A/N: Me? Forget that I had to post here as well as ao3? Psssh, no, never!
(im so sorry i literally use this site once in a blue moon)
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Kushina is going in a week. There's so much Shiori has to do, but it suddenly all feels secondary because Kushina is leaving and Shiori is going to be alone.
Kushina is leaving, and Uzushio is running out of time, and Shiori is just herself.
She's not the hero with unstoppable determination and willpower.
She's not the methodical planner who has 12 Easy Steps to Kick Kaguya's Ass.
She's a two year old with legs that don't work right and clinical depression.
(She's a twenty-five year old shut-in who lived for her cat and occasional discord calls with her siblings that lived a continent away. She's the one who dropped out of college a semester in after having three consecutive mental breakdowns. She's the big sister who kept everyone together to ignore the fact that she was falling apart until it got too obvious and she fucking collapsed in on herself.)
Shiori has never, and will never, be enough. Kushina lets her forget that, but Kushina is leaving and Shiori is abruptly faced with her inadequacy. She's tired, and she's scared, and she's losing her crutch.
Her time is running out.
(Everyone's time is running out.)
-:-
Despite what fanfiction would leave one to believe, there is a grand total of fuck all a small child can do to effect the political machinations of a feudal society. Shiori has significantly less credit than even the average small child, as most people still think she's a little "special" and even the ones that don't are severely concerned about her codependency on Kushina.
(They're right to be concerned, but fuck them anyways. Kushina is awesome.)
Bottom line? Shiori doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell to keep Kushina with her. She's not even sure she'd want to, because all that would guarantee is Kushina also being in Uzushio at the time of the massacre. Shiori sure as shit isn't going to risk that.
Similarly, Shiori has even less of a chance of going to Konoha. They, for one, wouldn't need a crippled toddler, even if it was an Uzumaki. For two, her parents have become endearingly and annoyingly overprotective, in that it would be endearing if it wasn't fucking up any possible plans Shiori has.
There is, however, one tool Shiori has in her arsenal: she is absolutely adorable. Like, sickeningly cute. Downright cherubic. Kushina stopped taking her into town because they'd get waylaid by grannies trying to pinch her cheeks. At the time, it seemed terrible, but now?
Might as well use it to her advantage.
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Shiori doesn't like lying. It's not some moral quandary or anything, it just takes a lot of time and energy to lie effectively, and Shiori simply cannot be assed. Easier to tell the truth and not give a shit about the repercussions than to lie, and then eventually get caught in that lie four months down the road, and then have those repercussions plus four months extra.
It's just easier, in Shiori's opinion. Shiori likes things easy.
That said, what Shiori wants is to spend time with Kushinai, learn everything there is to know about sealing, not fucking die and chance another bullshit reincarnation, and save the nosy clan of loud ass redheads she's been born into. Yes, in that exact order.
Which is why Shiori sits next to her uncle at Kushina's going away party and prepares herself for some real Oscar worthy bullshit.
"Uncle Arashi?" she asks, all sad puppy dog eyes. Her uncle, for his part, looks utterly shocked that she's even there, which, yeah. Shiori has barely started talking to her parents, and she hasn't been subtle in avoiding the man. Can you blame her, though? He is a literal military dictator. Those typically aren't known for being outstanding paragons of morality.
"Shiori? You okay, kiddo?" He's still gaping at her like a landed fish, something close to amazement in his eyes. Shiori's starting to feel a little guilty.
"You're in charge, right?"
He nods.
"So, you can tell those other guys to let Kushina stay?" she asks, trying to make her voice sound hopeful. His eyes, a dark blue he shares with Kushina, go soft and sad. Hook.
"Oh, kiddo…"
"What if," Shiori says, letting some of the overwhelming Everything that is her life make her voice wet and wobbly, "What if she goes away, an' something bad happens?"
"Don't worry, kiddo," Arashi says, putting a hand on her head. "Konoha is our friend, and they'll make sure nothing bad happens to her."
Shiori looks into his eyes, grey against blue, and she says, "But isn't Grandpa from Konoha?"
And she watches the way he cringes, ever so slightly. Line.
"Well, uh, you gotta understand-"
Shiori looks down at her tiny, ink-stained hands.
"Grandpa likes Kushina, but he doesn't like me. Who's gonna protect me if Kushina goes away? She's been teaching me seals an' stuff, but I'm not good yet. What's gonna happen when she goes away?"
Shiori sees the vicious battle of emotions play out across her uncle's face in real time, before landing on something stormy and resolute. It's an echo of Kushina's determination, and despite her misgivings about the man, the expression makes her feel safer.
"Listen up, kiddo. I'm in charge, you said it yourself. It's my job as Uzukage to make sure everybody in Uzushio feels safe. Especially my family. You're not going to feel safe when Kushina leaves, right?"
Shiori agrees, sniffling piteously. Arashi's expression pinches, but he nods.
"I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you feel safe, okay kiddo? I can't keep Kushina here, but anything else, and I'll do it. I promise."
Shiori smiles at her Uncle Arashi, and gives him a hug. Sinker.
-:-
Kushina has been sleeping over every night this week. Auntie Hinami, too, but Kushina has set up shop in Shiori's room. Every night, Kushina sets Shiori on the spare futon, and then curls around her like a protective cocoon of red hair and sea breeze and warmth.
It feels like safety and love, and there is a terrible dread in Shiori's chest as they fall asleep each night because she knows it's all temporary.
She knows that these could very well be the last memories she makes with her cousin, and she doesn't want them all to be tinged by this despair that crawls through her lungs, but Shiori can't help it. It settles in her airways and crushes tiny sobs out of her as Kushina wipes away her tears and tells her the sweetest lies.
Everything's gonna be okay. I'll be back before you know it. You don't have to be scared.
(Shiori lays in bed with her big sister, and lets herself be comforted.
For now, at least, Shiori can keep this. For now, at least, Shiori is safe.)
-:-
There's no storm the day Kushina leaves. No downpour, symbolic of the deep sorrow felt by all. There's not so much as a cloud in the sky. No, it's warm, and sunny, and criminally humid the day Kushina gets on a boat for the Land of Fire.
Kushina is crying, and Aunt Hinami is crying, and everyone is crying, but there is wet laughter as Uzushio sends one of its princesses to the leaf. This, to them, is not a goodbye. It is an overture of friendship, a see you later, a promise to reunite again.
Shiori has dry eyes as she watches Kushina leave. She takes in the curve of her cheeks, the slant of her eyes, the shape of her grin. She memorizes the way the sun sits in Kushina's hair, the way it glints off her eyes to make them brighter, the way it's trapped in her teeth as she smiles.
("I'll see you later, okay? When you get bigger, you can come visit, and I'll show you everything in Konoha, dattebane. I promise, Mochi."
Shiori looks at this girl she's decided to live for, with sunlight in her soul, and despairs with dry eyes because she cannot afford to forget a single detail.
"Goodbye, Kushina-nee. I love you," Shiori says, because she can't bring herself to agree. Shiori doesn't like lying, afterall.)
Kushina leaves, crying and laughing and waving until the boat gets too small to see out on the bright horizon.
Kushina is gone, and there is not a cloud in the sky as the Shiori's sun disappears.
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I really am so sorry guys, I just completely forgot I was cross-posting here. That said, if you want to get the chapters first, go to ao3. I use that site way more often nowadays.