Chapter Thirty-six
Alison sat on the couch, flipping through a bridal magazine, the pages flying by in a blur of color. She didn't need to look anyway.
There was only one dress she wanted to wear. Only one wedding she wanted to have. Only one man she wanted to marry.
And it sure as hell wasn't Joshua.
Jamal had told her as best he could what was going on outside this prison she was being held in. It may be furnished like a five-star hotel, there may not be bars on the windows, but she was as trapped as she'd ever felt in her life.
As horrible as it felt, she'd live here forever if it meant that Rafe would be spared.
She heard the door click open, hoping that it was Jamal and not Joshua but still, she didn't look up. She was sure the only person she really wanted to see would not be coming back.
"Ah, there you are. I was wondering where you were hiding." Joshua said with a grin.
Alison tried to make her voice sound sweet as she answered, "I don't know why you're surprised to find me here. I never leave this room."
"But this is your room, my love. I had it designed specifically for you. Don't you like it?"
It was harder than she imagined, actually being civil to this monster. She sighed as she answered, "Yes. Of course. It's lovely."
"As you are. Did I mention how absolutely stunning you look today?"
"No. But, thank you." Alison said softly.
"You're welcome, my sweet." Joshua sat down across from her. Gesturing to the magazine resting in her lap he asked. "Did you find something to your liking?"
"No. Actually, I can't decide. Why don't you choose for me? You have lovely taste in clothes." She said then hoping that'd be enough to get him to leave her alone for a bit.
As she merely looked at Joshua, Alison's skin felt clammy. His gaze made her want to crawl out of it. She wanted nothing more than to step outside of her self and leave this place. She wanted nothing more than to go home.
Home, she sighed again. The thought of home was not merely a word. It was more of a picture in her mind, and the picture was one of Rafe. Wherever he was, that was her home.
She knew it would be hard to let him go. She knew it was the hardest thing she'd ever have to do, but this - oh my God, this was complete torture. The constant ache she felt in her heart nearly killing her minute by minute. It was hard to think of anything else.
Joshua was still speaking to her, she realized that he had been for a while and she was so caught up in her thoughts of Rafe that she hadn't heard a word he said.
"I have the feeling you are distracted, my precious." He said, annoyance lacing his words. "Let me guess. You are still thinking of your slayer."
Closing the magazine and tossing it aside, Alison stood and began to pace. She stopped to gaze out the window "Joshua. I've agreed to marry you, but surely you didn't think I'd forget Rafe that easily."
"No. Of course not. I'm nothing if not a realist, but you must know, my patience is wearing thin. The date of our nuptials is growing closer, and I won't have you pining for another man."
You'll never truly have me at all. Alison thought. I've told you. No matter what you do to me, I will always belong to Rafe.
Maybe she could make him see reason, at least buy herself some time. "I promised you that I would marry you if you'd keep him safe. I can't promise I'll forget Rafe. I never could."
"Of course you can. You just need to try harder. I firmly believe you can do anything you set your mind to." Joshua walked over and placed his hands on her shoulders. And if you have trouble my dear, he thought with a grin, I'd be happy to chemically assist you.
Alison shivered at his touch, but not, of course, in a good way. She was becoming sick to her stomach. Could she actually do this? Could she actually become Joshua's wife to save Rafe? She wasn't so sure anymore. She couldn't stand being five feet away from him, let alone this close. If she had to go through with this, she'd have to be even closer.
He kissed the back of her neck. Feeling his lips there made every nerve in her body tense. Her reaction left him less than pleased. "You need to relax, my dear. I won't bite. Yet."
There it was. She was so caught up in saving Rafe that she'd not fully realized the fact that part of this deal she'd made included her becoming a creature like Joshua herself.
As the truth hit her now, her eyes filled with tears, all her hope drained away.
If she was able to defeat him before he turned her then she had a chance of regaining the life she dreamed of.
If he turned her, she will have lost everything.
She knew Rafe's love for her was strong, stronger than anything she ever imagined, but he could never love her like he once did again, not ever, if she became the very thing he'd been destined to rid the world of.
Alison needed time alone to think it all through. She had to destroy him, before he destroyed her. She turned and crossed to the chaise lounge and sat down. "Joshua. If you don't mind, I'm a bit tired. I'd like to take a nap before dinner."
"Of course. You need your rest." He moved toward her, reaching for something in his jacket pocket. "Why don't I give you something to help you sleep?"
Alison was horrified. She forced her voice to be calm as she said,
"No, that's OK. No, thank
you."
"I think it would help."
Could it actually be worse? Now he wanted to drug her. She couldn't let that happen. She needed a clear head to fight him. If he drugged her, there was a chance he might win.
Desperate to keep him from trying she tried to persuade him again, "Oh no. Joshua, that's not necessary. Please, I'm so tired already."
His hand released the slim case in his pocket and moved to pat her gently on the arm. The drugs could wait. There was still a bit of time, but not much. He wanted her willing when he made her his, and she was anything but at the moment.
"Very well. You take a little nap, some beauty sleep, not that you need it at all you're so incredibly lovely. When we dine this evening we can discuss the plans for the wedding. A small, private ceremony would be best, don't you agree?"
"Yes. That's fine." Alison replied, her voice vacant of any real emotion.
"Sweet dreams, my precious." Joshua said, blowing a kiss as he walked out the door.
Her stomach turned again as she watched him leave.
She lay down and feigned sleep to make sure Joshua stayed away. She was certain he had ways of keeping an eye on her at all times. The truth was, she wanted to sleep more than anything at this moment. Every day since she'd been held here, she couldn't wait for night to fall. It was the only place she was herself again, the only place that she felt safe. She could be with Rafe in her dreams.
She closed her eyes and though she did not sleep she dreamt of him, wondering what he was doing right now. Where was he? She made sure his heart was broken, but how he was reacting to what she had done worried her. He would either go someplace quiet and break down completely, or go off and fight something or someone else to take the pain away. Maybe both, she couldn't be sure. She only knew one thing.
He was safe, he was alive, and that was all that mattered.
Alison sat on the couch, flipping through a bridal magazine, the pages flying by in a blur of color. She didn't need to look anyway.
There was only one dress she wanted to wear. Only one wedding she wanted to have. Only one man she wanted to marry.
And it sure as hell wasn't Joshua.
Jamal had told her as best he could what was going on outside this prison she was being held in. It may be furnished like a five-star hotel, there may not be bars on the windows, but she was as trapped as she'd ever felt in her life.
As horrible as it felt, she'd live here forever if it meant that Rafe would be spared.
She heard the door click open, hoping that it was Jamal and not Joshua but still, she didn't look up. She was sure the only person she really wanted to see would not be coming back.
"Ah, there you are. I was wondering where you were hiding." Joshua said with a grin.
Alison tried to make her voice sound sweet as she answered, "I don't know why you're surprised to find me here. I never leave this room."
"But this is your room, my love. I had it designed specifically for you. Don't you like it?"
It was harder than she imagined, actually being civil to this monster. She sighed as she answered, "Yes. Of course. It's lovely."
"As you are. Did I mention how absolutely stunning you look today?"
"No. But, thank you." Alison said softly.
"You're welcome, my sweet." Joshua sat down across from her. Gesturing to the magazine resting in her lap he asked. "Did you find something to your liking?"
"No. Actually, I can't decide. Why don't you choose for me? You have lovely taste in clothes." She said then hoping that'd be enough to get him to leave her alone for a bit.
As she merely looked at Joshua, Alison's skin felt clammy. His gaze made her want to crawl out of it. She wanted nothing more than to step outside of her self and leave this place. She wanted nothing more than to go home.
Home, she sighed again. The thought of home was not merely a word. It was more of a picture in her mind, and the picture was one of Rafe. Wherever he was, that was her home.
She knew it would be hard to let him go. She knew it was the hardest thing she'd ever have to do, but this - oh my God, this was complete torture. The constant ache she felt in her heart nearly killing her minute by minute. It was hard to think of anything else.
Joshua was still speaking to her, she realized that he had been for a while and she was so caught up in her thoughts of Rafe that she hadn't heard a word he said.
"I have the feeling you are distracted, my precious." He said, annoyance lacing his words. "Let me guess. You are still thinking of your slayer."
Closing the magazine and tossing it aside, Alison stood and began to pace. She stopped to gaze out the window "Joshua. I've agreed to marry you, but surely you didn't think I'd forget Rafe that easily."
"No. Of course not. I'm nothing if not a realist, but you must know, my patience is wearing thin. The date of our nuptials is growing closer, and I won't have you pining for another man."
You'll never truly have me at all. Alison thought. I've told you. No matter what you do to me, I will always belong to Rafe.
Maybe she could make him see reason, at least buy herself some time. "I promised you that I would marry you if you'd keep him safe. I can't promise I'll forget Rafe. I never could."
"Of course you can. You just need to try harder. I firmly believe you can do anything you set your mind to." Joshua walked over and placed his hands on her shoulders. And if you have trouble my dear, he thought with a grin, I'd be happy to chemically assist you.
Alison shivered at his touch, but not, of course, in a good way. She was becoming sick to her stomach. Could she actually do this? Could she actually become Joshua's wife to save Rafe? She wasn't so sure anymore. She couldn't stand being five feet away from him, let alone this close. If she had to go through with this, she'd have to be even closer.
He kissed the back of her neck. Feeling his lips there made every nerve in her body tense. Her reaction left him less than pleased. "You need to relax, my dear. I won't bite. Yet."
There it was. She was so caught up in saving Rafe that she'd not fully realized the fact that part of this deal she'd made included her becoming a creature like Joshua herself.
As the truth hit her now, her eyes filled with tears, all her hope drained away.
If she was able to defeat him before he turned her then she had a chance of regaining the life she dreamed of.
If he turned her, she will have lost everything.
She knew Rafe's love for her was strong, stronger than anything she ever imagined, but he could never love her like he once did again, not ever, if she became the very thing he'd been destined to rid the world of.
Alison needed time alone to think it all through. She had to destroy him, before he destroyed her. She turned and crossed to the chaise lounge and sat down. "Joshua. If you don't mind, I'm a bit tired. I'd like to take a nap before dinner."
"Of course. You need your rest." He moved toward her, reaching for something in his jacket pocket. "Why don't I give you something to help you sleep?"
Alison was horrified. She forced her voice to be calm as she said,
"No, that's OK. No, thank
you."
"I think it would help."
Could it actually be worse? Now he wanted to drug her. She couldn't let that happen. She needed a clear head to fight him. If he drugged her, there was a chance he might win.
Desperate to keep him from trying she tried to persuade him again, "Oh no. Joshua, that's not necessary. Please, I'm so tired already."
His hand released the slim case in his pocket and moved to pat her gently on the arm. The drugs could wait. There was still a bit of time, but not much. He wanted her willing when he made her his, and she was anything but at the moment.
"Very well. You take a little nap, some beauty sleep, not that you need it at all you're so incredibly lovely. When we dine this evening we can discuss the plans for the wedding. A small, private ceremony would be best, don't you agree?"
"Yes. That's fine." Alison replied, her voice vacant of any real emotion.
"Sweet dreams, my precious." Joshua said, blowing a kiss as he walked out the door.
Her stomach turned again as she watched him leave.
She lay down and feigned sleep to make sure Joshua stayed away. She was certain he had ways of keeping an eye on her at all times. The truth was, she wanted to sleep more than anything at this moment. Every day since she'd been held here, she couldn't wait for night to fall. It was the only place she was herself again, the only place that she felt safe. She could be with Rafe in her dreams.
She closed her eyes and though she did not sleep she dreamt of him, wondering what he was doing right now. Where was he? She made sure his heart was broken, but how he was reacting to what she had done worried her. He would either go someplace quiet and break down completely, or go off and fight something or someone else to take the pain away. Maybe both, she couldn't be sure. She only knew one thing.
He was safe, he was alive, and that was all that mattered.