Mulder watched her tell the story her face more animated then he had ever seen it as she went through all the emotions. She smiled through it all and he knew she was laughing at it now but the terror was so real for her then.
"I just made it over the fence when something grabbed me and I passed out."
"What happened? Who grabbed you?" he asked eagerly. He had been hanging on her every word, enjoying the shine in her eyes and the curve on her lips.
"It was my father."
Mulder frowned confused at the ending he hadn't expected.
"Bill told him where I'd gone and he came after me. Got a chopper up to search the forest and sent a team to search the opposite side."
"Your father? What about the ghost?" he asked.
"Well I can only put it down to childish fears and willing something to be there that was never there."
"You imagined it?" he said unconvinced. He'd heard the tremor in her voice and saw the spark behind her deep blue eyes. He didn't believe her and he knew she didn't either. Her eyes avoided him as she took another drink from her water.
"I was eleven, in a dark forest searching for a ghost. I was going to see something whether it was there or not."
"Scully, you're such a tease."
"What do you mean?" she asked facing him for the first time since she finished her tale.
"You lured me in and got me all excited with the premise of a ghost story but then you give me nothing."
"I said I thought I saw a ghost once. I never promised you tales of untold horror."
"Well it was implied," he said smiling as he resettled himself in the seat and reached for some seeds.
"Or maybe you picked up an inference that was never there," she said finally.
He cast a sideways glance and caught her looking back unashamedly watching him.
"I really did think I saw a ghost," she said quietly and he looked at her fully. "It really scared me, I couldn't sleep for ages and I wouldn't go near that forest again."
"Amazing how a childhood memory can affect us even now," he said before he realise the weight his comment held. They shared a secret smile and both of them turned away into the night to let the silent tension settle.
"Your turn," she said eventually not wanting him to loll too long in his own thoughts.
"What?"
"What scared you when you were a kid?"
"You're kidding right?"
"Sorry Mulder I didn't mean…"
A thick silence fell between them and Scully cursed her insensitivity. She knew what scared him as a kid. It was the same thing that scared him right now. The same thing that kept sleep out of his reach and disturbed him in more ways than she could ever know. Mulder looked out of the rain-covered window up to the apartment they were watching. He knew she was feeling uncomfortable in their silence but his thoughts had been lingering so much on Samantha that there was little he could say. He knew what scared him and so did she.
"I was afraid of being alone and helpless," he whispered into the tension that was settling between them.
She didn't reply. He didn't expect her to. Looking around he found her watching him again her eyes wide and blue as if she was afraid of what he might say.
"I wasn't afraid of the dark, or monsters…maybe I should have been," he said with a self-derisive laugh that shook her to the core.
Tentatively she reached over and touched his arm. She could feel the heat emanating from him even through his cotton jumper.
"I'm sorry Mulder, I shouldn't have asked."
"It's okay Scully," he said covering her hand with his own trapping her slender fingers against his arm. He watched her for a moment battle with her thoughts and smiled warmly at her. "When I was young…about fifteen I was going through some rough stuff."
She didn't speak not wanting to dispel the mood he was trying to create. His eyes had glazed over and his hand travelled with hers down the length of his arm where he interlocked their fingers.
"I threw myself into my studies and little else mattered to me. I spent most of my time in the library studying reading writing anything but go home to my parents. They were at their we're fighting and gone past pretending stage so it wasn't exactly pleasant."
"Mulder, you don't have to talk about this if you don't want to," she offered hoping he wouldn't feel obliged to tell her stuff he wanted to keep secret.
"Scully you're my best friend and the only person I trust in the world."
He looked up from their mingling fingers and watched a faint blush cross her face. Smiling tenderly he captured her blue eyes and emptied all he could into them, letting her know exactly how much he trusted her and valued their relationship.
"If I can't talk to you about this stuff, who can I talk to?" he said.
"Your fish?" she joked tearing her eyes away from him before she saw too much or showed him all she had to offer.
"I think that's why they keep dying on me," he retorted.
"I'm glad you can talk to me. I like it," she admitted plainly.
"I like it too."
Their eyes locked and for a moment they each froze, caught in their own thoughts their own feelings and fantasies but fissure of reality broke through with a flash of lightning, as the rain got heavier.
"Bad night for a stakeout," she said glancing away and looking out the window still aware of their joined fingers.
"Yeah perfect night for an open fire and some ghost stories."
"You got any?"
"One or two…very scary though."
"I think I can handle it," she said looking back to him and settling into the chair.
"Okay, but don't say I didn't warned you."
"Mulder, you always warn me," she quipped confusing him with a twitch in her eyebrow and his mind racked for a double meaning.
"Okay Scully, you asked for it."
**Strange format I know but stick with it…I think it will all work out in the end…I HOPE!**