A/N: WARNING: I never thought I would say this but there's disciplinary spanking here. I know, cringe right? It seemed fine at the time to write it but now I just want to bring a hammer down on my phone and jump out of the balcony. But it's not as if I can pull off a whole ass new chapter XD
Jasper has spent a lot of time getting burned by sunlight until it felt like his skin was melting off his bones. He had been force-fed vervain until it felt like lava was flooding his insides, and he kept throwing up even after his stomach was empty. He'd had to smell garlic until he passed out. Not slept until it drove him to the edge of madness. Hell, he had even choked on venom a couple times.
But not once had he ever seen his skin become pinkish like it was now; he had never known anything to hurt like this. Even the air was making his skin sting worse than any sunburn he had ever had.
What the hell was this?
It was on most of the left side of his body, on his hands. Why? What was even this?
The sound of someone knocking on the door made him flinch and pull his still damp shirt back down. He was quick to get to the door and open it, which was a bit difficult with his hands being so... not good.
He was met with Carlisle's stern face as soon as he opened the door, and something about his expression made Jasper's stomach clench.
Even more so due to the streaks of doubt and resolution in his emotions and the sadness in Esme's.
Something's gonna happen.
He knew that look.
That was the look of someone about to inflict punishment.
How did he know? Good question. Because that was not the expression Maria wore whenever she was about to punish him. Hers was full of malice. Glee.
Still, as calm as Carlisle looked and felt, Jasper almost slammed the door in their faces as this realization sank in. Carlisle was gonna punish him.
Not grounding.
Not harsh words.
Punishment .
Physical.
Punishment.
With Esme present.
Or was she the one who would punish him?
Both of them?
It wouldn't be the first time he'd been beaten by multiple people at once.
Still.
As much as he wanted to take off, all he did was step aside.
-Come in.
Carlisle and Esme stepped into the room and sat at the edge of the bed. Jasper stood awkwardly in front of them with his hands behind his back. He didn't want to sit; his jeans were killing him as it was without pressing them against him more like would happen if he sat. It felt as if, with each passing second, the pain was getting worse and worse, until it felt like his entire body was hot to the touch and throbbing. Were he not used to hiding his pain, his leg would be shaking.
The idea that he would have to face even more pain made his throat close.
-Sweetheart, please do come sit with us.
-I would rather stand, ma'am.- Jasper's shoulders were tense, his hands behind his back and head ducked.
That attitude was rather odd, for while Jasper wasn't one to get in trouble that much, Carlisle and Esme had thought they had gotten past this; the boy knew no one would hurt him. And even if that soldier-like stance wasn't something new, he had never ducked his head while standing like that.
It made their chests tighten and their resolution waver, but they couldn't let that happen. Carlisle and Esme had come to the agreement that they had to stop coddling him, for that would do nothing but make Jasper believe he could do whatever he wanted without facing any consequences.
He had a complicated past, yes.
But that didn't mean he was going to get privileges and skip punishments. That's not how things worked.
And while it pained them, it had to be done. They refused to keep putting this off over their own fears of losing Jasper if they were too harsh with him.
Still.
Carlisle tried to use a softer tone of voice.
-Jasper, no one is going to hurt you. We just want to talk. Sit down.
For a moment, Jasper didn't react to his words.
Then, he sat between them as requested. Esme rested her hand on his arm.
-You do realize how reckless you were today, right?- She scolded him. He ducked his head even more at her words.
-I know. It was stupi,d and I apologize for the trouble I caused. It was never my intention to cause property damage.- Jasper mumbled, his hands gripping the hem of his shirt.
-It's not just about the property damage, Jasper. I told you before, didn't I? Flying is out of the question. Even more so when you are purposely trying to get the humans' attention. You know perfectly well that it is against the rules. Do you realize the danger you put us all in every time you chose to fly? This is not a game.
-I know. I'm sorry, sir.
-Being sorry isn't enough. You knew the rules, and you still went behind our backs to do the one thing you have been warned not to do. You knew it was wrong, but you still did it anyway. You disobeyed us. You caused damage in a Church because of it, and on top of that, you put your lives in danger by being so close to fire.
Jasper didn't answer.
-You are a good boy, Jasper. And smart. You should know by now to not go along with Emmett's games. Why did you do it?- Emmett had told them that he had been the one to drag Jasper out of the house. That Jasper had just wanted to keep reading that "boring" book, but that Emmett wouldn't leave him alone.
Still.
That didn't erase Jasper's wrongdoings, for he was old enough to be able to decide for himself. He knew it was wrong, and he had still done it.
Esme's answer was a shrug from Jasper.
-Jasper, I asked you a question.
Silence.
And then.
-I did it 'cause I miss it, alright? It's the only time I don't have to watch my back. I'm the one in control of what happens around me... I understand that what I did was wrong. I know it was reckless an' stupid an' that an apology would hold no meanin' if a human had actually seen us, but I don't regret doing so.
Niether NeitherCarlisle nor Esme had been expecting that answer,. It had never crossed their minds that Jasper would miss flying, but if they gave it some thought, of course it would be natural for him to miss it.
Even so, that didn't excuse his behavior.
-Look, I understand why you did what you did, but that's no reason to act so reckless. I have told you before: you need to be responsible. If you want to fly, that's fine; I won't hold you down. I'm just asking you to be mindful of where and how you do it.
-I know, and I'm sorry, but you don't have to worry; I won't fly again. After today, it's clear I'm no longer fit for flying.- His words were neutral, but Carlisle and Esme could see how much it actually bothered him that he was no longer able to fly.
-I'm sorry sweetheart.- Esme said softly. She squeezed his arm in comfort.
Jasper, for his part, had to bite back a wince at the gesture.
-It's fine. I knew it would happen sooner or later.- He didn't want their pity; he had known this would happen.
He had known.
And while it did bother him, the idea of losing his greatest escape method, he also knew it was for the best.
He didn't need it, and even so, he knew that in order to keep said talent, he would need to torture himself with human blood.
It wasn't worth it.
He was fine like this.
-Jasper, we understand why you did it, but that doesn't mean we are okay with it.
-I know.
-You are old enough to understand what we ask of you. You knew what you were doing was wrong. You could have said no to Emmett.
-I know.
Jasper was fighting, and failing, to not inch away from Carlisle and closer to Esme. His skin burned too much, God, and what the hell was this?
-We have been patient. Understanding. But this isn't something we can let go of with a simple scolding. You have shown us that us being lenient was for nothing. Your disobedience even after being warned shows us that words aren't enough.
-I'm sorry.- His voice came out weaker than intended as he got up.
-Sit down.- The order was so absolute Jasper did so out of reflex, biting back a flinch as that caused his hip to flare with agony; his skin was killing him. The pain was getting to the point where he wanted to tear his skin apart if that meant getting rid of the throbbing. Of the burning. God, what was this?
-Please.- He pleaded. He could take a beating, pain was an old friend, but this... God, this was worse than being burned by the sunrise . If he took a beating right now, he feared he would break with the first hit.
-No. You have been given a lot of chances. You need to understand that your actions have consequences.- Carlisle was proud at how stern his voice came out, even though his heart was being torn apart. Knowing he was responsible for such pleading and the frightened look on his son's face was too much.
But he had to be harsh.
Because if Jasper did something like this again and a human saw him...
The Volturi would come for them. He had to think about the safety of his whole family.
-Does she need to be present?- Jasper wasn't proud of his pathetic tone, but if he was going to be punished by Carlisle, then he didn't want Esme here.
He didn't want her to watch.
-Yes.
At his miserable look, Carlisle was quick to explain.
-I need you to understand something: her presence here is not for your humiliation; it's for her own comfort and yours.
Carlisle's words did make sense... Sort of. With time, Jasper had been able to learn the other's histories.
Esme's included.
It would make sense she would want to be present when one of her children was being ̶b̶̶e̶̶a̶̶t̶̶e̶̶n̶ punished. For her peace of mind. Even if she trusted Carlisle, she would still need to be present for her comfort.
And while part of him still found it humiliating, another part of him felt... at ease. He trusted her with his life.
Having her here... He knew she would stop Carlisle.
Mates or not, Esme would never allow an unfair ̶b̶̶e̶̶a̶̶t̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶ punishment.
She would stop him.
And it's not like he hadn't been subjected to worse things in front of an entire crowd before.
He could stand her. Even more so if her presence was just for comfort.
-It's alright darling. But if you really want me to leave-
-No.- He couldn't help grabbing her arm and giving her a pleading look.- Stay.
-If that's what you want, then I will stay.- Esme assured him softly, her hand coming to rest against his cheek. It could be her imagination, but she could swear he felt warm.
-Now come lay down.- Carlisle ordered, pulling on the boy's arm and guiding him to lay down across his lap. He was as still as a statue, his movements stiff, and Carlisle couldn't help but massage his back. If he was going to do this, he needed him to be as calm and relaxed as possible.
Because he didn't have to be a genius to know how bad things could go if this became too much for Jasper to handle.
He could freak out just as easily as he could become aggressive.
And Carlisle didn't want either of those things to happen.
So he rubbed his back and focused on the comfort he was aiming for.
-You are alright. You are safe here. You know I would never harm you on purpose, right?
A short nod was his answer.
-You understand the reasons behind this punishment, right?
Another nod.
-You will not try to shield yourself with your hands; I don't want to accidentally hurt you. Keep your hands to yourself.- Carlisle warned him as he kept rubbing his hand across his back.
But Jasper was still too tense for comfort.
In fact.
He was shaking.
-Jasper, I won't hurt you.- He repeated, but that didn't stop the shaking.
-I know.- The voice was strained and small, and Carlisle had to harden his heart in order to not give in. He could feel Jasper's fear prickling against his skin, threatening to merge with his own emotions.
-Jasper, you are projecting.
-Sorry.
Jasper was fighting and failing to keep himself sane over the torture of his skin. Being in this position only worsened the pain on his hip and side. His thigh. Knee. God, it hurt . And he wanted nothing more than to get up.
As if this position wasn't humiliating enough.
Carlisle's hand on his back, along with the calm and comfort he projected, at least served to crush some of his rising panic. Esme's presence. comforted him even more
But the idea of being hit was too much. But he couldn't protest.
He deserved this for going against Carlisle and Esme's orders.
That didn't mean he didn't attempt to escape the second he felt the first hit. Panic flared in him along with the pain and an overwhelming sense of danger. But he didn't manage to escape, for an arm wrapped around his waist, bringing him back to his original position before he could successfully get away.
-That's enough. You will behave.- It wasn't a request.
It was a statement of fact.
-Sorry.
The second hit was worse, for it came down right on top of one of the spots where his skin was searing.
He bit back the shout that threatened to come out. He had taken worse than this. He could take a few swats. He was fine. Fine. He. Was. Fine.
So he bit back each shout and sound before they could come out. Each hit blazed more and more against his skin. Harsher. Worse. But he took it.
He took each hit without protest.
Maria always said that one must be ready to face the consequences of their actions, to not be a baby when those consequences came calling.
He was a man, a soldier. He could take a few hits.
Or, at least, he should have been able to.
But one particular hit came down right on the most agonizing place on his skin. It felt worse than having his skin burned by the sunrise.
He nearly failed to hold back the shout he ached to release, a strangled noise leaving him instead as tears blurred his vision. He didn't even notice he had bitten himself until he felt Carlisle stop.
-Jasper, Jasper stop that.
But he couldn't stop. His fangs digging into his already blazing forearm froze him completely. The pain was too much for him to deal with right now.
And then he became too numb to react; Carlisle's voice fell away to faded tosomewhere in the background, and the emotions around him blurred.
Something moved, but he wasn't quite sure what. Someone was talking. Sort of. It felt as though a weight had settled over him, muddling the world outside, and he didn't care about it. Peace was good. Quiet. Silence. Silence. Numbness. Numb. Numbness. No pain. Nothing. Nothing. Numbness.
It took him a while before he was able to get out of this deadened state.
The second he did so, he wished he hadn't.