It's a restless night for Lin.

A/N: I'm back from vacation! Disney, Universal, and the down time in between in Florida was very much needed.

This week has been exhausting to say the least. I ended up catching a cold (thankfully not covid though!), tired from my trip, and I was back to work less than 12 hours after returning home.

So I hope you enjoy this slightly shorter chapter lol

**Also warning I wrote most of this in a cold fog with a heavy sprinkle of sleepiness, so if you see any mistakes let me know :)

A Winter breeze rattled the window of Lin's room, as the moon cast a white glow through the curtains. The earthbender herself was laid on the bed, blankets in a disarray as she wore a frown on her face as in her sleep memories cast her into the past.

Lin was struggling to finish making dinner. A look at the clock told her that Tulok would be home any minute and she had at least 10 more minutes needed on the meat. She bit her lip as dread filled her stomach and she felt even more the need to throw up than she had already been feeling that day. He always expressed his displeasure any time dinner was late, and when she wasn't at the door to greet him.

Her hands shook as she started plating everything else, mentally scolding herself for accidentally falling asleep that afternoon. In her defence she had been feeling ill the last few days, but she doubted he would care for her excuse.

She heard a crunch of snow outside their door and quickly set down what she was doing and dashed to the door. She had just managed to pull his moccasins out when he unlocked the door and stepped inside.

"Hello, wife." Was all he said, as he turned.

Lin helped him with his jacket, before turning and hanging it up.

"I said hello." He said as he turned around and grabbed her chin, forcing her to look into his eyes.

Lin swallowed. "H-hello, Tulok. I hope you had a good work day." She responded, with little emotion in her voice.

He grunted and practically shoved her back before he shucked off his boots. He put on his moccasins and then headed into the house while Lin picked up his boots.

She smoothed down her apron with her shaky hands after she stood and then went back towards the kitchen. She found him standing there with an annoyed expression on his face.

"Why is dinner not finished? Spirits woman, all I ask is that you keep the home tidy and have dinner ready on time. Is that too much to ask?" He growled.

"No Tulok. I'm sorry. I have been feeling sick the last few days. I apologize for losing track of time." She ducked her head, preparing herself for the fist that was sure to follow.

But instead he moved closer and lifted her chin. She hesitated a moment before raising her eyes to meet his. His bright blue eyes were narrowed in curiosity as he studied her. "Tell me what you are feeling."

"Nausea, exhaustion, and my body aches. I-I think it may be a minor flu." She said quietly, gone was her fight that she still had even just a few months ago.

"Hmmm." He studied her a little longer. "I will be taking you to a healer tomorrow. My morning is free from meetings." He let go of her chin again, but didn't shove her back this time. "Finish dinner."

He moved to head to their room when Lin stopped him. "I... I'm fine. Just a little stomach bug, I don't want to waste your time going to the healers for something so trivial."

His eyes flashed. "Are you questioning me?"

Lin swallowed, and bowed her head. "N-no, Tulok."

"That's what I thought. And while it may be just a flu, there is also a very good chance that you are finally with child." He then turned and continued out of the room.

Lin stood there in shock as his words sunk in. Dread filled her as she realized that her body was truly no longer hers. She placed a hand over her lower abdomen, feeling her flat stomach beneath the thick dress and the apron covering it. Ice filled her veins at the thought of bringing his child into the world, and that made her feel even more nauseous. She ended up slapping a hand over her mouth and dashing to the washroom, retching despite her empty stomach.

Resentment filled her as she continued gagging into the basin. She hated the thought of being pregnant as she was unsure if she could ever love his child.

…

"Make her stop crying! I have work in the morning." Tulok said from the doorway. He was dressed in his nightclothes, with a scowl on his face.

"I'm trying! She just won't stop, I don't know what's wrong!" Lin cried out, her voice raised in panic and concern as she held Nuna to her shoulder and lightly bounced her, tears in her own eyes at the crying. She had been up with the month old infant for most of the night, trying and failing to calm the usually calm child.

The room went silent when Tulok surged forward and yanked Lin by her braid. It was enough movement to startle the infant into silence for a moment. "Don't you raise your voice at me." He growled.

"I'm sorry, please… don't hurt her." Lin begged, her voice much softer.

Tulok let out a sigh, releasing Lin gently before running a hand over his face. "I'm not going to hurt her. I just wanted you to get her to stop crying!"

His voice raised by the end and it seemed Nuna was reminded that she was upset, as her little face scrunched up once more.

"Shh little one, please don't cry." Lin urged softly, a warmth in her voice that was not there when talking with Tulok. She swayed softly, trying to lull the baby to sleep. "Mama's got you, it's alright."

Nuna still proceeded to cry loudly into Lin's ear.

"Can't you do something?"

"I've tried everything, she has been fed, changed, and burped. She isn't running a fever, and her tummy is soft, so she isn't gassy. I-I don't know what else to do." Lin cried, scared tears falling from her eyes.

"Give her to me." He demanded.

Lin only allowed herself a brief moment of hesitancy before gently handing the wailing babe to her father. If anything, Nuna began screaming louder when she realized she wasn't in her mother's arms anymore. Lin bit her lip as she watched him be very gentle with their newborn daughter, as he tried himself to get her to quiet down. The little girl apparently liked her father's attempts even less than her mother's.

"Here, take her." He said, depositing the almost 9lb baby into her arms.

Lin hugged her daughter close, brushing a kiss on the tuft of hair on her head. Her cries only quieted a little, only calming slightly at being back in her mama's arms.

"Well? Do we just let her cry till she stops? How am I supposed to go to work with no sleep?"

Lin began patting Nuna's bottom as she swayed, hoping the gentle rhythm would help, even if it hadn't an hour before. "I… I have a suggestion, but I don't think you will like it."

He crossed his arms across his chest. "Oh just spit it out already."

Lin swallowed and focused her gaze fully on her baby. "My Mom used to say that I had moments like this… but then she would give me a pebble to hold or a metal spoon and I calmed down… maybe… maybe she is an earthbender and she feels the missing earth here?" Lin posed the thought. She had wondered it earlier, but had no way to access anything that would confirm her theory.

"Out of the question. I am not giving you ammunition to use against me." He hissed, standing to his full height. "Find a different way to calm her. I am going to try and get some fucking sleep." He stormed out of the nursery and into their room, slamming the door behind him, which caused Nuna to let out another louder cry in her startlement.

The newborn cry shifted into a strangled cry of "Mama!"

Suddenly in front of her was a floating present aged Nuna, choking on air as her limbs were crooked awkwardly. A wicked laugh came from behind Lin, and she suddenly felt cold, heavy arms around her.

"I told you not to disobey. Look at what you have done. This is your doing l, wife. Our little girl is suffering from your foolish, selfish acts. Freedom comes at a cost, are you willing to trade your children for it?"

Lin let out a heartbreaking cry as Nuna faded from in front of her. Suddenly she was falling. All around her was pitch black, but she could hear cries of all four of her children. Her arms felt like lead and she couldn't reach them through the surrounding darkness.

"It's your fault. Look at what you've done." His voice said tauntingly.

Lin awakened with a gasp. She tried to catch her breath, realizing it was just a dream. She focused her eyes to her youngest two children, hoping she hadn't woken them, to find the bed empty. A sob tore from her lips as the memories of her nightmare swirled around her and blurred into her reality.

"'in…Lin!" She was pulled out of her mind by a warm hand gently rubbing her back.

"Hey, you're okay, it's just me, Kya. You had a nightmare." Kya caught Lin's panicked eyes with hers. "Let's breathe together, in - one, two, three, four…"

Once Lin's breathing calmed, Kya gently wiped the tears from the younger woman's face.

"Where…?"

Kya instantly knew what Lin was asking. "Tayen and Tarlo are cuddled up asleep on my bed. I tucked them in after they came to me."

Lin instantly felt both relieved that they were safe and an overwhelming amount of guilt. She hated that she scared her children, thinking that they must have been terrified. "Are-are they okay?" She asked, her voice a little raspy from emotion and sleep. A pained expression twisted her face.

Kya nodded and gave Lin a reassuring smile. "They are okay, I promise. You may get some extra hugs tomorrow though." She said, adding a wink.

The earthbender let herself relax a little at the brunette's reassurance. Her breathing calmed more as she focused on the soothing caress of Kya's hand on her back.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kya asked after a few moments.

Lin shook her head, then turned it towards her pillow.

"That's okay sweetie. We don't have to talk right now." Kya assured. "Is there anything I can do for you right now?"

It was silent for a moment, before a quiet, "hold me," sounded in the dark room.

Kya stood and walked around the bed, before taking the place where the children had been not long ago. Soon, she was helping Lin settle against her, her own arms wrapped around the emotionally drained woman.

"I've got you, Linny." Kya whispered into the ebony hair as she pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I've got you."