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She could see Jason in the darkness, holding out his hand to her. Offering
her the world, everything that she ever wanted. No strings attached, no
hidden agenda, just a trip to Italy. A voyage to Italy and towards
freedom.
"I don't want to be free . . . I want to be with Lucky." She said, her words catching in her throat.
She knew this scene all too well. It was the last time she had seen Jason. He took off after that and had never come back. But now he was coming back. He was coming . . .
All the sudden she was in the middle of the bridge alone. She wore the leather jacket that Jason gave her, over the wedding dress that Chloe had designed for her wedding to Lucky. Her hair was longer, down a little past her shoulders, it hung loose in curly tendrils and a soft breeze was blowing.
In the distance she heard the sound of his motorcycle. She did not seem startled by his approach, as if she knew he was coming. She looked down at the ring on her finger, the one that Lucky had given her replacing the one that Helena had forced him to give her.
It was a simple gold band with a small ruby stone. The band had an inscription, "You have my heart and that is a permanent lock."
The motorcycle reached the bridge and stopped short. She turned and saw his eyes first. The beautiful crystal blue eyes that had stolen her heart so many years ago.
She did not even look down as she tore the ring from her finger. She threw it into the icy water far below the bridge. Her eyes stayed with his, anticipation slowly getting the better of the two of them.
She could hear the ring hit the icy water. The splash tore her eyes away from his. She looked down at the water and suddenly faced the other end of the bridge. Lucky was there staring at her.
In the middle of the bridge she saw both men at either side.
"I'm sorry." She whispered to Lucky before she ran into Jason's open arms. He twirled her around and lifted her up towards him. Their lips met for a soft passionate kiss before he put her on his motorcycle. He climbed on in front of her, she took hold of his waist, and then they drove off towards the sunrise. She did not look back towards Lucky.
She felt safe. She felt complete. And she felt free.
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She woke up in a cold sweat. She looked next to her and was disappointed to see who was sprawled out beside her.
'Why didn't I take his hand? Why didn't I run into his arms and never let go? Why did I put my dreams on hold and sacrifice everything for this 'Lucky'. The Lucky beside me is a stranger. He is not the man that I fell in love with as a naïve sixteen-year-old girl. I grew during the fire and after the brainwashing I told myself that everything could go back to how it was before. I knew it was a lie and I just kept on believing. Lucky was safe, familiar territory. Jason was dangerous, new territory.'
She slowly climbed out of bed. She went into another room and grabbed a simple sundress from the laundry room. She knew the dress was too warm for the late night weather but it was the last thing on her mind. She had to get away.
She walked to her studio. She knew that she had nothing to be afraid of, but in the back of her mind she could hear his voice telling her she should not walk alone at night. He had always worried about her. He had always been there when she needed him. But would he still be there? Would he still care about her? Would she allow herself to care about him again?
The building was dark but she took no notice. When she opened the door she was surprised by how much dust had settled and how the smell of stale paint lingered in the air. It had been years since she had been there. But she felt something when she walked in, she felt him. Every time she had gone to her studio after she had nursed Jason back to health she felt him there. That is why after a year of marriage she had stopped coming there. Every inch reminded her of Jason. Reminded her of the path she had not taken.
She ignored the dust and went to the closet. She opened it and reached down towards the back corner of the closet. Her hands quickly found what she was looking for. She pulled it out and looked at it in the darkness. Her eyes adjusted and she saw the faded colors on the canvas. And for a moment she felt him there with her. Seeing the painting was as comforting as his arms around her.
'Oh Jason. I should have gone with you. I should have told you how I felt. I should have realized that all I would find with Lucky was unhappiness. You made me feel again, Jason. Nothing means more to me than what we shared. Nothing, even Lucky, can ever compare. I need you, Jason. I denied it so long. I tried to forget you. I tried to move on. But my heart refuses to let me forget. I loved you Jason. I still love you.'
Tears she didn't know were falling came down. She only realized when she noticed the wet droplets on the canvas she held in front of her.
But all the sudden a sense of ease washed over her. She could sense him. She could smell him.
'He is here.'
She turned around and saw him in the doorway.
'This must be a dream.'
She closed her eyes and then opened them again. He was still there. She had to pinch herself before she knew it was real. It was real, he was there, he was really there.
'He's here. It's not a dream.'
She dropped the canvas. He walked slowly closer. He paused just a few inches from her.
"Jason." She said, barely above a whisper.
The tears came again. He took his hands and wiped the tears coming down and they refused to stop. It was just like before, the feeling she got inside when she saw him. It was like he never left and that time stood still.
"Why are you crying?" He asked, his voice low.
"Because you are here." She said, her tears still flowing.
He took her in his arms and pulled her close. Her head rested against his leather jacket. It smelled just like it had so many years ago. She could feel her tears wetting his leather jacket and she tried to pull away but he held her closer, reassuring her.
"Shhh. . ." He said, softly, as he caressed her back with his hands.
'This feels so right. I feel so right. I feel free.'
"I don't want to be free . . . I want to be with Lucky." She said, her words catching in her throat.
She knew this scene all too well. It was the last time she had seen Jason. He took off after that and had never come back. But now he was coming back. He was coming . . .
All the sudden she was in the middle of the bridge alone. She wore the leather jacket that Jason gave her, over the wedding dress that Chloe had designed for her wedding to Lucky. Her hair was longer, down a little past her shoulders, it hung loose in curly tendrils and a soft breeze was blowing.
In the distance she heard the sound of his motorcycle. She did not seem startled by his approach, as if she knew he was coming. She looked down at the ring on her finger, the one that Lucky had given her replacing the one that Helena had forced him to give her.
It was a simple gold band with a small ruby stone. The band had an inscription, "You have my heart and that is a permanent lock."
The motorcycle reached the bridge and stopped short. She turned and saw his eyes first. The beautiful crystal blue eyes that had stolen her heart so many years ago.
She did not even look down as she tore the ring from her finger. She threw it into the icy water far below the bridge. Her eyes stayed with his, anticipation slowly getting the better of the two of them.
She could hear the ring hit the icy water. The splash tore her eyes away from his. She looked down at the water and suddenly faced the other end of the bridge. Lucky was there staring at her.
In the middle of the bridge she saw both men at either side.
"I'm sorry." She whispered to Lucky before she ran into Jason's open arms. He twirled her around and lifted her up towards him. Their lips met for a soft passionate kiss before he put her on his motorcycle. He climbed on in front of her, she took hold of his waist, and then they drove off towards the sunrise. She did not look back towards Lucky.
She felt safe. She felt complete. And she felt free.
**************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** ************************************
She woke up in a cold sweat. She looked next to her and was disappointed to see who was sprawled out beside her.
'Why didn't I take his hand? Why didn't I run into his arms and never let go? Why did I put my dreams on hold and sacrifice everything for this 'Lucky'. The Lucky beside me is a stranger. He is not the man that I fell in love with as a naïve sixteen-year-old girl. I grew during the fire and after the brainwashing I told myself that everything could go back to how it was before. I knew it was a lie and I just kept on believing. Lucky was safe, familiar territory. Jason was dangerous, new territory.'
She slowly climbed out of bed. She went into another room and grabbed a simple sundress from the laundry room. She knew the dress was too warm for the late night weather but it was the last thing on her mind. She had to get away.
She walked to her studio. She knew that she had nothing to be afraid of, but in the back of her mind she could hear his voice telling her she should not walk alone at night. He had always worried about her. He had always been there when she needed him. But would he still be there? Would he still care about her? Would she allow herself to care about him again?
The building was dark but she took no notice. When she opened the door she was surprised by how much dust had settled and how the smell of stale paint lingered in the air. It had been years since she had been there. But she felt something when she walked in, she felt him. Every time she had gone to her studio after she had nursed Jason back to health she felt him there. That is why after a year of marriage she had stopped coming there. Every inch reminded her of Jason. Reminded her of the path she had not taken.
She ignored the dust and went to the closet. She opened it and reached down towards the back corner of the closet. Her hands quickly found what she was looking for. She pulled it out and looked at it in the darkness. Her eyes adjusted and she saw the faded colors on the canvas. And for a moment she felt him there with her. Seeing the painting was as comforting as his arms around her.
'Oh Jason. I should have gone with you. I should have told you how I felt. I should have realized that all I would find with Lucky was unhappiness. You made me feel again, Jason. Nothing means more to me than what we shared. Nothing, even Lucky, can ever compare. I need you, Jason. I denied it so long. I tried to forget you. I tried to move on. But my heart refuses to let me forget. I loved you Jason. I still love you.'
Tears she didn't know were falling came down. She only realized when she noticed the wet droplets on the canvas she held in front of her.
But all the sudden a sense of ease washed over her. She could sense him. She could smell him.
'He is here.'
She turned around and saw him in the doorway.
'This must be a dream.'
She closed her eyes and then opened them again. He was still there. She had to pinch herself before she knew it was real. It was real, he was there, he was really there.
'He's here. It's not a dream.'
She dropped the canvas. He walked slowly closer. He paused just a few inches from her.
"Jason." She said, barely above a whisper.
The tears came again. He took his hands and wiped the tears coming down and they refused to stop. It was just like before, the feeling she got inside when she saw him. It was like he never left and that time stood still.
"Why are you crying?" He asked, his voice low.
"Because you are here." She said, her tears still flowing.
He took her in his arms and pulled her close. Her head rested against his leather jacket. It smelled just like it had so many years ago. She could feel her tears wetting his leather jacket and she tried to pull away but he held her closer, reassuring her.
"Shhh. . ." He said, softly, as he caressed her back with his hands.
'This feels so right. I feel so right. I feel free.'