"Feeling a little nervous there Bren?" Brandon asked teasingly.

"Just a little. Besides" she countered. "I don't see you rushing to check your grades."

Brandon lounging against the wall, laughed nervously in a vain attempt to hide his own anxiety "Well you see that's because I'm being polite, but if you wanted me to go first all you had to do was say so." He took a step forward purposefully.

"No." Brenda said quickly. She didn't want to prolong the agony; she'd rather just get it over with. Back in December when she'd taken her finals, she'd actually felt pretty good about them, but now in the harsh light of January, with the results there in black and white, she wasn't so sure. Once she read the results there was no going back, and painful as her current state of not knowing was, the knowing could be infinitely worse.

She took a deep breath and turned back to the board. As a rule she preferred to confront her fears head on, and this time was no different. Heart hammering, she ran her finger down the list until she found her own name. She hesitated for a moment, gathering her courage, and then reluctantly traced her finger across to find the grades. She blinked in surprise, and then looked again, and then a third time just to be sure. A feeling of joy bubbled up inside her, and a broad smile broke out on her face, she had done better than she had even dared to hope.

"Congratulations Bren." Brandon applauded, peering over her shoulder and squinting at the list.

"Congratulations yourself" Brenda beamed, stabbing at his results with her finger.

Brandon's face relaxed in to a smile. He hadn't wanted to admit it, but he'd been more than a little worried about his grades. The finals had been pretty challenging, and he hadn't felt as prepared as he would have liked. He'd done his best with the hours he'd had available, but his job at the Peach Pit had really eaten in to his study time. Seeing the results, he felt like a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

"How'd you do bro?" he asked Steve, who was now studying the list intently.

Steve glanced up, eyes sparkling in barely concealed delight "Let's just say I don't think I have a D+ average anymore. I figure I'm up to at least a B-." He treated Brandon to a self-satisfied smile "Looks like college is in my future after all"

"Hey that's great man!" Brandon exclaimed clapping Steve on the back. "See I told you all you needed was a little time with the books."

"Yeah well looks like you were right for once Walsh, just don't let it go to your head." Steve pushed all thoughts of the legacy key to the back of his mind. It had been touch and go there for a while. There had been plenty of rumour and speculation, but the Brenda-Dylan-Kelly revelations had made the school break in yesterday's news. Mrs Teasely hadn't taken it any further, and even Andrea Zuckerman seemed to have dropped it now. Everything was cool; he was home free. He could put it all behind him, and concentrate on his future, his college future.

Brandon laughed and punched Steve good-naturedly on the arm "Well since you've caught the studying bug, how about we start the semester as we mean to go on and get to class on time."

Steve pulled a face "Did you have to mention classes, I was just starting to enjoy myself".

Brandon shook his head in mock disapproval "Now Steve is that really the right attitude for your senior year. Hey Bren can you imagine what this man is gonna be like when he gets to College, he'll never make it to class!"

Brenda didn't answer; she hadn't even heard Brandon. She was still staring at the list. She didn't wanna know, it wasn't really any concern of hers any more. What did it matter to her anyway? Maybe it was just force of habit that was making her do this, a conditioned response after so many years of caring. It was a compulsion; she couldn't help herself, just like she couldn't help still reading his horoscope in the newspaper everyday. Stupid, it was stupid, she was stupid, after everything he had done why should she care? She didn't want to care.

Without her permission her eyes settled on Dylan's name, automatically her fingers traced across to find his grades.

"Hmmm not bad, but not quite up to his usual high standard" Brandon commented quietly from behind her.

"Yeah well I guess he had other things to do than study." Brenda said bitterly, blinking back the tears that suddenly threatened. She'd thought she'd gotten past this bursting in to tears at the mention of his name or the sight of his Porsche in the parking lot; guess she'd been wrong. She knew she was being totally irrational; she didn't even know why this was getting her so upset.

"I'm sorry Bren" Brandon said softly, his eyes full of concern at her obvious distress. "I know this is hard, but I'm really proud of the way you've been coping with it". He gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze "I know you can get through this".

She sighed. "I don't know Brandon, I thought I could, but that was before, it's different now."

"Why?" Brandon asked in confusion. The way he had it figured, it could only get easier with time.

"Because I didn't have to see them during the vacation" she explained. "But now we're back at school…" She didn't finish the sentence; she didn't need to.

"Okay" Brandon acknowledged "But we talked about this, you said it yourself, the way to get through this is to focus on the positive things in your life." He smiled faintly. "Face it Bren, it's time to look on the bright side."

"The bright side?" Brenda asked incredulously, her brother was an eternal optimist; it was part of his charm she guessed. "How do you even know there is a bright side Brandon?"

Brandon thought carefully. She'd made huge strides forward over the last week or so, and he couldn't bear to see her slip back in to the black depression that had consumed her for so long. Right now she seemed to be teetering on the brink of coping or not coping. He had to do everything he could to help her get through this, and right now that meant giving her something positive to focus on. "Well let's start with your grades here." He said confidently. "Bren, these grades give you a shot at getting in to a great College."

"Okay, I get that" she said slowly. "But how does that make up for losing Dylan?"

Brandon sighed "I guess what I'm saying Bren is that this isn't about Dylan anymore, it's about you." He hesitated at her puzzled frown, realising that he wasn't making himself clear. He thought for a moment and then tried again "Look this is our senior year of high school. It's not a time for thinking about the past; it's a time for looking to the future." He shrugged. "We're all moving on Bren, who knows where we're gonna be or who we're gonna be with next year." He smiled "There's a whole heap of people out there that you're gonna meet, and a whole lot of new experiences waiting for you. These grades are your ticket Bren, your ticket to a whole new adventure." He turned to Steve. "Steve back me up on this one would ya."

Steve grinned. "Oh you're right man, you're absolutely right." He draped an arm around Brenda's shoulder and whispered conspiratorially "I can see endless possibilities. Trust me you're gonna love it. I mean college, what's not to love?"

Brenda raised a wry smile. They were right of course. A few months ago she had thought exactly the same way. She had been so thrilled at the prospect of going away to school. The idea of setting out in to the unknown, seeing new places and meeting new people had really gotten her fired up. She was standing on the threshold of perhaps the most exciting moment in her life; her future lay before her waiting to be discovered. She could pretty much go anywhere and do anything. She just wished she could feel more excited about it.

Part of her couldn't wait to get out, to run away from her problems just as she had done in Paris this summer. She almost wished she could fast forward to the end of the semester without having to live through the next few months, to put an end to this phase of her life, and make a new start some place else. But another part of her was loathe to leave the familiarity of her life in Beverly Hills, to leave her friends, her family, and she admitted reluctantly to leave Dylan.

Over the last few days she'd begun to ask herself if she could ever forgive him, if she could ever take him back. She'd forgiven him in the past, taken him back no matter what he had done. Sometimes in her weaker moments she imagined the two of them happy and back together, then she remembered what he had done to her and how much it had hurt, and she resolved never to have anything to do with him again. A few hours later she was back to imagining the two of them together. It was driving her crazy.

Eventually she had realised that it didn't matter, because Dylan didn't want to come back. Why? It was a question she'd been asking herself a lot lately. Why had Dylan stopped loving her? Why had he cheated on her? Why had Kelly betrayed her? Why had all this happened? That was the hardest part about it all, not knowing why.

She'd gone over and over it in her head, endlessly analysing the situation, trying to understand it. She'd plagued her family and friends with questions, hoping that one of them would be able to shed light on what had happened. The trouble was there were a million different answers, endless interpretations. The only people who could tell her the truth were Dylan and Kelly, and how could she ever believe anything that either of them said? She knew deep down that it didn't really matter, it had happened, and no amount of analysing or discussing could ever change that, yet she couldn't help it. Until she had an explanation, how could she ever accept it and move on?

Sighing heavily, she felt around in her pocket until her fingers closed around the little velvet box. She didn't want to wear it, it wouldn't feel right, not after what had happened, but she just couldn't bring herself to throw it away. She frowned. What did it mean? Why had he given it to her? Was this a sign that he wanted to remove all trace of her from his life, or was it his way of telling her that no matter what had happened he still cared? Despite everything, a part of her needed to believe that he did.

"So?" Brandon asked interrupting her thoughts. "Have you seen enough here, are you ready to go?" Steve nodded and began to move off down the hallway.

"Just a minute." Brenda called, recovering her composure. "I wanna see how Donna and David did." Brandon turned back, joined her at the board. Brenda smiled in delight. Donna and David had done just fine, better than fine in fact. It looked like all David's hard work had paid off after all. She sighed. At least that particular couple had a shot at making it past high school.

"Looking good." Brandon nodded his approval "Andrea too." He smiled. "Like there was ever any doubt". There was more chance of snow in Beverly Hills than there was of Andrea Zuckerman getting lousy grades. Andrea would always be a straight A student, it was one of life's certainties.

Brenda hesitated. These last few weeks she had done everything in her power to cut Kelly out of her life, to pretend that she didn't exist. She didn't need to know Kelly's grades; it wasn't anything to do with her anymore. Part of her hoped that Kelly had done badly, retribution for all the pain she had inflicted. Seeing Kelly miserable just might make her feel better. The tiny part of her that still clung on to the threads of their friendship hoped that Kelly had done okay.

Kelly had done dreadfully. For an instant Brenda was filled with horror and sympathy, and then she remembered that Kelly wasn't her best friend any more, that she didn't care. She waited for it to make her feel better but it didn't, not really.

"I guess there's always a price to pay." Brandon observed quietly.

Brenda looked at him thoughtfully "You know Brandon you just might be right." She'd been preoccupied with finals and College, she'd neglected Dylan, and she'd paid the price. Whilst she'd had her head buried in a textbook, Kelly had stolen him away from her. Now Kelly had Dylan, but she might have blown her chances of college to get him. Brenda sighed. Her father had warned her that she might have to choose between Dylan and college. Had she made the choice without even realising it?