All disclaimers are in place. Refer to the Prologue section for details.
A/N: Explanations to come, don't worry.
PART FIVE: SECRETSHalo blinked. Her mouth fell open. Realization and fear flooded her brain and spilled over onto her nerves as she comprehended what the Potions Master had just told her. She began to shake her head. "I don't want it."
Snape attempted to raise an eyebrow, but his tired expression couldn't manage it. Beyond being too tired to force punishment on her resistance, he resolved to allow her to choose her own fate. "I don't suppose you intend to hear me out, in which case, you may spend the evening doing exactly what I had planned for you yesterday. However, if you can behave like a normal human girl while I explain it to you, I just might permit you to get a good night's sleep tonight. What will it be?"
Halo swallowed the lump of icy rage in her throat, cemented her jaw to her top row of teeth, folded her hands in front of her and stared at him intently. I can behave, really I can… as long as I can go to bed afterward, her mind told her mouth.
Snape took in a deep breath, accepting the surrender of her attention. "I have already spoken to the Headmaster, and you will be trained. Against my better judgment, Headmaster Dumbledore wishes you to realize your full potential in hopes that the abilities you will gain may be of use in the future. But once your education is complete, whether or not you choose to use your skill will be entirely up to you."
He paused to allow her to absorb this.
Anxiety swelled in the pit of her stomach. Her first reaction was that of terror and disgust. I won't let him turn me into a monster. I'm just enough of one already, thank you very much. She swallowed hard. Besides, Sirens are dirty, deceptive killers. I may be underhanded and I'm definitely rotten, but I'm no murderer. How can they want me to become something so awful?
When it appeared that she had grasped the concept fully, or at least wasn't openly resistant, he continued.
"Before you ask, you did not receive this power as a genetic abnormality; it is completely random in each individual, but extremely rare, and only inherent in females."
So essentially, it's not my fault or the fault of my parents that I have it. Great. Like I can look to them to support me through this anyway. Unadulterated sarcasm piled on pure trepidation.
"Exactly how far you ability may extend, I cannot tell you." Snape's voice was considerably less hostile than before. "The traits are quite diverse in each case. Those who begin to display their abilities are frequently driven into exile by people who are afraid of what they do not understand and believe everything they hear, which is a considerable percent of the population. It is imperative that you remain quiet on the subject, for your own safety."
Bitterness edged into her subconscious. Since when is he concerned with my safety? Don't worry, I won't say it… but he can't stop me from thinking it. She watched his neck expand slightly as he smothered a yawn and she had to repress a snort.
Snape caught on and his eyes flashed dangerously to keep her in check. He halted the monologue just long enough for her to remember her place. Moving behind his desk, he drew out a notebook from a drawer and returned to his stool.
"The journal will tell you much of what you need to know. I don't need to inform you the consequences of it being discovered." With a twitch of his wand he transfigured the flimsy pages to a hardcover book. It read, "The Monster Book of Monsters."
How appropriate, a book no one would likely pick up.
Snape was just about out of patience. "Read the first section and I'll begin your training tomorrow evening. Now go."
Knock, knock.
"Enter." Snape's voice was edgy, and no doubt ready to strike.
Marcus Flint appeared in the doorway. "I need help with the assignment." The young man's demeanor was of a self-satisfied and very spoiled brat. He sneered at Halo.
Snape thrust the book in Halo's arms. "I'd advise you to take your questions to the appropriate teacher," he snapped at her. "Don't bother me with this again."
Halo raised an eyebrow, caught the hint and backed out of the classroom, intentionally bumping Flint into one of the desks. "Sorry," she muttered sarcastically.
Halo reached her room in record time, no mischievous side-trips taken, no vengeful cravings acted upon. She slammed the door behind her, launched herself onto her bed, bringing the journal down with her, and let out a huge sigh.
"I can't handle this right now," she said out loud.
Luna was perched on the back of a chair and clicked her beak in agreement.
And indeed she couldn't handle it, for she succumbed to sleep fully dressed in her robes and clutching the journal which rested in her hands.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
She wasn't prepared to handle it in the morning either, nor was she prepared to tell Oliver what happened, because she knew she couldn't keep it a secret from him for very long. And anything he could possibly find out could hurt and terrify him very deeply.
I'd be shocked, but it would be just like him to shrug and say, "So?" she thought as she wandered through the dungeon corridors early in the morning before anyone had awakened. But I know better. He'll probably act all nice about it, but I'll see how afraid he is. He'll do everything he can to avoid me. And being the kind of person I am, I'll let him get away with it… won't I? Inner conflict seared through her. And I can't keep it from him… he'll start to ignore me if I push him away for too long. I'm doomed to be feared and ignored either way… and will he tell everyone when he finds out? She sighed in moral defeat.
She decided to avoid him at all costs and went as far as to skip breakfast and reached the Potions classroom fifteen minutes early. She convinced one of Slytherin's Beaters, Abel Ordwin, to be her lab partner… which wasn't all too difficult considering that the great ape's comprehension level was comparable to that of a wildebeest.
"Don't think you can use my other lab partner every day, Halo," Flint said her name with disgust. You may have everyone else fooled, but I see you're nothing but a craven weakling who has nothing better to do than destroy everything in her path and rely on teachers to protect her."
He moved to face his other crony, the other Slytherin Beater, who was indicating something vulgar in another direction. He snickered and turned back to Halo, baring his obscenely crooked teeth.
"And by the way, Professor Snape won't be able to help you with your lessons anymore. He'll be too busy coaching the Slytherin Quidditch team." He said Slytherin as though Halo had no place in that particular House.
It was times like these when she had doubts about her membership in the darkest of the Hogwarts houses. It's better to be in limbo sometimes than to be the butt of critical jokes, she thought.
Oh if you only knew what I know… you wouldn't have that despicable smirk on your face, Marcus Flint. This was one time when her unrevealed ability could be used in her favor. She admitted to herself that she'd give almost anything to see terror in the brute's eyes.
The ugly Quidditch Captain's face, complete with hideously crooked teeth, was just too impossibly revolting at that moment; it was almost comical. Halo was unable to stifle a sudden giggle.
"Are you laughing at me?" he demanded.
"Oh no, I'm not laughing at you… just… near you."
The classroom door banged open then, signaling the entrance of the Potions Master. Halo remembered her place and present circumstances, and hence wiped the smile from her face.
Snape gave a little glance of approval in her direction as he took his place at the podium. He seemed to consent with a tiny air of surprise the fact that she'd apparently begun to take her place in Slytherin House, consorting with those in that house, and away from that do-gooder Gryffindor, Wood. But what he doesn't know, Halo thought deceptively, could make him very, very angry with me. Hmmm… I must find a way to use this to my advantage…
"Your Veritaserum attempts were absolutely shameful. Might I remind you that your graduation from this school depends on your performance in this class. Anyone who does not submit a working potion by the end of this session will lose more house points than their house presently possesses. Get to work." Snape swirled his cloak and went behind his desk to grade papers.
Apparently, he had sent out for potions ingredients. As Snape eyed the now bustling classroom warily, Halo dropped the truth-potion's components into the cauldron she shared with the big oaf sitting next to her and silently wished she'd been Oliver's partner. She knew he'd need more help than he was getting from his bright but unprepared Gryffindor lab partner.
She glanced back to look at him, busily and rather nervously emptying bottles into his mixture. I'm so sorry, Oliver, she willed to him.
Fortunately by the end of class, most of the teams had produced working serums and Gryffindor House was only deficient of thirty points. Slytherin, however, had earned themselves fifty, not surprisingly, and Snape looked quite pleased with himself as the students packed up their books.
Halo was first out the classroom door, hoping to escape to her next class before Oliver could catch up.
No such luck.
"Halo, wait up!" Oliver reached her side, panting slightly.
"Aaargh!" she groaned, angry that he had caught up with her, and anxious that he would press her for more information than she was willing to give.
Oliver's hands went up in front of him in defensive surrender. "Whoa, I just wanted to see if you were all right, maybe find out how last night went, that's all."
"Please don't ask me to tell you anything right now," Halo begged, continuing up the stairs, her books clutched to her chest.
"Why not? You look like someone beat you with a stick. Please tell me what happened." He got in front of her, forcing her to stop in front of him. She didn't look up.
"Oliver, I'm going to tell you this just once… I don't want to talk about it right now."
"Don't want to talk about what?" he prodded, trying to trick her into spilling. It was one of the few ways he knew of to get her to open up to him.
"Nothing… just… it's nothing."
"Well if that's all, do you want to come watch Quidditch practice tonight? We could use all the cheerleaders we can get…"
How dare he turn this from me to him! she thought loudly, the silent words echoing through her head. Before she could regain control, she let some spill.
"Look, I discovered something about myself that would scare you so badly you'd probably keel over where you stand. Go find another friend, someone who will tell you everything you want to hear." When the last part had fully come out she was sorry she'd said it.
"No, Halo. I am your friend. And I don't see how anything you would tell me could possibly scare me away. And I don't just want you to tell me what I want to hear, I want the truth… because I want to help you." His eyes searched her face for any form of resignation, any wavering of the impenetrable wall she'd erected around herself.
Halo turned her sad eyes up to him, disbelief washing over her. He really was a true friend. "Then leave me be. I… I'll tell you when I am ready."
She pushed past him and went up the stairs.
Oliver let his head drop in acceptance. She really was a tough one. But he liked her, that's what mattered to him. And he felt he'd do anything to help her see that.