see that he paid for what he had done.
The team sat silently watching their boss ready the wild game for cooking over the makeshift spit Sam erected. Their eyes followed Quinn as she moved from Sam's side to Donovan's, carrying two wooden skewers she had made from the kindling.
"Ready?" She asked, kneeling beside him.
Donovan nodded and reached for one of the skewers she held. He inserted it through the animal's carcass and handed it to Quinn. "Put that over the fire while I finish preparing the other."
Quinn nodded and placed the rabbit on the spit. "Here ya go, Sam."
Sam nodded. "Never was much of a cook, huh Quinn?"
"No, and proud of it," she acknowledged, as she retrieved the second rabbit from Donovan and placed it on the spit. "You keep an eye on them."
"Will do."
It took little more than thirty minutes for the game to cook over the open flame. There was enough for each person to have a good-sized chunk, and each considered it a blessing over the rations they carried.
Donovan peeled off two hunks of meat and made his way over to Quinn, who was sitting alone on her sleeping bag. "Hungry?"
Quinn nodded as she accepted the piece of rabbit. "Thanks. And thanks for hunting the little critters."
"May I?" he asked, pointing to the spot next to her.
"Sure, why not?" she agreed easily. Grimacing, she peeled off a layer of meat and popped it into her mouth. She'd had rabbit before in her lifetime, but it was definitely not something she enjoyed.
"How've you been, Quinn?" he asked quietly as he sat cross-legged next to her. Seeing her again made him realize that he had never really stopped missing her. He had just tucked her away into a part of his mind that he did not allow himself to venture into often.
"I think you know," she replied cryptically. She looked up into his eyes and thought she saw concern and compassion there, but she had to be wrong. Donovan didn't possess such traits. He was cold, callous, and determined. She needed to remember that. "Don't look at me like that."
He shook his head slightly and massaged his brow with his fingertips. "Like what, Quinn? Like I care...I do...I always have."
"Stop it," she whispered hoarsely. Shoving the remainder of the rabbit into her mouth, she uncapped her canteen. After swallowing the meat, she took a long drink before handing him the canteen. "You used most of your water cleaning the rabbit."
He accepted the canteen with a shrug. "Had to do it. I'll have enough."
"Sure," she replied, unconvinced as she watched him tip his head back and drink from the canteen. She noted he took care not to drink very much, just enough to wet his throat.
"Quinn," he started as he handed her back the canteen.
"No," she ground out through clenched teeth. "We cannot go back, Donovan. You are not my friend, and I will never be yours."
Releasing a sigh, Donovan scrambled to his feet and gazed down at her upturned face. "We were friends once, Quinn. But another friendship blinded you to the truth."
"Leave me alone," she spat hatefully.
"Get some sleep, we'll be leaving at dawn," he ordered.
"Aye, aye, Commander."
He crossed the small area to where his sleeping bag was spread out and checked it carefully before crawling inside. Glancing about the camp, he noted that everyone except was nestled in their sleeping bags, except Sam, who was taking the first watch to guard them from any wild animals that may be lurking. He closed his eyes and prayed for sleep to come swiftly. He was on the next watch.
~*~
She waited patiently. The ebbing glow of the fire let her know that more than an hour had passed since the camp retired for the evening. Her eyes wandered over to Sam, who had drifted off to sleep in a sitting position. The errant thought that Donovan would have his hide for falling asleep at his post entered her mind. It was a good thing for Sam that after she was through with him that would be the last thing on Donovan's mind. Her fingers curled around the hilt of her knife as she slid purposefully from beneath the layer of her sleeping bag.
His ever-busy internal clock went off with alarm. Without moving, his eyes found Sam seated on his sleeping bag, apparently sound asleep. The fire had died down, but he saw the faintest shadow move across the camp. Silently and stealthily the trouble moved his way. He closed his eyes and waited.
She looked down upon his sleeping form, sinking to her knees beside him. Images and sounds, ugly and brutal, flashed through her mind. It hadn't been his entire fault, and yet, he was the symbol of the most horrid moment of her life. It was time to end it; time for a little justice.
As she raised her arm to strike, the faint glow from the fire glinted off the knife's blade. Quinn gasped in surprise as Donovan's hand snaked out and grabbed her wrist. "No!" came her strangled cry as she struggled against his grip.
Donovan was surprised by the strength she held behind her attack. He held her off easily enough, and he could end this swiftly, but she had to come to terms with the past. Somehow, he had to make her realize things don't always go as planned and no one is to blame. "Wake up, Quinn. What do you hope to accomplish?"
His voice was nothing more than a hushed whisper but sounded like a blaring horn to her. "How could you? How could you do it?" she growled, pushing forward with her upper body.
"I didn't do anything, Quinn. When will you realize it was just...the way it had to be." His arm wavered slightly as she struggled to free herself from his grasp. Frustrated, she moved the knife to her free hand, but he was faster, capturing it easily within the grip of his other hand.
"Damn you, Donovan. Damn you. Let...me...go!"
"So you can kill me?"
"Yes," she hissed.
"And what will that solve, Quinn? Will it change things? Will it?"
"Shut up!"
His grip tightened on her wrists and he watched as her face grimaced with pain. "Will it turn back the clock and bring him back?"
"God, I hate you! Shut up shut up shut up!" The sound of her own voice sickened her. It was the sound of a weak, sniveling schoolgirl, incapable of exacting the revenge that he so richly deserved.
Donovan gazed into her tear filled eyes and wanted nothing more than to make all her hurt and frustration go away. The old familiar wants took hold and he longed to pull her into his embrace, assure her that her demons could be exorcized, but if he even attempted to do that he might very well feel her blade embedded deep into his chest. His expression softened just a bit as he whispered softly, "Look inside you, Quinn. Remember what was between us before that night. If you cannot see past your pain to the truth, then do it. Do what you have to do to make it right for you."
Quinn's eyes widened in astonishment when he drew both hands away from her; he was allowing her free reign to do as she pleased. She looked down at his prone form, lying still, awaiting her judgment. Her eyes were fixed steadily onto his as she raised the knife, intent on her duty. Remember what was between us before that night… With a howl, she plunged it downward until it sunk deep into its target. Pushing up from the ground, she ran across the small compound and collapsed face down onto her sleeping bag.
Releasing the breath he had been holding, Donovan glanced to his left without moving his head. Quinn's Bowie knife was embedded deep into the soil next to his head. She had missed his ear by a mere quarter of an inch. She couldn't do it. When push came to shove, she could not cause him any harm. Somewhere inside her, she knew the truth of that night. If he could just get her to admit it, there was still a chance for her.
As he sat up, he noticed the entire camp was awake, staring at him in complete shock. Without a word to them, he made his way to Quinn and kneeled beside her. He touched the small of her back lightly and noticed her body hitch slightly with silent sobs. "Quinn," he whispered softly.
She sat up quickly but refused to look at him. "I still hate you," she insisted in a hushed tone.
"You never hated me," he returned softly. "We'll work this out, Quinn."
She looked up at him then, taking in the gentle appearance his face took on in the waning firelight. "I just tried to kill you." She noted the movement in the camp from over his shoulder. She had never wished so much to be alone in her life. As much as she was sure she hated the man kneeling before her, she was just as convinced she wanted to be held in his arms.
"Get some sleep," he ordered, touching her cheek softly. "We'll talk more tomorrow." He waited until she slid into her sleeping bag and closed her eyes. Only when it appeared that she had drifted into an exhausted sleep did he leave her side.
He was immediately hit with questions when he left her to join the others. "Before you pass judgment on her, she had her reasons for attacking me."
"But...shouldn't we restrain her or something?" Cody asked concernedly, his eyes drifting over to the soundly sleeping woman.
Donovan shook his head. "No, there will be no repeat performance."
"How can you be sure?" Alex asked. "Jesus, that knife came damn close. If I'd have had my gun, I would have killed her, Donovan."
He sighed heavily. "I know, Alex. Just trust me on this. And as a personal favor to me, I'd appreciate it if you didn't bring this up to her or..."
"Treat her like a criminal?" Sam asked. "I would appreciate that, too."
"If that's how you want it, Donovan," Monica acknowledged.
"Thank you." He scanned the group quickly before adding, "Since you're all awake, I'm going to catch a bit more sleep. And Sam, fall asleep on duty again, and I'll put it on your record."
"Yes, sir!"
He returned to his sleeping bag and watched Quinn's sleeping form for a few moments before he sank down to the uncomfortable ground. He had the feeling the rest of the group would be up for the duration, and although he intended on sleeping, he knew that his dreams would be just as haunted as the frightened and confused woman who slept across the camp from him. The time for talk and understanding would come with the dawning of the new day; he only hoped she was ready to face the truth she had buried behind the villain she had created.
~*~
To be continued…