The morning sun streamed through the open window, and a warm breeze tugged at the pages of the magazine as Brenda Walsh flicked idly through 'The Stage'. She liked to read the magazine occasionally to keep up to date with the world of theatre. It helped her feel connected to it, served as a reminder that one day someone might be sitting in this very same library reading a review of one of her performances. When she read it, she could almost imagine that she was already there, that she was a famous actress and not a high school senior. Every now and then she broke off from her reading and surveyed her surroundings, enjoying the sensation of the sun on her face and the warm breeze that ruffled her hair.
The old library was empty save for herself and the on duty librarian, not surprising considering it was a Saturday morning. Most people her age were out enjoying the spring sunshine, or sleeping in, or shopping at the mall, but right now Brenda didn't feel like most people her age. She felt older, weighed down by the seriousness of the decision that she had to make.
She had to decide what she was gonna do next year, and she knew that she wouldn't be able to rest until the dilemma had been resolved. Over the last few weeks she had become more and more certain that she needed to get away, away from Beverly Hills, away from Dylan. She'd figured on heading back to Minnesota, but something about it just didn't feel right.
The idea of stepping right back in to her old life, with her old friends sounded safe, comfortable, like slipping on a favourite sweater that had been forgotten at the back of the closet. Yet she couldn't quite shake the doubts that crept in to her mind whenever she thought about going back. She had read somewhere once that you should never go back. She couldn't even remember where she'd read it, but for some reason the sentiment had stuck.
She knew it was stupid, but she couldn't help thinking that going back to Minnesota would be a mistake, although she couldn't seem to pin down exactly why she felt that way. Still there were other places, other schools, and since Brandon was set on California University, there was money to spend on an out of state school if that was what she wanted. She frowned. Was that what she wanted? Should she just start again someplace else, where nobody knew her, where she could reinvent herself just like she had in Paris?
Irritated she shook her head trying to clear the thoughts that were clouding her mind. The problem was her feelings about college were all tied up with her feelings about Dylan and Kelly. Brandon had told her that she had to try and separate the two, but it was impossible. Dylan had always been an important consideration in her college choice, and even now he was a major factor, although not in the way in which she would have liked.
The breeze whipped around the magazine and Brenda slapped irritably at the pages that twisted in her grip like a wild animal bidding for freedom. It was only when the words became blurred and danced in front of her eyes that she realised that she was close to tears- again. Decisively she wiped her eyes, and concentrated her attention on the page in front of her. It was too nice a morning for such dismal thoughts; she hadn't intended to get so gloomy, and she'd promised herself that she wasn't gonna get upset about Dylan today.
She didn't even know what she was doing here; she'd gone out for a walk and somehow ended up outside the library. She'd been here so often these past few weeks; she guessed her feet had just taken her here on autopilot. There was something comfortingly familiar about the old library. The musty smell of the dust-covered books, some of which probably hadn't been opened in years, the peaceful serenity, the sense of history and academia. Yet today Brenda felt anxious and unsettled.
She'd always loved the library, it was her refuge, where she could lose herself in the fantastical world of literature, and for an hour or so forget all about her problems. Lately though she hadn't come here to forget, she'd come here to think. Usually flipping through the books and magazines helped her to relax, to free her mind, but today she just couldn't seem to think straight.
She checked her watch, almost 10.30am; she was supposed to be meeting Donna in a couple of hours for lunch followed by some much needed retail therapy. Brenda was amazed at how well Donna was holding up right now. The police had been investigating the case for three weeks, but they still didn't have anything concrete. She really didn't know how Donna was managing to stay cheerful throughout the whole ordeal. Brenda was doing her best to be supportive; to help take Donna's mind off her problems, but she felt pretty useless, she'd had as little success resolving Donna's problem as she had with her own.
She realised that she was too restless for the library this morning; it didn't seem to be having its usual calming effect. Perhaps what she needed was some fresh air, a walk along the beach might clear her mind, give her some perspective. Sighing heavily, she began to collect up the assortment of books and magazines that were scattered across the table in front of her. As she reached for 'The Stage', a strong gust of wind from the open window flipped the pages, propelling it off the table and on to the floor. As she bent to retrieve it, Brenda shook her head in mild amusement; even the elements seemed to be against her today.
As she placed the rogue magazine on the top of the pile she froze, her heart leaping in excitement. How could she have missed this before? It was perfect, exactly what she was looking for, and there were still two weeks to go, plenty of time if she started now. Already she could feel excitement, and a little fear bubbling up inside her. This was it, the solution to her dilemma, and it had been right in front of her this whole time. Determinedly she picked up the magazine and headed for the librarian's desk. Borrowing pencil and paper she carefully copied down the details. When she left the library a few minutes later it was with a new sense of purpose, and the hint of a smile on her face.
***
"How could you?" David Silver demanded angrily, slamming the newspaper down on the desk in front of Brandon. Reluctantly Brandon raised his head, and slowly he met David's eyes, wincing at the obvious hurt in David's expression. He'd known this was coming, had been waiting for David to confront him ever since 'The Blaze' hit the streets this morning. Now that it was happening he was actually kind of glad that the wait was over.
Before Brandon could answer, Andrea Zuckerman intervened from her seat on the other side of the newspaper office "Look David, I'm sorry but we didn't have a choice. This story is of obvious interest to the student body, and as the school paper, 'The Blaze' has a responsibility to report the facts. She spoke calmly but firmly, her detached professionalism belaying the unease she felt inside.
"Facts! What facts?" David demanded hotly. "The police have been investigating for a month now and they haven't found anything to tie me or Donna to the break in." He stabbed his finger angrily at the paper "Thanks to this everyone's gonna think that we're guilty anyway, you might as well sign the expulsion papers yourselves."
"David no one's gonna know it's you" Brandon explained hastily. "We were careful not to name you in the piece".
"Besides" Andrea interjected. "Reawakening public interest in the case might help. Maybe someone will remember seeing or hearing something that could lead the police to the real thief."
Brandon wished he could believe that. Ever since Andrea had convinced him to run the story he had experienced misgivings. He knew that from a journalistic perspective they had done the right thing, but he couldn't help thinking that as a friend he had screwed up badly.
David shook his head in disgust "If someone was gonna remember something don't you think they'd have remembered it by now? All you've done is fuel the rumours about me and Donna, and made everything a hundred times worse."
Ignoring Brandon's pleas to sit down and talk, he picked up the paper and threw it in the trash.
"I just hope your precious story is worth it." He snarled angrily, then spun on his heel and stomped towards the door colliding with Steve who was on his way in.
"Hey David where's the fire?" Steve exclaimed as he found himself pushed roughly against the wall, but David ignored him and continued walking.
Steve turned to Brandon and Andrea for an explanation "Something I said?"
Brandon shook his head tiredly. "Don't worry about it man, it's nothing to do with you, we're the one's responsible for David's bad mood." He retrieved the copy of 'The Blaze' that David had dumped in the trash, and held it up for Steve to examine.
Steve cringed. Nothing to do with him, Brandon couldn't be more wrong. This was all down to him, and it was getting out of hand. Why hadn't he put a stop to all this when he had a chance? Why had he let it get this far? He could have stopped this before the police got involved, but he hadn't. If only he had had the guts to own up before. He should have done it as soon as he knew Silver was in the frame, but he hadn't. Typical Steve Sanders more concerned with saving his own hide than saving his friends. He'd let the police get involved, he'd let everyone believe that Donna and David were guilty when he was the one person who knew without a shadow of doubt that they were innocent.
He hated himself for what he had done, but he had backed himself in to a corner, and there was no easy way out. This had gone beyond trying to steal finals papers, now he had let his friends take the fall for something that he had done, and the way he saw it that was a much greater crime. If anyone ever found out he could say goodbye to his friends forever, he had broken their trust in the worst way. He sighed heavily. He'd pulled some dumb stunts in his time, gotten himself in to his fair share of trouble, and his friends had always forgiven him, but he didn't see any way back from this one.