Disclaimer: Yui doesn't own Chobits. Clamp does. Melodies of Life is from Final Fantasy 9.
Forever Yours
By miyamoto yui
Chapter 9 - Sagashite iru, doko made mo. (Searching, wherever.)
I was watching myself once more as if watching a clipped movie of my life. There she was in the dining room of my large mansion trying to get my younger self to settle down.
Kaede Nee-chan was putting my shoes on as she laughed when I said, "I could do it myself."
She shook her head as she patted my head. "Of course you can, Mino-kun. But let me do it for today, okay?"
I nodded while playfully swinging my legs on the chair I was sitting on. She was kneeling on the floor with a head shaking and her hair swinging from side to side. "Do you want to be late to see the Angelic Layer match?"
I put my hands on my lap and became instantly still with wide eyes.
"Unless you don't want to go…" she teased with her eyes closed and shoulders shrugging.
I shook my head. "Oh no, I don't want to miss the first match! It's HER!"
At this, my sister lifted up her hand and laughed. Then, she put my shoes on my feet.
They were the red sneakers she had gotten me.
She lifted me out of my seat and poked my cheeks. "You really like her, don't you?"
I nodded my head as I took Nee-chan's hand and headed out to the Angelic Layer tournament hall.
When we got there, it wasn't Nee-chan's turn to go, so we went to the railings way at the top. Nee-chan asked me, "Do you want to go to the front? You'll see better there."
I shook my head and pointed at the screen. "I can see her!"
"And he forgets about saying hi to me," someone said in a fake angry tone.
"Sai Nee-chan~!" I ran to Sai and hugged her leg because I was so short. Well, considering that she was tall too.
"Oi, Minoru-kun." She patted my head while looking from side to side. Then, she handed me a box of Pocky.
"Thank you!" I happily said as I hugged her leg again.
Nee-chan pouted. "Sai, I keep on telling you not to spoil him."
She just shrugged her shoulders. "As long as you're not mad, it's all right. Besides, aren't you one to talk?"
Sai smirked as Nee-chan lifted up her chin a bit.
I tore the box open as Nee-chan lifted me up and we sat on a seat by the stairway. She sat me in her lap and hugged me while pointing at the screen. Sai just shook her head, came next to us and patted Nee-chan's shoulder.
"First round…In the West corner…" the announcer shouted in the microphone. "In the East corner, Angel Suzuka! Deus Kobayashi Hatoko!!!"
I clapped my hands as the match began and watched attentively.
To tell the truth, I didn't know what Angelic Layer was at all. I was coming home from school when I had seen a sale at the Piffle Princess but I was too little to say anything.
Not that I was any older, but ever since I was told, "Minoru-kun, you have a sister," I was excited to meet her. They told me she was in Angelic Layer.
So, I started to watch Angelic Layer matches on tv, but the first match I had ever seen was Suzuka's! I had missed who the Deus was and anticipated again when I would see her.
I searched the internet until I found her: Kobayashi Hatoko.
And she was only a few years older than I.
You could say she was my first crush.
So, when she won, I really didn't know that my Nee-chans' had known her. I think that's why Kaede Nee-chan kept on laughing at my innocence.
When I saw her backstage, I was so frightened. There was something about looking at her face-to-face and into her eyes that was so different than watching her fight.
She was just a kid like me.
But…if she were as lonely as me, I didn't know…
"Hatoko-chan?" Nee-chan smiled as she pushed me towards Kobayashi-san. "This is my little brother, Minoru-kun. He's a big fan of yours."
She smiled as she held out her hand to me. "Hello, I'm Hatoko."
"H-hi." I said as I shook her hand, but nothing more. I didn't really talk too much, except to Nee-chan.
"You like Angelic Layer too?" she asked as we were walking.
I nodded my head nervously while trying to keep from staring at her.
"Do you have a doll yet?"
I shook my head.
"If you did, what would you name it?"
I shrugged my shoulders.
"Ah…"
Then, I stammered, "I'd make one that looks like Nee-chan, but I want it to be strong like you."
Nee-chan blinked her eyes. Sai blinked her eyes too with a smirk.
I blushed red, almost as red as when I had first looked at Yuzuki before switching her on.
"Notice that he said 'like you' and not 'like Suzuka'," Sai whispered to my sister. "You have competition."
Nee-chan couldn't help but laugh as she patted my head.
Hatoko laughed also as she patted my shoulders. "You're very cute."
I remembered that she smiled at me, not for being politely, but really smiled at me. Hatoko was always pretty and strong to me…
--
I must have been out of it because I found myself back on my bed with even more patches from scraping myself when I fell onto the floor.
And I could feel someone's hand on my forehead. It was a warm hand…
I had wished it was hers…
"Minoru-kun?" she said as I opened my blurry eyes to find that girl in front of me…
The long, black hair with the signature red hat that she couldn't give up since Kindergarten. Then again, it was her trademark.
"Hatoko-chan?" I blinked my eyes and immediately became red at the cheeks. "H-how…"
"A-hem." Another person in the room cleared their throat purposely. As I turned my head, I found another familiar face only a few feet away from me. "Your sister would be really upset with me if she saw this."
I blinked my eyes and smiled. "Oh, Sai Nee-chan."
Her eyes closed a bit. "You're no different from her, aren't you?"
I laughed sheepishly at the girl that my sister loved as much as she loved me. The one that took care of her even when our father got upset-
"How are you doing?" Hatako asked as she squeezed my hand. Then, she lightly hit me on the hair, just scuffing it a bit. "You baka. I came in here to find that you were on the floor and not on the bed! You were heavy."
"I'm sorry," I explained with a crack in my voice and a sigh. "Yuzuki was here and I couldn't stop her from leaving."
Sai sighed as she shook her head. "How many times does this have to go on?"
Hatako tried to catch her hand as Sai left the room with an upset expression.
She turned to me and gave me a gentle smile. "You know how, Sai-san is…"
I nodded. I couldn't blame her, though.
Losing my sister was still something that never left us. It was a scar that embedded itself so much that it became a staple like iron in our blood.
We died little-by-little like poison, and yet, we needed it to live at the same time.
"I know," I answered with a sigh. "It's only scary when Shirahime's Deus isn't feeling _anything_."
"Very, very true," Hatoko nodded her head with a slight smile.
Her expression changed as she challenged me. "Why are you even here, my dear Minoru-kun?"
"I was in the rain and got sick." I put my hands together for my stupidity. In a normal state of mind, I would have never done this.
"So, I've heard…" she said. "But it's not that. I'm not talking about that. You don't belong in a place like this."
It was then that she produced the papers in front of me. "Come on, let's go."
"What?" I said with a high-pitched tone of surprise.
"You're leaving right now. I can't stand you being like this," Hatoko harshly said as she pushed me up. "There's nothing wrong with you."
"I'm-" I protested.
"You're broken here." She patted my chest softly, where my heart was. "And only I can help you there right now because Sai-san is too upset."
"What about-" I tried to point out.
"We'll call her later. And I told Ms. Hibiya that I'd take care of you today, okay?" She smiled as I got dressed in the bathroom.
As I washed my face, I saw my reflection. "Hatoko…hasn't changed…"
So, there I was checking myself out of the hospital with a girl that had told me I didn't need to be there. And she was right.
She even carried my backpack of stuff and walked by me. "Today, you will come with me."
While walking to wherever Hatoko wanted to go, I told her about Yuzuki's visit and what was going on. She nodded as she listened attentively.
After fifteen minutes had passed, we found ourselves in front of the Piffle Princess store. I took a big gulp.
I didn't want to go there…
Not after what happened…
"Face your fear." Hatoko stood in front of me with a serious face. "You told me you wanted to be as strong as me? Or did you lie to me because you were only a little kid?"
I blinked my eyes in embarrassment and shock. "You still remember that?"
She shook her head with a smile. "Of course I did."
Tugging on my sleeve, she slowly led me in. We went to the back of the store to see the special display they had put up years ago. It was a glass case with lights to accentuate the fine details of each display.
Some were replicas, and some were the real ones themselves.
I shook as I saw each while mumbling each of their names to myself,
"Natasha…Ranga…"
I stopped as I saw the replicas of Hikaru and Wizard next to one another with their backs to one another almost as if they were going to dance. Next, I stopped to touch the glass case that held Sai's Shirahime as it was years ago before she was retired…
But I couldn't turn to see who was next. Wherever Sai was, my sister was sure to be next to her…
All the voices kept on coming back to me…
"What happened?!" people shouted as soon as Sai turned to me with a shock face while holding my sister in her arms.
"Onee-chan?"
We didn't know…
She never told us it was so serious…
"I'm fine, really." She had said over and over whenever we asked her.
We believed her.
For how could Heaven's smile lie to her most beloved?
Yet, she had.
Hatoko shook me to get me out of my mental chaos. "Minoru-kun! You have to see what she put!"
I shook my head.
"There is nothing to fear," Nee-chan's voice told me once as I remembered her wiping my tears away. "Onee-chan will always be there for you. Remember that, Minoru-kun. Always…"
I began to open my eyes as Hatoko brought me to the display of Blanche. She had her arms out as if to turn and dance while leaning forward. White and as dazzling as ever.
On a little card, it said, "To my little brother. Taking care of you wherever I am."
I was holding my composure until the store radio played a song from a video game that was being re-released for the the umpteenth time, but never forgotten.
I never showed this to Yuzuki, but she sang it to me when she brought me back to reality with her love and smile. This was the song that made me fall so in love with her.
I started to cry while standing there in a trance as I reached out to Hatoko's hand to lend me her strength while I listened painfully:
"Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark
For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart
To weave by picking up the pieces that remain
Melodies of life - love's lost refrain"
I knew the next line as I grabbed Hatoko and wrapped my arms around her not minding that I was weak. 'Little Minoru' they had always called me, and I had always showed people my strength. But all that time, I was so lonely.
"Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why
We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye
And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?
Let them ring out loud till they unfold
In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me
Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name
A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
Adding up the layers of harmony
And so it goes, on and on
Melodies of life,
To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond
So far and away, see the bird as it flies by
Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky
I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings
Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings
In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?
Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?
A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
Adding up the layers of harmony
And so it goes, on and on
Melodies of life,
To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond
If I should leave this lonely world behind
Your voice will still remember our melody
Now I know we'll carry on
Melodies of life
Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts
As long as we remember."
"Why are you scared, Minoru-kun?" Hatoko patted my back. "I told you she wanted you to see this someday. But you never wanted to come here."
Nee-chan knew she was going to die…
I didn't want to come to see the dedication as an act of defiance to her.
I was mad at Nee-chan for lying to me…
Seeing both my sister and Yuzuki next to one another in my mind, I said, "Yuzuki told me to let her go."
That was what ran through my head all this time. I couldn't understand, yet I understood just as much.
"Maybe that's what you have to do." Hatoko said as she looked at Blanche in front of us.
"Why? I need her. And she needs me."
"She sees herself as a shadow, Minoru-kun. The more you see her, the more you see Kaede-san."
"No!" I shouted as my body shook. "I've learned to let go so long ago. I love Yuzuki and I will give up everything else if that's what it amounts to."
"But like your sister, you've to understand that she'll leave you because she doesn't want you to do that." She explained. "Yuzuki's love is just that way."
"I never wanted her to sacrifice anything for my sake."
"Maybe someone else did," Hatoko started to say. "Herself. She's doing this for herself. To discover why would you give up everything for her."
"Because she likes who I am. She doesn't look at me like her master or even a brother. She doesn't want me for money or for power…" My eyes started to pour onto her clothes with my silent sobs while hugging Hatoko closer. "She stopped my loneliness and showed me what it meant to be alive after being dead when Nee-chan died."
"Since she cannot show you through words or emotions, she's showing you something else. That's the difference between your sister and Yuzuki-san. Yuzuki-san is telling you, not because she's weaker, but she is unafraid of being hurt. The most important thing is you, and for you to be hurt is the _only_ thing that would break her."
I told her, "But this is worse, doesn't she know?"
"No, she doesn't know that. That was one thing your sister didn't understand," she said to me as she hugged me even closer.
I mumbled, "Yuzuki…"
"Yuzuki is telling you something is wrong and she's not hiding it from you anymore…"
It was then that I stopped crying and looked at Blanche once more.
"I understand now…" I said as I held onto Hatoko's arms while still looking at Blanche.
She let go of me as her confident smile came back. That meant things were the way they should be.
"Then why are you still here?" She laughed as she pushed me away while wiping away a tear. "I'll take care of your bag."
I began to quickly walk away from her with a loud, "Thank you, Hatoko!"
She slapped her hand on her forehead as people came up to her saying, "Oh my god! It's Suzuka's Deus!!!!"
I ran out into the street like a madman towards my grandmother's house.
She wants me to find her before she runs out of time…
To find her beneath
Her smile…
The true Yuzuki.
Tsuzuku…
--
Author's notes: Yes, I know I'm dragging it out. I thought that I was going to make this much longer, but I guess not. If I drag it out too much, it will wear out its charm. Can I really keep an audience this long? Even I have a short attention span. Thanks for putting up with me!
Damn, I can't help but keep crying on this chapter. * is still crying *
Forever Yours
By miyamoto yui
Chapter 9 - Sagashite iru, doko made mo. (Searching, wherever.)
I was watching myself once more as if watching a clipped movie of my life. There she was in the dining room of my large mansion trying to get my younger self to settle down.
Kaede Nee-chan was putting my shoes on as she laughed when I said, "I could do it myself."
She shook her head as she patted my head. "Of course you can, Mino-kun. But let me do it for today, okay?"
I nodded while playfully swinging my legs on the chair I was sitting on. She was kneeling on the floor with a head shaking and her hair swinging from side to side. "Do you want to be late to see the Angelic Layer match?"
I put my hands on my lap and became instantly still with wide eyes.
"Unless you don't want to go…" she teased with her eyes closed and shoulders shrugging.
I shook my head. "Oh no, I don't want to miss the first match! It's HER!"
At this, my sister lifted up her hand and laughed. Then, she put my shoes on my feet.
They were the red sneakers she had gotten me.
She lifted me out of my seat and poked my cheeks. "You really like her, don't you?"
I nodded my head as I took Nee-chan's hand and headed out to the Angelic Layer tournament hall.
When we got there, it wasn't Nee-chan's turn to go, so we went to the railings way at the top. Nee-chan asked me, "Do you want to go to the front? You'll see better there."
I shook my head and pointed at the screen. "I can see her!"
"And he forgets about saying hi to me," someone said in a fake angry tone.
"Sai Nee-chan~!" I ran to Sai and hugged her leg because I was so short. Well, considering that she was tall too.
"Oi, Minoru-kun." She patted my head while looking from side to side. Then, she handed me a box of Pocky.
"Thank you!" I happily said as I hugged her leg again.
Nee-chan pouted. "Sai, I keep on telling you not to spoil him."
She just shrugged her shoulders. "As long as you're not mad, it's all right. Besides, aren't you one to talk?"
Sai smirked as Nee-chan lifted up her chin a bit.
I tore the box open as Nee-chan lifted me up and we sat on a seat by the stairway. She sat me in her lap and hugged me while pointing at the screen. Sai just shook her head, came next to us and patted Nee-chan's shoulder.
"First round…In the West corner…" the announcer shouted in the microphone. "In the East corner, Angel Suzuka! Deus Kobayashi Hatoko!!!"
I clapped my hands as the match began and watched attentively.
To tell the truth, I didn't know what Angelic Layer was at all. I was coming home from school when I had seen a sale at the Piffle Princess but I was too little to say anything.
Not that I was any older, but ever since I was told, "Minoru-kun, you have a sister," I was excited to meet her. They told me she was in Angelic Layer.
So, I started to watch Angelic Layer matches on tv, but the first match I had ever seen was Suzuka's! I had missed who the Deus was and anticipated again when I would see her.
I searched the internet until I found her: Kobayashi Hatoko.
And she was only a few years older than I.
You could say she was my first crush.
So, when she won, I really didn't know that my Nee-chans' had known her. I think that's why Kaede Nee-chan kept on laughing at my innocence.
When I saw her backstage, I was so frightened. There was something about looking at her face-to-face and into her eyes that was so different than watching her fight.
She was just a kid like me.
But…if she were as lonely as me, I didn't know…
"Hatoko-chan?" Nee-chan smiled as she pushed me towards Kobayashi-san. "This is my little brother, Minoru-kun. He's a big fan of yours."
She smiled as she held out her hand to me. "Hello, I'm Hatoko."
"H-hi." I said as I shook her hand, but nothing more. I didn't really talk too much, except to Nee-chan.
"You like Angelic Layer too?" she asked as we were walking.
I nodded my head nervously while trying to keep from staring at her.
"Do you have a doll yet?"
I shook my head.
"If you did, what would you name it?"
I shrugged my shoulders.
"Ah…"
Then, I stammered, "I'd make one that looks like Nee-chan, but I want it to be strong like you."
Nee-chan blinked her eyes. Sai blinked her eyes too with a smirk.
I blushed red, almost as red as when I had first looked at Yuzuki before switching her on.
"Notice that he said 'like you' and not 'like Suzuka'," Sai whispered to my sister. "You have competition."
Nee-chan couldn't help but laugh as she patted my head.
Hatoko laughed also as she patted my shoulders. "You're very cute."
I remembered that she smiled at me, not for being politely, but really smiled at me. Hatoko was always pretty and strong to me…
--
I must have been out of it because I found myself back on my bed with even more patches from scraping myself when I fell onto the floor.
And I could feel someone's hand on my forehead. It was a warm hand…
I had wished it was hers…
"Minoru-kun?" she said as I opened my blurry eyes to find that girl in front of me…
The long, black hair with the signature red hat that she couldn't give up since Kindergarten. Then again, it was her trademark.
"Hatoko-chan?" I blinked my eyes and immediately became red at the cheeks. "H-how…"
"A-hem." Another person in the room cleared their throat purposely. As I turned my head, I found another familiar face only a few feet away from me. "Your sister would be really upset with me if she saw this."
I blinked my eyes and smiled. "Oh, Sai Nee-chan."
Her eyes closed a bit. "You're no different from her, aren't you?"
I laughed sheepishly at the girl that my sister loved as much as she loved me. The one that took care of her even when our father got upset-
"How are you doing?" Hatako asked as she squeezed my hand. Then, she lightly hit me on the hair, just scuffing it a bit. "You baka. I came in here to find that you were on the floor and not on the bed! You were heavy."
"I'm sorry," I explained with a crack in my voice and a sigh. "Yuzuki was here and I couldn't stop her from leaving."
Sai sighed as she shook her head. "How many times does this have to go on?"
Hatako tried to catch her hand as Sai left the room with an upset expression.
She turned to me and gave me a gentle smile. "You know how, Sai-san is…"
I nodded. I couldn't blame her, though.
Losing my sister was still something that never left us. It was a scar that embedded itself so much that it became a staple like iron in our blood.
We died little-by-little like poison, and yet, we needed it to live at the same time.
"I know," I answered with a sigh. "It's only scary when Shirahime's Deus isn't feeling _anything_."
"Very, very true," Hatoko nodded her head with a slight smile.
Her expression changed as she challenged me. "Why are you even here, my dear Minoru-kun?"
"I was in the rain and got sick." I put my hands together for my stupidity. In a normal state of mind, I would have never done this.
"So, I've heard…" she said. "But it's not that. I'm not talking about that. You don't belong in a place like this."
It was then that she produced the papers in front of me. "Come on, let's go."
"What?" I said with a high-pitched tone of surprise.
"You're leaving right now. I can't stand you being like this," Hatoko harshly said as she pushed me up. "There's nothing wrong with you."
"I'm-" I protested.
"You're broken here." She patted my chest softly, where my heart was. "And only I can help you there right now because Sai-san is too upset."
"What about-" I tried to point out.
"We'll call her later. And I told Ms. Hibiya that I'd take care of you today, okay?" She smiled as I got dressed in the bathroom.
As I washed my face, I saw my reflection. "Hatoko…hasn't changed…"
So, there I was checking myself out of the hospital with a girl that had told me I didn't need to be there. And she was right.
She even carried my backpack of stuff and walked by me. "Today, you will come with me."
While walking to wherever Hatoko wanted to go, I told her about Yuzuki's visit and what was going on. She nodded as she listened attentively.
After fifteen minutes had passed, we found ourselves in front of the Piffle Princess store. I took a big gulp.
I didn't want to go there…
Not after what happened…
"Face your fear." Hatoko stood in front of me with a serious face. "You told me you wanted to be as strong as me? Or did you lie to me because you were only a little kid?"
I blinked my eyes in embarrassment and shock. "You still remember that?"
She shook her head with a smile. "Of course I did."
Tugging on my sleeve, she slowly led me in. We went to the back of the store to see the special display they had put up years ago. It was a glass case with lights to accentuate the fine details of each display.
Some were replicas, and some were the real ones themselves.
I shook as I saw each while mumbling each of their names to myself,
"Natasha…Ranga…"
I stopped as I saw the replicas of Hikaru and Wizard next to one another with their backs to one another almost as if they were going to dance. Next, I stopped to touch the glass case that held Sai's Shirahime as it was years ago before she was retired…
But I couldn't turn to see who was next. Wherever Sai was, my sister was sure to be next to her…
All the voices kept on coming back to me…
"What happened?!" people shouted as soon as Sai turned to me with a shock face while holding my sister in her arms.
"Onee-chan?"
We didn't know…
She never told us it was so serious…
"I'm fine, really." She had said over and over whenever we asked her.
We believed her.
For how could Heaven's smile lie to her most beloved?
Yet, she had.
Hatoko shook me to get me out of my mental chaos. "Minoru-kun! You have to see what she put!"
I shook my head.
"There is nothing to fear," Nee-chan's voice told me once as I remembered her wiping my tears away. "Onee-chan will always be there for you. Remember that, Minoru-kun. Always…"
I began to open my eyes as Hatoko brought me to the display of Blanche. She had her arms out as if to turn and dance while leaning forward. White and as dazzling as ever.
On a little card, it said, "To my little brother. Taking care of you wherever I am."
I was holding my composure until the store radio played a song from a video game that was being re-released for the the umpteenth time, but never forgotten.
I never showed this to Yuzuki, but she sang it to me when she brought me back to reality with her love and smile. This was the song that made me fall so in love with her.
I started to cry while standing there in a trance as I reached out to Hatoko's hand to lend me her strength while I listened painfully:
"Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark
For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart
To weave by picking up the pieces that remain
Melodies of life - love's lost refrain"
I knew the next line as I grabbed Hatoko and wrapped my arms around her not minding that I was weak. 'Little Minoru' they had always called me, and I had always showed people my strength. But all that time, I was so lonely.
"Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why
We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye
And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?
Let them ring out loud till they unfold
In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me
Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name
A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
Adding up the layers of harmony
And so it goes, on and on
Melodies of life,
To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond
So far and away, see the bird as it flies by
Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky
I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings
Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings
In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?
Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?
A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
Adding up the layers of harmony
And so it goes, on and on
Melodies of life,
To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond
If I should leave this lonely world behind
Your voice will still remember our melody
Now I know we'll carry on
Melodies of life
Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts
As long as we remember."
"Why are you scared, Minoru-kun?" Hatoko patted my back. "I told you she wanted you to see this someday. But you never wanted to come here."
Nee-chan knew she was going to die…
I didn't want to come to see the dedication as an act of defiance to her.
I was mad at Nee-chan for lying to me…
Seeing both my sister and Yuzuki next to one another in my mind, I said, "Yuzuki told me to let her go."
That was what ran through my head all this time. I couldn't understand, yet I understood just as much.
"Maybe that's what you have to do." Hatoko said as she looked at Blanche in front of us.
"Why? I need her. And she needs me."
"She sees herself as a shadow, Minoru-kun. The more you see her, the more you see Kaede-san."
"No!" I shouted as my body shook. "I've learned to let go so long ago. I love Yuzuki and I will give up everything else if that's what it amounts to."
"But like your sister, you've to understand that she'll leave you because she doesn't want you to do that." She explained. "Yuzuki's love is just that way."
"I never wanted her to sacrifice anything for my sake."
"Maybe someone else did," Hatoko started to say. "Herself. She's doing this for herself. To discover why would you give up everything for her."
"Because she likes who I am. She doesn't look at me like her master or even a brother. She doesn't want me for money or for power…" My eyes started to pour onto her clothes with my silent sobs while hugging Hatoko closer. "She stopped my loneliness and showed me what it meant to be alive after being dead when Nee-chan died."
"Since she cannot show you through words or emotions, she's showing you something else. That's the difference between your sister and Yuzuki-san. Yuzuki-san is telling you, not because she's weaker, but she is unafraid of being hurt. The most important thing is you, and for you to be hurt is the _only_ thing that would break her."
I told her, "But this is worse, doesn't she know?"
"No, she doesn't know that. That was one thing your sister didn't understand," she said to me as she hugged me even closer.
I mumbled, "Yuzuki…"
"Yuzuki is telling you something is wrong and she's not hiding it from you anymore…"
It was then that I stopped crying and looked at Blanche once more.
"I understand now…" I said as I held onto Hatoko's arms while still looking at Blanche.
She let go of me as her confident smile came back. That meant things were the way they should be.
"Then why are you still here?" She laughed as she pushed me away while wiping away a tear. "I'll take care of your bag."
I began to quickly walk away from her with a loud, "Thank you, Hatoko!"
She slapped her hand on her forehead as people came up to her saying, "Oh my god! It's Suzuka's Deus!!!!"
I ran out into the street like a madman towards my grandmother's house.
She wants me to find her before she runs out of time…
To find her beneath
Her smile…
The true Yuzuki.
Tsuzuku…
--
Author's notes: Yes, I know I'm dragging it out. I thought that I was going to make this much longer, but I guess not. If I drag it out too much, it will wear out its charm. Can I really keep an audience this long? Even I have a short attention span. Thanks for putting up with me!
Damn, I can't help but keep crying on this chapter. * is still crying *