A/N: Hey guys! Back with a long one, hope you like it!
He was sunshine
-.-
When Annabeth first walked into the halls of Goode High, he'd almost blinded her.
Standing by a locker, talking to a friend, all he'd done was smile, and yet it felt like a light had illuminated the dim halls. Or at least, that's how she had penned it in her journal later that day.
The easiest writing, she's learned, is when it's real. The words flowed like rain and so she sought him out over and over again.
Her microwave beeps, breaking her out of her thoughts. The floor feels cold beneath her feet as she pads over to it to take out her now-reheated coffee from earlier. It doesn't taste that good, but it's familiar, which is why she does it.
And on nights like these, she needs familiar. Sometimes it feels like nothing is familiar anymore, that there's nothing left of what was before all this.
She takes a seat in her armchair by the window and stares into the midnight sky. The rain patters against the pane, lulling her into a haze.
"Hey, I noticed you looking at me."
She feels her cheeks heat up in embarrassment. What's worse, that she got caught or that she had actually been trying to be discreet?
"Sorry."
He smiles and it's even brighter up close. Where does it all come from? she wonders briefly, before listening to his response.
"It's okay, I was just wondering why?"
So bold. It leaves her speechless for a second because how can someone be so honest, so open? It takes confidence to walk up to someone you noticed looking at you and ask them why. (She would have never done it, anyway.)
"Um.." How does she describe her attraction to him, like a moth to a flame. It's pure fascination.
"You have a nice smile," she finishes. It's not a lie, and she can't get more embarrassed anyway, so why bother trying to save face now.
"Really? Thanks!" He flashes her another one of his smiles. It comes from within, she realizes, that light she's been trying to figure out.
"I'm Percy, by the way."
Percy. You could write a book with that name. (Well, she was going to write a song anyway).
"Annabeth, nice to meet you." Because apparently this is what they're doing now.
"Annabeth," he repeats, as if tasting the way her name feels in his mouth. "That's unique."
"So is Percy," she replies. His eyes, she's just realized when he tilted his head, are a gorgeous green. That's a whole verse right there.
He sits down across from her, fully committing to the conversation.
"Well, it's short for Perseus because my mom…"
She can tell you the gist of what he had said, but what had captivated her more was the way he spoke, excited and shining. And the way he made her feel, a warmth she didn't know she needed.
Taking a sip of her coffee, she wonders if he knows just how many of her songs are about him. Pages upon pages of lyrics that the world has never seen. Her phone buzzes and she glances at it. The notification was a tweet, but the unopened text from her producer is what catches her eye.
She has to go into the studio tomorrow and it's past midnight at this point. If only she could fall asleep. But the rain always washes in old memories.
Forcing herself up, she makes her way to her bedroom. She can at least try to sleep. But the blank paper and pen lying on it reminds her why she walked away in the first place.
The song just won't come out.
Maybe it's the memories of him filling up her mind that makes her go to the back of her closet and pull out her old journals. The ones from high school.
She flips it open to a random page and reads the line.
My boy is a montage…
"Come on!"
"You're crazy!" she yells back, resisting his tug. "No one actually does this!"
He just grins at her. "I do."
And then he lets go of her hand and steps out onto the beach. Within fifteen seconds the rain has drenched his clothes and he spreads his arms out wide, turning to her with one of those smiles that rival the sun.
"Come on, Annabeth!" he calls out.
It's like something off a film screen. She steps out from under the shelter they'd been standing under, hesitant at first, then runs to him.
He scoops her up and she can't help but laugh.
"You're insane."
He just smiles at her. "Don't you want a romantic kiss under the rain like in the movies?"
When he kisses her, she drowns and soars at the same time. She writes a poem about it on their drive home, words that would've become lyrics.
That's how it was like with Percy. A montage of moments sprinkled through time, a love she hasn't unraveled until right this moment. She picks up her guitar, strumming a few chords.
The day she showed him her music was the beginning of the end.
"Annabeth, this is really good," he had said with wide, unreadable eyes. "You're going to make it."
He smiles and she should have known then that he was convinced of her success.
Because there was sadness behind the smile.
He wanted it comfortable, I wanted that pain
The words on the page mock her as she reads them. Pain is what she had gotten. She'd made it, but at what cost?
"I believe in you, Annabeth," he says with a sad smile. The wind feels cold in the empty parking lot of their now-old high school. The bustling of graduation over a few days ago had just left them…empty.
"I know they'll take you," he says. She's leaving tomorrow, driving out to a record label to give her dreams a shot.
She wonders if he hadn't said those words, if they hadn't taken her. Percy had always supported her dreams. It was her that had failed to support his.
He wanted kids, a quiet life with a house and white picket fence and pancakes in the morning. All the things she couldn't give him.
"I'm sorry," she says, tears starting to blur her vision. Sorry for not being who he'd wanted.
"Don't be," he says, attempting a smile. "It's okay."
She doesn't think it is.
"Good luck, Annabeth."
"Good luck, Percy."
But it'd actually meant goodbye.
The lyrics fly easily after that and she pours them out onto a page, saying everything she never could through the early hours of the morning until the sun comes up, leaving her cold, empty, and exhausted.
-.-
"Daddy!" his son screams, making him whip around in a panic only to find him delightedly holding up a cookie.
"Can I eat this?"
How his son has room for a cookie after the affair that breakfast had been, he doesn't know, but the relief overpowers every other emotion and he nods his approval.
Turning back to his survey of the sink (it's still a mess), he wonders if he has enough time to make a dent in the dishes before he needs to get Noah ready for school. It's moments like this he really wishes he had another set of hands to help.
Having a kid had always been his dream (though maybe not quite like this) and most of the time he doesn't mind being a single parent at all. Sure, it had been rough in the beginning, with transitioning out of college and working, but his mom had been there to help. And now he's got a good routine going. But sometimes he wishes…
"I'm sorry," Rachel says in the same matter-of-fact way she says everything. The only thing that betrays her tone is the way her eyes seem suspiciously shiny. In the two and half years he's known her, he's never seen her cry.
"What do you mean?" he asks. But he knows. Knows deep down that despite the way she'd persevered through her pregnancy and graduated college, that she can't do it. She'd tried, but there's no way that these few months of domesticity would last.
"You know what I mean," she says, reading his mind. "I'm sorry that I can't do it."
It's the other shoe he's been waiting to drop this whole time, he can't even say he's surprised.
"It's okay."
He's not sure if he's reassuring her or himself.
Rachel shakes her head. "It's not. I should have said so before all this."
'All this' being the baby. He'd tried to push away his thoughts and leave it all up to her. Though it was unexpected and bad timing, it was good enough where she had been able to graduate on time. She'd had a few months to try this out.
And honestly, he appreciates the effort.
"You gave me a son," he says. He really can't ask for anything else.
She just nods back. An acknowledgement of his unspoken thanks. They both turn to the unfinished painting leaning against the wall.
"I'm sorry," she repeats.
It's the night he realizes he has a type.
When Rachel leaves a few days later, he's upset, but not as heartbroken as thought he would be. He waves from the window and she waves back, already looking lighter having stepped out of the apartment.
He's never held it against her.
"Daddy." Noah tugs at his pants. "School."
Right. He has a kid to dress and drive to school. The dishes are untouched, as he shakes himself out of his thoughts and shepherds his son into his room.
Thankfully, he's got Noah dressed and ready in record time. It's not a long drive, but Percy doesn't want to be late. (Something about prepping your kid for success that he'd read in a parenting book a while ago.)
"Do you know what you're going to do today?" he asks Noah, as he drives. (As if it isn't just pre-school he's going to).
"Miss Emma said we'll do music!"
Miss Emma is one of three other teachers managing the class and Noah's favorite. He glances at his son in the rearview mirror.
"That sounds like fun."
Noah is grinning widely, the way his mom had told him looks just like him when he was young. He can see it. Somehow, Noah ended up being an exact copy of him, black hair, green eyes, crooked smile, the only traces of Rachel are in his nose and jawline.
Maybe he shouldn't be, but he's grateful Noah looks like him. Not that he has ill-will towards his ex-girlfriend, but it really makes Noah feel like his son.
One of the assistant teachers walks up to the car as he helps Noah out of his carseat and he waves goodbye until they disappear into the building. His drive home is silent, as usual, but he's had enough of his thoughts today so he puts on the radio.
Can I ask you a question, did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room?
Her voice is a direct strike on his heart. It always is. And all of a sudden he's gone again, lost in the time where her touch would ignite the love they shared.
When the only thing that could calm him was her kiss, the only thing that could soothe him were her words.
He tunes back into them, actually listening to the chorus now playing again.
Can I ask you a question, did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room?
Like that summer party in the Stolls' backyard, he turns around and there she is on her tiptoes, planting a kiss on his lips out of nowhere.
And every single one of your friends was making fun of you
There's laughter but it's quickly drowned out by the feel of her lips and the sound of his heart beating too loud in his ears.
But fifteen seconds latеr, they were clapping, too?
The Stolls' wolf whistles make them break apart, blushing and giddy.
Thеn what did you do?
"You're officially my girlfriend now, right?" he asks her when they walk away from the crowd.
She rolls her eyes fondly. "I thought the kiss covered that."
He grins, unable to hide his excitement, unable to hide anything when it comes to her . "I don't know…maybe you should try again."
Her involuntary laughter is always the best, and she shoves him away slightly, rolling her eyes. Her hand never lets go of his, though.
He laughs along with her.
"—Annabeth Chase's Question, Ed Sheeran, Katy Perry, and more to come right after this break."
He's home. He missed the rest of the song.
It's a song that's relatively new, so he hasn't actually listened to it. As a rule, he doesn't really listen to Annabeth's music too often. Not because it's bad, it's as fantastic as it's always been, but he has a tendency (like just now) to relate everything she sings back to them. Back to him.
It's impossible because she has been in a few other relationships since theirs (it would make sense since it's been seven years) if the media is to be believed.
But given this tendency, he ends up carving out one night every few months or so to drink wine and listen to her songs and let himself pretend it's about them and that he's someone that would even still be in her mind. (Which he knows is likely not true).
The sunlight hits his neck instead of his eyes when he ends up back at the sink full of dirty dishes, which he considers a win. Though it does make him feel uncomfortably warm. (Then again, he runs hot, as everyone who's ever used his hand for heat in the winter has always said.)
It's true though, he does run hot, and sometimes he wishes he could just cool down. And not just his body, but his overactive mind that has a tendency to run too much for his liking sometimes. (Like today.)
He's got fifteen minutes before he has to start work and the dishes need to be done and the laundry loaded into the washer. With only four minutes left, he finally manages to make it to the pile of things from Noah's bag sitting on the counter.
One of the papers is a newsletter from the school announcing some upcoming projects and events, one in particular, catches his eye.
"Mommy and Me Lunch, this Thursday!"
His heart falls when he reads it. More than himself, he wishes Noah had someone else. Of course, he won't be the only one who's mom won't come (it's a work day, after all) but still, if only…
The thing he's realized from moments like this, is it's not necessarily Rachel he wishes were here. (Obviously, it would be good if she was, but Noah was too young to know her before she left and she wasn't the type for this anyway).
But if only there was someone. Logistically, he knows, in order for there to be someone, he needs to start looking for a relationship again (as his mother always reminds him) but he just can't bring himself to do that.
He has a type.
And the type isn't really the mothering kind. His thoughts drift back to Annabeth.
She'd straight up told him her plans. Rachel on the other hand had left, but tried. It's not a line of thought he likes going down because ultimately what's important is that he has Noah.
But sometimes he can't help but think of Annabeth. Did you wish you put up more of a fight…?
His work alarm rings and he shakes his head, pushing aside the flood of thoughts and memories to focus on that instead.
-.-
"New song," she tells Leo as soon as she walks into the studio, sleep-deprived and slowly going crazy.
"But what about—"
"No, I need to get this one out." It's starting to eat at her honestly. Thankfully, Leo's worked with her for long enough to know it's better to go along with her.
Some of her best songs have come out this way.
She wonders if this is going to be one of them. And if it is, if he'd ever hear it. Does he even listen to her music? He was the first to tell her it was good enough, that she was good enough, to make it.
But after seven years, does he care?
And he never thinks of me, except when I'm on TV…
"Alright," Leo says, turning towards the soundboard. "What is it?"
She picks up her guitar and starts.
-.-
"Annabeth Chase's new single, Midnight Rain!"
He was sunshine, I was midnight rain
He wanted it comfortable, I wanted that pain
He wanted a bride, I was making my own name
Chasing that fame
He stayed the same
All of me changed like midnight…
He freezes, eyes unable to leave the TV screen. It's some talk show that he's never really watched before, but there she is, performing live and training her cloudy grey eyes onto the camera.
It's the first time he's seeing her on video in a while. Somehow, she looks the same. But with each word she sings, her eyes look heavier, and he clings to her words the way he used to cling to her lips.
By the end of the song he's sitting there in shock. He's not even wine-tipsy this time and he's ready to swear up and down that—
"Tell us about Midnight Rain, how did it come to be?" The interviewer is asking.
"Well, as the title suggests it was a rainy midnight and I was reminded of my old journals," Annabeth begins to answer. "As I was flipping through, I found some phrases that I just felt needed to be a whole song."
"Oh wow, so you mentioned old journals, this song seems to be about your past?"
He waits for her answer in an embarrassing bated breath.
There's a slight hesitation before she answers the question. "Yeah, I had written the phrase back in high school, but I only made it into a whole song recently. It's a story about two people wanting different things, which I think everyone has experienced in some way."
She didn't answer the question entirely, but it's clear anyway. Close enough for him.
"You mentioned that this person doesn't think of you, except when you're on TV. Well, you're on TV now, do you have anything to say to them?"
Annabeth looks a little taken back at the question, but recovers as quickly as she always had. Whether it's live TV or a sudden chemistry question in class, she answers gracefully.
"Well, like I said the concept is two people wanting different things, and the wonder of what could've been. So I'd say most people would have well-wishes, or…" there's a slight pause as she smiles, clearly gearing up for something. "I just may like to have a conversation."
There's cheering at that and she smiles out into the audience.
The talk show hosts also claps, sporting a smile and—
"Percy Jackson?"
He looks up at the door to see the dental assistant call his name. Right.
He's here for his dental appointment.
As if his entire world hasn't been flipped upside down. It's the only time he's been glad to not have the ability to speak because his mind is racing with too many thoughts, and his heart thumping with too many feelings, too many hopes.
-.-
"Who's it about?" Leo asks her, handing her a box of takeout. It's another late night at the studio which means dinner is Chinese. She eagerly grasps it, stomach remembering that she's hungry.
"What?"
Leo turns to her, opening his own box. "Midnight Rain. I didn't ask while recording but after that interview…who's it about?"
"I didn't say it was about anyone."
Leo shoots her a look. "It's pretty obvious, now tell me."
She shoves a forkful of noodles in her mouth to buy time, pushing back a sigh. Writing has always been therapeutic in a way, she writes to get things out of her system. But ever since Midnight Rain, it's had the opposite effect.
She's ended up thinking about Percy more and more as the melody plays in her head.
"A guy I dated in high school," she finally answers.
"Was it exactly like your lyrics, he wanted to get married?" Leo asks, taking a bite of his food.
She actually sighs this time. Might as well answer his questions, maybe it'll help get it off her chest.
"His dream was to have kids. He wanted that white picket fence life…"
"And you were trying to catch your big break," Leo fills in.
She nods. "I knew I couldn't give that to him." A part of her still wishes she could have. He was good, he deserved better.
"Do you not want kids?" Leo asks, making her turn towards him in surprise.
"Um…I mean, I hadn't thought about it. I was focused on my music."
"But what about now?"
Now that she's made it, now that she's accomplished her dream, now that things are different…
"Well, it's too late now, I'm sure he already has kids."
Leo slowly looks up from his food, something unreadable in his eyes. "I mean in general," he says slowly. "I wasn't talking about him…"
The realization of what she's just said hits her and she ducks her head down to avoid further eye contact. But it's too late to avoid the embarrassment.
"Annabeth…" Leo starts. "Do you…?"
"He's just been on my mind because of the song," she cuts him off before he can continue. Red tingers her cheeks and she shoves another forkful of food just to try to circumvent it.
"But you've never said anything remotely like that with the other guys you've dated."
"The two guys I dated, you mean? I mean they were…"
She'd never really considered kids, but definitely not with them. The only person she'd ever met who was good father material was Percy.
If anyone would make her a wife or a mother it would have been him. She doesn't think she would do it for anyone else. (Well, she didn't do it for him either, but definitely no one else).
And there she goes again, thinking about him.
"Have you reached out to him since?"
He'd sent her a good luck text the day after their breakup and she'd responded with a thank you. That was the last thing she ever said to him, and in a way it was fitting.
She'd made the assumption that he never wanted to see her again anyway, since she'd fallen short as a girlfriend and hadn't reached out since.
It's been seven years.
"No."
"Not even looked him up?"
Once.
One a drunk midnight, she'd given into curiosity (or the cheap ass rosé) and looked him up. The last thing he'd posted was a picture of some college party, his arm around a girl that's probably his wife now or something. It had been enough to deter her from trying again.
"Not really."
Before Leo can ask another question, she continues. "It's not that big of a deal, I'm telling you it's just because of the song, I don't think about him that often."
Which isn't a lie. Except lately, he's all but taken over her mind.
"Anyway," she pushes aside her food to pick up her guitar, "we've got a song to finish."
Leo looks at her for a second with something she can't decipher before finally responding with a simple. "Okay."
-.-
"Daddy!" His son's excited squeals when he goes to pick him up from preschool are the highlight of his day.
"Hey buddy!" he responds, pulling Noah into a hug.
"He's been excited to see you," Noah's teacher, who he recognizes as Miss Emma, says with a smile.
"I've been excited to see him too," he responds with a smile, patting Noah's head.
Miss Emma, or Emma as he should probably call her, smiles back, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear as she does. Something on her wrist glints against the light and he notices an owl pendant on her bracelet.
"Are you an Annabeth Chase fan?"
He doesn't know why he says that, why he remembers the bracelet as part of her merch line from a while back, why he can't fail to forget that owls have been her thing since sophomore year.
Emma turns to him surprised. "I am…how'd you know?"
He tries not to look too embarrassed as he replies, "Your bracelet…"
She holds up her wrist and the diamond-like gems in the owl's eyes seem to stare directly into his soul.
"Wow, I can't believe you recognized it! You must be a fan!"
A fan of the way her lips used to feel against his and how she'd comb her fingers through his hair when they cuddled and holy shit—that's a lot to come back into his mind all at once. He sucks in a breath as he realizes Emma is still talking.
"—if you want to go?"
"Huh?" He really should be paying attention to what's happening around him rather than the past that seems to be cropping up everywhere lately.
Emma blushes. "I mean if you want, since you're a fan and all and I've got an extra ticket since my friend canceled."
That gives him enough context clues to piece together what's going on.
"Oh," he says slowly. "I couldn't, I mean I'm sure the tickets were hard to get and—"
Emma shrugs. "Don't worry about it, I have them anyway. So do you want to go?"
He hasn't seen Annabeth even remotely up close since that day in the school parking lot. Could he…
"Sure."
Emma smiles brightly, asking for his number to sort out the details but everything is sort of a blur from that point on because he has no idea what compelled him to say that.
This could be a horrible idea, it probably is a horrible idea for his sake.
But all that stands out amongst the noise of thought is that he's going to see Annabeth again.
-.-
This is most definitely a terrible idea. His mother is watching Noah (she'd agreed the moment he said he was going with Emma without even hearing the rest of the sentence) and had practically pushed him out of his own apartment.
He's nervous for no good reason when he pulls up to Emma's house. (He figured the least he could do is drive them since she's offering the ticket). It's not like they'll actually talk, she'll be on stage and he'll just watch her from the crowd.
Nevermind that it'll still be the closest he's been to her in a while.
Most people didn't have to see their ex in this way.
Emma chatters happily, which helps distract him from his thoughts.
"It's almost like a small teaser show 'cause she released her single for the new album," Emma explains.
He nods along, not able to say much else. The trees pass by in a dark blur of the night and Emma turns to him again.
"So how long have you lived here?"
"Pretty much my whole life," he answers. "What about you?" he asks, to be polite.
"Really? I moved here a year ago for the job after a breakup." He might imagine the pause after the word. "But I heard that Annabeth Chase also grew up around here."
Well, she'd moved in middle school but he hadn't met her until high school. But that seems like too much information to know so he just shrugs.
"Yeah, for a bit, mostly high school."
Emma throws him a curious look. "Yeah…wait, did you ever run into her back then?"
Run into her arms, her lips, her room…
He clears his throat. "Yeah…"
"Wait, really?"
He shrugs again. "She went to my high school." As a rule, he doesn't really tell people he knew Annabeth Chase because they always ask too many questions and it brings up too many memories. But since Emma did give him a ticket…
"No way! That's so cool! What was she like?" Emma asks the expected question.
He checks their surroundings as they pull closer to the venue. "Just like how she is on TV…looks like we're here."
His heart is hammering again by the time they find their seats somewhere in the middle front on the left side of the stage. It's a small venue, hence Emma's comment about a teaser show, which makes it feel even more personal.
"Excited?"
He just nods at her, though excited might not be the right word. He doesn't know what he's feeling.
After what feels like an eternity, the lights dim slightly, and he loses his hearing in the cacophony of screams as the music picks up.
A second later Annabeth Chase steps onto the stage with a soft smile and raises the mic. Her words flow smoothly, instantly calming him down.
He was sunshine, I was midnight rain
He wanted comfortable, I wanted that pain
She's just as mesmerizing as she's always been when she sings, as if she's gone to another place. She walks like a model down the length of the stage, first towards the right and then towards the left, towards him.
My boy was a montage
Slow motion
Love Potion
Jumping of things in the ocean
She's on his side now, and he forgets to breathe as she scans the crowd. The lights aren't as dim as they could be and no doubt she can see the faces of the people a row before him.
I broke his heart cause he was nice…..
He knows the exact moment she sees him. It should be impossible, he's not that well lit, she shouldn't be looking that closely at the faces anyway, so many things don't make sense about it all.
Yet she freezes, just stops singing.
The crowd keeps the chorus going, singing the first lyric as she stares at him for another second. Then she's lifting her hands up to clap along the crowd's singing, before bringing the mic closer and singing the rest.
Her recovery is swift and professional. In a way, it must have always been, she must have gotten over him quickly.
Annabeth doesn't look at him again until the very end of the song.
I guess sometimes we all get some type of haunted
Some type of haunted
And I never think of him
Except on midnights like this….
He swears she's looking at him as the last notes play and all the lights dim completely. He holds his breath for that dark moment, heart hammering at the thought that maybe she had meant—
And then the lights spring back on and she's smiling brightly at the crowd again. Whatever he thought he'd seen in her eyes is gone as she begins to talk.
"Hello everyone, I'm Annabeth!"
The rest of the show feels like a fever dream in the night. She's enchanting on stage, and every detail he thought he'd forgotten about her comes rushing back like a flood, leaving him gasping for air.
When the show ends, he just sits there.
"Wasn't that amazing?" Emma turns to him with a wide smile.
He feels bad that he'd almost forgotten she was there, and manages a nod.
"Let's wait for the crowd to thin out a bit more," he says, trying to buy some time to get his shit together. He needs to be able to drive and not cry.
They wait until half the people have left to stand up. Emma is chatting about something that he's doing his best to listen to, and just as they're about to exit, a security guard stops them.
"Percy Jackson?" The guy asks.
"Uh, yeah…" He's confused and a little terrified of this guy.
"Come with me."
Emma looks at him with concern.
"What's this about?" he asks, sharing the glance with her.
The security guard seems to notice they're together and turns to Emma. "You can come too."
Having no choice, they share another concerned glance before following the guard…towards the backstage area?
What?
The tiniest spark of…something, flickers in his chest as he follows the guard. It quickly becomes a fully raging fire inside his body as soon as they come to a stop backstage and his sight locks on Annabeth who's talking to someone holding a tablet.
He watches the guard, who gestured for them to stay in place, walk up to Annabeth, sees the exact moment he tells her and she whips her head up.
Almost automatically, her eyes find his and he's frozen under her gaze, unable to move, breathe…think.
She takes a few steps towards him.
"Percy?" Her voice comes out quietly, disbelief coloring his name. He can't believe it either.
"Annabeth."
All of sudden they're back in that parking lot, his blurry vision erasing her features from him as he wishes her luck.
Annabeth takes another step, she's so close now, and her hand starts to rise, as if she's going to touch him. But a movement in his periphery causes her to freeze, quickly pulling back her hand.
She's not looking at him anymore, and when he follows her gaze he realizes she's looking at Emma, who's been standing just behind him.
"Hi," Emma speaks up shyly, realizing the attention is on her now.
Percy memorized Annabeth a long time ago, a skill he'd thought he'd forgotten but he can read her now. And among the cacophony of emotions the one that stands out now is the tiniest smidge of disappointment.
It's the same way she used to be when he'd eat ice cream and not offer her some. She'd never say anything but he knew she wanted a bite.
"Hi," Annabeth responds, clearing her throat. He recognizes the moment she slips into that tough exterior. The one he'd spent forever breaking down and getting past. "And you are…"
"Emma," Emma introduces herself with a smile. "A big fan!"
Annabeth smiles. He can tell it's slightly forced, but no one else can. "Hi Emma, nice to meet you."
She turns back towards him and her grey eyes are so heavy it actually hurts him. Sadness colors them darker as she speaks.
"And nice to see you again, Percy."
His throat is dry and he knows that it's obvious he's trying to blink back tears.
"Yeah…" It comes out scratchy and horrible.
"And Emma, your…"
"Friend." He responds quickly, as if he's trying to reassure her. As if that's something he has to do. As if it matters.
(It doesn't)
Maybe it's just habit.
Annabeth nods slowly, something clearing up in her eyes at his words. Exactly like how they would when he finally did offer some of his ice cream. It really shouldn't matter that Emma is a friend.
(Then why does it feel like it does?)
Annabeth turns towards Emma. "Sorry to interrupt your night."
He forces himself to turn away from Annabeth to glance at Emma, only to see her look away from him.
"Not at all," she replies with a smile. "This is so cool, do you mind if I get a picture?"
"Of course!"
Now that's a real Annabeth smile. He watches them take a picture, sees how Annabeth smiles and talks and interacts with a fan, pen flying with an autograph. She's a natural, like she was truly made for this.
Just like how she seemed to own the stage earlier, with a crowd cheering her name. For some reason, it hits him then that she really has made it.
He's known this, but to see it with his own eyes...
She did it.
Just like he knew she would.
And she's never felt more far away than right now.
And maybe that's why, when she finally turns back towards him, the words that leave his mouth are, "you made it."
It shouldn't be a sad thing, but she almost hangs her head as she responds. "Just like you said."
"You…" she continues, trailing off and looking at his hands. Searching for a ring, he realizes, she's searching for his dream.
But he keeps his hands in his pockets because it's not about him. It's about her.
"I'm proud of you," he says instead.
A single tear escapes her eyes. "Percy—"
"My mom," he forges on, blinking back his own tears. "She is too, she listens to all your stuff."
More tears fall down her face and he has to look away otherwise he won't be able to stop himself.
"And Grover—"
"Percy," she cuts him off in a pleading voice. "Please."
When he looks up at her, her eyes are shining with tears. He stops talking, swallowing thickly.
"Annabeth! Let's go!" a voice calls loudly, making them both jump.
She nods, quickly wiping her face. Once again, her recovery is swift.
"I've got to go." She turns towards Emma, mustering a smile. "Thanks for coming, I hope you enjoyed and sorry for…all this."
She turns back towards him. "Percy…"
But nothing else comes out.
"Annabeth."
That's all they can say. And with one last glance and a nod, she turns around and walks off. A guy with curly hair immediately coming to her side. The security guard from earlier steps up and shepherds them off stage.
They're silent as they get in the car. He's still reeling from everything that just happened and god knows what Emma thinks. He finally finds his voice a few minutes later.
"Sorry," he starts, breaking the silence. "Sorry about everything that just happened and ending the night like this." Emma doesn't deserve to be in the middle of his emotional turmoil.
"I mean, I got to meet Annabeth Chase so…" She smiles, but a second later it's faded out. "But you…you guys have a history don't you?"
He sighs. No hiding it now. "Yeah."
She doesn't respond, and when he glances over she's nodding thoughtfully. "It's a shame," she says with a light laugh. "You're attractive."
"What?"
That feels like it came out of left field. She just looks at him, shaking her head, with a slight smile on her face. "A tale as old as time…"
"What is?"
"I wish you luck, Percy," she replies instead.
"What for?"
Emma doesn't respond.
-.-
"Why?"
She jumps at the sound of his voice. He holds up his hands to tell her he didn't mean any harm and plops down beside her.
"What?" she asks, leaning her head back against the couch. The lights feel very bright and her eyes heavy, she forces them open when he doesn't respond.
Leo is shooting her a look. Of course her producer/friend had to be at that concert. Had to see it all go down. She knows he won't let it go either.
"What are you doing here?" she pushes, as if she's not the one sitting on the studio floor at midnight.
In her defense, it had been blissfully empty before Leo arrived.
"Why'd you call him backstage?" he asks, ignoring her question.
Honestly, she doesn't know why. One glance at the crowd to find his face and she needed more, craved more. Like a moth drawn to the flame that will ultimately hurt it.
Because god, had it hurt to see him standing so close yet so far in front of her. All of sudden she'd been shivering, doing all she could to prevent herself from reaching out and falling into his warmth.
It wasn't hers to take anymore.
But his pull had been just as strong as before, it makes sense, everything revolves around the sun after all.
"Just go," Leo says, breaking her out of her thoughts.
"Huh?"
Leo shakes his head, his curls bouncing at the motion. "Just go to him again."
It's her turn to shoot him a look. "Are you crazy?"
He lets out a sigh, leaning his head back against the couch like she had a minute ago. "Are you?"
Before she can say anything he continues. "I mean, I saw you guys. It's clear you have a lot to talk about, and whatever this is…." he pauses to sit up and gesture at her sitting on the floor, "won't go away until you do."
"He doesn't want to see me again."
Leo rolls his eyes. "Right, that's why he cried as you walked away."
"I don't want to see him again," she lies, remaining stubborn.
Leo holds her hand gently as he looks into her eyes. "You need to."
-.-
She takes a deep breath, lingering at the small front stoop. Shifting the gift basket, she frees up a hand, hovering it over the doorbell. In an act of courage, she forces herself to press it.
It's all too familiar, the steps, the door, the sound of the doorbell as she waited for an after school snack.
Her heart is beating faster than it did before her concert, and a few seconds later the door opens to reveal Sally. She looks like she hasn't aged a day, which makes everything that much more familiar, and she stands with her mouth open in shock.
Annabeth offers a tentative smile. Maybe Percy had been lying about his mom being proud of her, she fights the urge to hide.
"Annabeth?"
"Hi Sally," she says quietly, pushing the gift basket forward. "This, um, is for you."
It's an assortment of some stuff that she had thought Sally would like, she'd spent about a half a day agonizing over it.
Sally takes the basket and sets it aside, turning instead to rest her hands on Annabeth's shoulders.
"Let me look at you, oh!" And then she's in Sally's embrace, melting in the comfort it's always provided her. Tears well up in her eyes of their own accord.
"I missed you," she says quietly, speaking her truth.
Sally pulls away, a soft smile on her face. "And I've missed you, Annabeth, now come inside."
"I couldn—"
She doesn't have a choice, Sally pulls her in. "I can't believe you're actually here," she says as she does so. "I always wondered if you remembered me, and you're doing so many amazing things now and—"
"I could never forget you Sally." The woman had been like a mother to her. Percy and Sally were the only two people to believe in her from the get go. Even her dad hadn't fully come around until later.
Sally smiles at her with shining eyes. "You know we're so proud of you. I always said—"
"Daddy?"
A voice interrupts them and she turns to see a little boy about four years old standing in the doorway. His head is bowed down as he rubs his eyes, revealing his messy black hair.
Sally quickly sweeps forward and lifts him up.
"Noah," she says gently. "You're supposed to be in bed."
"I want daddy!" The boy, Noah, cries, finally looking up.
She freezes.
Shiny green eyes stare back at her.
The thought that had been forming in the back of her mind as soon as she saw the kid is now confirmed. Noah looks just like his dad and it tugs on her heart in a way she didn't know was possible.
"Who are you?" he says, staring at her with wide eyes.
"Hi," she tries to keep her voice stable. "I'm Annabeth."
Seems like Percy's dream had come true after all. When she'd seen Emma she had thought it had, it's embarrassing the relief she'd felt when he had called her his friend. But it's clear now that he'd gotten what he'd always wanted.
"You're not daddy!" Noah cries, breaking her out of her thoughts. "I want daddy!"
Sally begins to soothe him before the tears start to fall. "It's okay honey, he'll be here soon okay."
"Now!"
It's clear he's on the verge of a temper tantrum, so she quickly steps in.
"I know your dad," she says.
Noah stops for a second to look at her. "You do?"
"Oh yeah," she says as casually as she can. "I've known your dad for years!"
Wide green eyes fasten on her and it's almost painful. "Where is daddy?"
"Well, he's on his way."
It's clearly not the answer he wanted because his face begins to scrunch up. "But," she says quickly before he starts, "we can go look out for him."
Noah freezes. "Really?"
She glances at Sally who nods her permission. "Yeah, really," she replies. "Come on, let's go."
Sally puts Noah down and Annabeth tentatively reaches out her hand for him to grab. When his tiny fingers curl around hers, she swears a part of her melts. They walk slowly to the front door and end up on the front stoop.
"He'll come from there," she says pointing to the sidewalk. "Let's look out, okay?"
Noah nods. "Okay."
Sally rests a hand on her shoulder. "Sorry about this, Annabeth."
She shakes her head. The least she can do for Percy is help take care of his kid for a few minutes. "It's no problem at all, Sally."
"Are you sure?"
Noah's fingers are tightly curled around hers and she doesn't think she could leave even if she wanted.
"Well, then let me get some snacks. Does that sound good?" Sally aims the questions at Noah. "Will you stay with Annabeth?"
Noah nods his head aggressively, still looking at the sidewalk.
And when Sally turns to leave, it's just the two of them standing on the little front stoop.
"When is he coming?" Noah asks the dreaded question.
She has no idea where Percy is, or when he is actually getting back, or what he's even doing.
"Well, I'm not sure, that's why we're looking out," she says quickly. "So we'll know when."
"Okay…" Noah doesn't sound convinced.
She needs to keep talking before he realizes this is just waiting outside instead of inside.
"He probably went out to get something for you," she says, hoping that Percy has something he can hand Noah when he gets back. Or maybe Noah will forget by then anyway because his dedication to his father is absolutely adorable.
"Or," she says, trying to keep talking. "For your mom."
Percy could, and likely is, out with his wife anyway so it doesn't really make sense but it's something to distract Noa—
"I don't have a mom."
Her entire world freezes at the words that come out of Noah's mouth.
What?
But…how…Percy was supposed to get his happily ever after… That's why she left.
"Oh, I, uh," she stutters, trying to get her head together for Noah's sake. "Well, um, I used to look out for your dad all the time when I was young, right here on this stoop."
"Really?"
She nods, forcing herself to continue. It isn't a lie though, one time she came over to his house only to find he'd gone out with Grover and she'd waited on the steps till he came back to yell at him for ditching her.
"Yep," she says. "I stood here and looked out and he came right from there." She points to the sidewalks on their left.
Noah turns towards that direction. "Is he coming from there?"
"Probably," she answers.
Noah frowns, shifting a little, clearly tired from standing.
"We can wait inside if you're tired."
"No!"
"Okay okay," she soothes. "Want me to lift you up then?"
"I'm not tired!"
She can't help but smile at his stubbornness. She doesn't know who his mother is but Noah seems to have gotten all of his traits from his father. Or maybe because Percy was the one raising him.
Another pang to her heart.
"How about I lift you up just so you can see better?" she suggests.
His tiny face scrunches up in concentration as if he's considering the deal.
"Okay," he finally relents.
She picks him up and he looks out towards the street.
"That better?" she asks. "You can see more now."
"Yeah," he says, letting out a small yawn. The tiredness is clearly catching up to him. He starts to nod off on her shoulder, but then jerks himself up. It's adorable.
"Why don't you lay your head down," she suggests. "I'll turn so you can still see."
It doesn't take much convincing. Within a few seconds, he's resting his head on her shoulder and she's turned mostly towards the front door so he can "see" the sidewalk. It's clear he's falling asleep.
"I'll let you know when he comes, so you can sleep if you want," she continues to talk softly, rocking him a little. His tiny hands grip the back of her shirt and he's a warm weight against her now.
"Your dad will be back soon," she continues softly, still rocking him. "He has a knack for showing up when you need him."
"You know," she says, the memory flooding back into her mind. "One time I had to sing at a talent show for school and I was really nervous. I thought I might not do it."
Noah's snoring softly now but now that the words have started she has to keep going.
"And just when I thought 'I'm leaving' he shows up. He'd run all the way to the backstage area just to see me. There was a teacher yelling at him 'cause he wasn't allowed to be there but he just stood there and told me that he knows I can do it."
Percy's hands in hers, his imploring eyes. That talent show had been the most pivotal point for her, it's when she thought for the first time that maybe she can do this.
"I think," she continues. "That's when I really fell in love with him."
-.-
Time stops when he hears her words.
Nothing could have prepared him for the sight in front of him, anyway. Annabeth Chase.
And in her arms, Noah, his son, sleeping softly on her shoulder as she speaks softly and rocks him.
But then he hears her words and almost drops the grocery bags. He remembers that day like it was yesterday.
It had been the day he'd seen her on stage and realized she would never be his.
Annabeth turns around slowly, freezing when she sees him.
He has too much to say, too many thoughts, but Noah's sleeping and he's forgotten how to use his voice. Thankfully, Annabeth nods her head towards the door, calming him as usual and forcing him to spring into action.
He opens the door for her, following as she walks in with a sleeping Noah in her arms.
Sally glances up from the kitchen as they enter and he quickly puts a finger to his lips. He watches his mom take in the scene, Percy with groceries and Annabeth with Noah, and realizes just how painfully domestic it all feels.
He sets down the bags and gestures to Annabeth to follow him. They walk down the hall to his old childhood bedroom, which has become Noah's in a way, and arranges the blanket so Annabeth can set him down on the bed.
But when he turns to look at her, she's scanning the room, drinking in everything around her and it hits him that Annabeth Chase is in his room. Countless memories of the kisses and nights spent here pop up in his head and for a second he's lost in that time.
Her eyes finally land on the bed and the blankets he's arranged and moves to set Noah down. Noah stirs a little as she lays him down and she quickly starts speaking.
"Shhh, it's okay, your dad's here now."
Noah settles down in an instant, which shocks him because it normally takes him forever to get Noah in bed.
Annabeth starts to move away only to realize that Noah is still gripping onto her shirt.
His son, at age four, is already braver than he ever was. He held on, while Percy let go.
Quickly detaching herself from his hold, Annabeth moves back looking at Noah with something he can't decipher in her eyes.
They quietly exit the room.
"He fell asleep so quickly!" is the first thing his mom says when they re-enter the living room.
"I think he was tired from standing," Annabeth replies.
His mom shakes her head. "No, you don't know how difficult it is to get him to sleep Annabeth. You managed in ten minutes."
Annabeth actually blushes, ducking her head down shyly. "I'm glad I could help."
Like father, like son, he wants to say. Of course only Annabeth could have that soothing of an effect on them.
"Come here Annabeth, I put together a few snacks—"
"Sally, this is a whole café!"
His mother smiles. "Only the best for the best."
He watches her sit down at the breakfast bar and pick up a mini sandwich off a plate. He leans against the wall and watches her take a bite.
"These are delicious!" she says, with her mouth full, just like she used to. Good to know turning into a celebrity hadn't changed that.
And he can't stop his smile either. It's reminiscent and familiar. The image of Annabeth with Noah flashes through his mind, making his heart ache even more.
He tunes back into the conversation just as his mom is leaving, but not before shooting a very pointed and obvious look at him.
But this is something he doesn't need her to tell him to do. He's already got too many words running through his head, and in Annanth's presence, they're at risk of spilling out.
"Thanks for helping with Noah," he says, breaking the momentary silence and walking into the kitchen.
She nods. "It's no big deal."
But it is. It's his son, and his….well, what is Annabeth to him now? Other than the woman who makes his heart ache when she holds his child, or smiles or does anything else for that matter.
"What are you doing here, Annabeth?"
She jerks back as if he'd hit her and he realizes too late that the words came out the wrong way. Annabeth quickly stands up and begins to move towards the door, words rapidly tumbling from her lips.
"I just wanted to drop off a gift basket for Sally since you said she liked my music, but I'll head out now, tell her I said thanks for the food."
"Annabeth, wait—"
"It was good, and um, your son is really cute and—" She's pretty much at the door now, he doesn't have a choice. He can't let her get away again. Not now. Not when she's so close.
"Annabeth."
Almost instinctively, much like his son, he grabs her arm to stop her.
"Annabeth," he continues, as she freezes in place. "I didn't mean it like that."
He loosens his grip but realizes she isn't trying to break free of it, actually she doesn't move at all.
"Then what did you mean?" she asks quietly, instead.
"I…" God how can he even explain this? "I…was just surprised to see you here, and then last week at the concert, I…you're just everywhere now and—"
It's too much, too overwhelming, too hot, too—
"And what?" she asks, in the same quiet voice.
"And it's killing me slowly," he answers.
Her surprised eyes meet his and the cloudy grey cools him down, his thoughts flowing out of him in a way he can't stop now.
"Because I just came back and saw the girl I fell in love with rocking my son to sleep and it's like a piece I didn't know I needed. And it hurts because it's something I can't have."
"Annabeth…" He looks at her pleadingly, for what he doesn't know. "You've always been someone I can't have and…"
His voice falters, he looks down at the floor drained. "Your song is wrong, I think about you way more than I should."
-.-
Once again he's left her speechless from his ability to just bare his heart so honestly and openly. It's something she's never been able to do quite right. It's why it all ended up in her songs instead.
"Percy," she breathes, trying to blink back tears. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you, and I'm sorry I'm hurting you now."
"I'm too selfish, I don't know why you ever saw anything in me," she continues, unable to look at him. "I couldn't help myself. You asked why I'm here? It's because I can't stop thinking about you. Ever since the song, ever since I saw you in the crowd and backstage, I…"
God, she sounds so stupid.
"I can't help but want to see you. It's always been like that and apparently, it hasn't changed."
Her gaze moves front the floor to where his hand is still gripping hers. That one point of contact feels like her lifeline.
Percy must notice her looking because he quickly lets go, starts to move his hand away.
She grabs it before he can.
"Please," she whispers, asking for way more than she deserves. His eyes meet hers and she's warm in a way she hasn't been since seven years ago.
And then his arms are around her and she's gripping his shirt and her whole body is on fire and it's like there's a light shining in the middle of the night.
"I wrote that song," she says after a bit, breaking the silence. "To get over you."
He pulls back and she meets his eyes, deciding to speak her truth. "It had the opposite effect."
Percy just stares at her for a second, before letting out a small sigh. "So where does this leave us then?"
She nods towards the couch.
"About seven years of catching up?"
There are still so many questions, so many gaps, so many blank spaces to fill. But she knows that this is where they end. No more dust or rust or long stretches of silence between them anymore.
"And then?" he asks.
She looks at the lips she used to call home and smiles.
-.-
"Can I ask you a question?" he hears Annabeth say to Noah. He's still wrapping up work because Annabeth had come earlier than expected.
Which is rare because of her busy schedule nowadays with her tour wrapping up. But she'd showed up at their door with a smile, an action figure for Noah and a kiss for him.
"You just did," Noah says with a proud smile, making him chuckle.
Annabeth shakes her head. "You're too smart for a six year old, you know."
"That's what my dad says," Noah replies. He's still smiling from the hug he'd gotten from her when he'd shown her his report card.
"It's 'cause you keep helping him study," Percy says from his spot on the desk. "It's your fault, Annabeth."
"Shh!" She shushes him and turns back to Noah. "So can I ask you one or not?" she asks with a grin.
"Sure."
And then she leans closer to his ear and whispers something. He should be writing an email, but at this point he's too invested in the conversation and the way his son's eyes widen just further peaks his curiosity.
"Well?" Annabeth asks quietly, clearly waiting on Noah to answer. There's something slightly off about her stance but he can't quite put his finger on it.
Noah turns to whisper something in her ear.
She breaks out into a smile at whatever he says. "Only if you want," she replies softly. "And if your dad is okay with it."
Wait, what should he be okay with?
Noah leans back to whisper in her ear some more.
Her eyes are shining when she leans back to give him a hug. "Thank you," she responds softly.
"What's going on?" he cuts in, completely abandoning his email. He gets up from his desk to walk towards his girlfriend and son. "I feel left out."
Annabeth turns towards him. "Can I ask you a question?"
He smiles. "Do we get a personal concert for Annabeth Chase's hit song Question?"
She frowns at him adorably as Noah giggles. He relents. "Okay, yes."
"Did you ever have someone propose to you?"
And then she's down on one knee with a box in hand.
Over the years Annabeth Chase has done some incredible things, released music, won awards, managed to make their anniversary despite being on tour. But never had he ever thought he'd get this.
"Annabeth…" His voice comes out thick with emotion.
"Then what did you do?" She sings softly, still looking up at him.
"I said yes." And then he grabs her hands, tugs her up and pulls her into a hug. Her touch cools down his overheating heart and it's a type of bliss he didn't know he could have.
It's cliche, but he can't help but lift her up and spin her around. She laughs and it's beautiful.
"You're insane," he tells her as she slides the ring onto his finger. It's insane, actually, that she's here, that she's his.
She just smiles back and he bends down to catch her lips with his.
And that's when Noah decides to butt in.
"Ewww, dad, mom, stop it!"
-.-
She was midnight rain
A/N: A month ago I wrote in my journal that I needed Taylor Swift to release a new album and later that night she announced Midnights. It's been everything I needed because it sparked that passion in me to write again and I ended up with this 10k fic. I can't tell you how good it felt to just write something for the thrill and want of writing it.
If you caught the other references to other Midnights songs (and a few from her other albums as well) then kudos because there are a lot sprinkled here and there lol
I hope you guys liked this, and I would love to hear your thoughts, so please review!
And as always, thanks for reading!
See ya!