Hello again! Big apologies for yet another hiatus; my chapters are becoming few and far between :( This will be a shorter chapter, sorry guys.
I wanted to let everyone know that I'm planning to do some heavy revision on the earlier chapters of —Restart—. For now, the first 15 chapters. Nothing plot-altering, but I'll be looking for spelling/grammar mistakes and improving sentence flow, along with cutting out early plot points I ended up not going forward with to improve the story's uniformity. So if you read from the beginning and it seems different, that's why.
I apologize in advance for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes I missed in editing. Mild expletive warning.
Please leave comments or critiques! I absolutely love reading them, it's my favorite way to break through a creative block. :)
Have a nice read, and Happy (belated) Halloween!
—Restart—
"another chance"
"No."
The words sliced through the easygoing atmosphere, firm and cold.
Sakura's happy smile faltered at Itachi's words as he stared her down from across the crude fire pit. Jiraiya and Minato turned away from their work with surprise, having busied themselves gutting the fish for dinner.
"Uh…Uchiha-san, you know I can't start my mission until I know everything. I really do need you to tell me why you-…why the Massacre happened," Sakura tread lightly with her words, feeling a jolt of caution run through her.
His chakra signature was always carefully controlled, but now she felt it roiling beneath his skin. "It's of no consequence to you."
"I…I have to disagree. It's the reason why Sasuke grew up so full of hatred," she countered quietly. And she almost didn't say the next part, but something in her expelled it. "If, somehow… I can keep him from hating the village, if I can even avoid the Massacre altogether-"
"You'd have to kill me first. Do you think you're capable of that, even then?" Itachi's words burned her like flames. "You're weak."
The silence that followed was stifling.
After seemingly forever, he rose from his position in front of the fire and slipped into his tent.
"No. And that's final." His parting words left no room for argument.
Feeling her face warm and eyes sting with embarrassment. Sakura kept her sight on her hands, balled up into fists in her lap.
Behind her, Jiraiya and Minato didn't utter a word.
It's been a long, long time since he's doubted himself.
Hand in hand, taking a leisurely pace down empty streets to the Compound, he felt his heartrate quickening and a sweat breaking out on his palm. Even so, he didn't let go.
She was no longer soft and supple to the touch. Calluses and shallow scars marred her tanned skin, and running his thumb along the back of her hand, she was hot and chapped from working in the greenhouse. Even so, he didn't let go.
It feels like his every moment has been infected with her. Waking up in the morning to see her strolling around the Compound. Spending hours in the library together hunched over books. Stretching his chakra to the limits during training together. Being dragged to and fro around the village together.
He wakes up and his first thought is seeing her at training later that day. He goes to sleep thinking about what they'll do together tomorrow.
And though he's spent weeks not admitting it to himself, he's terrified of her sometimes. When she was passed out and bleeding on the bridge in Wave. When she took on that enemy ninja by herself in the forests near Suna.
She walks a fine line between bravery and recklessness, and the thought of something happening to her elicits a full-body reaction, having him wanting to step between her and whatever obstacle she's facing.
Before Team Seven, he knew what he wanted.
He longed to have his brother's blood on his hands, to restore the honor and prosperity of the Uchiha Clan, to leave new members in his place when he's gone.
Anything else, everything else, was insignificant.
But now, the stray thought of leaving, small embers of restlessness in the village stoked by his training's stagnation and sensei's absence have been all but snuffed in the wake of how much stronger he's getting training with Sakura in Konoha, and her tireless efforts lighting a fire under Kakashi as well. His old opinions towards her as a perpetual thorn in his side have been replaced with a protectiveness and respect going far deeper than he'd ever admit. He finds himself smiling more, speaking more, laughing more, feeling more.
Forming bonds again after the massacre had been so relieving, so addicting, he couldn't stop himself from clinging.
Now, when he thinks of his future, he finds himself worrying about leaving his team, a ghost of a concern that'll flitter across his mind's eye. About not making it back to the Village. He wonders if he'll have to go off the grid, or become a nuke-nin all to find That Man.
He wonders if she would hate him for doing that.
The second half of his goal had always seemed like an afterthought, but these days it was all too apparent.
He wasn't sure yet what these feelings were. It felt similar to the rivalry he has with Naruto; a ceaseless flame burning to become stronger, knowing she'd be there to match him. It reminded him of his admiration for Kakashi; watching her create and flawlessly operate a clinic in Wave, destroying an enemy ninja in one punch with the most refined chakra control he's ever seen.
But then, he also thought of his mother, and his father. And though he can't admit it outright, his brother. An intense feeling he could no longer describe, it's been too long since he's felt it.
He's had an idea rolling around in his head for the past few weeks. His very being stubbornly refuses to accept it, but he can feel himself leaning more and more towards it with each passing interaction.
Sneakily, his gaze landed on her. She was taking purposefully slow breaths as they walked, her back ramrod straight and eyes glued to the road. Her usually rosy cheeks were tinged noticeably redder, and she chewed thoughtlessly on her bottom lip.
Maybe one day he'll be able to identify his strange inclination to her. Maybe one day he'll be able fully open up to her, about everything; the massacre, his family, his greatest treasures and his greatest fears. Maybe one day he'd be able to ask her the question that plagues him without clamming up.
But today wasn't that day. And tomorrow wasn't it, either. Nor the next.
The Chūnin Exams, despite everything, held his utmost focus. Because once he hit Chūnin, he could go on missions outside the Village with people other than his Genin team. If he proved skilled enough, he could even go solo.
Finally, finally he could make real headway. He could seek out his brother.
His team needed to pass.
He needed to pass.
The sun had finally set beneath the horizon and Konoha was blanketed by a dark, glittery sky. Absentmindedly, Sakura watched the stars twinkle from the far window. Everyone had already arrived.
As has become commonplace, Team Seven situated themselves in the Uchiha common room, each nursing a cup of steaming tea. But this time, two new faces were here for the discussion.
On one end of the mahogany low table were the young Genin of Team Seven, staring down Smith and Florence from the other end. The atmosphere was a tense one, a tiring conversation dawning.
"Well, I suppose we should make this quick," Smith said, clearing her throat in the silence, "we've all got busy times ahead of us, so. I'll tell you guys what we know."
"Remember how there was a robbery taking place in the Hokage Tower a few weeks ago?" She started.
Naruto frowned, cogs turning in his head. "Don't tell me…"
"No, it wasn't us. But we did take advantage of all the commotion," Smith shared a pensive look with her brother, before turning back to their audience.
"For some reason, Danzo was spooked by the robbery. He ordered all members of our Unit to be moved to secure locations and the hideout sealed from the outside."
"But in all the commotion, we slipped past him and stayed underground while the place was sealed," Florence cut Smith off, his smooth, mature pitch catching Sakura's attention.
With a start, she realized this was the first time she's really heard him speak. Judging by the way Naruto and Sasuke tuned in on either side of her, she wasn't the only one to realize that.
"It was just the two of us inside the whole Unit. We finally had the opening we had been waiting for," he said lightly, his ash-gray eyes dragging across the three of them.
"We searched the Unit for hours, and we dug through everything in HQ. As we expected, this particular Unit didn't have much other than mission reports and stacks of old pictures. But we did end up finding something of value." He looked to his sister.
"There was a file, a relatively old one, in which Danzo personally assigned an S-Rank mission to some soldiers in this Unit," Smith took the reins again.
She opened her mouth to speak, but caught Sasuke's curious eye and choked for a moment. She began wringing her hands together rapidly.
"The mission was assigned…t-the night of the Massacre. Of the Uchiha Massacre."
In an instant, Sasuke's entire body was rigid, and Naruto froze as well. Beneath the cover of the table, two teammates clasped on to each of the Uchiha's unmoving hands.
"The mission didn't explicitly mention the massacre, but the gist of it was assigning a group of ROOT operatives to assist with Itachi Uchiha's escape from Konoha. The job seemed to be planned weeks in advance. And there was never a formal mission report written afterwards; I wouldn't be surprised if they were captured or killed after the job to avoid a paper trail," Smith explained with a small shake to her voice. She always seemed so brash, but a deep sympathy leaked into her tone from dredging up painful memories for Sasuke.
On top of the table, Florence took Smith's hand into his own, and squeezed gently. It was his turn. "This document was not an easy one to find," he said. "I'd assume that it was the only copy made. The Unit we work in isn't even the same one he called the operatives from. He clearly never wanted this to be found; we got very lucky."
Sakura swallowed harshly. A deep sense of dread was filling her at the thought of Danzo worming his way into the inner workings of the Uchiha Massacre as well. She had an inkling that the eventual Massacre was the result of political tensions, but was never told if an influence ran deeper than that.
Her gut was giving her a bleak answer.
"This is hard proof that Danzo assisted a known and wanted terrorist in his crimes," the brother explained. "This incident alone could have him rotting in jail for the rest of his days, but once it inevitably sparks a long overdue investigation, I can't see any fate for him other than the death penalty."
"We've found exactly what we've been looking for," Smith finished, squeezing his hand back.
Sasuke still hadn't breathed. Hadn't spoken, hadn't moved.
"If you have what you need, 'ttebayo…why d'you need us?" Naruto asked, eyes darting over to the Uchiha. Though a valid question, Sakura had already answered it.
Like with most things, there was a catch.
"When we finally found and deciphered the file, it was nearing the end of the lockdown period. The workers in HQ and the Youth ROOT soldiers were going to appear at any second. In the time it took to tidy up and cover our chakra trail, we didn't have any time to copy the file," Smith's voice took on a disappointed lilt near the end. "We ended up putting it back, wiping our signatures from it, and shadow-stepping back into our dorm."
"And when Danzo came back…what happened?" Sakura questioned.
"He never did," Florence focused his heavy gaze on her, piercing despite his thick black bangs. Suddenly, she felt leaden under his watchful eye. "I'd assume he's got more incriminating documents scattered around the village in much more conspicuous places. We were extremely careful when putting everything back, so the file shouldn't have been moved out of the Unit. Though I wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't in the exact same place."
"Now, all we have to do is get it back and copy it," Smith finished for him. She still wrung her hands together, but not as incessantly as before. "But the robbery was a one in a million chance. We may never get handed something like that again. Not unless we create an opening ourselves. So…"
"-you need someone to create a distraction big enough to clear out the basement…" continued Naruto.
"-someone meticulous enough to cover a chakra trail while we break seals open looking for it…" continued Sakura.
"-and someone skilled enough to make a perfect copy of the file." finished Sasuke. There was a fire blazing in his dark eyes. Finally, he squeezed his teammates' hands back.
For a moment, only a moment, a strange expression crossed Sasuke's face. As though he was struggling with something when he glanced at his teammates. But neither one had their focus on him.
But of course, Florence caught it. Imperceptibly, his eyes narrowed.
"…essentially." Smith replied. "Since you guys will end up doing most of the legwork, we're gonna fully take over the planning and preparing for contingencies."
"We're going to be out of the Village in two days, for a week-long mission," Naruto cut in. "We can execute whatever you have planned when we're back."
"It's good that you managed to make some headway," Sakura said, reaching over the table to clasp Smith's fidgeting fingers in her own. "That makes both our jobs easier. When we come back, we'll finish what you started, give it to the Hokage, throw Danzo in jail and get you two out of there," she smiled with deep empathy at the stout girl.
Smith couldn't help smiling back.
There was a low, light chatter in the common room down the hall. No doubt Sasuke and Naruto engaging in endless banter, or Smith badgering them both about something nonsensical. It had been a long day and Sakura didn't care to tune in enough to figure it out.
Seated on the porch in front of the attached training grounds, she let her eyes track the moonlight on the pond water, ever shifting and swaying with each soft gust of wind. She has been retreating into this barely-there state of mind much more often lately. But that has also been so much more to think about.
She knew what her mission was coming back here. She knew the dangers of allowing Sasuke to form bonds in the village, of allowing him to get stronger. Something in her outright rejected the thought of shunning him, of imprisoning him for crimes he hasn't yet committed. Of…killing him.
That familiar stubbornness has risen to the surface once more with a painful reminder Sasuke will be leaving the village very soon. His body's knee-jerk reaction to the mere mention of Itachi's name had Sakura's heart steeling and crumbling all at once, not knowing what to do other than reach out and comfort him with her presence. Despite today's evidence that her efforts to re-wire him are paying off, years of trauma and suspicion because of him don't just disappear.
Even before the War, his abandoning Konoha scarred her more than she'd ever admit, setting off a terrible chain reaction. And she's terrified she'll have to relive that nightmare once more.
And therein lies her dilemma; a question that causes her pause. Smith and Florence are basically dangling a lead to Itachi right in Sasuke's face, and it's obvious he intends to follow through with it. But with one meeting, one interaction, all her hard work could amount to nothing.
Even then, months upon months before she came to this timeline, deep into her training, she had a nagging feeling Itachi wasn't telling her anywhere near the full story of what happened the day he massacred the Uchiha clan. She grew to know him rather well, and he just didn't have the countenance of a murderer. It may have been because he was already dead, but it seemed as though he just didn't have the energy to keep playing his part anymore.
And for months she would wonder: why? Why kill the Uchiha? Why leave Sasuke be? He would only ever give her a vague response: "it's what needed to be done", or "there was no other choice". Her mind would whir with speculations, but past the Uchiha possibly being in the middle of a political battleground, she could never reason the slaughtering of his family to be a solution to their problems.
Maybe that's why, even if they got along, she never was as comfortable with him as she was her other sensei; even with all their relationships entrenched in guilt and blame. Somewhere, deep inside her, she resented him. She was disgusted by him and his choices, and the path of loneliness and isolation and sadness and anger he forced Sasuke to go down. If he could tell, he never uttered a word.
As much as she could blame Minato, or Obito, or even Tsunade and Jiraiya and Kakashi for being a cog in the machine that was the Ninja War, inwardly, she blamed Itachi the most.
But while she was a wishful thinker, she was no idiot. Itachi had never once mentioned working with Danzo in anything while relaying his memory of the timeline. She already knew Naruto and Sasuke would never let this go, especially the latter.
The entire situation felt eerily similar to the shopkeeper's basement in Wave, hijacked by the Youth ROOT operatives. A nostalgic yet mirthless chuckle bubbled up to the surface at the thought. Yet again, they were creeping far down a winding set of stairs into a world they weren't prepared for.
Next week, whatever they're going to find in that basement is going to be something they can't come back from, her gut is telling her that much. She can practically see truths they've always known exploding in their faces.
And she'll do everything in her power to shield her boys from the shrapnel.
There was a loud, discordant creak in the floorboards, disrupting the soft song of the birds and the gurgle of the water. Distantly, Sakura realized the background voices had gone, and was mildly perturbed she hadn't even noticed Florence creeping up on her.
She didn't bother speaking, bother looking as he gracefully sat himself next to her. Her tongue felt heavy in her mouth and the beginnings of a headache pulsed behind her forehead. Not to mention, her shoulders sagged with an oh-so familiar weight.
The silence didn't last long. That was one thing she noted about him (and unconsciously compared to Sasuke), he wasn't much for quiet contemplation. "I noticed something about your teammate while we were talking earlier," he mumbled softly, using his thumb to lightly trace the outline of his opposite hand. So they've both got a physical quirk. "He's not being completely truthful with you and the blond one."
"Naruto," Sakura supplied quietly.
"Right. When we were delegating tasks, he…a weird look crossed over his face. Like he wanted to mention something but wasn't sure if he should," Florence continued.
"Maybe that's a normal dynamic for you three, I'm not sure. But you should look into whatever he's hiding before the operation begins."
"Thank you for telling me," she replied, somewhat robotic. The way he spoke made her unsure of a proper answer, so she went with a default. "It's thoughtful of you."
There were a few moments of silence between the two. Sakura could feel his countenance buzzing next to her with curiosity. Now, she found a similarity in him to Naruto. "What is it?" She broke the quiet eventually.
"Im looking forward to leaving ROOT and getting Danzo punished," he started. "Im not sure what I'll do afterwards, though. Maybe I'll ask the Hokage to gather up what recruits still have some soul left in them to be reintegrated. Hmm, seems like a good idea," he trailed off momentarily, fingers absentmindedly tracing a strong jaw. And suddenly she was reminded of herself, and her tendency to get lost in thought.
His eyes snapped to her and his fingers paused. "Anyway. I don't know why you joined ROOT but you'll have to find some other pastime when it's disbanded. Any ideas yet?"
A meager conversation starter, her mind supplied. "I'll continue training for the Chūnin Exams this winter."
"And after?"
"Hopefully when I become chūnin, I'll focus my attention on a hospital apprenticeship, and rack up solo missions for the Jounin Exams."
"After?"
"…I'll be a jounin, ideally with my team, and I'll finish my hospital apprenticeship."
"And then?"
And for the first time since he sat down, Sakura turned her whole body to really stare at him.
He was clearly a year or three older, if the lack of baby fat and freshly-shaven jaw were any indication. Most of his inky black hair was pulled high into a ponytail, thick and full and shiny (she felt a mild pang of jealousy), but his pronounced jawline and thick, carved brows were hidden by full bangs and a messy fringe.
His nose had an unusually rounded bridge for Konoha citizens, and his lips were fuller than what's common. But his eyes were a familiar almond shape, in a familiar ashy grey color.
Sakura, after years of dissecting and staring at teenage boys, couldn't help asking. "Where are you from, originally?"
"Surprisingly, he laughed, a deep rumbling sound showing off a set of straight pearly whites. "My mother actually hailed from Kumo, but my father was from Konoha. So, I've been told I look a little out of place."
"Just a bit." Sakura felt some tension in her shoulders ease at his laugh, reminding her that past his weird quirks and quiet countenance, he was just a person. "So, Smith had lots of praises to sing about your fighting style. Mind filling me in?"
"Ah, right," he ran an absent hand up and down his arm. "Mi-Smith can't fight the way I do, so she's always raving about it," he said. "My style revolves heavily around chakra control."
Unbidden, Sakura's eyebrows shot up. "Me too! But I use it mostly for medical ninjutsu and chakra-enhanced taijutsu. What about you?"
"Hmm…not sure how clearly I can explain this. I kind of…infect people with chakra. Similar to how a Hyūga forcibly closes tenketsu, I force abrasive chakra into an enemy's chakra system and shut down their chakra coils. They can't produce any more chakra, they can't mold whatever's left, and it electrocutes them from the inside out. And get this," he said, raising a single finger, the tip sparking with energy. "It just takes a single touch."
"…I've never heard of anyone being able to do that before," Sakura breathed, suddenly feeling intimidated. No one had ever been able to match her level of control other than Tsunade. "You'd need perfect, truly perfect control to mesh two different chakra signatures, go searching for the chakra coils and destroy them. And with how unruly charged chakra can be? All in a second?"
"Impressed?" He smiled widely at the praise. "It took years upon years to perfect. But of course, that's not all; i need a strong defense too, so my Lightning element and old fashioned taijutsu are in my arsenal."
"Teach me."
"Hm?"
"Teach me how to infect people."
"That's gonna be a hard no," he said, throwing his head back. "All the hard work I put in? Yeah, this is dying with me. Just make one yourself."
Make one herself.
Make one herself?
It was like she was finally seeing the light.
That's why she couldn't choose an independent study. She's seen it all, dabbled in it all; she needs something new. Something completely personal.
And she already had an idea of where to start.
"I can see the gears turning in your head," he commented.
"Hmm, just a bit."
There was a beat of silence.
"I'm not telling you, so don't even try it."
He frowned playfully. "But I told you mine!"
"And I thank you for that! Maybe I'll let you know once I finish it." And then, she adopted a conspiratorial smirk. "You're gonna be so jealous."
"I doubt you can top mine, but I'll bite. Think you can have it done by the time you're back?"
Sakura pretended to think. She wasn't certain, but she definitely had the work ethic for it. "What'll I get out of it?"
For a moment, he looked away. And when he turned back, there was a glint in his eyes. "How about a solid? You can ask for anything, and cash it at any time."
"Deal."
They stared at each other for a moment, before sharing a liberating laugh.
"I feel better," she admitted, offering him a grateful smile. "Thank you."
"Ah, don't mention it." He offered her a smile of his own. "Good luck on your trip."
There was a discordant creak in the floorboards, and both ninjas turned around to see Sasuke standing in the doorway with an blank expression on his face, eyes flitting between them before landing on Florence, boring into him heavily.
Suddenly, Sakura was made aware of just how close she had gotten to Florence throughout their conversation, scooting to make some distance between them before standing. "Hey," she said, a little breathlessly.
"Hn." It took Sasuke a moment to drag his eyes away, but eventually he did with a hard set to his jaw. "Meeting's over."
There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment, before Florence quietly stood. "I guess that's my cue," and as he walked back into the house, he dragged a hand down Sakura's arm in passing. "See ya," he said with a smile, giving Sasuke a curt nod before leaving.
"Well." Absentmindedly, the roseate touched along the path his fingers made. "I should go too. My mom's gonna need all the help she can get for food prep-"
"Are you blushing?"
Green eyes snapped to meet black. His eyes were slightly wide, scanning her face. Suddenly self-conscious, her fingers touched her cheeks. "I don't think so? I'm just a bit warm. Why?"
His face almost looked confused, before he averted his eyes to the hallway. "Hn. Forget it, I'll walk you out."
There it was again, that almost painful clench to his jaw.
As they walked to the exit, Naruto and the siblings already gone, Sakura filed this interaction away to obsess over later. There was still so much to do before the training trip commenced; she had to stay focused.
Her eyes rolled skyward upon exiting the home to marvel at the twinkling stars, and at the same time, Sasuke's gaze lingered on her retreating form.