Author's Note: So we've come to this: ONLY ONE CHAPTER TO GO! I'm getting
all sentimental now *sob*. Heather, thank you as always for your review,
and Music, yours just cracked me up. "It's like if Confessions of Georgina
N. and The V.Secret Daries had Kinky sex and this was the offspring." Where
did you get the idea for that one? LOL.
I didn't know what position Warrington played in Entry 11, but now I know he's a Chaser so he's back as a Chaser in this chapter. Onward and upward!
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Chapter Nineteen: Next Time Will You Please Hit Him Harder, and Lower?
8:55 AM, November 8th
Roger knows his stuff. Did not wake up until Penelope, now our third Chaser, shook me awake the next morning, well, at a more reasonable time that same morning. "Get your fat arse out of bed, Natalia," she ordered crisply. "We have a game in an hour."
"Then I better have a cup of coffee sometime within that hour," I retorted, swinging my legs out of the tangle of bedcovers. "And for the sake of your physical well-being I hope you spelt "fat" with a P-H, not a F."
"Unlike you to be so optimistic this early in the morning," Penelope said, pulling her Quidditch sweater over her head. Since our talk in Moaning Myrtle's lair our relationship had changed from being arch-enemies to something more sisterly. Which meant that instead of covert dislike for decency's sake, we now practised outright hatred occasionally interrupted by brief moments of affection and consideration. One of these moments fortunately manifested itself in the coffee and plate of scrambled eggs that were shoved under my nose. "Now get a move on, you're the best Beater on the team and we can't afford you arriving fashionably late. Besides, a talent scout from the Holyhead Harpies will be at the game today."
I spat out some coffee.
"She's there mainly to watch the older girls, like our Vanessa and Bletchley from Slytherin," Penelope continued, "but the Harpies have an excellent youth program and it can't hurt to make a good impression early on. They've already offered Veronica Vector from Hufflepuff - who isn't a lesbian by the way - a contract and she's only sixteen. I know you have your career as a serial trophy wife well under way, but it can't hurt to keep your options open."
"The only trophy I'm interested in is the one that's up for grabs today," I told her. "Let's just shelve the animosity until Malfoys strung up by his balls, shall we?"
Penelope looked almost as shocked by my peace offering as I felt. "Deal," she said, leaning forward and shaking my hand. "All I've heard from him and Flint this week is how Ravenclaw has resorted to having Mudbloods on their team. You know, the wizarding world is the only one I've heard of that today still insists having a limited bloodline is a good thing."
"There's still the Muggle royal family," I pointed out, "but forget them. Let's show their little inbred arses why us mongrels rule." With that I downed the last of my coffee and reached for my uniform.
9:21 AM
Well, plus side of taking Cedric to the ball is that able to piss off Penelope and Cho and every other girl in the school to no end. Will have a gorgeous date that won't grab my arse or grope front of my "white" dress having just eaten chocolate cake with his hands. This last part doubly unlike since being gay, will not make a move on me, and, being gay, will actually bother to eat cake with fork. And being gay, will be able to dance. And actually want to. What more could I ask for, really?
A gorgeous date that can dance and actually wants to kiss me *sob*.
9:34 AM
Changing room atmosphere like nothing I had ever experienced before. Vanessa and Cho sitting together, squeezing eyes closed and clutching hands together in nerves and concentration. Malcolm leaning against wall and staring unseeingly out of window. Even Bombardino had forwent usual hyperactivity and instead of pacing around room, was sitting morosely in a worn leather armchair. In short, you would have found more cheer in the Malfoy Manor dining room.
Most tellingly, Roger did not snap at Penelope and I for being late.
It was up to me to insert some much-needed backbone into the situation. Crossing the room, I leaned down and took Cho by the shoulder. "You still up for that special move today?" I asked her. "Imagine the looks on their faces when we pull it off. They would never suspect anything like that from us."
"You bet," Cho grinned. "I owe Malfoy one from what he did to me last game. I also got this first year Muggle-born who's a boy scout to tie my cloak in a special knot that will stay secure, but when I tug it, it will come undone easily."
"Your special move is to have Cho "flash" Malfoy?" Roger asked. "Natalia," he hissed to me, "are you sure it will have the effect you want it to? I mean, Cho's not as "gifted," shall we say, as you are under there and - let's face it - they'll be expecting something like that after last weekend, and it's a stupid idea to begin with."
"It may very well be," I said. "Which is why I'm not using it. Keep your shirt on."
"I really hope Cho does," he said, crossing the room to go over some last minute strategies with the other two Chasers, Penelope and Malcolm. So this is what it's going to be like from now on, I realised as I pulled on my leather arm protectors and tightened the straps around my wrist, flexing my hands to make sure they weren't too tight. Exactly the same as it's been before. And really, why should it be any different?
All too soon it was quarter to ten. Prepared or not, we had to face them. Penelope sidled up to me as I stood waiting to fly out into the stadium. "Penny for your thoughts?" she quipped.
"Huh?" I blinked.
"It's a kind of Muggle currency, sort of like a Knut," she explained. "I was just wondering what you were thinking about. And it's a pun because the coin is a penny and my name is Penelope. Get it?"
Yeah, I get it alright, but that doesn't mean I think it's funny. "My thoughts wouldn't even be worth a Knut," I told her. In front of us Vanessa and Bombardino had taken off.
"If they're about Roger, I'd say they are," Penelope whispered. I froze. "Look, just forget about him for now. We have a game to play. Do you want to look back on this ten years from now and think about how you not only blew the most important game of your life so far, but a chance to be a pro Quidditch player, all because you were hung up about some boy? Ten years from now you would have completely forgotten he ever existed."
"You're right," I said. And she was - at least about some things. I shouldn't let this get in the way of me playing, this is what the rest of my life would be like from now on, pretending I didn't care about Roger in that way. But I would never forget him. That was what she was wrong about.
Spent ten minutes tossing the Quaffle back and forth and zooming around stadium, then it was time for Roger and Flint to shake hands like all good- natured athletes. Normally the rest of us hang out in our positions like those stupid hanging ceiling adornments they hang above babies' beds, but this time by a wordless, mutual agreement, we all flew down to Roger and dismounted, flanking him. I squinted my eyes at Flint and repeated "You're going to die, Scumbag" over and over in my head, willing him to look at me. Bombardino hit his bat into his palm threateningly. Even Cho looked fierce. Flint gave Roger's hand the wussiest shake I have ever seen and hurriedly leapt on to his broom. The rest of the Slyths looked gobsmacked. Bring it on.
"That," Roger said, turning around and facing us, "was awesome."
"Positions, please," Hooch snapped, striding to the centre of the stadium (You could use a few - I thought). I climbed back on to my Nimbus 2001 and soared back up just below Cho and Draco. "Hey, China girl," he leered at her, "want to join the Mile High Club today?" Yes, wizards do have that club using broomsticks in lieu of an aeroplane, but what the hell, he's only thirteen!
"You can grope my arse all you want, Malferret, if you can catch it, that is," Cho smirked back at him. Now I've really seen it all.
Hooch blasted her whistle and the game swung into action. Penelope reached the Quaffle first, Roger sliding in after her to prevent Flint from body- checking her in the worst way possible. Adrian caught up with Penelope and slammed into her side, trying to nudge her off-course and force her to drop the Quaffle. Penelope was gripping the broom as tightly as she could with her free hand, but under the force of Adrian's collisions one hand wasn't enough. She tucked the Quaffle in between her arms, now holding with both hands. Adrian took the opportunity to try and bat the Quaffle out of her grasp. A Bludger darted within my reach and I slammed it at him. He dropped down to avoid it and Penelope sped off.
"Is this because I won't go to the ball with you?" he called as he struggled to retain his balance.
"In your dreams," I retorted through gritted teeth. We were now neck-and- neck, chasing after Penelope as she zoomed towards goal. For good measure I banged into Adrian's side.
"My nightmares more like it, dearie," Adrian quipped, pulling ahead of my slightly. I angled my broom so that it knocked one of his hands free, making him lose balance enough for me to pull in front. "Enjoy this while it lasts, it's the closest you'll get to sex in a while."
"I don't know, I'm taking Cedric to the ball next weekend," I replied. Bombardino had sent a Bludger towards us, hopefully intended for Adrian, but I had seen something up ahead and had better uses for it. Intercepting the small black ball before it hit Adrian, I swung it towards Marcus Flint, who once again was up to no good with Penelope. She ducked. He didn't. Losing his balance, Flint grabbed hold of Bletchy's broom, causing her to tip forward. Penelope took advantage of the situation to disrupt the virgin scoreline. I pumped my fist in the air. Adrian swore.
We had barely drawn breath when they were on us, pelting towards our goal. Vanessa was a good Keeper, but had an unfortunate habit of drifting off towards one side of the six hoops instead of staying in the centre until she had a goal to defend. I managed to get in front of Montague and block his shot on goal, giving Vanessa enough time to fly across and scoop it up.
"Vanessa, stop flying over to the side!" I called to her. "Either stay in the centre or circle the hoops, but don't fly and stay over to one side!"
"Good call, Nat," Roger said as he flew past me.
Malcolm had darted off with the Quaffle. Slytherin Beater Bole, a guy with a build that would make an ape look like Colin Farrell, was eyeing a Bludger assessingly as it bounced around in front of him. There was no way I could reach it before he did, but I managed to charge into him as he hit it, completely wreaking his aim. Instead of hurling towards Malcolm it knocked Bletchley off her broom and Malcolm hurled the Quaffle through a hoop. Twenty-Zero us.
"Great tactics, Nat," Roger encouraged. "You're really on fire today!"
Actually the whole team was on fire. Recognising our superior skill, the Slytherin team were playing dirtier than a cave troll's arse, trying to intimidate us out of our game, but we were playing with a grit you wouldn't have suspected we had after watching us bawl over ninety percent papers. Roger was using his role as a defensive Chaser superbly, flying alongside Malcolm and Penelope and disrupting the play of the Slytherin Chasers to give them more space. Hardly anyone could touch our Chasers because of the hailstorm of Bludgers Bombardino and I were sending towards the Snakes. Vanessa had stopped veering off to the side and was defending the hoops with the agility of a spidermonkey. We were leading by four goals. Then-
"NATALIA! NATALIA!" Cho screamed. "IT'S TIME!"
Cho and Draco were powering towards the Snitch. Warrington and Montague had pulled up in front of the pair. They were going to try and block Cho. Draco was going to get the Snitch. There wasn't a Bludger in sight. I gritted my teeth and sprinted my broomstick towards them, the air slapping my face with the force of my flight.
"AHHH!" they cried, and sprang apart in front of me. I managed to pull out of the way of the two Seekers, my mind whirring with what I should do to help Cho. The move we had practised required a Bludger. There were still none around me. Bombardino had reached one but seemed unsure of what to do. The angle he had to swerve it was very tight, and he was too far away to be sure of hitting Draco and not Cho.
"BOMBARDINO!" I roared. "HIT IT AT ME! QUICK!"
Bombardino hesitated, then powered the ball towards me. As it smacked into my own bat I released my broom and caught it against the bat with my left hand, preventing it from ricocheting away with the force of it's collision. My hand now throbbing painfully, I forced it back around my broom handle and charged off after Draco and Cho, wondering how on earth I could catch them in time. I was giving the Bludger weak hits as I flew, trying to keep it with me but not wanting to hit it too hard in case it flew away.
A Slytherin Beater was baring down on the second Bludger, his eye hooked menacingly on Cho. "Natalia! Take him out!" Roger ordered.
"I can't!" I cried. "I need this Bludger!"
The Beater had reached the Bludger and swung it towards Cho. Her eyes were trained on the Snitch. She wouldn't see it coming. But quicker still was Roger. He sped off towards the Bludger and caught it flat in the stomach. The Ravenclaw stand shrieked as he wavered, then started to fall off his broom.
"ROGER!" I screamed.
"I'll get him!" Vanessa cried. Since the start of Cho and Draco's chase everyone had abandoned their normal game plans and were doing their best to help our Seeker. "Stop Draco, or else it will all be a waste. STOP DRACO!"
I ducked down below to collect the Bludger from where it had fallen after I had stopped hitting it in my shock. Vanesssa was bearing down on Roger. Cho and Draco had swerved around and were heading to my left. Vanessa had caught Roger and was beginning to sink under his weight. To my right Flint's face whitened in dismay, realising what was about to go down. Pushing everything else to the back of my mind, I sped off to cut the Seekers off, then stopped about thirty yards in front of them, cocking my arm to hurl the Bludger. "NOW, CHO!" I howled.
Cho's free hand came up around her neck and she tugged open her cloak. The garment flew backwards into Draco's face and I swung the Bludger at him. Flint slammed into me and my broomstick spun out of control. Cho flipped her broomstick so that the ball hurtled over the top her of and smacked into Draco. The Slytherin Seeker gave a howl of pain and the Ravenclaw Seeker strained forward, her hand snaking around the Snitch. Madame Hooch blew her whistle. It was all over.
Penelope screamed and threw her arms around me, which was a good thing because I wasn't sure how much longer I could stay on my broom unaided. My head was spinning from the force of Flint's collision and the hand I had trapped the Bludger with was beginning to go numb. Then we were both thrown backwards as Bombardino flew into us, dropping multitudes of sloppy kisses on our cheeks and shouting, "I love women! I love women!" Somehow we ended up down on the ground, surrounded by a pack of Ravenclaw supporters. I had never been hit on my back so many times in my life. The herd of happy housemates closed in around us and I found myself face to face with Roger.
"Great move back there, Nat," he said, one hand pressed against his ribcage awkwardly. "And you were right. I am a coward."
Coward? I blinked. What was cowardly about charging down a Bludger? But before I could ask him fresh supporters cut in between us, pressing their congratulations upon me. I smiled and tried not to cry out when they shook my swollen hand, all the while glancing over the top of everyone's heads for Roger. Across the other end of the pitch I spotted a miserable huddle of Slytherin players, goaded on by Gryffindors. Huh, I thought part of being heroic was having good sportsmanship. Apparently not. Damn, where was that boy?
"Natalia?" A small hand tugged on my sleeve, and I looked down to see a pair of glasses nestled below a lightning-shaped scar. "I'm Harry Potter. I just wanted to congratulate you on your win today. You also might like to know that there's a representative from the Holyhead Harpies in the teacher's box looking for you."
"Me?" My throat went dry. "But this isn't even my position. I normally play as Seeker."
"Well, apparently she thought you were okay," Harry said. He glanced down at the ground awkwardly, then his head jerked back up and he was smiling. "Can you just do me one small favour, Seeker to Seeker?"
"Depends what the favour is," I told him. "I don't really do paedophilia, you know."
"Paedo-what?" Harry squinted.
"Nevermind," I told him. "Now what is it that you want, pip-squeak?"
"Well," Harry began, beaming, "I mean, not that what you did with Draco wasn't totally cool and all, but the next time you pull off something like that, will you please hit him harder, and lower, if you know what I mean? The Malfoy family lines been going on a bit too long."
"I'll see what I do," I replied, more than a little shocked. His Royal Potterness, encouraging the dismemberment of fellow students (and when I say "dismemberment," I mean disMEMBERment)? "And you might want to make a run for it. I see a bunch of impossibly-developed girls wearing Gryffindor scarves heading your way."
"Thanks," Harry gulped and ran off.
"Oi, Adani," Malcolm called. "Party in the changing room in five minutes!"
"I'll catch you there later," I shouted back. "I have to meet someone." Pushing my way through the crowd of students, I made my way towards the teacher's tower.
Life is really bloody good.
12:52 PM
Met up with Harpies rep, who was tall, lanky woman with nose broken several times from Bludgers. Really, someone should tell these poor pureblood witches about the joys of plastic surgery. Perhaps Mommy could help her out? Actually, maybe not the best idea since am trying to stay on this woman's good side. Basically told me that she's banking on me improving a lot over next two years, but since it is first time playing in this position and if I improve at the same rate, I should have place in reserve team with my name on it. Woo hoo! Only downside is that will not play as Seeker since professional league requires smallest, fastest players possible for that position, but don't really care since am not a glory hunter or attention seeker at all - why are you laughing?
1:02 PM
Made way up to Ravenclaw changing room, hand now feeling as though it's been sat on by Hagrid with Pansy Parkinson on his lap. Penelope will be able to cast freezing spell on it once I'm up there. Speaking of, why is it so quiet? Shouldn't a house that just won the championship from under the nose of the meanest team in the school be throwing televisions out of the window by now?
Pushed open door and got one hell of a fright. No, it wasn't Penelope and Weasley fucking, but something almost as bad. No, not Vanessa and Bombardino fucking either - look, will you just be patient? Crowded together in the centre of the room was our Quidditch team with a collection of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs, some quite young and frightened looking - although I don't know how those Gryffs could be afraid of anything after Hermione Grater's hair - who was also there along with the other two in the threesome. With their wands pointed in a semi-circle around them was the entire Slytherin team. Montague, the attractive blond Chaser, swung around as I entered, his wand now pointing squarely between my two-most prised possessions.
"Hello, Natalia," he drawled coolly as I stood in the doorway. "So glad you could come and join us. The Slytherins have decided that in order to congratulate you on your victory and build up goodwill between the rest of the houses, we should play a little game together."
"We do apologise for gate-crashing," Warrington smirked. I gaped at him. Slytherins are like cheerleaders or fraternity boys. They're fine as individuals, but once you get them together something happens to them that isn't entirely pretty.
"Have you heard of the Muggle games "I Have Never" and "Truth or Dare"?" Montague continued, smiling icily. "Rather quaint and drole, but far more interesting when you play them with, say, the Veritasium we brewed up earlier. Do come in. We're just about to begin."
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A/N: Next, the (final) Truth and Dare chapter in which heaps of mishaps happen to all my favourite Hogwarts students and Natalia's romantic situation is finally resolved. Woo hoo!
I didn't know what position Warrington played in Entry 11, but now I know he's a Chaser so he's back as a Chaser in this chapter. Onward and upward!
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Chapter Nineteen: Next Time Will You Please Hit Him Harder, and Lower?
8:55 AM, November 8th
Roger knows his stuff. Did not wake up until Penelope, now our third Chaser, shook me awake the next morning, well, at a more reasonable time that same morning. "Get your fat arse out of bed, Natalia," she ordered crisply. "We have a game in an hour."
"Then I better have a cup of coffee sometime within that hour," I retorted, swinging my legs out of the tangle of bedcovers. "And for the sake of your physical well-being I hope you spelt "fat" with a P-H, not a F."
"Unlike you to be so optimistic this early in the morning," Penelope said, pulling her Quidditch sweater over her head. Since our talk in Moaning Myrtle's lair our relationship had changed from being arch-enemies to something more sisterly. Which meant that instead of covert dislike for decency's sake, we now practised outright hatred occasionally interrupted by brief moments of affection and consideration. One of these moments fortunately manifested itself in the coffee and plate of scrambled eggs that were shoved under my nose. "Now get a move on, you're the best Beater on the team and we can't afford you arriving fashionably late. Besides, a talent scout from the Holyhead Harpies will be at the game today."
I spat out some coffee.
"She's there mainly to watch the older girls, like our Vanessa and Bletchley from Slytherin," Penelope continued, "but the Harpies have an excellent youth program and it can't hurt to make a good impression early on. They've already offered Veronica Vector from Hufflepuff - who isn't a lesbian by the way - a contract and she's only sixteen. I know you have your career as a serial trophy wife well under way, but it can't hurt to keep your options open."
"The only trophy I'm interested in is the one that's up for grabs today," I told her. "Let's just shelve the animosity until Malfoys strung up by his balls, shall we?"
Penelope looked almost as shocked by my peace offering as I felt. "Deal," she said, leaning forward and shaking my hand. "All I've heard from him and Flint this week is how Ravenclaw has resorted to having Mudbloods on their team. You know, the wizarding world is the only one I've heard of that today still insists having a limited bloodline is a good thing."
"There's still the Muggle royal family," I pointed out, "but forget them. Let's show their little inbred arses why us mongrels rule." With that I downed the last of my coffee and reached for my uniform.
9:21 AM
Well, plus side of taking Cedric to the ball is that able to piss off Penelope and Cho and every other girl in the school to no end. Will have a gorgeous date that won't grab my arse or grope front of my "white" dress having just eaten chocolate cake with his hands. This last part doubly unlike since being gay, will not make a move on me, and, being gay, will actually bother to eat cake with fork. And being gay, will be able to dance. And actually want to. What more could I ask for, really?
A gorgeous date that can dance and actually wants to kiss me *sob*.
9:34 AM
Changing room atmosphere like nothing I had ever experienced before. Vanessa and Cho sitting together, squeezing eyes closed and clutching hands together in nerves and concentration. Malcolm leaning against wall and staring unseeingly out of window. Even Bombardino had forwent usual hyperactivity and instead of pacing around room, was sitting morosely in a worn leather armchair. In short, you would have found more cheer in the Malfoy Manor dining room.
Most tellingly, Roger did not snap at Penelope and I for being late.
It was up to me to insert some much-needed backbone into the situation. Crossing the room, I leaned down and took Cho by the shoulder. "You still up for that special move today?" I asked her. "Imagine the looks on their faces when we pull it off. They would never suspect anything like that from us."
"You bet," Cho grinned. "I owe Malfoy one from what he did to me last game. I also got this first year Muggle-born who's a boy scout to tie my cloak in a special knot that will stay secure, but when I tug it, it will come undone easily."
"Your special move is to have Cho "flash" Malfoy?" Roger asked. "Natalia," he hissed to me, "are you sure it will have the effect you want it to? I mean, Cho's not as "gifted," shall we say, as you are under there and - let's face it - they'll be expecting something like that after last weekend, and it's a stupid idea to begin with."
"It may very well be," I said. "Which is why I'm not using it. Keep your shirt on."
"I really hope Cho does," he said, crossing the room to go over some last minute strategies with the other two Chasers, Penelope and Malcolm. So this is what it's going to be like from now on, I realised as I pulled on my leather arm protectors and tightened the straps around my wrist, flexing my hands to make sure they weren't too tight. Exactly the same as it's been before. And really, why should it be any different?
All too soon it was quarter to ten. Prepared or not, we had to face them. Penelope sidled up to me as I stood waiting to fly out into the stadium. "Penny for your thoughts?" she quipped.
"Huh?" I blinked.
"It's a kind of Muggle currency, sort of like a Knut," she explained. "I was just wondering what you were thinking about. And it's a pun because the coin is a penny and my name is Penelope. Get it?"
Yeah, I get it alright, but that doesn't mean I think it's funny. "My thoughts wouldn't even be worth a Knut," I told her. In front of us Vanessa and Bombardino had taken off.
"If they're about Roger, I'd say they are," Penelope whispered. I froze. "Look, just forget about him for now. We have a game to play. Do you want to look back on this ten years from now and think about how you not only blew the most important game of your life so far, but a chance to be a pro Quidditch player, all because you were hung up about some boy? Ten years from now you would have completely forgotten he ever existed."
"You're right," I said. And she was - at least about some things. I shouldn't let this get in the way of me playing, this is what the rest of my life would be like from now on, pretending I didn't care about Roger in that way. But I would never forget him. That was what she was wrong about.
Spent ten minutes tossing the Quaffle back and forth and zooming around stadium, then it was time for Roger and Flint to shake hands like all good- natured athletes. Normally the rest of us hang out in our positions like those stupid hanging ceiling adornments they hang above babies' beds, but this time by a wordless, mutual agreement, we all flew down to Roger and dismounted, flanking him. I squinted my eyes at Flint and repeated "You're going to die, Scumbag" over and over in my head, willing him to look at me. Bombardino hit his bat into his palm threateningly. Even Cho looked fierce. Flint gave Roger's hand the wussiest shake I have ever seen and hurriedly leapt on to his broom. The rest of the Slyths looked gobsmacked. Bring it on.
"That," Roger said, turning around and facing us, "was awesome."
"Positions, please," Hooch snapped, striding to the centre of the stadium (You could use a few - I thought). I climbed back on to my Nimbus 2001 and soared back up just below Cho and Draco. "Hey, China girl," he leered at her, "want to join the Mile High Club today?" Yes, wizards do have that club using broomsticks in lieu of an aeroplane, but what the hell, he's only thirteen!
"You can grope my arse all you want, Malferret, if you can catch it, that is," Cho smirked back at him. Now I've really seen it all.
Hooch blasted her whistle and the game swung into action. Penelope reached the Quaffle first, Roger sliding in after her to prevent Flint from body- checking her in the worst way possible. Adrian caught up with Penelope and slammed into her side, trying to nudge her off-course and force her to drop the Quaffle. Penelope was gripping the broom as tightly as she could with her free hand, but under the force of Adrian's collisions one hand wasn't enough. She tucked the Quaffle in between her arms, now holding with both hands. Adrian took the opportunity to try and bat the Quaffle out of her grasp. A Bludger darted within my reach and I slammed it at him. He dropped down to avoid it and Penelope sped off.
"Is this because I won't go to the ball with you?" he called as he struggled to retain his balance.
"In your dreams," I retorted through gritted teeth. We were now neck-and- neck, chasing after Penelope as she zoomed towards goal. For good measure I banged into Adrian's side.
"My nightmares more like it, dearie," Adrian quipped, pulling ahead of my slightly. I angled my broom so that it knocked one of his hands free, making him lose balance enough for me to pull in front. "Enjoy this while it lasts, it's the closest you'll get to sex in a while."
"I don't know, I'm taking Cedric to the ball next weekend," I replied. Bombardino had sent a Bludger towards us, hopefully intended for Adrian, but I had seen something up ahead and had better uses for it. Intercepting the small black ball before it hit Adrian, I swung it towards Marcus Flint, who once again was up to no good with Penelope. She ducked. He didn't. Losing his balance, Flint grabbed hold of Bletchy's broom, causing her to tip forward. Penelope took advantage of the situation to disrupt the virgin scoreline. I pumped my fist in the air. Adrian swore.
We had barely drawn breath when they were on us, pelting towards our goal. Vanessa was a good Keeper, but had an unfortunate habit of drifting off towards one side of the six hoops instead of staying in the centre until she had a goal to defend. I managed to get in front of Montague and block his shot on goal, giving Vanessa enough time to fly across and scoop it up.
"Vanessa, stop flying over to the side!" I called to her. "Either stay in the centre or circle the hoops, but don't fly and stay over to one side!"
"Good call, Nat," Roger said as he flew past me.
Malcolm had darted off with the Quaffle. Slytherin Beater Bole, a guy with a build that would make an ape look like Colin Farrell, was eyeing a Bludger assessingly as it bounced around in front of him. There was no way I could reach it before he did, but I managed to charge into him as he hit it, completely wreaking his aim. Instead of hurling towards Malcolm it knocked Bletchley off her broom and Malcolm hurled the Quaffle through a hoop. Twenty-Zero us.
"Great tactics, Nat," Roger encouraged. "You're really on fire today!"
Actually the whole team was on fire. Recognising our superior skill, the Slytherin team were playing dirtier than a cave troll's arse, trying to intimidate us out of our game, but we were playing with a grit you wouldn't have suspected we had after watching us bawl over ninety percent papers. Roger was using his role as a defensive Chaser superbly, flying alongside Malcolm and Penelope and disrupting the play of the Slytherin Chasers to give them more space. Hardly anyone could touch our Chasers because of the hailstorm of Bludgers Bombardino and I were sending towards the Snakes. Vanessa had stopped veering off to the side and was defending the hoops with the agility of a spidermonkey. We were leading by four goals. Then-
"NATALIA! NATALIA!" Cho screamed. "IT'S TIME!"
Cho and Draco were powering towards the Snitch. Warrington and Montague had pulled up in front of the pair. They were going to try and block Cho. Draco was going to get the Snitch. There wasn't a Bludger in sight. I gritted my teeth and sprinted my broomstick towards them, the air slapping my face with the force of my flight.
"AHHH!" they cried, and sprang apart in front of me. I managed to pull out of the way of the two Seekers, my mind whirring with what I should do to help Cho. The move we had practised required a Bludger. There were still none around me. Bombardino had reached one but seemed unsure of what to do. The angle he had to swerve it was very tight, and he was too far away to be sure of hitting Draco and not Cho.
"BOMBARDINO!" I roared. "HIT IT AT ME! QUICK!"
Bombardino hesitated, then powered the ball towards me. As it smacked into my own bat I released my broom and caught it against the bat with my left hand, preventing it from ricocheting away with the force of it's collision. My hand now throbbing painfully, I forced it back around my broom handle and charged off after Draco and Cho, wondering how on earth I could catch them in time. I was giving the Bludger weak hits as I flew, trying to keep it with me but not wanting to hit it too hard in case it flew away.
A Slytherin Beater was baring down on the second Bludger, his eye hooked menacingly on Cho. "Natalia! Take him out!" Roger ordered.
"I can't!" I cried. "I need this Bludger!"
The Beater had reached the Bludger and swung it towards Cho. Her eyes were trained on the Snitch. She wouldn't see it coming. But quicker still was Roger. He sped off towards the Bludger and caught it flat in the stomach. The Ravenclaw stand shrieked as he wavered, then started to fall off his broom.
"ROGER!" I screamed.
"I'll get him!" Vanessa cried. Since the start of Cho and Draco's chase everyone had abandoned their normal game plans and were doing their best to help our Seeker. "Stop Draco, or else it will all be a waste. STOP DRACO!"
I ducked down below to collect the Bludger from where it had fallen after I had stopped hitting it in my shock. Vanesssa was bearing down on Roger. Cho and Draco had swerved around and were heading to my left. Vanessa had caught Roger and was beginning to sink under his weight. To my right Flint's face whitened in dismay, realising what was about to go down. Pushing everything else to the back of my mind, I sped off to cut the Seekers off, then stopped about thirty yards in front of them, cocking my arm to hurl the Bludger. "NOW, CHO!" I howled.
Cho's free hand came up around her neck and she tugged open her cloak. The garment flew backwards into Draco's face and I swung the Bludger at him. Flint slammed into me and my broomstick spun out of control. Cho flipped her broomstick so that the ball hurtled over the top her of and smacked into Draco. The Slytherin Seeker gave a howl of pain and the Ravenclaw Seeker strained forward, her hand snaking around the Snitch. Madame Hooch blew her whistle. It was all over.
Penelope screamed and threw her arms around me, which was a good thing because I wasn't sure how much longer I could stay on my broom unaided. My head was spinning from the force of Flint's collision and the hand I had trapped the Bludger with was beginning to go numb. Then we were both thrown backwards as Bombardino flew into us, dropping multitudes of sloppy kisses on our cheeks and shouting, "I love women! I love women!" Somehow we ended up down on the ground, surrounded by a pack of Ravenclaw supporters. I had never been hit on my back so many times in my life. The herd of happy housemates closed in around us and I found myself face to face with Roger.
"Great move back there, Nat," he said, one hand pressed against his ribcage awkwardly. "And you were right. I am a coward."
Coward? I blinked. What was cowardly about charging down a Bludger? But before I could ask him fresh supporters cut in between us, pressing their congratulations upon me. I smiled and tried not to cry out when they shook my swollen hand, all the while glancing over the top of everyone's heads for Roger. Across the other end of the pitch I spotted a miserable huddle of Slytherin players, goaded on by Gryffindors. Huh, I thought part of being heroic was having good sportsmanship. Apparently not. Damn, where was that boy?
"Natalia?" A small hand tugged on my sleeve, and I looked down to see a pair of glasses nestled below a lightning-shaped scar. "I'm Harry Potter. I just wanted to congratulate you on your win today. You also might like to know that there's a representative from the Holyhead Harpies in the teacher's box looking for you."
"Me?" My throat went dry. "But this isn't even my position. I normally play as Seeker."
"Well, apparently she thought you were okay," Harry said. He glanced down at the ground awkwardly, then his head jerked back up and he was smiling. "Can you just do me one small favour, Seeker to Seeker?"
"Depends what the favour is," I told him. "I don't really do paedophilia, you know."
"Paedo-what?" Harry squinted.
"Nevermind," I told him. "Now what is it that you want, pip-squeak?"
"Well," Harry began, beaming, "I mean, not that what you did with Draco wasn't totally cool and all, but the next time you pull off something like that, will you please hit him harder, and lower, if you know what I mean? The Malfoy family lines been going on a bit too long."
"I'll see what I do," I replied, more than a little shocked. His Royal Potterness, encouraging the dismemberment of fellow students (and when I say "dismemberment," I mean disMEMBERment)? "And you might want to make a run for it. I see a bunch of impossibly-developed girls wearing Gryffindor scarves heading your way."
"Thanks," Harry gulped and ran off.
"Oi, Adani," Malcolm called. "Party in the changing room in five minutes!"
"I'll catch you there later," I shouted back. "I have to meet someone." Pushing my way through the crowd of students, I made my way towards the teacher's tower.
Life is really bloody good.
12:52 PM
Met up with Harpies rep, who was tall, lanky woman with nose broken several times from Bludgers. Really, someone should tell these poor pureblood witches about the joys of plastic surgery. Perhaps Mommy could help her out? Actually, maybe not the best idea since am trying to stay on this woman's good side. Basically told me that she's banking on me improving a lot over next two years, but since it is first time playing in this position and if I improve at the same rate, I should have place in reserve team with my name on it. Woo hoo! Only downside is that will not play as Seeker since professional league requires smallest, fastest players possible for that position, but don't really care since am not a glory hunter or attention seeker at all - why are you laughing?
1:02 PM
Made way up to Ravenclaw changing room, hand now feeling as though it's been sat on by Hagrid with Pansy Parkinson on his lap. Penelope will be able to cast freezing spell on it once I'm up there. Speaking of, why is it so quiet? Shouldn't a house that just won the championship from under the nose of the meanest team in the school be throwing televisions out of the window by now?
Pushed open door and got one hell of a fright. No, it wasn't Penelope and Weasley fucking, but something almost as bad. No, not Vanessa and Bombardino fucking either - look, will you just be patient? Crowded together in the centre of the room was our Quidditch team with a collection of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs, some quite young and frightened looking - although I don't know how those Gryffs could be afraid of anything after Hermione Grater's hair - who was also there along with the other two in the threesome. With their wands pointed in a semi-circle around them was the entire Slytherin team. Montague, the attractive blond Chaser, swung around as I entered, his wand now pointing squarely between my two-most prised possessions.
"Hello, Natalia," he drawled coolly as I stood in the doorway. "So glad you could come and join us. The Slytherins have decided that in order to congratulate you on your victory and build up goodwill between the rest of the houses, we should play a little game together."
"We do apologise for gate-crashing," Warrington smirked. I gaped at him. Slytherins are like cheerleaders or fraternity boys. They're fine as individuals, but once you get them together something happens to them that isn't entirely pretty.
"Have you heard of the Muggle games "I Have Never" and "Truth or Dare"?" Montague continued, smiling icily. "Rather quaint and drole, but far more interesting when you play them with, say, the Veritasium we brewed up earlier. Do come in. We're just about to begin."
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A/N: Next, the (final) Truth and Dare chapter in which heaps of mishaps happen to all my favourite Hogwarts students and Natalia's romantic situation is finally resolved. Woo hoo!