Author's Note: Recognize it, it's not mine. Thanks to my beta Liz.
Please Read and Review, thanks and enjoy.
Harry quietly sighed as he heard someone loudly rap upon his door. Quickly rolling over and swinging his legs off the bed, he stumbled over to the door and opened it.
"Mon fils? I'm sorry if I woke you, but it's time for you to be getting ready anyway. And I kinda wanted to talk to you about something, mate." Sirius said almost apologetically, as Harry tiredly rubbed his eyes.
" 's 'right Siri, c'mon in." Harry mumbled to his godfather, stepping back to allow him entrance. Noticing that he was standing before his godfather in only his boxers, Harry hastily began rummaging through his closet looking for the clothes he was going to wear to the funeral. Sirius was looking rather dashing this morning, if Harry did think so himself. He was currently donning a gray robe that was unclasped revealing his long sleeved black dress shirt and black trousers with red trim around the bottom. It looked as though Remus had done his hair this morning as it was beautifully styled and shiny. Remus liked shiny things.
"I see Remus had his way with your hair this morning, Siri." Harry chuckled, walking over to his bed and placing his clothes down on it. Sirius just snorted, not admitting to anything. Sirius loved Remus and if allowing him to do Sirius' hair would make his lover happy, he'd do it without hesitation.
Pulling an undershirt over his head, Harry spoke, "What is it you wanted to talk to me about then?" He then proceeded to slip into his loose black trousers and black form-fitted shirt. Walking over to his dresser, he ran a brush through his always-unruly hair and sprayed a little cologne on his wrists, swiftly rubbing them together. Spying the ring, Harry casually slipped it onto the ring finger on his left hand. If Sirius noticed his godson doing this, he didn't let on.
"Well, I wanted to tell you that I think it's really, erhm, brave for a lack of a better word, that you're going to Draco's funeral." Sirius stuttered. A look of confusion played on Harry's face as he raised an eyebrow. "Well, I didn't go to your parents," his head dropped, ashamed, "I couldn't bring myself to do it and that is the one thing I regret most deeply in my life. I missed my last chance to say goodbye to them. To tell them that I loved them." He paused, his eyes filling with tears unshed over the years, "So, I wanted to tell you that I respect you even more now, I love you Har." He finished feebly, unsure of how Harry would react.
Harry responded by walking over to his godfather and wrapping him in a tight embrace. Noticing his godfather's tear filled eyes, he spoke quietly, "Sirius, you didn't need to tell them you loved them, they already knew. They still know." Harry sat down next to him. "You'll see them again, Padfoot, just like I'll see Draco again. You have to believe. And I love you too." Harry rested his head on his godfather's shoulder.
"You are so much stronger than I am, Har, I don't know how you do it. If I ever lost Remus."Sirius left the rest of the thought unspoken, knowing he wouldn't be able to control his tears if he finished it.
"I hope you don't think I was always this strong." Harry smiled sadly and lifted his head so he could look at Sirius, "In the very beginning.there was nothing more that I would have liked than to kill myself." Sirius flinched at the mention of this, but nodded for Harry to continue, "But I knew that I couldn't. I didn't deserve to be with him, not after the fact that it was my fault he died, if I hadn't convinced him." Harry realized mid-sentence what he was confessing and froze, petrified.
"What?!" Sirius asked, quite alarmed.
"N-nothing. I just m-meant that if I hadn't of fallen in love with Draco that he wouldn't have been k-killed." Harry sputtered unconvincingly. He tried to get up and off the bed, but Sirius gently pulled him back down. There was an odd look in his eyes, a look that Harry had never seen before.
"Harry, please tell me what happened." Sirius asked, his voice painfully soft. Wincing at Sirius' tone, Harry rehashed the story he told Ron the previous night.
"I thought we trusted each other Harry. I thought you knew you could come to me anytime, about anything, and if you were ever in trouble I'd do whatever it took to help you. What did I do that made you distrust me? God, James would be so ashamed of me right now."Sirius hung his head and began to silently weep.
At the precise moment, Remus burst into Harry's room. Seeing his husband in so much anguish, Remus ran over to him. He quickly sat on the bed and pulled Sirius into a loving embrace. Holding him closely, he began to rock him back and forth in an attempt to calm him down. When Sirius cried he really let it all out, but this was different, these were silent tears. Remus had only seen him cry like that one other time in his life, after Lily and James' death. He had to be in immense pain for him to cry like this, and Remus needed to know exactly what was making his love hurt.
"Would someone care to tell me what precisely is going on here?" Remus gently asked. Sirius detached himself from his lover's arms, stood, and walked to the door.
"Why don't you ask Harry. I'm sure he'll tell you, he trusts you a lot more than he trusts me." Sirius said sadly before walking out of the room, closing the door softly behind himself.
Harry quietly sighed as he heard someone loudly rap upon his door. Quickly rolling over and swinging his legs off the bed, he stumbled over to the door and opened it.
"Mon fils? I'm sorry if I woke you, but it's time for you to be getting ready anyway. And I kinda wanted to talk to you about something, mate." Sirius said almost apologetically, as Harry tiredly rubbed his eyes.
" 's 'right Siri, c'mon in." Harry mumbled to his godfather, stepping back to allow him entrance. Noticing that he was standing before his godfather in only his boxers, Harry hastily began rummaging through his closet looking for the clothes he was going to wear to the funeral. Sirius was looking rather dashing this morning, if Harry did think so himself. He was currently donning a gray robe that was unclasped revealing his long sleeved black dress shirt and black trousers with red trim around the bottom. It looked as though Remus had done his hair this morning as it was beautifully styled and shiny. Remus liked shiny things.
"I see Remus had his way with your hair this morning, Siri." Harry chuckled, walking over to his bed and placing his clothes down on it. Sirius just snorted, not admitting to anything. Sirius loved Remus and if allowing him to do Sirius' hair would make his lover happy, he'd do it without hesitation.
Pulling an undershirt over his head, Harry spoke, "What is it you wanted to talk to me about then?" He then proceeded to slip into his loose black trousers and black form-fitted shirt. Walking over to his dresser, he ran a brush through his always-unruly hair and sprayed a little cologne on his wrists, swiftly rubbing them together. Spying the ring, Harry casually slipped it onto the ring finger on his left hand. If Sirius noticed his godson doing this, he didn't let on.
"Well, I wanted to tell you that I think it's really, erhm, brave for a lack of a better word, that you're going to Draco's funeral." Sirius stuttered. A look of confusion played on Harry's face as he raised an eyebrow. "Well, I didn't go to your parents," his head dropped, ashamed, "I couldn't bring myself to do it and that is the one thing I regret most deeply in my life. I missed my last chance to say goodbye to them. To tell them that I loved them." He paused, his eyes filling with tears unshed over the years, "So, I wanted to tell you that I respect you even more now, I love you Har." He finished feebly, unsure of how Harry would react.
Harry responded by walking over to his godfather and wrapping him in a tight embrace. Noticing his godfather's tear filled eyes, he spoke quietly, "Sirius, you didn't need to tell them you loved them, they already knew. They still know." Harry sat down next to him. "You'll see them again, Padfoot, just like I'll see Draco again. You have to believe. And I love you too." Harry rested his head on his godfather's shoulder.
"You are so much stronger than I am, Har, I don't know how you do it. If I ever lost Remus."Sirius left the rest of the thought unspoken, knowing he wouldn't be able to control his tears if he finished it.
"I hope you don't think I was always this strong." Harry smiled sadly and lifted his head so he could look at Sirius, "In the very beginning.there was nothing more that I would have liked than to kill myself." Sirius flinched at the mention of this, but nodded for Harry to continue, "But I knew that I couldn't. I didn't deserve to be with him, not after the fact that it was my fault he died, if I hadn't convinced him." Harry realized mid-sentence what he was confessing and froze, petrified.
"What?!" Sirius asked, quite alarmed.
"N-nothing. I just m-meant that if I hadn't of fallen in love with Draco that he wouldn't have been k-killed." Harry sputtered unconvincingly. He tried to get up and off the bed, but Sirius gently pulled him back down. There was an odd look in his eyes, a look that Harry had never seen before.
"Harry, please tell me what happened." Sirius asked, his voice painfully soft. Wincing at Sirius' tone, Harry rehashed the story he told Ron the previous night.
"I thought we trusted each other Harry. I thought you knew you could come to me anytime, about anything, and if you were ever in trouble I'd do whatever it took to help you. What did I do that made you distrust me? God, James would be so ashamed of me right now."Sirius hung his head and began to silently weep.
At the precise moment, Remus burst into Harry's room. Seeing his husband in so much anguish, Remus ran over to him. He quickly sat on the bed and pulled Sirius into a loving embrace. Holding him closely, he began to rock him back and forth in an attempt to calm him down. When Sirius cried he really let it all out, but this was different, these were silent tears. Remus had only seen him cry like that one other time in his life, after Lily and James' death. He had to be in immense pain for him to cry like this, and Remus needed to know exactly what was making his love hurt.
"Would someone care to tell me what precisely is going on here?" Remus gently asked. Sirius detached himself from his lover's arms, stood, and walked to the door.
"Why don't you ask Harry. I'm sure he'll tell you, he trusts you a lot more than he trusts me." Sirius said sadly before walking out of the room, closing the door softly behind himself.