*===*===*===*===*
Stigmatize - 1. To characterize as disgraceful; brand. 2. To mark with stigma
-------- Stigma - 1. A mark or token of infamy or disgrace.
While this describes Yami Bakura, the title is also mocking the authoress. It is my feel at this story so far if it represented me. Lots of love, eh? Go look up infamy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh. I never will.
COMMENTS & THANKS:
A LAUGH THAT IS EVIL: Wow, you review every chapter! Man, I love this fic; you live this fic, and other people too! Like I said, it's like you're me and I'm you! Amazing!
AURORA BELMONT VAMPIRE HUNTER: You are one of the many people who asked why Yami Bakura couldn't see Ryou. Hehehe, he's a difficult Yami! ……………Oh, and all French is excused until further notice.
CHEESEPUFF: You're one of the only people who thought A: "goo goo gah gah". Now I'm not the only one to say that!…………………. Oh, and how could Ryou's dad not be a little bothered out…of…his…mind?
KARADAKI: Are you telling me I HAVE to update because you reviewed? Ehem, well for future reference, I happen to be very stubborn and will delay chapters for such petty reasons! [j/k] I love to update! ^_^………………..Oh and I tend to make Malik both evil and stupid [ignorant].
NONAME: You're the only person to acknowledge the great name change! Wow! ……….Hey, does calling someone Master, just, well, bother you? I never make Ryou call his Yami that because, uh, I just am not…there's something terribly wrong with the word, 'Master'. I don't even know why I'm typing this opinion, though. Okay, shutting up now.
JESSICA: Okay, for all my chapters, I update at a specific number of reviews. In other words 'UPDATE SOON' means absolutely nothing to me. Yeah………………..Yay, my fic has been dubbed 'great' again. *feels specialfully proud*
SHIROI YUKI: "Hunt that boy down" was an anger phrase. He might just give up after seeing Malik. ………………..Oh, I always copy and paste, I can't afford to use all my time reading online. …………………..! "I'll probably sing and then get sued by hundreds of people for making them deaf…." Hey, isn't that what Avril Lavigne does live? [j/k] And if you actually sound like Avril Lavigne [live] don't worry, the studios' have these wonderful devices that synthesize all the sound. They'll fine-tune it so you sound good [on the radio]. ………………………The answer B! Everyone thinks goo is "slimy stuff you don't ever want to touch". I though A, "goo goo gah ah". Okay, I guess I'm just crazy, or, something….
SHESHELALA: Yes, the ninth reviewer! The reason I took so long updating was because I didn't get nine reviews. I'm serious about that review thing! I'm so glad you took the time to do the horrible reviewing so I would update. Yay!
KAEHIMI: Yay, my fic is wonderful! *jumps around the room for five seconds* You not trust Malik? Me neither, but I think Ryou got over it in this fic. *checks future chapters* Yeah, he gets over it. Who you should really not take seriously is my interpretation Yami Bakura. I foretell major heartbreak by him for little Hikari Ryou. *wonders why she [Ego] always puts actions in asterlisks* I wonder why I do that? [cough:cause:I'm:insane:cough]
This is the day [and evening] for Ryou. He's been at the Ishtar's for hours. His dad went to the Game Shop to complain. The Yami Ryou Bakura is somewhere you'll find out next chapter.
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Stigmatize
Chapter 8: Flee
Both boys sat on the floor, one with the guitar and the other instructing the proper fingering for a basic C cord.
"This it, Ryou?"
"Not yet, Malik, but close. Switch the second and third fingers."
"Like this? Am I on the right line thing this time?"
"Fret," Ryou corrected, "Yes, now strum all the strings but low E."
"Hello?"
"All the strings below the fat one on top."
"Oh."
Malik brought his thumb down in a staccato downward brush.
"How was that?" he asked the teacher.
The pale boy held back a hopeless sigh. He nodded politely.
"Closer, but lets move on to something else."
Malik took his fingers out of the C cording.
"Owe," he whined stretching out all five digits, "my hand hurts."
"You were pressing down too hard, Malik," Ryou informed him, "no one's going to try taking the guitar. Also, it helps to drop the wrist. I must have told you that ten times already!"
Malik laughed, "But you make playing look so easy, Ryou! I've gotta see your hands."
Ryou pulled up his sleeve over his wrists and held out his hands, palms up with only the ends of his fingers protruding. Malik put down the instrument, took both, and looked them over, feeling the tips.
"Man, you need a manicure, your fingertips are all peeling and stuff. They're hard too," he added, flicking hardly at one.
"Same for you," Ryou remarked pulling back, "when was the last time you cut your nails, I dare to ask?"
Malik smirked and threw a mock punch at Ryou's head. He stopped right it front of the boy's face, stretched forward a pointer finger, and scratched the pale nose. Ryou kicked Malik square in the stomach, causing him to topple over backwards. Isis came in before a small spare broke out.
"What are you two doing?" she asked with authority, entering the room. Ryou and Malik instantly straightened up.
"Ryou was teaching me to play guitar," Malik answered sitting up.
"Really," she replied disbelieving, "What part of guitar playing says you have to kick your students in the chest?"
"Oh, that's easy! It's the same part that recommends throwing fake punches at the instructor," Malik responded smartly.
"I see you've learned well then," his sister agreed.
"Hell yeah," Malik cheered, "I'm ready to play lead for Billy Joel's guys."
"Uh, he was the Piano Man, Malik," Ryou informed nervously.
"So, is there a better reason?" Malik replied.
"There is no reason…." Ryou remarked confused.
"Quite," Isis replied shortly, "Sorry for my brother's lack of maturity, Ryou," she apologized turning to him, "Feel free to kick the fool anytime you want. Don't worry about any injury it causes. Ra knows, it might just knock some sense into him."
"Uh, yes ma'am," Ryou replied, giving the other boy a sarcastic malicious glare as Isis left the room.
Malik burst into pleas of laughter, falling back. The Ishtar clutched his sides and rolled back and forth. Ryou meekly edged away from the caffeine-hyped teen, grabbing the instrument.
"Malik," he said. The blonde haired Egyptian paused in his spasms to look at Ryou, "I'll just go for a walk now, okay? I'm leaving the guitar so you know I'm coming back. Are you listening?"
Malik nodded, "Sure, go-go ahead, "he paused to take a gulp of air, chuckling, "I won't break it or anything."
Ryou nodded slowly and left. Malik needed to stay away from the midday coffee rush.
*===*===*===*===*
Ryou had been staying at the Ishtar's since Malik had stolen lunch from the grocer. The blonde had lent his friend clothes to replace the former loans from Gabe. After choosing some rather somber garments, Ryou'd been acting convincingly happy, even trying to teach the impossible boy guitar. The entire time he hated how glad the two family members where. If they thought their cheery attitude would rub off on their guest, they were wrong. The behavior only sickened him. The boy tired of the two's company very soon. Merely seeing Malik reminded Ryou of his Dark. He seriously needed out of that area. The place was just depressing.
Ryou left the building quietly. He watched the sun try to shine past the cluttered horizon to the small narrow streets. He made his way up levels of the city till the reached a view point Yuugi had told him about. The sun was able to send its fading orange light onto the smooth plaster and cement. The boy walked to the edge and grabbed the fence loosely. Looking through the wire he could see the full modern vista of Domino City. Far off the sun was setting behind the tall skyscrapers, tinting the zenith a deep crimson red. The usually feathery clouds were solid smoke masses of vivid oranges, golden yellows, and deep purples. Above in far heights the dark inky blackness of the twilight tried to creep in and swallow the show, claiming the sky for night. For now though, the sun continued to portray it ruled the failing appearance. The friend was failing slowly, looking like a sphere surrounded by it's losing light, waning away in a sea of gory blood. There was glory in the fall of the sun, though bathed in red, for it would return again new and sorely bright. It would rise with a white violence making the people below look away and hide beneath lotions and sunglasses. Darkness would only be where the rays could not intrude. Unless, of course, it was the mind of a depressed child, watching the sun abandon him for another side of the world. Like everything else, the fiery orb left him behind.
"You know, you could paint a sunset like that and almost no one would believe it," a voice interrupted.
Ryou jumped and turned around. Sitting against the burnt sienna wall was Yuugi Motou.
"Oh, sorry, Yuugi, I didn't know…" he started.
"Don't worry, Ryou," he said getting up and standing next to his friend.
"So, you finally took my recommendation that this is the best spot for city viewing?"
"Yeah," Ryou forced a smile, "You were right. I can see everything it seems. I can sorta even glimpse my house from here."
Yuugi nodded, "See? That's why I come up so often."
Ryou looked at him confused, "To see my house?"
"What?" Yuugi asked, "Oh, no! It gives me time to think. It's always so quiet up here. If I've had a rather hectic day, I come up and sort myself out."
"Sorry if I bothered you, Yuugi," Ryou apologized.
"No bother. I'm kinda glad someone's up here with me today. I don't feel so lonely that way. I was feeling ignored earlier. I had trouble enjoying the day; everything was sorta in some elusive pack against me. It was like someone started a pool on how long till I snap. I hate that feeling. But, you probably have no idea, everything goes your way." Yuugi sighed and looked at the last vain efforts of the sun to illuminate the landscape.
"I do understand, Yuugi." Ryou muttered slowly. Yuugi looked at him curious. The taller boy continued, "I actually feel like that everyday. My life is always running blindly through the helter-skelter. I just never let you notice or care."
Yuugi looked slightly surprised and disbelieving. Ryou quickly change the subject, "Enough on our lives, though. What were you thinking about before I stopped by?"
"Oh, you, actually," Yuugi replied, thinking back for a few seconds.
"Why? I know I'm not the most interesting topic ever made," Ryou remarked.
"Well, the Spirit told me your father had stopped by the Game Shop. The guy wanted to know how to get rid of a Yami," Yuugi smirked, "He seemed pretty tired of the Tomb Robber."
Ryou looked at Yuugi wide-eyed. He knew at the smirk that the boy had no idea his friend was abused by the Fiend. Either the Pharaoh had not told him or his father had not said anything about it. He quickly blinked away his expression and nodded a bit late.
"Oh," he remarked.
Yuugi looked confused again.
"What's wrong now? How about we jump to you, what were you thinking about? I've already told you about me," the Motou suggested.
Ryou turned to the fence. The sun's battle was lost on their side of the world. Now it rushed to inhabit the other non-patrolled lands far away. All that could be seen of the running general was a large panorama of light. The moon was scarred in battle as it limped in to support light's campaign, waning to a small silver sliver. Soon it would take leave till it could slowly return to full power. But now the sky was a calm, none violent dark blue. The sun had flown in a tragic ocean of color and bizarre, insane light. Now everything was sadly peaceful. It was the same dark after each struggle. Nothing about it had changed. While the rebelling childish sun chose new ways to sink, the old eternal night in the backdrop of the universe slipped into place respectively.
Ryou sighed slightly. The cycle of day and night still went on unhindered. Nothing had stopped in its ancient pattern for Ryou because he was depressed. The lot could have cared less how one minor person felt. A person who held an alter ego aiming for the power to change everything till it fit his demoniac desires. It would be quite alarming to those like Yuugi if suddenly the world were to respond to a lost person's state of mind. Ryou could hardly picture how the sky would appear if his misery were reflected in the view. Now, though, it was obvious that if nature did mimic one person's mood, than that soul was feeling a decent amount of averages. They were happy and normal so nothing changed. Ryou knew that person wasn't him.
"Guitar," he lied finally, "I was thinking about my guitar."
"You're still playing that?" Yuugi asked, "I thought the strings were shot or something."
"I got new ones. I'm not a bad guitarist," he told the boy.
"Oh, really? You should play for all of us sometime. Honda and Jounouchi were trying to make a band. Honda had his dad's keyboard and Jounouchi plays drums for the school marching band," Yuugi smirked again, "They were terrible. All they did was pull stuff from the tops of their heads, which isn't much."
"Those two are hopeless. Could they even write music?" Ryou asked, forcing another smile.
"No," Yuugi informed him, "Maybe you could help them?"
"I don't mind," Ryou shrugged, "but no one's asked yet."
Yuugi nodded, "True, but we all thought you gave up guitar a long time ago."
"Why?" Ryou asked, confused.
"Well, you stopped doing lots of stuff last year. You didn't talk much, didn't eat much," he looked over Ryou's thin form, "You even stopped playing Duel Monsters whenever we asked. All you did was homework and writing. You got kinda creepy. You don't understand how freaked out I am that you're here talking and acting like you used to. I thought that part of you skipped town or something. That's why I didn't say hi when you first came up here. I didn't think you'd stay."
Ryou looked at the fence. He was more normal when his Dark was gone. He had changed that time almost a year ago when the Spirit had started seriously and sexually hurting him. Who wouldn't after what he went through?
Distantly, he traced his fingers over the metal wiring. He felt the cold cords of the woven cage. It tried to prick him with drip points where it had been welted. The sharp efforts were in vain; the boy's fingertips were too hard with his Spartan routine of guitar playing. Calmly he traced the linked rhombi. The boy felt and distantly caressed the thin wiring of the fence. He felt a point and looked at the tip. He pressed his thin-skinned thumb against it, feeling the light prick with a morbid amusement. The metal's point wasn't sharp enough to do any damage, not unless he pressed down with his arm's strength….
"Ryou, stop that," Yuugi ordered.
Ryou looked at the boy quickly, "Stop what?"
"You're going into your conservative little world again. There's something bothering you, what is it? Tell me, Ryou."
Ryou shrugged, repetitively pressing his thumb against the metal in his slight frustration. He stabbed in time to his new headache. He didn't have a headache five minutes ago. Yuugi grabbed his wrist before he drew blood.
"Quite, Ryou, you're gonna-" the boy cut himself off with a small gasp, seeing the arm where the long sleeve had been knocked away, his voice dropping to a whisper, "-hurt yourself."
Ryou looked down as well. Bruises and teeth marks shown darkly in the fading light. Small cuts wound along the pale stretched skin, some from glass, and others from different things. This included scratches from long, sharp nails of the Daemon, which racked the entire body under the dark garments. There were also two or three Ryou had put there himself with a house key. He winced slightly at Yuugi's warm, salty hand clamped around the wounds. The shorter boy let go quickly.
"What happened to you, Ryou? None of those look likes an accident."
Ryou pulled his sleeve down again and replied hastily, "It's nothing, Yuugi."
"You have injuries all up your arm, Ryou! I suppose that's not all either. If it's not you hurting yourself, I want to know who is. Let me and Yami help," the Motou pleaded, a suddenly frightening innocence shining in his eyes.
Ryou started straightening his borrowed clothes, Malik's. He would not look up at Yuugi till he had fixed the dark fabric all over him, from socks to shirt. When he was done, he stared quietly, trying not to blink.
Yuugi watched him sadly. He thought his friend looked like a wraith of what he once was. The pale skin had almost no color save its injuries. The shockingly white hair, still long, messy, and seemingly non-brushed, was a furious white mane around a pained face. The dim light made the two large brown eyes look seriously out of place in their frail setting shadowed by the locks. In a depressingly pathetic, darkly mysterious way, Ryou was still beautiful. But, the boy was almost dangerously thin, except a slightly round boyish face, with hardly any physic. His eyes had a pitiable sad, scared, and lonely look all at once. He wanted help but did not want to be a burden or be lied to. It was confusing to try and see hope in the face.
Yuugi felt sorry for his friend. He noted sadly that there were no scares on the ghostlike face. The Devil had been smart enough to make sure nobody noticed. Yuugi had no idea of how long Ryou had hidden the torment under long garments. But, he suspected it had been longer than when Ryou started to change. Yuugi hoped there had been a turn for the better. Ryou had been happy earlier. Maybe the boy had solved his problem on his own. The Motou wished it were so.
Ryou just looked up at him eerily. Yuugi felt a shiver travel up his spine. Ryou had become cold and frightening again. The boy wished he hadn't seen the arm. He really wished he hadn't seen the arm.
*===*===*===*===*
For a long time the two roamed in silence on the viewing area. Ryou didn't answer Yuugi's last question about who hurt him. He told himself he didn't want to tell the boy anything. He lied that he didn't want anyone to care. He stared at the sky angrily. The sun wasn't completely gone yet, but the small dying moon was crawling above. I was dark till a nearby electric light clicked to life. It's brightness made it almost impossible to see the last glow in the horizon. The valiant sun was now just running. It had given up for the day.
Quite suddenly, Yami Yuugi was present standing next to his Hikari. Ryou looked up at him in fear. He wondered again whether or not the Spirit of the Puzzle knew things, certain bits of information, from his father.
"Ryou Bakura?" the Spirit asked seeing him.
Ryou looked the taller Yuugi in the eye. The crimson orbs told confusingly of concern and relief, with the fading shock of surprise. The Spirit obviously had not expected to see Ryou with Yuugi but was glad he was there anyway.
"Yes," he replied to the Spirit's inquiry. He was slowly learning how to use few words.
"Oh, sorry, where you and Yuugi talking?" he asked.
"No," Ryou answered before the little boy could open his mouth. Yuugi looked at him, hurt and surprised.
"Oh, well, Hikari," the Spirit nodded turning his attentions to the smaller boy, "You must go to your soul room before Grandpa finds out you've 'completely blown' you curfew. He wants you indoors by eight, remember?"
Yuugi nodded and left; letting the dark spirit take over their body. Ryou watched angrily. Yuugi was so willing; the Spirit didn't have to force his Light to do anything. There was a trust. Ryou looked away before he choked, a furrow scorning his often-smooth brow.
"Ryou Bakura, I must have a talk with you," the Spirit said, walking up.
Ryou didn't turn around, just faced the wall. He didn't have to sit through a lecture if he wasn't going to listen. Anyway, he hardly knew the Spirit of the Puzzle past his great dueling abilities and friendship with Yuugi. Him and his Light got along so well that it bothered Ryou. He was always annoyed when the two where there because he wished his own life sharer was so forgiving. Of course, Ryou wished lots of things. The wanting for the unachievable was frustrating. The Pharaoh's presence wasn't helping and the Yami wanted to talk. How did discussing things improve them? Ryou had heard enough pity rants from Malik, Selina, Yuugi, and himself.
"We must talk. Let me," the Spirit asked quietly. Ryou felt a chill run up his spine as the Fiend approached.
"Okay," he replied turning around. He caught his breath and stepped back quickly. Yami Yuugi was right behind him and in turning he'd tilted almost to close. It made him easier to have at least a foot between them. Quickly he tried to collect his dignity, resuming his scowl, "Take a number and get in line. Maybe I could schedule you a day to come and yap all you want. How's the thirty-first of Never sound?"
Yami Yuugi sighed and resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the child. The Bakura boy was usually so quiet and of an almost stoic nature. Why was he being so difficult now? So sarcastic and defying, it was like a different young man stood before him. What had happened to the withdrawn and polite child Little Yuugi had made friends with?
"You've changed," the Ancient Spirit mused aloud, "You never used to act like this."
"Act like what?" the boy asked in a lighter tone. The Spirit heard a familiar tone of the old Ryou behind it. Curious, the boy was curious.
Yami raised his hand (at which Ryou suppressed a flinch) and began to tick off on his fingers, "Well, you're more cautious, paranoid, still quiet, but I don't see you usual shyness very often in that, only restraint. You're keeping secrets that probably shouldn't be held by anyone. It's obvious in the way you talk, the way you respond to others. Just now I was more than seven inches from you and you jumped back nearly a foot and a half. My presence seems to alarm you."
Ryou had forgotten the Spirit tended to be a shrink at times. He repeated over and over that the Spirit was reading his mind or something. That had to be it. He resisted the urge to sidestep away as the Pharaoh got nearer, closing the gap between them to five or six inches. The Yami suddenly seemed a lot taller.
"Why don't you back up, Ryou? I know you want to," the Spirit mocked mildly.
Ryou tensed slightly as he felt the strong urge to run. He kept himself from sprinting away though, to defy the Yami. He avoided the other's eyes stubbornly.
Yami Yuugi watched him sadly.
/ His arms, Yami, they're horrible! / Yuugi had told him earlier.
The Spirit reached down for the boy's hand. Ryou twitched slightly at the approach, but let him grab the fingers. Carefully his turned to palm upwards and lifted the arm to the light. Ryou had almost stopped breathing at a livable rate. The boy soon held his breath as the cloth was pulled back from the arm.
Yuugi had been right; the injuries did travel up the entire length of flesh. The red cuts and wrinkles of scars shown roughly in the dim city light. Large shadowy blotches were all over. The Spirit took a chilling note of the teeth marks; human teeth marks like a five-year-old accomplishes when it wants to wear a new pretty Band-Aid. They didn't break skin (or at least most didn't) but left red traces. There were scrapes and cuts, one obviously a knife wound. There were even five welds that took the position to be of five digits on the same hand.
"How much of this did he do? How much did you?" he asked quietly.
Ryou didn't answer. The Spirit became aware that the boy was vibrating violently. The child was terrified. He looked at the young man's frightened expression and let go of the hand. The boy panicked instantly for five seconds.
Ryou shot back quickly. He yanked his arm back so fast he lost balance and fell backwards. He crawled away on all fours stomach up spider-like till he hit the wall. There he had to stop, cornered. He looked up in terror. For a brief moment, Ryou had picture to Spirit of the Ring grabbing him. He had imagined the evil air of the Fiend taking him in.
"Yuugi was right," the Yami pondered orally, "You have been abused. I'm sorry if you were hurt falling back. Here, let me help you," he offered.
The Pharaoh held out his hand and leaned forward to grab Ryou's to help him up. Ryou pulled away quickly.
"Don't touch me!" he ordered, using the wall as a hasty support instead of the friendly hand.
"Ryou," the Spirit murmured.
The boy looked at the Yami in pain at the boldness to understand, or attempt to understand.
"Leave me alone," the boy muttered dejectedly.
No longer resisting the urge to flee, Ryou ran back into the building, down the stairs, and out into the street. There were no sounds of pursuit, but he sprinted down the block any way. He had to get away, far away.
*===*===*===*===*
You know, for the longest time I was stuck at eight reviews? I requested nine. I'm serious about the review thing, everyone!
Okay, it took a while to get nine reviews. I'm asking for eight now because I feel bad. Warning: low self esteem; evacuate the premises in an orderly fashion.
If my confidence dies, so does the fic!
This update's question:
Do any of you know what Latin phrase 'Musica excitat animum' means? I'm not too sure I spelled it right in this document, but I carved it correctly into my friend's piano yesterday. He hasn't seen it yet! If you don't know what it is, but what to know, review and ask! [Heh, I know, I've written it all over the orchestra and choir rooms!]
Stigmatize - 1. To characterize as disgraceful; brand. 2. To mark with stigma
-------- Stigma - 1. A mark or token of infamy or disgrace.
While this describes Yami Bakura, the title is also mocking the authoress. It is my feel at this story so far if it represented me. Lots of love, eh? Go look up infamy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh. I never will.
COMMENTS & THANKS:
A LAUGH THAT IS EVIL: Wow, you review every chapter! Man, I love this fic; you live this fic, and other people too! Like I said, it's like you're me and I'm you! Amazing!
AURORA BELMONT VAMPIRE HUNTER: You are one of the many people who asked why Yami Bakura couldn't see Ryou. Hehehe, he's a difficult Yami! ……………Oh, and all French is excused until further notice.
CHEESEPUFF: You're one of the only people who thought A: "goo goo gah gah". Now I'm not the only one to say that!…………………. Oh, and how could Ryou's dad not be a little bothered out…of…his…mind?
KARADAKI: Are you telling me I HAVE to update because you reviewed? Ehem, well for future reference, I happen to be very stubborn and will delay chapters for such petty reasons! [j/k] I love to update! ^_^………………..Oh and I tend to make Malik both evil and stupid [ignorant].
NONAME: You're the only person to acknowledge the great name change! Wow! ……….Hey, does calling someone Master, just, well, bother you? I never make Ryou call his Yami that because, uh, I just am not…there's something terribly wrong with the word, 'Master'. I don't even know why I'm typing this opinion, though. Okay, shutting up now.
JESSICA: Okay, for all my chapters, I update at a specific number of reviews. In other words 'UPDATE SOON' means absolutely nothing to me. Yeah………………..Yay, my fic has been dubbed 'great' again. *feels specialfully proud*
SHIROI YUKI: "Hunt that boy down" was an anger phrase. He might just give up after seeing Malik. ………………..Oh, I always copy and paste, I can't afford to use all my time reading online. …………………..! "I'll probably sing and then get sued by hundreds of people for making them deaf…." Hey, isn't that what Avril Lavigne does live? [j/k] And if you actually sound like Avril Lavigne [live] don't worry, the studios' have these wonderful devices that synthesize all the sound. They'll fine-tune it so you sound good [on the radio]. ………………………The answer B! Everyone thinks goo is "slimy stuff you don't ever want to touch". I though A, "goo goo gah ah". Okay, I guess I'm just crazy, or, something….
SHESHELALA: Yes, the ninth reviewer! The reason I took so long updating was because I didn't get nine reviews. I'm serious about that review thing! I'm so glad you took the time to do the horrible reviewing so I would update. Yay!
KAEHIMI: Yay, my fic is wonderful! *jumps around the room for five seconds* You not trust Malik? Me neither, but I think Ryou got over it in this fic. *checks future chapters* Yeah, he gets over it. Who you should really not take seriously is my interpretation Yami Bakura. I foretell major heartbreak by him for little Hikari Ryou. *wonders why she [Ego] always puts actions in asterlisks* I wonder why I do that? [cough:cause:I'm:insane:cough]
This is the day [and evening] for Ryou. He's been at the Ishtar's for hours. His dad went to the Game Shop to complain. The Yami Ryou Bakura is somewhere you'll find out next chapter.
*===*===*===*===* *===*===*===*===*
Stigmatize
Chapter 8: Flee
Both boys sat on the floor, one with the guitar and the other instructing the proper fingering for a basic C cord.
"This it, Ryou?"
"Not yet, Malik, but close. Switch the second and third fingers."
"Like this? Am I on the right line thing this time?"
"Fret," Ryou corrected, "Yes, now strum all the strings but low E."
"Hello?"
"All the strings below the fat one on top."
"Oh."
Malik brought his thumb down in a staccato downward brush.
"How was that?" he asked the teacher.
The pale boy held back a hopeless sigh. He nodded politely.
"Closer, but lets move on to something else."
Malik took his fingers out of the C cording.
"Owe," he whined stretching out all five digits, "my hand hurts."
"You were pressing down too hard, Malik," Ryou informed him, "no one's going to try taking the guitar. Also, it helps to drop the wrist. I must have told you that ten times already!"
Malik laughed, "But you make playing look so easy, Ryou! I've gotta see your hands."
Ryou pulled up his sleeve over his wrists and held out his hands, palms up with only the ends of his fingers protruding. Malik put down the instrument, took both, and looked them over, feeling the tips.
"Man, you need a manicure, your fingertips are all peeling and stuff. They're hard too," he added, flicking hardly at one.
"Same for you," Ryou remarked pulling back, "when was the last time you cut your nails, I dare to ask?"
Malik smirked and threw a mock punch at Ryou's head. He stopped right it front of the boy's face, stretched forward a pointer finger, and scratched the pale nose. Ryou kicked Malik square in the stomach, causing him to topple over backwards. Isis came in before a small spare broke out.
"What are you two doing?" she asked with authority, entering the room. Ryou and Malik instantly straightened up.
"Ryou was teaching me to play guitar," Malik answered sitting up.
"Really," she replied disbelieving, "What part of guitar playing says you have to kick your students in the chest?"
"Oh, that's easy! It's the same part that recommends throwing fake punches at the instructor," Malik responded smartly.
"I see you've learned well then," his sister agreed.
"Hell yeah," Malik cheered, "I'm ready to play lead for Billy Joel's guys."
"Uh, he was the Piano Man, Malik," Ryou informed nervously.
"So, is there a better reason?" Malik replied.
"There is no reason…." Ryou remarked confused.
"Quite," Isis replied shortly, "Sorry for my brother's lack of maturity, Ryou," she apologized turning to him, "Feel free to kick the fool anytime you want. Don't worry about any injury it causes. Ra knows, it might just knock some sense into him."
"Uh, yes ma'am," Ryou replied, giving the other boy a sarcastic malicious glare as Isis left the room.
Malik burst into pleas of laughter, falling back. The Ishtar clutched his sides and rolled back and forth. Ryou meekly edged away from the caffeine-hyped teen, grabbing the instrument.
"Malik," he said. The blonde haired Egyptian paused in his spasms to look at Ryou, "I'll just go for a walk now, okay? I'm leaving the guitar so you know I'm coming back. Are you listening?"
Malik nodded, "Sure, go-go ahead, "he paused to take a gulp of air, chuckling, "I won't break it or anything."
Ryou nodded slowly and left. Malik needed to stay away from the midday coffee rush.
*===*===*===*===*
Ryou had been staying at the Ishtar's since Malik had stolen lunch from the grocer. The blonde had lent his friend clothes to replace the former loans from Gabe. After choosing some rather somber garments, Ryou'd been acting convincingly happy, even trying to teach the impossible boy guitar. The entire time he hated how glad the two family members where. If they thought their cheery attitude would rub off on their guest, they were wrong. The behavior only sickened him. The boy tired of the two's company very soon. Merely seeing Malik reminded Ryou of his Dark. He seriously needed out of that area. The place was just depressing.
Ryou left the building quietly. He watched the sun try to shine past the cluttered horizon to the small narrow streets. He made his way up levels of the city till the reached a view point Yuugi had told him about. The sun was able to send its fading orange light onto the smooth plaster and cement. The boy walked to the edge and grabbed the fence loosely. Looking through the wire he could see the full modern vista of Domino City. Far off the sun was setting behind the tall skyscrapers, tinting the zenith a deep crimson red. The usually feathery clouds were solid smoke masses of vivid oranges, golden yellows, and deep purples. Above in far heights the dark inky blackness of the twilight tried to creep in and swallow the show, claiming the sky for night. For now though, the sun continued to portray it ruled the failing appearance. The friend was failing slowly, looking like a sphere surrounded by it's losing light, waning away in a sea of gory blood. There was glory in the fall of the sun, though bathed in red, for it would return again new and sorely bright. It would rise with a white violence making the people below look away and hide beneath lotions and sunglasses. Darkness would only be where the rays could not intrude. Unless, of course, it was the mind of a depressed child, watching the sun abandon him for another side of the world. Like everything else, the fiery orb left him behind.
"You know, you could paint a sunset like that and almost no one would believe it," a voice interrupted.
Ryou jumped and turned around. Sitting against the burnt sienna wall was Yuugi Motou.
"Oh, sorry, Yuugi, I didn't know…" he started.
"Don't worry, Ryou," he said getting up and standing next to his friend.
"So, you finally took my recommendation that this is the best spot for city viewing?"
"Yeah," Ryou forced a smile, "You were right. I can see everything it seems. I can sorta even glimpse my house from here."
Yuugi nodded, "See? That's why I come up so often."
Ryou looked at him confused, "To see my house?"
"What?" Yuugi asked, "Oh, no! It gives me time to think. It's always so quiet up here. If I've had a rather hectic day, I come up and sort myself out."
"Sorry if I bothered you, Yuugi," Ryou apologized.
"No bother. I'm kinda glad someone's up here with me today. I don't feel so lonely that way. I was feeling ignored earlier. I had trouble enjoying the day; everything was sorta in some elusive pack against me. It was like someone started a pool on how long till I snap. I hate that feeling. But, you probably have no idea, everything goes your way." Yuugi sighed and looked at the last vain efforts of the sun to illuminate the landscape.
"I do understand, Yuugi." Ryou muttered slowly. Yuugi looked at him curious. The taller boy continued, "I actually feel like that everyday. My life is always running blindly through the helter-skelter. I just never let you notice or care."
Yuugi looked slightly surprised and disbelieving. Ryou quickly change the subject, "Enough on our lives, though. What were you thinking about before I stopped by?"
"Oh, you, actually," Yuugi replied, thinking back for a few seconds.
"Why? I know I'm not the most interesting topic ever made," Ryou remarked.
"Well, the Spirit told me your father had stopped by the Game Shop. The guy wanted to know how to get rid of a Yami," Yuugi smirked, "He seemed pretty tired of the Tomb Robber."
Ryou looked at Yuugi wide-eyed. He knew at the smirk that the boy had no idea his friend was abused by the Fiend. Either the Pharaoh had not told him or his father had not said anything about it. He quickly blinked away his expression and nodded a bit late.
"Oh," he remarked.
Yuugi looked confused again.
"What's wrong now? How about we jump to you, what were you thinking about? I've already told you about me," the Motou suggested.
Ryou turned to the fence. The sun's battle was lost on their side of the world. Now it rushed to inhabit the other non-patrolled lands far away. All that could be seen of the running general was a large panorama of light. The moon was scarred in battle as it limped in to support light's campaign, waning to a small silver sliver. Soon it would take leave till it could slowly return to full power. But now the sky was a calm, none violent dark blue. The sun had flown in a tragic ocean of color and bizarre, insane light. Now everything was sadly peaceful. It was the same dark after each struggle. Nothing about it had changed. While the rebelling childish sun chose new ways to sink, the old eternal night in the backdrop of the universe slipped into place respectively.
Ryou sighed slightly. The cycle of day and night still went on unhindered. Nothing had stopped in its ancient pattern for Ryou because he was depressed. The lot could have cared less how one minor person felt. A person who held an alter ego aiming for the power to change everything till it fit his demoniac desires. It would be quite alarming to those like Yuugi if suddenly the world were to respond to a lost person's state of mind. Ryou could hardly picture how the sky would appear if his misery were reflected in the view. Now, though, it was obvious that if nature did mimic one person's mood, than that soul was feeling a decent amount of averages. They were happy and normal so nothing changed. Ryou knew that person wasn't him.
"Guitar," he lied finally, "I was thinking about my guitar."
"You're still playing that?" Yuugi asked, "I thought the strings were shot or something."
"I got new ones. I'm not a bad guitarist," he told the boy.
"Oh, really? You should play for all of us sometime. Honda and Jounouchi were trying to make a band. Honda had his dad's keyboard and Jounouchi plays drums for the school marching band," Yuugi smirked again, "They were terrible. All they did was pull stuff from the tops of their heads, which isn't much."
"Those two are hopeless. Could they even write music?" Ryou asked, forcing another smile.
"No," Yuugi informed him, "Maybe you could help them?"
"I don't mind," Ryou shrugged, "but no one's asked yet."
Yuugi nodded, "True, but we all thought you gave up guitar a long time ago."
"Why?" Ryou asked, confused.
"Well, you stopped doing lots of stuff last year. You didn't talk much, didn't eat much," he looked over Ryou's thin form, "You even stopped playing Duel Monsters whenever we asked. All you did was homework and writing. You got kinda creepy. You don't understand how freaked out I am that you're here talking and acting like you used to. I thought that part of you skipped town or something. That's why I didn't say hi when you first came up here. I didn't think you'd stay."
Ryou looked at the fence. He was more normal when his Dark was gone. He had changed that time almost a year ago when the Spirit had started seriously and sexually hurting him. Who wouldn't after what he went through?
Distantly, he traced his fingers over the metal wiring. He felt the cold cords of the woven cage. It tried to prick him with drip points where it had been welted. The sharp efforts were in vain; the boy's fingertips were too hard with his Spartan routine of guitar playing. Calmly he traced the linked rhombi. The boy felt and distantly caressed the thin wiring of the fence. He felt a point and looked at the tip. He pressed his thin-skinned thumb against it, feeling the light prick with a morbid amusement. The metal's point wasn't sharp enough to do any damage, not unless he pressed down with his arm's strength….
"Ryou, stop that," Yuugi ordered.
Ryou looked at the boy quickly, "Stop what?"
"You're going into your conservative little world again. There's something bothering you, what is it? Tell me, Ryou."
Ryou shrugged, repetitively pressing his thumb against the metal in his slight frustration. He stabbed in time to his new headache. He didn't have a headache five minutes ago. Yuugi grabbed his wrist before he drew blood.
"Quite, Ryou, you're gonna-" the boy cut himself off with a small gasp, seeing the arm where the long sleeve had been knocked away, his voice dropping to a whisper, "-hurt yourself."
Ryou looked down as well. Bruises and teeth marks shown darkly in the fading light. Small cuts wound along the pale stretched skin, some from glass, and others from different things. This included scratches from long, sharp nails of the Daemon, which racked the entire body under the dark garments. There were also two or three Ryou had put there himself with a house key. He winced slightly at Yuugi's warm, salty hand clamped around the wounds. The shorter boy let go quickly.
"What happened to you, Ryou? None of those look likes an accident."
Ryou pulled his sleeve down again and replied hastily, "It's nothing, Yuugi."
"You have injuries all up your arm, Ryou! I suppose that's not all either. If it's not you hurting yourself, I want to know who is. Let me and Yami help," the Motou pleaded, a suddenly frightening innocence shining in his eyes.
Ryou started straightening his borrowed clothes, Malik's. He would not look up at Yuugi till he had fixed the dark fabric all over him, from socks to shirt. When he was done, he stared quietly, trying not to blink.
Yuugi watched him sadly. He thought his friend looked like a wraith of what he once was. The pale skin had almost no color save its injuries. The shockingly white hair, still long, messy, and seemingly non-brushed, was a furious white mane around a pained face. The dim light made the two large brown eyes look seriously out of place in their frail setting shadowed by the locks. In a depressingly pathetic, darkly mysterious way, Ryou was still beautiful. But, the boy was almost dangerously thin, except a slightly round boyish face, with hardly any physic. His eyes had a pitiable sad, scared, and lonely look all at once. He wanted help but did not want to be a burden or be lied to. It was confusing to try and see hope in the face.
Yuugi felt sorry for his friend. He noted sadly that there were no scares on the ghostlike face. The Devil had been smart enough to make sure nobody noticed. Yuugi had no idea of how long Ryou had hidden the torment under long garments. But, he suspected it had been longer than when Ryou started to change. Yuugi hoped there had been a turn for the better. Ryou had been happy earlier. Maybe the boy had solved his problem on his own. The Motou wished it were so.
Ryou just looked up at him eerily. Yuugi felt a shiver travel up his spine. Ryou had become cold and frightening again. The boy wished he hadn't seen the arm. He really wished he hadn't seen the arm.
*===*===*===*===*
For a long time the two roamed in silence on the viewing area. Ryou didn't answer Yuugi's last question about who hurt him. He told himself he didn't want to tell the boy anything. He lied that he didn't want anyone to care. He stared at the sky angrily. The sun wasn't completely gone yet, but the small dying moon was crawling above. I was dark till a nearby electric light clicked to life. It's brightness made it almost impossible to see the last glow in the horizon. The valiant sun was now just running. It had given up for the day.
Quite suddenly, Yami Yuugi was present standing next to his Hikari. Ryou looked up at him in fear. He wondered again whether or not the Spirit of the Puzzle knew things, certain bits of information, from his father.
"Ryou Bakura?" the Spirit asked seeing him.
Ryou looked the taller Yuugi in the eye. The crimson orbs told confusingly of concern and relief, with the fading shock of surprise. The Spirit obviously had not expected to see Ryou with Yuugi but was glad he was there anyway.
"Yes," he replied to the Spirit's inquiry. He was slowly learning how to use few words.
"Oh, sorry, where you and Yuugi talking?" he asked.
"No," Ryou answered before the little boy could open his mouth. Yuugi looked at him, hurt and surprised.
"Oh, well, Hikari," the Spirit nodded turning his attentions to the smaller boy, "You must go to your soul room before Grandpa finds out you've 'completely blown' you curfew. He wants you indoors by eight, remember?"
Yuugi nodded and left; letting the dark spirit take over their body. Ryou watched angrily. Yuugi was so willing; the Spirit didn't have to force his Light to do anything. There was a trust. Ryou looked away before he choked, a furrow scorning his often-smooth brow.
"Ryou Bakura, I must have a talk with you," the Spirit said, walking up.
Ryou didn't turn around, just faced the wall. He didn't have to sit through a lecture if he wasn't going to listen. Anyway, he hardly knew the Spirit of the Puzzle past his great dueling abilities and friendship with Yuugi. Him and his Light got along so well that it bothered Ryou. He was always annoyed when the two where there because he wished his own life sharer was so forgiving. Of course, Ryou wished lots of things. The wanting for the unachievable was frustrating. The Pharaoh's presence wasn't helping and the Yami wanted to talk. How did discussing things improve them? Ryou had heard enough pity rants from Malik, Selina, Yuugi, and himself.
"We must talk. Let me," the Spirit asked quietly. Ryou felt a chill run up his spine as the Fiend approached.
"Okay," he replied turning around. He caught his breath and stepped back quickly. Yami Yuugi was right behind him and in turning he'd tilted almost to close. It made him easier to have at least a foot between them. Quickly he tried to collect his dignity, resuming his scowl, "Take a number and get in line. Maybe I could schedule you a day to come and yap all you want. How's the thirty-first of Never sound?"
Yami Yuugi sighed and resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the child. The Bakura boy was usually so quiet and of an almost stoic nature. Why was he being so difficult now? So sarcastic and defying, it was like a different young man stood before him. What had happened to the withdrawn and polite child Little Yuugi had made friends with?
"You've changed," the Ancient Spirit mused aloud, "You never used to act like this."
"Act like what?" the boy asked in a lighter tone. The Spirit heard a familiar tone of the old Ryou behind it. Curious, the boy was curious.
Yami raised his hand (at which Ryou suppressed a flinch) and began to tick off on his fingers, "Well, you're more cautious, paranoid, still quiet, but I don't see you usual shyness very often in that, only restraint. You're keeping secrets that probably shouldn't be held by anyone. It's obvious in the way you talk, the way you respond to others. Just now I was more than seven inches from you and you jumped back nearly a foot and a half. My presence seems to alarm you."
Ryou had forgotten the Spirit tended to be a shrink at times. He repeated over and over that the Spirit was reading his mind or something. That had to be it. He resisted the urge to sidestep away as the Pharaoh got nearer, closing the gap between them to five or six inches. The Yami suddenly seemed a lot taller.
"Why don't you back up, Ryou? I know you want to," the Spirit mocked mildly.
Ryou tensed slightly as he felt the strong urge to run. He kept himself from sprinting away though, to defy the Yami. He avoided the other's eyes stubbornly.
Yami Yuugi watched him sadly.
/ His arms, Yami, they're horrible! / Yuugi had told him earlier.
The Spirit reached down for the boy's hand. Ryou twitched slightly at the approach, but let him grab the fingers. Carefully his turned to palm upwards and lifted the arm to the light. Ryou had almost stopped breathing at a livable rate. The boy soon held his breath as the cloth was pulled back from the arm.
Yuugi had been right; the injuries did travel up the entire length of flesh. The red cuts and wrinkles of scars shown roughly in the dim city light. Large shadowy blotches were all over. The Spirit took a chilling note of the teeth marks; human teeth marks like a five-year-old accomplishes when it wants to wear a new pretty Band-Aid. They didn't break skin (or at least most didn't) but left red traces. There were scrapes and cuts, one obviously a knife wound. There were even five welds that took the position to be of five digits on the same hand.
"How much of this did he do? How much did you?" he asked quietly.
Ryou didn't answer. The Spirit became aware that the boy was vibrating violently. The child was terrified. He looked at the young man's frightened expression and let go of the hand. The boy panicked instantly for five seconds.
Ryou shot back quickly. He yanked his arm back so fast he lost balance and fell backwards. He crawled away on all fours stomach up spider-like till he hit the wall. There he had to stop, cornered. He looked up in terror. For a brief moment, Ryou had picture to Spirit of the Ring grabbing him. He had imagined the evil air of the Fiend taking him in.
"Yuugi was right," the Yami pondered orally, "You have been abused. I'm sorry if you were hurt falling back. Here, let me help you," he offered.
The Pharaoh held out his hand and leaned forward to grab Ryou's to help him up. Ryou pulled away quickly.
"Don't touch me!" he ordered, using the wall as a hasty support instead of the friendly hand.
"Ryou," the Spirit murmured.
The boy looked at the Yami in pain at the boldness to understand, or attempt to understand.
"Leave me alone," the boy muttered dejectedly.
No longer resisting the urge to flee, Ryou ran back into the building, down the stairs, and out into the street. There were no sounds of pursuit, but he sprinted down the block any way. He had to get away, far away.
*===*===*===*===*
You know, for the longest time I was stuck at eight reviews? I requested nine. I'm serious about the review thing, everyone!
Okay, it took a while to get nine reviews. I'm asking for eight now because I feel bad. Warning: low self esteem; evacuate the premises in an orderly fashion.
If my confidence dies, so does the fic!
This update's question:
Do any of you know what Latin phrase 'Musica excitat animum' means? I'm not too sure I spelled it right in this document, but I carved it correctly into my friend's piano yesterday. He hasn't seen it yet! If you don't know what it is, but what to know, review and ask! [Heh, I know, I've written it all over the orchestra and choir rooms!]