Jesse's face fell when I stared blankly at him. My lips were curved into a half smile, reflecting my joy and concern. He tried to look into my eyes and read my emotions, but I had been a telempath far to long to be as easily read as that.
We stayed like that for a long time, him on the ground holding out a ring to me, standing up, our eyes locked, his daring mine to open up.
"Why not?" he asked, dropping his hands and standing up so we were level. It was so characteristic of him to analyze everything and then try to fix it.
I stared at him a long time. He looked hurt, but for the moment he had put his hurt aside to quench his insatiable curiosity. I offered him a weak smile which didn't reassure him.
"It's not you," I stammered, not knowing what was wrong with me.
"It's not about what happened last year, is it?" he asked.
"I don't know," I told him. He looked into my shielded eyes and put the velvet cased ring in his pocket. Then he placed his hands securely on my hips.
A small tear slid down my cheek. What was wrong with me? Here was a great guy who I loved more than my life ready to marry me and I couldn't make myself accept his proposal. And I had no idea why. All I did know was that I loved being held by him and feeling the security he gave me which I used to get from my powers, but I always had the feeling that I could get closer and more intimate with him. There was always something unknown stopping me.
I reached up and brushed my tear off my cheek, but instead of putting my hand back down, I reached up and touched his face tenderly with my wet fingers. His skin and my skin, it felt so good, and I closed my eyes, giving into my feelings. I moved my fingers across his cheek and ran them through his hair. I was so close, yet so far from him.
"Don't worry about my love," I whispered to him. "I still love-"
Abruptly my hand jerked hitting his head, and instinctively he snapped his head back.
"Did you just hit me?" he asked, stunned. My eyes weren't open yet, but I could feel his stare on me. I heard him gasp.
My hand, my arm was trembling. I could feel the sensation rise from my fingertips and run like a great wave down my arm. With a great jolt, my chest convulsed and suddenly, my whole body was shaking. I collapsed into Jesse's body and I felt his strong arms pull around me, keeping me upright even though I knew my legs were shaking too much to support me.
"Adam I think Emma's having a seizure!" Jesse shouted into his comm.-ring. "What should I do?"
"Can you bring her to the lab?" Adam asked urgently, but with his calm voice trying to keep Jesse from panicking.
"I can try." My eyes still closed, I felt Jesse reach an arm under my knees and hoist me up. But I was shaking too hard and Jesse was too unsteady. Before he fell he half threw and half placed me onto our bed.
"What's going on?" Brennan asked, running in. I guess he heard the shouting from his room.
"I don't know," Jesse shouted panicked and scared. "She's shaking too badly and I can't get her to the lab."
"Let me try," Brennan said, running to me. I felt his arms around me and I was lifted up. I felt like I had no control and no strength, but opened my eyes to see Brennan's face. He was running me as fast as he could without dropping me to Adam's lab, I assumed. He looked so scared and worried. I hardly ever saw him like that.
I faded into unconsciousness, but was brought back by my sudden drop onto a cold metal table. People were shouting around me, but their voices were blurred. I stared up at the ceiling in shock. What was happening to me? Was I going to die? I was going to get married to Jesse- I couldn't die yet! My mind raced.
Adam finally appeared over me and held my arm down while he tried as painlessly as possible to slide a needle into my arm. But my muscles were drawn so tight I felt as though I had been stabbed. The burning at the entry point quickly spread throughout my whole body and I felt like I was on fire. I clenched my fists in pain, determined not to cry out.
Finally, like a cold release, I shuddered and my body relaxed. I had never felt so good. Blessed cold.
"Are you okay?" Jesse asked, stroking my hair back from my sweat soaked face.
"I've felt better," I mumbled. Adam had put me in soft restraints so that I wouldn't fall off the bed and I weakly struggled against them. Jesse lovingly held my hand while carefully taking them off.
Shalimar joined Jesse above me. "Hey Em," was all she could think of to say. I loved her for it; she made me feel like were were picking up a conversation at breakfast or something, not waiting for Adam's sure-to-be grim report.
I closed my eyes to blink, but I was so tired, I couldn't lift them back up all the way.
"I love you," Jesse whispered to me, then he kissed me on the forehead. It was the last thing I heard before I drifted off to sleep.
We stayed like that for a long time, him on the ground holding out a ring to me, standing up, our eyes locked, his daring mine to open up.
"Why not?" he asked, dropping his hands and standing up so we were level. It was so characteristic of him to analyze everything and then try to fix it.
I stared at him a long time. He looked hurt, but for the moment he had put his hurt aside to quench his insatiable curiosity. I offered him a weak smile which didn't reassure him.
"It's not you," I stammered, not knowing what was wrong with me.
"It's not about what happened last year, is it?" he asked.
"I don't know," I told him. He looked into my shielded eyes and put the velvet cased ring in his pocket. Then he placed his hands securely on my hips.
A small tear slid down my cheek. What was wrong with me? Here was a great guy who I loved more than my life ready to marry me and I couldn't make myself accept his proposal. And I had no idea why. All I did know was that I loved being held by him and feeling the security he gave me which I used to get from my powers, but I always had the feeling that I could get closer and more intimate with him. There was always something unknown stopping me.
I reached up and brushed my tear off my cheek, but instead of putting my hand back down, I reached up and touched his face tenderly with my wet fingers. His skin and my skin, it felt so good, and I closed my eyes, giving into my feelings. I moved my fingers across his cheek and ran them through his hair. I was so close, yet so far from him.
"Don't worry about my love," I whispered to him. "I still love-"
Abruptly my hand jerked hitting his head, and instinctively he snapped his head back.
"Did you just hit me?" he asked, stunned. My eyes weren't open yet, but I could feel his stare on me. I heard him gasp.
My hand, my arm was trembling. I could feel the sensation rise from my fingertips and run like a great wave down my arm. With a great jolt, my chest convulsed and suddenly, my whole body was shaking. I collapsed into Jesse's body and I felt his strong arms pull around me, keeping me upright even though I knew my legs were shaking too much to support me.
"Adam I think Emma's having a seizure!" Jesse shouted into his comm.-ring. "What should I do?"
"Can you bring her to the lab?" Adam asked urgently, but with his calm voice trying to keep Jesse from panicking.
"I can try." My eyes still closed, I felt Jesse reach an arm under my knees and hoist me up. But I was shaking too hard and Jesse was too unsteady. Before he fell he half threw and half placed me onto our bed.
"What's going on?" Brennan asked, running in. I guess he heard the shouting from his room.
"I don't know," Jesse shouted panicked and scared. "She's shaking too badly and I can't get her to the lab."
"Let me try," Brennan said, running to me. I felt his arms around me and I was lifted up. I felt like I had no control and no strength, but opened my eyes to see Brennan's face. He was running me as fast as he could without dropping me to Adam's lab, I assumed. He looked so scared and worried. I hardly ever saw him like that.
I faded into unconsciousness, but was brought back by my sudden drop onto a cold metal table. People were shouting around me, but their voices were blurred. I stared up at the ceiling in shock. What was happening to me? Was I going to die? I was going to get married to Jesse- I couldn't die yet! My mind raced.
Adam finally appeared over me and held my arm down while he tried as painlessly as possible to slide a needle into my arm. But my muscles were drawn so tight I felt as though I had been stabbed. The burning at the entry point quickly spread throughout my whole body and I felt like I was on fire. I clenched my fists in pain, determined not to cry out.
Finally, like a cold release, I shuddered and my body relaxed. I had never felt so good. Blessed cold.
"Are you okay?" Jesse asked, stroking my hair back from my sweat soaked face.
"I've felt better," I mumbled. Adam had put me in soft restraints so that I wouldn't fall off the bed and I weakly struggled against them. Jesse lovingly held my hand while carefully taking them off.
Shalimar joined Jesse above me. "Hey Em," was all she could think of to say. I loved her for it; she made me feel like were were picking up a conversation at breakfast or something, not waiting for Adam's sure-to-be grim report.
I closed my eyes to blink, but I was so tired, I couldn't lift them back up all the way.
"I love you," Jesse whispered to me, then he kissed me on the forehead. It was the last thing I heard before I drifted off to sleep.