Title: Best of Intentions
Author: Luisa
Email: leyjd@hotmail.com
Pairing: B/G and a teeny bit of B/S, X/A
Rating: PG-13 (language)
Distribution: Dword, Kattie. Dee, Gabi and TL, if you want it. Any one
else - just let me know where.
Disclaimer, notes, thanks and dedications as per the prologue
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ Part 1 ~
"Look Xand, we can't just blame Willow. I know she has a problem... but you're wrong. What she needs is help, not desertion."
Xander looked at Buffy with wide eyes, disbelief evident in his expression. The two along with Anya were in the Magic Box alone, sat at the reading table processing Willow's behaviour... and the evening's events. They could only guess where everyone else was; Willow and Dawn both were (they assumed) at home, trying to persuade Tara not to leave, Giles was on his way to the Airport and Spike... well, nobody cared where Spike was.
Xander again tried to emphasise his point, wondering for the umpteenth time if he should just record it and play it over, considering the number of times he'd tried to bring reason into this conversation and been ignored. "What? Buff... it's not as simple as that. Will's just not the type to admit to that sort of thing. You know... I think Tara's got the right idea. Willow needs to know that what she's done is wrong - and the only way she can learn that is through... you know. But if we get all, "Oh well, we still love you and if you say sorry, we'll forgive you" with her, then she'll just do it again."
Buffy clenched her teeth together and balled her hands into tiny fists under the table, trying to keep her anger in check at the memories that were threatening to invade her already stressed out mind. "Xander! I can't believe you just said that. I think having your lover leave you is enough punishment for anyone, regardless of the circumstances."
Again Xander stared at Buffy as if she had grown another head. Before he could reply however, Anya offered her opinion.
"Look as an ex-vengeance demon, you know I've got plenty of experience with magic and punishment. Like, this time when this young girl's lover had been using magic to hypnotise her into having sex when she didn't want it. He stupidly left instructions for a friend lying around and she found them. Of course, she tried to leave him, but he only continually magicked her back to him so that he could perform his little hypnosis ritual again. Naturally, I responded to her pain and cursed the bastard for her. To start with I shrank his penis to the size of a chipolata, and then I..."
"An, honey, is there a point in there somewhere?" Xander hurriedly intercepted his Fiancée before the tale could get as gruesome as they usually did. She huffed slightly in response, but continued.
"It's just that if I've learned anything over the last thousand or so years, it's that love and loss go hand in hand, just as magic and its' consequences. Even despite all the grotesque and painful diseases I inflicted on this stupid boy, her leaving him was the one thing that he truly suffered and it taught him the lessons he needed to learn better than anything I could have done to him." She shrank back slightly, thinking that Xander would start criticizing her for talking about her former employment again. Instead, he stared at her in shock, his mouth hanging open.
Buffy smiled slightly at his reaction to Anya's insight, not at all surprised herself. "Mouths look better closed, Xand."
He at last found his voice. "Huh? Oh... right."
"And anyway, Xander" Buffy added. "Aren't you forgetting everything Angel did? You never used to forget. In fact your sole purpose in life for a while seemed to be tormenting me with that reminder - especially when he came back."
Xander hung his head and winced slightly at the memory. "Yeah, okay. But that's dealt with... isn't it? And what's that got to do with Willow, anyway?"
"Everything that Angel... Angelus... did to you and to Giles and to everyone was because of me. You're always making it seem like it was all Angel's fault 'cause he was this big, bad vampire. But ultimately, I was the one who slept with him. I shirked my responsibilities..." she paused for a moment, allowing a brief - albeit painful - smile to cross her lips at such a typical 'Giles' word, before continuing, "... for one careless moment and look what happened. So *I* was responsible for the consequences. But *he left me*. God knows the torture I went through after he left... it hurt so much Xand. It *was* my punishment for everything. You guys were the ones who helped: you didn't judge me or blame me. I think Willow deserves the same respect. After all, Angelus went on this big torture and killing spree - which you guys should have hated me for. In comparison, Willow's magic doesn't come anywhere near as bad... after all, she only altered our memories a little."
"Yeah, but she coulda gotten us killed..." Xander's voice trailed off as he realised what Buffy would say to his outburst. Surprisingly, it was Anya who spoke up again, placing a hand gently on one of Xanders in consolation of the fact that he was fighting a losing battle.
"And she might do it again, if we're not careful. I mean, I'm pretty sure that she won't even if it's just to get Tara back, but we can't be sure. Willow is... very powerful, and it's going to be hard to keep a control over all that power. She's really going to need us around to help and support her. Besides, how can you know that we'd have died? I mean from what I've heard, you were pretty cool dusting that vamp before... and after Buffy realised she had the strength and ability to fight and win, I think we could have gone on as before. Well, maybe not exactly as before, but still... I mean you can change someone's name... change their circumstances, but that doesn't change who they are. Fate has decided that for us anyway, and just because our perception of ourselves may change, what's inside doesn't. So, I don't think we were ever in that much danger... well, except from when the store was invaded with bunnies."
Again Xander gaped at his Fianceé, and once more it was up to Buffy to bridge the silence.
"Come on, Xand. You've got to admit she's right."
"Uh, huh." Still unable to form proper words, he just made odd little vowel sounds and nodded his head slightly as if on a string.
Anya, pleased that she had done something right for a change, patted his hand comfortingly, adding as an afterthought, "It's just a shame that the spell ended when it did, if it had lasted just a few hours longer then Giles would... well, he'd still be here and he'd probably miss his plane... I wonder if he's as good as Xander at giving orgasms?"
That comment snapped Xander out of his stupor. "Why would you wonder that? Actually, I don't think I want to know. Um... Food! Yes, food seems a good idea right now. Anyone for Chinese? I think I'll be getting some. Yes, going *now*." He stumbled slightly as he babbled, but managed to make his way to the door. "An, you coming?"
"Almost... " She replied distractedly, still daydreaming about Giles' kiss. Suddenly realising what she had said, she hastily added, "I've got to look after my horny... I mean my money... I mean..." the sentence died as she realised Xander had gone. [Great. Now he's mad at me. Oh well... I guess if I give him plenty of orgasms he'll forgive me.] She looked back at Buffy to see her reaction.
Buffy had been watching the exchange with an expression halfway between shock and amusement. The amusement gave way to shock when Anya spoke again.
"So, Buffy, now that we're alone... tell me, is Giles good at giving orgasms?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ Part 1 ~
"Look Xand, we can't just blame Willow. I know she has a problem... but you're wrong. What she needs is help, not desertion."
Xander looked at Buffy with wide eyes, disbelief evident in his expression. The two along with Anya were in the Magic Box alone, sat at the reading table processing Willow's behaviour... and the evening's events. They could only guess where everyone else was; Willow and Dawn both were (they assumed) at home, trying to persuade Tara not to leave, Giles was on his way to the Airport and Spike... well, nobody cared where Spike was.
Xander again tried to emphasise his point, wondering for the umpteenth time if he should just record it and play it over, considering the number of times he'd tried to bring reason into this conversation and been ignored. "What? Buff... it's not as simple as that. Will's just not the type to admit to that sort of thing. You know... I think Tara's got the right idea. Willow needs to know that what she's done is wrong - and the only way she can learn that is through... you know. But if we get all, "Oh well, we still love you and if you say sorry, we'll forgive you" with her, then she'll just do it again."
Buffy clenched her teeth together and balled her hands into tiny fists under the table, trying to keep her anger in check at the memories that were threatening to invade her already stressed out mind. "Xander! I can't believe you just said that. I think having your lover leave you is enough punishment for anyone, regardless of the circumstances."
Again Xander stared at Buffy as if she had grown another head. Before he could reply however, Anya offered her opinion.
"Look as an ex-vengeance demon, you know I've got plenty of experience with magic and punishment. Like, this time when this young girl's lover had been using magic to hypnotise her into having sex when she didn't want it. He stupidly left instructions for a friend lying around and she found them. Of course, she tried to leave him, but he only continually magicked her back to him so that he could perform his little hypnosis ritual again. Naturally, I responded to her pain and cursed the bastard for her. To start with I shrank his penis to the size of a chipolata, and then I..."
"An, honey, is there a point in there somewhere?" Xander hurriedly intercepted his Fiancée before the tale could get as gruesome as they usually did. She huffed slightly in response, but continued.
"It's just that if I've learned anything over the last thousand or so years, it's that love and loss go hand in hand, just as magic and its' consequences. Even despite all the grotesque and painful diseases I inflicted on this stupid boy, her leaving him was the one thing that he truly suffered and it taught him the lessons he needed to learn better than anything I could have done to him." She shrank back slightly, thinking that Xander would start criticizing her for talking about her former employment again. Instead, he stared at her in shock, his mouth hanging open.
Buffy smiled slightly at his reaction to Anya's insight, not at all surprised herself. "Mouths look better closed, Xand."
He at last found his voice. "Huh? Oh... right."
"And anyway, Xander" Buffy added. "Aren't you forgetting everything Angel did? You never used to forget. In fact your sole purpose in life for a while seemed to be tormenting me with that reminder - especially when he came back."
Xander hung his head and winced slightly at the memory. "Yeah, okay. But that's dealt with... isn't it? And what's that got to do with Willow, anyway?"
"Everything that Angel... Angelus... did to you and to Giles and to everyone was because of me. You're always making it seem like it was all Angel's fault 'cause he was this big, bad vampire. But ultimately, I was the one who slept with him. I shirked my responsibilities..." she paused for a moment, allowing a brief - albeit painful - smile to cross her lips at such a typical 'Giles' word, before continuing, "... for one careless moment and look what happened. So *I* was responsible for the consequences. But *he left me*. God knows the torture I went through after he left... it hurt so much Xand. It *was* my punishment for everything. You guys were the ones who helped: you didn't judge me or blame me. I think Willow deserves the same respect. After all, Angelus went on this big torture and killing spree - which you guys should have hated me for. In comparison, Willow's magic doesn't come anywhere near as bad... after all, she only altered our memories a little."
"Yeah, but she coulda gotten us killed..." Xander's voice trailed off as he realised what Buffy would say to his outburst. Surprisingly, it was Anya who spoke up again, placing a hand gently on one of Xanders in consolation of the fact that he was fighting a losing battle.
"And she might do it again, if we're not careful. I mean, I'm pretty sure that she won't even if it's just to get Tara back, but we can't be sure. Willow is... very powerful, and it's going to be hard to keep a control over all that power. She's really going to need us around to help and support her. Besides, how can you know that we'd have died? I mean from what I've heard, you were pretty cool dusting that vamp before... and after Buffy realised she had the strength and ability to fight and win, I think we could have gone on as before. Well, maybe not exactly as before, but still... I mean you can change someone's name... change their circumstances, but that doesn't change who they are. Fate has decided that for us anyway, and just because our perception of ourselves may change, what's inside doesn't. So, I don't think we were ever in that much danger... well, except from when the store was invaded with bunnies."
Again Xander gaped at his Fianceé, and once more it was up to Buffy to bridge the silence.
"Come on, Xand. You've got to admit she's right."
"Uh, huh." Still unable to form proper words, he just made odd little vowel sounds and nodded his head slightly as if on a string.
Anya, pleased that she had done something right for a change, patted his hand comfortingly, adding as an afterthought, "It's just a shame that the spell ended when it did, if it had lasted just a few hours longer then Giles would... well, he'd still be here and he'd probably miss his plane... I wonder if he's as good as Xander at giving orgasms?"
That comment snapped Xander out of his stupor. "Why would you wonder that? Actually, I don't think I want to know. Um... Food! Yes, food seems a good idea right now. Anyone for Chinese? I think I'll be getting some. Yes, going *now*." He stumbled slightly as he babbled, but managed to make his way to the door. "An, you coming?"
"Almost... " She replied distractedly, still daydreaming about Giles' kiss. Suddenly realising what she had said, she hastily added, "I've got to look after my horny... I mean my money... I mean..." the sentence died as she realised Xander had gone. [Great. Now he's mad at me. Oh well... I guess if I give him plenty of orgasms he'll forgive me.] She looked back at Buffy to see her reaction.
Buffy had been watching the exchange with an expression halfway between shock and amusement. The amusement gave way to shock when Anya spoke again.
"So, Buffy, now that we're alone... tell me, is Giles good at giving orgasms?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~