I Will Always Love You…
/I deserve this…/
Peeling back one of his satiny sleeves, Yami revealed the frail flesh that was hidden underneath. Chalky and slightly gray in appearance, his skin resembled the deteriorating corpses found in a morgue. He was a walking zombie, not just in physical terms, but in the mental fashion, too. Painfully thin and deathly frightening on the outside, suffering from memory lapses and emotional trauma and drama on the inside. It was too much to take--entirely too much to stomach by himself. If only his gentle, fun-loving hikari were sitting beside him right now, holding him, hugging him, whispering sweet nothings in his ear that everything would work out eventually--
/because I hurt him. /
But things wouldn't magically fall back into place now. The pieces of his sennen puzzle-like heart had been shattered, the golden shards scattered throughout the depths of the icy abyss he knew his soul to be. His spirit had to be that dark, that callous and cruel, to destroy the beautiful relationship he tried so desperately to hold onto.
/I devastated him. /
His amethyst orbs stared out into the emptiness of the bedroom, completely expressionless as they shifted their gaze from one object to another, items that spelled out the pending demise of a couple that claimed that God Himself could not tear them apart. Briefly glancing at the image standing on its own on the dresser, the wild events of the day invaded his mind, interrupting his already terrible breathing cycle. Small, cherub-like fingers brushing over the photograph, a cheerless smile that longed for dreams that could never come true, large, purple orbs swimming in terrifying sorrow…they were visions of reality in all of its horrifying glory, sequences in the past which had just occurred in a matter of minutes, but felt like they had erupted lifetimes ago. Time had literally lost all meaning for the millennium spirit, for he had merely succumbed to the morose maelstrom of shadows and rain just to belong somewhere. Yugi cast him out of the warmth and security of his embrace, leaving him to wander the landscape of his private chambers.
/He has no place for me in his heart anymore. /
That was a realm far more dangerous than the gloomy alleyways veering off into select, dilapidated cities. Loneliness and isolation ran rampant through the corridors of his head, dominating his actions, controlling the aspects of his entire being. And it wounded him--totally frightened him--that he'd have to revert back to the same bleak individual he was before he had ever met his significant other…
/Stop kidding yourself. I'm as terrible as I always was--/
Lifting a shaky hand to his arm, he settled the limb on the nearly transparent covering that was stretched over his bones. He winced at the amount of pressure that was being applied to his arm, not even truly understanding how much he had severely damaged his body. All he was capable of comprehending was the anguish he had contaminated his partnership with, absolutely loathing how much of an infectious little parasite his misery grew to be. This self-hatred would never end. It would never cease to twist his dreams into nightmares, destroy his conscience, or wreak havoc on his pain strained soul. It was always there, the tears, the desolation, the horrible feeling of crazy sadness that would one day consume him whole…maybe even on a day like this, where there was no hope of recovery.
/I'm as terrible as I always will be. /
Without warning, he tensed his fingers and dragged them down his arm; cutting into the soft reserve of tissue he had left. A thick, sticky substance streaked its way down his skin, forming its own identifiable river that flowed onto his legs. Disregarding the unidentified fluid, Pharaoh struck himself again, ripping open the base of his wrist with crimson covered claws. Strangely enough, the throbbing of his shredded skin didn't register in his brain. He was trapped within the hallways of his head, stepping off into oblivion, deviating from the plane of materialism to fall victim to silence. Ever-lasting quietness. A dimension where no one could hear him scream, wipe his tears from his visage, or smell the disgusting stench of the liquid dripping from his veins. Not a single soul would be subjected to his vile capacity to make loved ones abhor him, nor would they be forced to endure such a sick sight. Now everyone, even his hikari, could sleep better tonight…because he would see to it that he didn't plague the dreams of the innocent anymore.
/Die…/
Empty amethyst orbs gazed into the darkness of space, seeing only the endless boundaries of eternity. Normally, twinkling stars dazzled the nether regions of the cosmos, but not today. Not in this dispirited individual's mind. Like everything, there was a time and place for the childish accents life had to offer-- flower petals in the wind, the sparkle of an angel's wings, shared lollipops and milkshakes in a diner--but this wasn't one of them. Those candy fantasy wishes had perished when the petite schoolboy had walked out of the living quarters, taking every hope, dream, and promise made to Yami with him. Those happily created wishes were like a star, a glittering shooting star that lit up Pharaoh's eyes one second, then left as abruptly as it had appeared. No more, now. No more faith, no trust, not even a tiny ray of hope sparkled in his dull purple orbs. He was as dead as the crystal chasm he imagined, the vast void of blackness so thick with despair and remorse that it swallowed him completely. There, he would bounce from one desolate desert to another, exploring the dunes of infinity for what he lacked so greatly, but could never seem to hold onto…
/Just die already. Drop dead so no one has to put up with me anymore. Exterminate this existence so I can forget that I ever came onto this earth and fell in love…/
While ripping at the length of his arm, the gothic-haired male felt his lids began to flutter. His sight opened woozily one moment, then closed the next, resembling what electricity displays during a power outage. At last, obscure darkness was blinding his vision; the electrician inside his head was executing the final actions in shutting his system down. Positioning his hand over the discolored flesh once more, he set his nails on top of the gash, felt the slippery runnel of red beneath his fingertips, and paused temporarily. This should have been one of those scenarios where the dying individual starts to see their life flash before their eyes, but this wasn't the case for the king of the Nile. Instead of viewing the most important instances that transpired in his existence, his mind registered the mental picture of a charming little child, treading across the white shores of a beach while holding his hand. Showing him a smile that would make a devil convert to sainthood, the teenage angel glowed with a radiance that rivaled the moon's splendor. Allowing his lids to slowly shut, the petite adolescent took his lover's face into his hands, tenderly stroking the fine details of his boyfriend's visage. Then, just as the sun began to set, he inched up onto his toes, drew close to his soul mate, and--
/The clock struck midnight, and Cinderella vanished from my sight…/
Breathing in one final laborious breath, Prince Charming toppled over, slapping his delicate head against the floor. Once again, he was the nameless nobleman who had lived thousands of years ago, thrust back into the kingdom of gods and pharaohs to slumber in the shady sarcophagus of perpetuity. His trembling fist, the same one that had raked deep into his skin, could finally stretch out and relax. There, lying in the palm of his freshly opened hand, lay two engagement rings. Both glassy objects were a symbol of the fairytale-like romance that had existed before time; a stunning bond that came into effect with love at first sight, but tragically disappeared once the spell of affection wore off. But no matter how long he had condemned himself to wander under the Sahara sun, the mysterious soul known as Yami would never go a day without thinking about his one and only love, the desert rose who had sprang up out of his gardens of sand just to show him the importance of cherishing and treasuring the joys of friendship. Those vows of intimacy would always be with him, playing like a child in his heart, whispering to him some sweet, wonderful secret that he promised to share with whomever he came across.
"Want to now what the secret is?" the gothic-haired individual asked the possessions in his residence, barely able to feel his lips move anymore. "You have to promise to pass it along once I tell you--"
Even though his voice gave out, the Egyptian still mouthed the words that Yugi had whispered to him that fabled day by the sea.
/Even as I draw my last sigh, when it's time to say good-bye, and my existence on this plane draws nigh…I will always love you…/