Solace

by Queen of Blades

The sequal to Guardian Angel. Not a straight sequal, as it picks up a little before the end... it's based on some RP at the Red Dragon Inn. Korunue makes friends and strives to find some sort of self-worth. (cheesy, I know, but read it anyways, it's not t

11. Start it up

Solace chapter 11

Did I ever mention I own Psiona? heh... .

Inuyasha follows a large black bird into the forest, hunting for someone. The bird leads him to Ronin, and he pauses. He wears a sword, not Tetsaiga but a regular Katana, without any decoration. He pauses at the edge of the clearing, looking over the boy, growling softly, as the bird circles and flies off. She had her own prey to hunt, after all.
Ronin groans and opens his eyes. All he can see is the ground. Grumbling he sits up and takes a quick look around. The first thing he notices is a letter stuck to a nearby tree with a dagger. He grabs the dagger and tucks it into one of his sleeves before reading the letter. As he reads his eyes get wide and he starts to growl and finally curse out loud. Ater a few moments he calms himself down and hears the growl coming from the edge of the clearing. He spins around and faces whoever it is.
Inuyasha storms into the clearing, grabbing Ronin's shirt, intending to lift him up by the front of the shirt. He does grab the shirt, but the man is too heavy to lift off the ground easily. He leans into Ronin, growling in his face. "Listen up, punk, and listen good, 'cause I'm only gonna say this once. Where is my daughter?! If you've done anything to her, so help me I'll..." he trails off. His eyes hold concern as well as fury as he meets Ronin's gaze.
Ronin glares back. "Your daughter? Does this make you the one who lets her think she is a freak?" he growls back. His fists ball up at his sides and his ears focus on the man.
Inuyasha growls, snarling in rage. He moves his arm straight out to the side, letting go of Ronin's shirt, intending to fling him into a tree. He then draws his sword, holding it in both hands by his head as he rushes Ronin. He pivots on his left leg, bringing the sword around to behead him... then stops, as surely as if someone had grabbed his arm. He snarls, bringing the sword slowly to Ronin's neck, not cutting, just holding it there as he leans over it. "tell me where she is."
Ronin flips in midair, his feet hitting the tree. He hops down to the ground and stands at his full height, looking at Inu. His arms are crossed, his hands inside their opposite sleeves. "I wish I knew myself old man." He doesn't even flinch at the sword at his neck.
Inuyasha glares at him, staring the younger man down. He lowers the sword a little. "So you've lost her. If anything happens to her... I'll know who to blame. You. I heard all about your little seppuku "escapades". No daughter of mine will die by her own hand!" he snarls, dropping the sword into it's sheath and leaping up into the tree. He leaps tree to tree, over 3 trees, before dropping to the ground and runnning, as far and as fast as his feet can take him, trying to force the thoughts from his mind, and the worry as well.
Ronin stands there and watches the man run off. He suddenly remembers the letter in his hand. He opens his palm and looks at the little crushed piece of paper. Slowly opening it again, he rereads it. His ears pop up and he looks in the direction that the man had run off in. "Maybe he knows something." he says to himself out loud before sprinting off after him.
Inuyasha collapses, panting, near a stream at last. He shuts his eyes, breath coming hard, beliving himself alone. He knows better than to do what he'd like- throw his head back and howl for her return- but instead allows a few tears for her to break the normally cool surface. His beloved daughter, his only child, and her mother long gone... it was almost too much.
Ronin leaps up into the trees and hops along them for a while. Finally he sees the man near a stream. Ronin glances around and hops to a tree near Inu. He climbs out onto a branch, hanging off the bottom of it and staring at the man.
Inu suddanly stops crying, ears pointing behind him. He dries his tears quickly on his sleeve, almost too fast to be seen, and whirls around into a crouch, glaring at the younger man. "What now? Gonna kill me, too? Knock off the old man as well as the daughter?" he snarls, knowing he was going too far and not caring, such was his grief.
Ronin frowns at the man and lets go of the tree. Spinning around to land in a crouch. "I want to find her just as bad as you do." He stares at Inu for a moment. "You really don't know about my relations with her do you?" he says slowly, as if coming to a realization.
Inu stares at him, fearing the worst. "I was informed that you were the reason for her... madness, shall we say." He studies the man for a bit. "If you've ruined her for marriage..." knowing that he would understand that the only girls desirable for marriage were virgins.
Ronin shakes his head at the man. "What madness exactly? And no, I haven't ruined her. I would never, the thought has yet to cross my mind."
Inu looks him in the eye. "Whatever madness possesed her to... " he suddanly becomes angry again. "You know perfectly well what madness! This strange fixation... this is all your fault! She was fine before she met you!" he growls again.
Ronin glares at the man. "You mean to think that I caused her to make me do this?" he says, pulling his shirt open and showing hsi scar from where he had killed himself. "And besides, she did that before I ever got a chane to be close to her." he says, retieing his shirt.
Inu looks at it, a look of pity briefly crossing his face, before being replaced by anger. "I don't know what you're playing at, boy, but I mean to find out. The first time... that was my fault. But after that... I should never have let her go back to the likes of you!" the "you" was sneered. He was still mad.
Ronin growls and stands up. "The likes of me?" he says with a slight laugh. "Did you know that when I first met her she hated all hanyou? Well? Did you?"
Inu looks him in the eyes. "I don't claim to be perfect. I screwed it up, so many times... but never this bad." With that, he flipped up into the trees, getting lost once more, wanting to be alone to wait for his daughter to return.
Ronin leaps after the man, chasing him as fast as he can, hoping that he in some way might have a clue as to where to look for Kor.
Inu whirls on the younger youkai. His eyes were wide in fear, fear and worry, and his breath came hard. "I know you have her! Or you know where she is!" he was becoming desprate. "Look, I won't, I'll leave you alone, alive, just return her to me, or give me her body if that's all you have, just please, I want my daughter... I won't persue you, if you just return her to me!"
Ronin stares at the hayou, long and hard before finally making a move. He reaches into his shirt. "I don't know where she is old man, maybe you should look at this." he says, pulling the note out and handing it to Inu. Ronin takes a step back and crosses his arms, waiting.
Inuyasha reads the note, then crumples it in his hand. His breath is shallow, fast, frantic. He tosses the note back, shutting his eyes, near tears but not allowing them to come, forcing them back... he turns away. "so you have stolen her love as well... is that the cause of her madness? Unrequited love?" he offers, his voice showing none of the emotion it held a moment ago.
Ronin picks the note up and smooths it out. He folds it and puts it back inside his shirt. "I returned her love, more than anyone before. In fact, she is the only one I ever loved." he says, his eyes downcast and his head hung. "That is, unless you count my mother."
Inu looks him over. " I see..." he says slowly, now a tad embarrased at his earlier outburst. He, too, hangs his head. "forgive me. I did not understand... no, don't bother. If you knew... you would not forgive me. I forgive you." With that, he begins to walk away, still fighting tears, thinking of how many times he's failed his daughter.
Ronin watches the man walk away, He sighs and thinks for a moment. "Wait!" he calls out after him. "Do you have any idea where I could look for her?" he asks, his voice sounds slightly more hopeful.
Inu shakes his head. "no. I havn't seen her... I don't know her well enough..." his voice becomes a little choked, but he stops, forcing himself to think of something else, anything else, to stop the tears from flowing until later, in private.
Ronin sighs and sits down, leaning against a tree. "Well, who told you about me?"
Inu bites his lip, sitting against another tree, head down to disguise the tears. "A little bird told me." he says, his voice thick with irony and sarcasm.
Ronin shoots a glare at Inu. "A little bird?" he says, thinking. "Would this happened to ahve been a little black bird? Or a little white bird?"
Inu snorts. "black, of course. A white brid wouldn't tell such lies... or are they lies?" he glares up at Ronin. "She said you were the cause of all this." It was a challange, defiant, daring him to deny it.
Ronin growls and stands up. "Damn woman, what did Kor ever do to her." he mutters under his breath. "No, I'm not the cause, that little black bird of yours is." he says, glancing towards Inu.
Inu frowns, a look that said clearly "I don't belive you." He snorts, and says only "feh. You all can take this whole mess and go to hell. Just give me my daughter back!"
"You think you're the only one who wants your daughter to come back? You do realize that I love her, dont you? That I want her back and safe with me, away from that human she ran off with, preferably all humans. But that can't be arranged. I just want her back....."
Inu looks him in the eye. "You have no idea what I've been through, boy. Losing her mother... and leaving her, the worst mistake I could ever make... and now, to lose her as well... it would finish me. I need her. She should be sheltered from the world, held, comforted, not forced into the world alone!" He remains calm, or calm as he has been anyway.
Ronin smiles grimly at Inu. "You want exactly what I want. For her to be safe. Away from harm."
Inu frowns, becoming frantic. "You don't understand! It's my fault, like her mother before her... I need to make it up to her. She needs to come HOME! And it's people like you who keep her away from me!"
Ronin growls and balls up his fists at his sides. "So...you want to take her away form me too?" he says, slowly, steadily becoming angrier.
Inu begins to growl. "She's not very happy with you, is she? If she's that unhappy, I don't give a damn what you want! She's coming HOME, where I can see to her and help her understand what she is! You said yourself she thinks she's a freak! I only want her to be happy! Is that so wrong?"
Ronin growls louder. "She thought she was a freak when I first met her. I helped her to realize what she is and how special that is. Something that you, apparently couldn't do."
Inu leaps up, angrily. "Don't tell me what I can and cannot do with my daughter! you know nothing! I wasn't there! It was my no-good friend and his wife who did this to her! I knew she shouldn't be left with a demon-hunter and a pervert, but I couldn't go against her mother!"
"Then don't go against her either. She loves me. You read the note. Didn't you see."
Inu snorts. "love... some love, that makes her so unhappy she'd die by her own hand! If you cared one whit about her, you'd let me take her home, where she belongs, where maybe she has a chance! But I see... your carnal instincts are more important than her life." he was being cruel and sarcastic, but he didn't care. This was Korunue's life, a chance to redeem Kagome...
Ronin steels himself, ready to jump on Inu. "My carnal instincts? Let me assure you, my carnal instincts have nothing to do with any of this."
Inu snorts. "sure. I belive you. So you'd let her die, then. You claim to care about her, but you won't help her. What DO you want with my daughter?" It was almost a challange, sarcastic and mean, as he tensed, claws ready.
Ronin snorts at INu. "I didn't let her die. I was knocked out. And when I woke up, she ahd already killed herslef. So I immediately followed."
Inuyasha meets his gaze. "nonesense. You're here now. I don't belive you. She can't be dead. She's not dead. She won't be dead when I find her. I refuse to bury my own daughter!" he was becoming frantic, desprate, eyes shifting about.
Ronin smiles weakly. "She's not dead anymore. Something stopped her, and me, from crossing over. I managed to get her to come back." he seems to relax a little.
Inu clenches his teeth in anger. "you lie! Korunue wouldn't do that! She's stubborn... if she wanted to die, truely wanted to, then she'd be dead by now." he tears at his hair in frustration, sinking to his knees. "Leave her alone! Leave me alone! Bring her back! She's mine, my daughter!"
"Well she did do it. There are others who saw it happen. "
Inu snarls, climbing to his feet. "What do you want with her! Why do you torment her so?! Why do you drive her to madness, and claim to love her! Why shouldn't I kill you now and bring her home myself? I can find her, no matter where you've hidden her!"
"I just want to be with her and be happy. I do love her. And if you kill me it will break her heart. Also, I haven't hidden her anywhere."
Inu continues to growl. "What would she do, kill herself?" it was a taunt, said mockingly. "I know my daughter better than to tell her I killed you. Better than some people!"
Ronin spits at Inu. "So you'd lie to her then? How does that make you any better?"
Inu growls. "I would save her, not kill her as you have done! While we bicker, she could be dying! I don't have TIME for this!" he turns and flees, not without a snarl at Sinai, who chose that moment to step into the clearing.
Ronin roars at the man. "Get back here!" he yells and sprints after him.
Inu whirls on the youngster, snarling. "Why are you following me?!" he says, looking fearsome. He is MAD now.
Ronin growls at the man. "Because, you are the only other one who cares for Kor as much as me. If even that much." the last part is said under is breath.
Inuyasha narrows his eyes, growling softly. "feh. and you would take her from me. You would rob me of the only comfort I have." He tries to look intimidating. "She's mine, my daughter, and you can't. have. her."
Ronin stands up straight and tall. "I can't? And you plan on stopping me?"
Inuyasha snarls, bending his knees slightly. "It was a mistake ever to let her out of my sight! After all those years, having her back... I was too lenient. I granted her anything, and she wanted freedom. I should have known something like this would happen! And now she's fallen in with a bad crowd, and it's driving her mad! Leave her alone!"
Ronin snarls at Inuyasha. "A bad crowd? You're the one that let her run with that human. That human and that damn bird friend of yours are the only bad ones she has been around."
Inuyasha snorts. "My 'Friend' as you call it was the one to inform me that my daughter was trying to kill herself repeatedly! Who's fault is THAT, mind you? You've been with her constantly..." this said challangeingly, tauntingly. "That human hasn't done anything to her."
"That human would have helped Kor kill herself if Kor had asked her. Your friend is the one hurting her. How many times do I have to explain that to you."
Inuyasha growls. "sure. Mm-hmm. So the reason her friend set up a net to catch her and your souls then is..." where was he getting this information?! Did it matter? Maybe it was his beloved's spirit, helping him save their daughter... he almost broke down in tears right there, but he composed himself.
"A net? What net? All I know is that she hadn't gone to the other side by the time I found her. She came back because of me. Not because of the efforts of anyone else, but because of ME!!!"
Inuyasha sneers. "or so you think. A wall of some sort, or some obstruction in your path?" Where... that bird! Behind Ronin! A dove, snow-white, but the same unnatural size as the other... perhaps this bird was telling him this? He knew this was right almost instantly. "Something to keep her there long enough for her to come back?"
Ronin thinks back. "Perhaps, but she wanted to stay, find a way around it. She came back because I was there." What is that hanyou looking at? Something behind him. Ronin glances back for a second, keeping his ears trained on Inu. "You!"
The bird stares back at him. I sense my presence is not wanted here. My si... the demon sleeps. She will do nothing for the time being. With that, the bird flew off, saying quickly Remember my name: Psiona. Call if there is need.
Ronin turns back to Inu. "That bird is a good one. The black one is evil. And I believe it has tried to hurt Kor before."
Inuyasha growls, having caught the last part but not the first. So it WASN'T Kagome. He felt almost cheated. "I thank you for saving my baby. Now leave us the hell alone! There is a curse, I think... that damned woman, perhaps even from the grave... perhaps the black bird is her in some new form. But this is a family matter, and I thank you to STAY OUT OF IT!"
" STAY OUT OF WHAT? She is as much a part of my life as yours, maybe even more a part of mine. And curse or no, I'm gonna find her."
Inuyasha looked into his eyes, fuming silently. "Listen to me! She is my daughter, and this is my fault, and I aim to correct it. We don't need your help! Some help, when she managed to die so easily! She would never do a thing like that in MY household!"
"Shes your daughter, and I LOVE HER! Get that through your thick skull. I love her. I'll do anything I can to get to her and help her. Besides, I think you do need my help. "
Inuyasha stared at him for a good while. "She's too young to love. She is her mother's daughter, and look where love got her!" His breath came ragged and deep, as if he was about to cry any second now. His anger faded. He swallowed, hard, closing his eyes. "look where love got me... forget love."
Ronin stares back. "Funny thing that, love is the only thing keeping me going now."
Inuyasha looks away, opening his eyes. "Far be it for me to take that from you... trust me. Love fades, over time. You think you love her, and then... you are betrayed, and then... love turns too quickly to hatred. Love to hatred, and then new love, and their love turns to jealousy..." he trails off, remembering... it was painful to remember.
Ronin shrugs his shoulders. "Then, if my love fades, I have nothing to live for. I'll kill myself...again."
Inuyasha shuts his eyes, shrugging slightly. "You'll find something... I thuoght I had no reason to go on, without my beloved... and without even Korunue... but look at me now. 15 years of utter lonliness, without a single soul to talk to... no wonder I did so badly by Korunue."
Ronin looks away from Inu and sighs. He sits down under a tree. "What is your name, Kor never told me much about you." He looks over towards Inu and sighs again.
Inuyasha sits, slowly. "My name? Inuyasha. I am an inu hanyou, as you can tell... I am never sure what to say about my age. Korunue is my only child, the only child of me and my beloved..." he snorts, a little, at his own words. "My new beloved, anyways."
Ronin nods thoughtfully. "I'm Ronin, a kitsune hanyou. And Kor is the only one I have ever loved. Without her I have nothing."
Inuyasha sighs. "I thought I loved Kikyo..." just the name... so many emotions... "no. I loved her. I did! I really did! We were tricked... she shot me... i didn't die... I was pinned to a tree for a long while... she had died... Ka.. Kor's mother freed me. We went on a quest together... but Kikyo was a vengeful Miko ghost by then. Korunue's mother was her reincarnation."
Ronin sighs. "Maybe us hanyou arent meant to be happy."
Inuyasha glares at Ronin. "no! I refuse to belive that! It can't be some effect of mixing the blood! Korunue WILL have her happy ending! She will!" he sounds like a small child protesting, trying to make the world act the way he wanted. "She won't end up like Ka... her mother." he knows saying the name will make him lose it, right there.
Ronin smiles a little. "Kor isnt a hanyou. She is an ikkiyou, and I will make her happy. I'll guarantee her happy ending."
Inuyasha frowns, saying nothing. he sighs. "feh" he says softly, weary and sad.
Ronin sighs and leans his head back. "What can I do? How can I find her?" he asks himself.
Suddanly, a human girl pops up behind the two Hanyo's "Hello! Why the glum faces?"
Inuyasha snarls, hating being caught in a vaulnerable moment. "Leave me alone! all of you!"
Ronin growls at whoever it is. "Why should I tell you, its not like its any of your business."
The girl blinks "Geez, no need to snap at me. I was just curious." She 'humph's and turns her back on the two.
Ronin sighs and leans up against the tree, like he is going to take a catnap, nothing better to do.
Inuyasha snarls in the girl's face, then growls at Ronin. "Some help! If I find her body, so help me... " he threatens, then races off, bristling and snarling.
Ronin doesnt respond, he really did fall asleep. Must still be tired from Rhys's spell
The sound of a horse's slow hooves is heard. A horse plods through the forest, not far from Ronin. It holds two women as it's riders: Aldrea and a strange woman. The stranger wears a long, baggy black cloak with a hood, covering her head and shading her face. She has a vail on under it, the kind made to show off sexy eyes. But her eyes were sad, and purple. She smelled like flowers, even to a youkai's nose; she rode with her head bowed.
Ronin sniffs the air in his sleep and his ears perk up. He sits up a little to get a look at the horse. Seems to be that human, and someone else. He jumps up and runs towards the human. "What have you done with her?" he yells.
Aldrea merely looks at him. She looks sad and worn out. She sighs, urging the horse on... but the woman in back coughs, slightly. She turns, intent on hearing what she had to say... the woman murmered something softly. "My friend would speak with you... she says you remind her of her old boyfriend." says Aldrea. She turns to the woman. "I'll be at the inn." she murmers, tenderly, as the woman dismounts and Aldrea rides on.
Ronin runs a little ways after the horse, but stops and turns back. He stares at the woman and sniffs the air. "What do you want? Cant you see I needed to speak to her?" he says, jerking his head towards the direction Aldrea had gone.
The stranger bows her head. "gomen ne." she says, in perfect japanese. She sounds slightly familier... yet, her voice was different. No part of her form showed beneath the garments. She looks remorseful, humble. "I would like some advice... you seem like my old boyfriend."
Ronin sighs. "Well what about your boyfriend? I'm not exactly having the best time with relationships right now. My beloved has run off, and Im trying to find her."
The woman looks up, a little interested. "I, too, left... I hurt my boyfriend so badly... I don't know if he can ever forgive me. I cannot decide what to do: to die alone, without seeing him, or to beg him to take me back, beg his forgiveness, before I die. Or to come in secret, to gaze upon him once more, one last time..." she lowers her eyes once more.
"I'm sure he would forgive you. If he loves you. I would certainly forgive my beloved if she came back to me." Ronin looks over his shoulder as if expecting her to come running up any second.
The woman keeps looking down. "but... I hurt him so badly... hurts like that arn't easily forgiven. My father... the reason he was with my mother was that he and his first love never made up after she hurt him, and she died. Perhaps, if I die alone, away from him, he will be better off..." She says this softly, timidly, as though she was ashamed to even be talking to him.
Ronin stares for a moment. Her father...no, it couldn't be. "If he loves you, it doesn't matter how big the hurt is. And if he loves you, then you dying alone would do nothing mroe than hurt him."
The stranger looks down still, calm, reasonable, timid. "But I might hurt him again... nay, I will hurt him again. I am something unnatural... he can't bear it, I can't bear it... perhaps I should just die. but I am weak... I want to see him again... but he would never let me go..." she sounds weary, broken in spirit.
Ronin steps up to the woman. "So you love him don't you, and he loves you. You can't hurt him. Your love protects him. Even if you are weak, or unnatural."
The woman sighs. "but I have hurt him, so many times... almost driving him to his death... I DID drive him to death, but he survived... I can't bear losing him... and death seems sweeter and sweeter all the time..." a small black cat comes and rubs against her legs, and she kneels to hug it. It glares at Ronin, green eyes full of malice for an instant, gone instantly.
Ronin has a hunch now, this is too much coincidence, but should he act on it? "He can't bear losing you, I'm sure. In fact, I'm willing to bet he's depressed right now without you."
Korunue-for, just as Ronin suspected, it was she whom he was talking to, in disguise- wonders... can he suspect? No. She stands. "I.. I should go. I'm sorry I took up your time with my petty worries... if I am to die I should get to it." She makes no move to go, scooping the cat up into her arms.
Ronin sighs. "Do me a favor. If you see a girl, with black hair, and puppy dog ears. Tell her that I'm looking for her. Tell her that I can't go on without her. Tell her that I love her, and if I find her dead then I will kill myself....again."
Korunue looks down. Could he... no. Well, she'd just make sure he didn't find her body... maybe drowning? She had seen him one last time, and that was good. Now, to die. She saw a white cat leap onto Ronin's shoulder, but ignored it, as it hissed at her cat. She bowed her head and turned to leave, not replying to his words.
Ronin picks the cat up and sets it down. "Not now." he says to it. Quickly he reaches out and places a hand on her shoulder and spins her around. "Tell her for me, ok. Please..." he says, staring into her eyes, they seem so familiar. His eyes are watering now, showing all his hope and love being poured into this message.
Korunue can't take it.. no. She has to be strong... for Ronin... She looks down. "As I am to die soon, I doubt I will see her... dog ears arn't common around here, you know..."
Ronin sighs again. "You can look, dog ears will pick up a message if it is spread far enough. Thats all I ask, tell her, or tell someone to look for her." He takes his hand off of her shoulder and it simply falls to his side, his head is hung, and his ears drooping. He looks thinner, not as strong as he usualy does. Exhausted even.
Korunue's heart breaks to see him such... "I will tell her, if I see her, though I doubt it will do much good... and remember, if you havn't seen her you don't know if she's dead... she may not perish..." she murmers, putting a hand on his shoulder.
Ronin looks up at her and the tears in his eyes are apparent. He can't take it anymore and falls to his knees, sobbing.
Korunue kneels, almost crying herself... she puts an arm around him, a familier guesture... she bites her lip, thinking, breathing deep, as she had learned would stop the tears from coming... she shut her eyes, however.
Ronin shudders and mumbles something under his breath. The only word that is intelligible is Kor. His ears are drooping as low as possible and his whole body is shaking as he breathes and sobs.
Korunue breathes deeply, rapidly. She can't take it... no. She is strong. She ignores his words... they cause only pain. She keeps her eyes closed. "she loves you" she whispers in his ear, then stands up, spying the cat once more. She takes a deep breath, then another... not much longer, now, then she'll be beyond all pain.
Ronin looks up at the woman. "I know she loves me, but...she thinks it can help me if she goes away. If I never see her again...well, I'll make it so I can see her, I've got more than enough daggers to do the job."
Korunue gasps, turning pale as she faces away from him. She tries to stifle it... then she turns back to him, willing herself not to cry, not to cry, she'd be beaten if she cried... "is that what she would want?" she asks softly, her hood falling off as she turns back. Night-black hair... elven ears. Purple eyes... her lower face was covered by her veil still. A slight jangling was heard, coming from a small, silver bracelet on her left wrist that glinted a little from the opening of her cloak. It was hidden, but it was there.
Ronin stares at her hair, for a moment he thinks it is Kor, the he notices the ears and sighs. "I don't think she would want me to kill myself, just like I don't want her to kill herself." He starts to cry again, unable to really stop now that he has started. All hte anguish from the past few days is finally getting out of him.
Korunue says, softly, almost under her breath, "oh Ronin!". She says it tenderly... then remembers... "Well, then... don't. Don't die... she wouldn't want you to. She might have reasons for dying, wholly seperate from you... and she would want you to live."
Ronin almost stops crying, tears still stream down a little though. He stares at the woman strangely. "You know something....you've talked to her haven't you?" his voice is getting louder and he seems to be getting over his crying spell.
Korunue pales. He knew! no. he didn't. But she couldn't lie to him... well, she didnt' talk to herself. "no." that was easy. She prayed he wouldn't question her further... or get mad at her... well, if he was mad, she'd challenge him, and lose... no. That would destroy him, when the charm failed.
"Where is she? Where did you last see her? Tell me!!!!"
Korunue looks down. "I told you, I havn't spoken to her." She had seen herself, of course, and knew herself... she prayed silently that he would not force her to reveal herself...
Ronin frowns, the disappointment on his face easy to see. "I guess Aldrea told you." he says, sinking back down to the ground. "Kor, where are you?" he says to noone in particular, tears welling up in his eyes again.
Korunue almost answers... then stops herself. She was not Kor at the moment, she was a stranger, she wanted one last look, and she got it, and she deservs it, she deserves to see how much pain he was in because of her, how much he would be crushed when he found out she was dead... "this badly. I hurt him this badly... he can never truely forgive me." she murmered to herself.
Ronin perks up a little and stares at the woman. "What did you say?" he says before curling up into a little ball.
Korunue looks down, torn between wanting to comfort him and not wanting to hurt him. She sighs, smiling a little at him, a sympathy smile, in no way mocking or making light of his torment. The white cat comes and rubs on him, trying to comfort him, and Kor feels almost jealous... but if she did anything, he'd know... and he can never know. Never. That much was clear. "come on, you have to be strong, for her sake..." she says, gently, comforting him as best she can without giving herself away.
Ronin sighs. "What good will it do. I was always storng, and look where it got me. I....I can't go on anymore. Not without her." he says shaking a little.
Korunue closes her eyes, unable to stand it. She kneels, to comfort him, placing an arm around him. "you have to belive... belive that she will come back." she whispers to him, softly.
Ronin shakes her arm off. "Don't even try. Kor is the only one who can help me. And she has run off.... KOR!!!! WHY??? WHY WHY WHY???" he yalls out huddling on the ground, shaking and sobbing.
Korunue takes a deep breath, struggling to breathe... "don't... I can't... Please..." she stands up. She had to go... she couldn't take this any longer. To reveal herself, or to die? No. If she revealed herself... he'd hate her, hate that she tricked him, hate that she didn't come forth sooner... it was too late for that. The white cat glared at her, then lept at her left hand. The black one attacked it, but it was too late: the clasp on her bracelet had come undone. She stood there a moment only, pale-faced, as her elven ears vanished and puppy ears replaced them. She now smelled like her old self, rather then flowers. She then turned and fled, as fast as she could. She had a black eye, and she favored her left foot a little as she ran, as if trying to hide that it was in pain. She plunged deep into the forest, panicked.
Ronin jumps up "Kor!!! Kor, come back!" he screams, running after her. "Please Kor, please." he pleads as he runs, tears welling in his eyes. "Kor! I love you, I forgive you. Please come back!" He trips over a tree root and gets the wind knocked out of him. He lays there, gasping for breath. "Kor..." he says weakley, reaching towards where he last saw her.
Korunue continues to run, noting that the black cat was now bouding beside her. She pulled a dagger from her cloak, tears streaming silently down her face. She then tossed it aside, running still. Her blood would alert him to her whereabouts.. he would stop her. She changed her course, heading for water. Unknown to her, the white cat bounded to Ronin, becoming a large white horse with a golden mane quicker than thought.come on then! she urged, motioning with her head for him to hop on.
Ronin groans and hauls himself up, leaning down next to the horses head. "Alright, lets go."
Korunue finds a small, shallow stream. Too shallow... but, at some unknown urging, she ran in it, to throw off persuit. She follows its course, though she knew not to where. The horse, carrying Ronin, gets a trace on her sister's mind and speeds off through the forest, taking a few shortcuts. Korunue reaches a lake, and knows why she had followed the stream. It was perfect! She tears a strip from the bottom of her clothes and shoves it in her mouth, tying it with her left sleeve, and jumped into the water, shutting her eyes and curling into a ball. No good, she was floating! She breaks the surface, as the horse arrived at the other side of the lake. She dives quickly, tying her right sleeve (torn off) to her right ankle and pinning it beneath a rock to hold her down. Her lungs hurt... she was getting dizzy...
Ronin leaps off the horse and into the lake. "KOR!!!" he screams as he jumps. He swims crazily towards Korunue. Finally he reaches with her, pulling her ankle from under the rock and pulling The cloth out of her mouth. He swims towards the surface, hauling Kor with him. He gasps for air as he breaks the surface and swims towards shore, his arm wrapped firmly around Korunue's waist. "Kor..." he says, laying her on her back on the shore. "Kor, speak to me."
Korunue groans, coughing a little. "damn you." she croaks, without much conviction. She keeps her eyes shut, not wanting to face him.. she hadn't been fast enough, he had been too fast, she should have run faster, she was part youkai, she can outrun him given a lead, she should have stuck with the dagger... she says none of this.
Ronin smiles with relief. "Kor, you're alright." he says, gathering her up in his arms and hugging her. "I missed you Kor." he gives her a kiss. "Kor...I love you, don't you realize that. You saw what I'm like without you."
Korunue does not say a word, the tears streaming down her face, her breath coming in raggad gasps. She bites her lip, then turns her head so she was facing away from him. She tries to stop the tears, but cannot. She focuses on that to take her mind off the pain she feels inside.
"Kor, look at me. Kor, I love you. Talk to me, please."
Korunue looks back, her purple eyes full of pain and torment. One was puffy and black and blue, swollen muchly, but it still held pain. "I love you too" she whispers, not trusting her voice. "oh, Ronin..."
Ronin gives Korunue another hug. "Kor, what happened to you. Who did this to you?" he says running his fingers through her hair and hugging her.
Korunue shakes her head. Then she thinks better of it. Why NOT tell him? "The sisters... at the convent. No, that's not right... they came from there, but I was in a... madhouse." She sobs silently, remembering... she hugs him back, taking what small comfort she can. "I.. I don't want to hurt you anymore, Ronin. I would kill the one who hurts my beloved."
Ronin places his hand on the back of her head and sighs. "As I will kill whoever it is that hurt you. Now Kor, explain it to me, please."
Korunue closes her eyes, smiling a little, behind his back. "don't you see? Everything I do... it all hurts you. Everything is wrong." she cannot finish her words, a lump rising in her throat. She forces back the tears... she is not weak. No. Strong enough to die... a weakling would have backed out ages ago. Wait.. since when did SHE care about strength? She did not notice the black cat grooming itself by the lake, at the the tree line.
Ronin kisses Kor again. "You gave me a good reason to keep on going. Something is causing this. It isn't you. What about that black cat/bird/woman. She always seems to be around when something goes bad."
The cat abrubtly turns and vanishes into the forest. The white horse sees this, turning to a bird and chasing after her. Korunue pulls away to look at them across the lake... "you were fine before me. I wasn't." she says, softly, looking at the scenery.
"Kor, you don't know anythign about me before I met you. You want to know what I was like before I met you? I was a drifter, wandering around the woods. Hunting my food down. Camping in the woods. I had nowhere to call home, Nowhere to be. No real reason to be alive."
Korunue frowns. "but you were... I, too, was alone. If it wern't for my dad, I'd be dead. I failed my mother... I don't know how or why he woke, but he did, and saved me. But I'd have eluded him eventually... I should have died while away, but... I wanted to see you, one last time." She looked off in the distence, away from him.
"I don't think your dad likes me."
Korunue snorts. "I don't think he likes anyone, save me. I think... well, he preferred being alone. I had a hard time finding him. He... he was alone, for 15 years, without anyone to talk to... I heard he was a loner before I was born, too." she explains, gently. "But... when did you meet him?"
Ronin nods. "He found me right after I read your note. Said that I was the reason you wanted to kill yourself. Also said that it was that little black bird that told him." He squeezes Korunue again. "Kor, can't we just go back to the way thigns were before Rhys got me?"
Korunue looks off, thinking, for some time. She turns back, her eyes sad and trusting. "I don't think... I mean... well, surely you remember... I havn't been the same since... since I failed my mother." This is hard for her to say, but she trusts him utterly.
Ronin kisses Korunue again. "Kor, I still love you anyways. Just stay with me always, please?"
Korunue looks at him, torn. "always...." she tries the word out, softly. "But... what if I hurt you again? What if... what if... what if you found out all my secrets, and hated me for it?" she murmers, softly, doubting.
Ronin smiles softly at Korunue. "Kor, I don't care what your secrets are, I couldn't hate you for them. Just be with me."
Korunue looks pained. "What if I get mad? Bad things happen when I get mad... what if they happened to you? What if I tried to...." she can't say it. A thousand possibilites stream through her head, none of them good.
Ronin gathers Korunue up in his arms, cradling her like a baby with an arm under her knees and the other supporting her head. "Bad things happen when I get mad too Kor." he says softly, sighing.
Korunue shakes her head. "you don't understand! When I get mad... sometimes, I black out, and come to to find myself trying to kill the person standing closest to me, or them trying to kill me... or sometimes I lose it, and start to glow, and strange things happen to people who get in my way... "she urges him to understand...
Ronin squeezes Kor. "I don't care, even if you do attack me. I'll still love you."
Korunue looks... odd. "you say that now, but you never know... my father thought the same about some woman, until he actually WAS betrayed by her, and then he hated her and fell in love with her reincarnation, my mother." The pain... she can barely stand it. She looks out at the lake in longing.
"You still love me, even after what I did. Why wouldn't I love you. You are the only person in the world I care about."
Korunue sobs, the dam breaking, all the held back tears coming now. In her greif and pain, she was helpless to do anything but cuddle against him and sob.
Ronin kisses Korunue, a long lingering kiss. "Kor, It's alright. Everything will be fine."
Korunue cries harder. "no... no it won't..." she fights for composure. "if you but command it of me, I will stay here... stay for you, and you alone, though I may be miserable." She means it, too. She wouldn't cause him pain for anything... even if he lived, she wouldn't want him to be alone... yet she silently prays that he will not force her to stay alive.
Ronin is bewildered by Korunue's comment. "Kor, do you mean that you don't love me." Tears start to well up in his eyes now, leftovers from earlier.
Korunue shakes her head, agast. "no! That's not it... I just... can't you see how much I love you? It hurts me to stay, knowing I'm a failure, knowing i'll never have true friends, save you, Ally, and Sinai... knowing that I will hurt you over and over, and that I can't help it... it's too much for me. And yet... if you want, if it would make you happy... for you, i'd put up with it. I've decided... it's worth the pain, to have you... i forget that, sometimes, but if you command..."
Ronin hugs Korunue. "I'm not going command you to do anything. Just know that without you, I've got more than enough daggers to do what I would need done." He leans down and kisses her cheek. "You're my only friend." He had a strange urge to kill himself, here and now. Korunue couldn't possibly know how much she was hurting him. There would be no net this time, to stop them... sweet release.
Korunue shuts her eyes, the tears flowing silently, less violently now. "no... I can never forgive myself... the way you looked, back there... I almost revealed myself, or ended it then and there... If that ever happens again...." she can picture it, and she doesn't like it. Understatement of the year. She gasps for breath. "don't do it, Ronin... I love you... I'll stay for you. I will. I won't go near a dagger, won't drown myself... no matter how much it hurts..."
Ronin kisses Korunue. "Kor, just love me." He gives her a hug, and squeezes tight, not letting go for a long time.
Korunue goes limp in his arms, just being, not thinking, trying not to feel... pain. All there was: love and pain. Life and death, food and hunger, all else where nothing before these two powerfull forces. She chose love... and so chose pain. She had thought love would end pain... she was wrong.
Ronin stares at Kor as she goes limp "Kor...?" he asks slowly.
Korunue gives up her struggle. "I'm fine..." she says, leaning against him. "I'm sorry... " she isn't sure what to say. What CAN she say? Nothing. She shuts her eyes, concentrating on the feel of the wind in her hair, of the feeling of hunger she has been blocking out for so long, on the feeling of cold on her skin, on breathing, on her heartbeat, and on his...
Ronin nuzzles Kor's neck. "You know something, your father was worried that I had ruined you. That it was my fault that everything happened. He thinks I'm here to steal you away from him."
Korunue smiles a little. "I'm not suprised... he cares about me..." she ignores the implications, trying to find some good in this.
Ronin lays down on the ground and looks up. "Kor, I don't know what to do." He seems to be hinting at the fact that Korunue doesn't seem to be too enthusiastic about anything to do with him.
Korunue snuggles next to him, picking up on the hint. "What do you want me to do? Get mad at father? I dunno... maybe I make myself sad so I won't get mad and hurt people... or maybe I belong in a madhouse, where they put me..." she sounds like she belives it, like the latter is correct, but she doesn't want him to become angry with her for thinking it.
Ronin looks over at Kor. "I feel like a failure.Maybe your dad was right."
Korunue looks at him, shocked. "why?" she asks, urgently. "you did nothing wrong!" She shakes her head. "no. And you know it! It wasn't your fault! Never you... it was my own weakness. that's all."
Ronin shakes his head. "It's not your fault. It's mine. I'm weaker than I make myself out to be. Just look at how I was earlier....weak."
Korunue shakes her head, sitting up. "no. Weak, perhaps... but not the cause of this! You're the reason I'm alive, not the reason I wanted to be dead! You saved me... you didn't kill me. It was always my hand on the dagger, my thoughts that drove me to it, my own fears that led to this pain. Not you. Never you."
"I'm weak...Kor, I've been thinking about killing myself the whole time we've been talking. I know you want to die, why should I live? I'm just a failure."
Korunue turns pale, looking positivly shocked. "Ronin..." she murmers, pulling him close to her. "I'm sorry... I'll never forgive myself. And how can you ever forgive me, if I can't forgive myself? This is why i almost didn't come back..." it is hard for her to breathe all of the sudden. She shuts her eyes... it hurt. A LOT.
Ronin hugs Korunue and kisses her. "I forgave you before you came back. It's not your fault, it's mine."
Korunue kisses Ronin. "No. I told you! The only reason I waited, I paused to make sure, was you! I... but what's the point?! I know perfectly well that nothing I say will make the slightest difference... Must fate always be so cruel? To tear from me every comfort? Without you... I can't say I will have no-one. But... When I remember the look on Sinai's face when we died... it hurts a million times less than when I remember..."
Ronin faces Korunue and wraps his arms around her. "Oh Kor... Just stay with me" He stares straight into her eyes, his face inches from hers.
Korunue smiles, a little half-smile. "how can I say no?" she whispers, then kisses him, slowly, passionatly. How she loved him! Everything seemed right, for just a little bit... it was enough, though she knew it wouldn't last. It never did.
Ronin kisses Korunue back with equal passion. "I love you Kor."
Korunue smiles. "I love you too." The haunted look re-appears in her eyes, though... the look of pain, of being eternally wounded. She makes no other sign of her worry.
Ronin smiles happiily and rubs his nose against Korunue's. He doesnt notice her eyes. "I wish we could stay like this forever."
Korunue smiles. "as long as we both shall live, right? Isn't that how it goes? Forever... what a fleeting concept." She doesn't look as happy as him, though she is happy, certainly... and sad, all at once
Ronin kisses her again. "What should we do now?" he asks after a few moments.
Korunue thinks for a second... then smiles sheepishly. "you know, I havn't the slightest idea. I fully expected to be dead now..." doh! once again, she has said the wrong thing. She winces slightly, her ears drooping. "er... i mean..." but she meant it. She can't lie to him. She offers no explination.
"But you arent dead. You're here with me. And I dont know what to do."
Korunue smiles, a weary smile. "that's true... I am. And I don't know either... the man is supposed to be in charge."
Ronin blinks at Korunue. "And what is that supposed to mean?"
Korunue shrugs. "I learned it while away... the nuns said maybe I could be saved, but I had to change, be more submissive, more timid and respectful... " she says this slightly bitterly, remembering what else they told her... "not that I have any chance of going to heaven anyway..."
Ronin kisses Korunue again. "I don't like the sound of these nuns." he says in between kisses. "Maybe I should go kill htem all" he says, playfully.
Korunue smiles, a little. "no, don't do that. Then you'd go to hell too... there's a chance, they say, since you didn't know killing yourself was a sin... you can be forgiven. But if you try it again, once you know..."she trails off, remembering the lake... her smile fades.
Ronin kisses her more. "Bah, forget the nuns, what do they know?"
Korunue looks sad, returning all his kisses. "a lot, actually..." she says, then smiles a little. "but I much prefer you to them anyday." she says, kissing him afterwords. Then her stomach growls, though she ignores it.
"You sound like you're hungry. How long has it been since you've eaten anything. Of course, we don't have to eat, we could just lay here and kiss."
Korunue smiles. "either... I had food this morn, before leaving... the normal rations, or normal for me as late. The past few weeks, anyways, in... that place." She doesn't elaborate.
Ronin grins and kisses Korunue some more, not saying anything else.
Korunue returns his kisses, passionatly, though her mind is elsewhere, on his earlier words... she pulls away, searching his eyes. How... a zillion questions. How could he think that? How could he say that? How could he ever doubt her? Her eyes hold internal pain. She takes a deep breath. "give me your daggers. All of them." She asks, silently begging him to comply.
Ronin pulls back and stares at Korunue warily. "My daggers?" HE thinks about it a moment and decides she will not try anything, not with him here. "Alright." He reaches into his shirt and pulls out 2 of the daggers, then crosses his arms and reaches up his sleeves, pulling out the other two. "Here Kor." he says, handing the daggers to her, hilt first.
Korunue takes the hilts, examining the top one carefully... she runs a finger down the flat of the blade, cradling the hilt. She kisses the hilt, then, with a flick of her wrist, the dagger flew into the lake. The others followed, flick-flick-flick, then gulp-gulp-gulp as the lake swallowed them. Her eyes stayed on the lake where they dissapeared.
Ronin groans as the daggers fly away. "Kor! I might have needed those in a fight."
Korunue remains fixated on the lake. "then don't get in any fights." she says, in a monotone voice, not really paying attention to him. She forced her muscles to obey, not to dive after them... "besides, you have your swords."
Ronin nods slowly "That I do." he leans forwards and kisses her again. "Now what shall we do?"
Korunue is brought back to earth by his kiss, smiling a little. She tears herself away from the lake, though her ears stay on it. She tries to concentrate... she had promised, after all. She promised... she promised... "I don't know..." Die? the answer was ready on her lips, but she forced her tounge still.
Ronin sighs and wrpas his arms around Korunue, pulling her close. "I'm sorry Kor. I'm sorry for the way I acted. I was under a spell, and I don't remember it. But I'm still sorry. Will you forgive me?"
Korunue looks down. "Of course. I forgave you long ago..." she says, sounding faintly suprised at his words. She keeps her ears on the lake, though. She meets his eyes. "It's not you.... it's all me now. My own personal demons..." A large black bird hops onto her shoulder, eyeing Ronin. it's eyes look a tad too intelligent...
Ronin reaches out and grabs the bird. "Stupid bird." he snarls, squeezing his fist."You're the one causing all of this."
Korunue jerks up. "no, no... she's alright, really. That's just Jenny. She's my friend... she gives me advice sometimes. Let her go... crows can see the future, you know." The bird eyed him, looking no less dignified in his grasp than she had on Kor's shoulder.
Ronin snorts "Jenny, bah!" This bird is always around when something bad happens, I've see it almost every time." he says, moving his hand up to the birds neck and sueezing harder.
Korunue stiffens, biting her lip. She has a blinding headache.... "let her go..." she says softly. A soft voice laughs in his head. yes, let her go... I wouldn't want to have to break your hand enlarging myself... much more fun to give it a push, just there, in her mind, driving her over the edge into madness forever... more satisfying indeed.
Ronin blinks at looks around himself quickly. He finally realizes the voice was inside his head and stares at the bird. "Make no mistake demon, I'll get you one day." he says releasing the brid from his grip.
Korunue relaxes as the pressure releases. I'm sure you will the voice mocks, cackling. It says something entirely different to Korunue, and she nods solumnly. It was true... she was hurting him... she would have to keep an eye on him all the time. She can't take away his sword, he is prone to fights.. but she will not let him go without a fight, no matter HOW worn out she gets. The bird returns to her shoulder, and she strokes its back.
Ronin glares at the bird. "It's not your friend Kor. It's always around when trouble stars, haven't you noticed?"
Korunue looks at the bird, listening. "that's because... that's because when I'm sad and lonely, my heart cries out, and she can't help but come to comfort me." She looks up, as a white bird lands on Ronin's shoulder. "oh, who's that, Jenny? One of your friends?" the new bird snickers in Ronin's mind, and the black one glares at it.
Ronin looks at the new bird and turns his glare back to the black one. "Oh hell.Look, can't you and blackie over there just settle your differences without me and Kor?"
Korunue looks puzzled, as the two birds hop onto the ground, becoming two women. They were identicle in build. One has heavenly blond hair and light golden wings, with a light green skin tone and a simple white dress. She had been the white bird. The other has purple skin, and curly wild brown hair, with black wings. She looks menicing, and the other looks sweet. They glare at each other. "No. She has chosen her victem.I am simply defending life and love." says the golden one. "NOT TRUE! Kor, I want to help you, really! She's interfering! She wants Ronin to die!" says the other. Korunue looks aghast. She looks from one to the other, pale, scared. She shuts her eyes, trembling a little. "who ARE you?" she asks softly, leaning against Ronin.
Ronin puts his arms around Korunue and pulls her close, strokking her hair. "It's alright Kor." He looks the two women over. "Why do't you both go away then, and leave us out of it."
The darker looks at Korunue, smiling a little. "Is that what you want, Kor? For me to go away? I will, if you want. I can retreat to the treetops and watch from there. I just want to make sure you know you have options." The white one frowned. "What IS your game, miss 'ooh! I scored a double! I got both of them in one! Wanna see me try for a triple?'" the mocking tone was perfect. Kor kept her eyes shut, thinking.
Ronin pulls Korunue closer. "Kor..." he whispers to her. "Just get rid of them." he keeps holding Korunue as he listens to the two women.
Korunue opens her eyes. "Leave... for a while. Give me time! time! If I want you, I'll call to you. But leave me be for the while." The pair growl at each other, turning into a black dog and a white dog, then to wolves, the white chasing the black into the forest. Korunue leans on Ronin, yawning a little. "did I do right?" she asks sleepily. But she is alseep before the answer came.
****************************
Korunue awoke. Her ankles hurt- they had been badly rope-burned. She looked at the lake, still cold as it was early in spring, and decided why not? She sneaks up, and heads to a shallow shelf on the lake shore. It had maybe a few inches of water in it- perfect. She steps in, her ankles going numb. Ah... how lovely. She bends down to swish her hands in the water. A swim would feel nice... and what could it hurt? The lake looked so calm and peaceful, it might ease her pain a little as it had the pain in her ankles. Yes, how lovely- a nice swim. She strips off her cloak, now sleevless, and wears only the remains of a straightjacket sans arms underneath. She heads to the edge of the shelf and dives in. The first thing that hit her was that the water was COLD. The second was that she didn't care. Underwater, it was so peaceful, so calm... she wanted to stay down there forever. So like death it was... she reached the bottom and almost laughed for glee. She ran her fingers through the sand, enjoying the feel of it. Then, her finger stung- she had hit something sharp.
The pain... the pain invading her peacefulness broke it. She realized she wasn't breathing, that she was cold, and that her lungs were on fire. She clutched the object and shot towards the surface.
Sinai happened to be walking along in the forest, and she came upon the lake then. Seeing Ronin, she wondered where Korunue was. Korunue broke the surface, and Sinai gasped. Was she crazy, swimming this early in the year? She called out to her, and Korunue swam over to the shore. Sinai drapes Korunue's cloak about her.
They sat there talking for a long while, about what had happened with Sinai. Korunue finally got up the courage to speak. After all, Sinai had just finished telling her how she had been betrayed by one she trusted...
"Sinai?" she asks, timidly.
"Yes? 'm sorry, I've been rambling on, I shoulda let yea talk."
Truth time. Korunue takes a deep breath, closing her eyes. "I... I tried to drown myself yesterday. And... I tried to kill myself several times while I was away. And just now, in the lake... I almost didn't want to come up. I... No matter what happens... it just gets worse... oh, Sinai..."
Sinai pulls Korunue into her arms to comfort her, holding her tight, feeling for her truly. "Oh, Korunue..."
Korunue sobs onto her friend's shoulder. "I don't know why... I just... everything about life hurts... I hurt or let down everyone I get close to.... you should have seen Ronin.... I hurt him so badly..." she murmers, trying to explain.... "And I hurt you, when I died..."
Sinai pulls back and looks her in the eyes, holding either side of her head gently. "It did hurt, but because I love you, Korunue. Ye're m' best friend. It would kill m' tae lose ye. But I would move on. I hate to say that, but I would keep you alive in my heart if you were to die. Your memory would make me smile. But...That doesn't mean you should kill yourself."
Korunue closes her eyes gently, breathing deeply. "I... I don't want to hurt people. I... I... I gave my word to Ronin... but... no. I can't break my word. No matter how much it hurts... no matter how much... unless he releases me from it. And he won't. I won't ask him to. It would kill him... literally...."
"But ye dinna hurt m' now. There's no' a thing I can say tae turn your mind from it. I know that. All I can say is tha' I love you. Ye're m' friend. I will b' here for ye..."
Korunue takes another deep breath. "I know." she says softly. "I know." She breathe deeply, opening her eyes. They were full of pain, and sadness. She says nothing. There's nothing she CAN say... she breathes deeply, trying to force the thoughts from her mind. She looks over Sinai's shoulder to see a second wolf join the first, this one night black, as black as the first was white. She ignored them, continueing to tell Sinai her story.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ time passes ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Korunue sighs, as Sinai fell asleep. She looks out at the water, feeling hopeless and lost. The two wolves, one black and one white, lay down. They would not come unless invited.. her sleeveless cloak over a sleeveless remains of a straitjacket made her arms cold. She glanced at Ronin, watching him sleep.
Ronin grunts and rolls over in his sleep, curling up into a little ball. His ears lay flat against his head and he seems to be shaking slightly.
A woman walks from out of the cover of the trees and kneels by the edge of the lake to take a drink, letting her hood fall back in the process. The fallen hood reveals long, ebony hair framing a pale face with a small nose and three vertical stripes on each cheek and pointed ears. She freezes as she spots Korunue and Ronin.
Korunue looks up, for only a second, then returns her gaze to Ronin. A tear drips down her face. She hurt him so much... she wanted him to wake, but yet didn't want to face him. She wanted everything to magiclly be alright...
Ronin jerks in his sleep and rolls over. His ears standing up now, he sniffs the air but still doesnt wake up. His face looks troubled.
The girl edges closer cautiously until she's only a few feet from Korunue "Um....is he alright?" she asks, gesturing to Ronin. Her voice is slightly rough from disuse and she seems unsure of the words she uses.
Korunue looks at the woman, sorrow in her eyes. "no." she says, flatly, before moving to sit by him. She looks out at the lake still, longing for the peace it can deliver, fearing the pain she will cause others if she accepts...
Ronin rolls over again and puts his arms around Korunue, pulling himself close to her. He still appears to be asleep.
The new girl fidgets slightly in the silence"I-is there any way I can help......?"
Korunue shakes her head no. "unless you can ease suffering... or make one person stop loving another... then no." She sighs, getting a bit impatient. Who was this person, who came from nowhere? Well, Kor could be tight-lipped... she would tell nobody anything. Ever. Even Ronin.
Ronin groans and opens his eyes, the first thing he sees is Kor. He raises his head and looks around, spotting the girl. "AH!" he yelps, leaping up and jumping into a tree, staring down at her. The girl jumps back with a startled yelp.
Korunue jumps, a little, then joins her love in the tree, a little more slowly than he climbed it. "Feeling better?" she asks, smiling a little. "Don't ask where she came from, I don't know."
Ronin nods at Korunue but doesnt say anything, he stares down at the woman, studying her for a moment. Finally he speaks. "Who are you and what do you want?" his voice wavers a bit, like he is scared or crazy.
Korunue places a hand on his shoulder. Crazy... she was the one wearing a straitjacket, after all. She didn't bother to ask what was wrong. It was all her fault. She had done this to him. She didn't speak, though, for fear the stranger would overhear and tell somebody... chase her back to the asylum, and him with her...
The girl stares at the Ronin, her violet eyes showing nothing but wariness "My name" she says quietly "is Ayori, I just came into this clearing to get a drink. I saw your friend over here and asked what was wrong with you. that is all" she lapses into silence again.
Korunue frowns at her. "well, shove off, Get your drink and leave us be." she spares Ronin the trouble of telling her off... he could get violent...
Ronin sighs and straddles the branch, leaning against the trunk of the tree. "I am not well, not anymore" he says, frowning.
Ayori shrugs slightly before going over to the lake edge and pulling out water skin. She finishes refilling it and, after a quick drink, gets up and starts walking away.
Ronin looks down at the ground, judging the distance. Maybe if he jumped, headfirst....
Korunue takes a deep breath. Then another. Then another. Breathe... in and out, in and out, forget how much it hurts, forget the peaceful lake... forget... she moves her hand from his shoulder to around his waist, trying to comfort him, shutting her eyes.
Ronin sighs and hugs Korunue back, he has no real reason to kill himself. "Kor, I think something really is wrong with me. I keep thinking about the best way to die. What is it, do you know?"
Korunue starts to answer. "The..." then she shakes her head. "What am I saying? No! Don't do it! Listen: you want me to be with you forever, right? If we die, we'll be seperated."
Ronin frowns and nods at Korunue. "Do you have any idea what is wrong with me then? Why do I keep thinking about this stuff?"
Yuki speaks from the other side of the tree "No, but I DO know what it feels like"
Korunue jumps, nearly falling from the tree. "Yuki!" she says, shocked. "how long have you been there?" she asks, quietly. Had she said anything herself? Maybe she could fool Yuki into thinking that it was only Ronin who was suicidal...
Ronin jumps, nearly falling off the tree, and resisting the urge to just fall. "At least someone does."
Korunue takes Ronin's hand, looking at him. She knew what it felt like to crave death... but she knew better than to say so in front of Yuki. She hadn't wanted Aldrea to die, she wouldn't let Kor die either. So if she wanted to ever have the chance to die, best not to tell... what was she thinking?! She should tell... she wouldn't tell.
Yuki looks at Korunue and Ronin. She has black bags under her eyes and her voice is tired "I've been here awhile, and i remember when I used to feel just like you do." This last comment was directed at Ronin.
Ronin sighs and bows his head, not acknowledging Yuki. He pulls his knees to hsi chest and shudders a little.
Korunue looks at Yuki, confused. "when was this...? I thought... you were always rather anti-death, after all... you were so opposed to Aldrea dying... " she trails off, noticing the shudder, and holds Ronin tighter. She wants to tell him everything'll be alright... 'cept that she knows it won't.
Yuki just turns her head away without answering.
Ronin moves a little when Korunue holds him. He shudders again. "Maybe I should just stay here, not go anywhere again."
Korunue doesn't push the issue. SOMEONE had to be strong, after all... she hated that it had to be her. She looked out at the lake. "Drowning. The best way is to drown. The lake is so peaceful... you almost don't know you're dying until it's too late if you do it right. And it feels like death: utter stillness, no pain..." she answers his earlier question. She does not respond to his preposal.
Yuki stares at Korunue"Kor, I know you don't want Ronin to die, but here you are telling him the second easiest way. Now why doesn't that strike me as right?"
Ronin raises his head slowly. "Whats the easiest way, to just stay here, nto moving, not worrying ever again. Just waste away to nothing?" he puts his head back down.
Korunue looks confused. "second easiest?" she asks, frowning. She sighs. "sorry. I'm not the best person for the job...." she turns back to Ronin, hugging him tightly. "please... I can't take it... I can't handle this... oh, what am i saying, it's not like you can help it, just don't..."
Ronin nods at Korunue, but hangs his head again. "But it seems so peaceful, so quiet. Do I have any real reason to stay around, it seems I'm the cause of all your problems. Maybe if I go to sleep for a long time, you won't have any more."
Yuki turns to Ronin "That's not true. You are most certainly NOT Kor's problem. In fact, I bet your the only one she really tells her problems to and trusts enough to help her."
Korunue shakes her head vigourusly. "no! Don't say that... it's all my fault. You were always the strong one, but I.. I pushed you too far, and now look at you. I... I truely am a monster. I hurt everyone. It's not your fault at all." A few tears drip down her face.
Yuki wipes away Korunue's tears "And you, are not a monster.And it is not your fault."
Ronin doesnt notice the tears, his eyes being downcast and all. "No, you're not at fault. It's never your fault." he doesnt move his head, but adresses Yuki now. "Maybe, just maybe."
Korunue shakes her head. "Think, Ronin! The only reason... the whole reason you're upset is me. If you hadn't met me, you'd be your old human-hating attitude self. The self I fell in love with... and all I've ever done was cause you pain. I... if it wern't for me, you wouldn't have died. If it wern't for my leaving, you'd be able to handle it... it's my fault, all of it. I hurt everyone. You... Sinai...I failed my mother, and Aldrea... I hurt Yuki, and my father... everyone. Absolutely everyone." The tears are really flowing now, uncontrollably.
"You didn't hurt everyone. Most certainly not me or Ronin." Yuki buts in.
Ronin looks up at Korunue and his mouth gapes open. "Kor, oh Kor. I'm sorry." he says, wrapping his arms around her. "Please, forgive me?" he pulls her close to him. "I'm sorry."
Korunue sobs, leaning on him. "it's not your fault... I hurt you... so many times... just by living, I hurt you, but my death would hurt you more or I'd be dead in an instant..."
Ronin hugs Korunue tightly. "And if you died, then I would die too. So whats the point? Why don't we both die and be done with it?" Yuki, unable to handle much more of this, stelthily crept away.
Korunue closes her eyes. "I don't want you to die... I want to see you live, and be happy. I'm being selfish... I'm just a selfish monster who hurts everyone she touches... but I don't want you to die." she says this softly, eyes shut.
"I don't want you to die either, so what are we to do?"
Korunue takes a deep breath. "I don't know. We could just die anyway... but we'd be seperated for eternity. Do you... would that be all right with you? If I can live with this pain... I can die with this pain, if it's what you want."
Ronin sighs and looks down at the ground. It seems to be a good 30 or 40 ft. away. He looks at Korunue and leans to the side, falling off the tree, headfirst. Korunue nearly has a heart attack, and leaps after him, heat aching, and grabs his arm, accidentally turning him a little. She lands on her arm, not her head, and a sickening crack is heard. She lays there, not moving, wondering if she's dead or not, and more importantly if he's dead or not.
Ronin was turning already to land on his feet, but Kor turned him more. He lands on his own side, on his own arm, which pops under him. "Kor!, why in the world did you do something like that?" he struggles to pull himself with his good arm over to her.
Korunue concentrates on the pain in her arm... the pain... funny, it blotted out the pain in her heart entirely. She smiles, a little... she doesn't answer his question. She looks out at the lake. "d'arvit. Now we can't drown very well... wonder what Yuki meant by second best way..." she murmers under her breath.
A woman appears among the trees, looking around idly. She had picked a random place, actually, and was rather pleased with what she has found. She seats herself by the edge of the lake, seemingly unbothered that the fringes of her green robe are getting soaked. Her large draconic wings flex and spread behind her, glad to have room to spread once again. She glances up at the sound of voices, her chesnut hair flowing smoothly off her shoulder as she turns her head.
Ronin groans and sits up, cradlign his arm. He looks at Kor and grimaces in pain. "Aww! Why'd you go and do something like that? I was just gonna land on the ground." He shakes his head and looks Koruneu over. "You hurt anywhere else?"
The woman searches the landscape with green eyes fringed with sky blue, slightly curious. She strokes a silver bracelet encircling her left wrist idly, still searching. She stands on bare feet and calls out, "Hello?"
Sinai awakens in her cabin, wondering what Korunue's doing today, worrying about her suddenly for some reason, having worried about her greatly the other day when she had told her what had been going on--along with Aldrea's ill news...
Korunue shakes her head slowly. "you never answered my question." she murmers to Ronin. She glances at the woman, then decides she won't be trouble... unless his answer was "yes"... no "good samaritan" would let them both die. No matter how much they wanted it...
The woman walks over, glancing over each of them carefully. "Looks like you met some rough times."
Rhys was stalking about the forest.. doing his usual routine of spying.. but today.. somethign clicked within his head.. and the urge to enlighten filled his every feather/scale.. Rhys watches the two.. there suicidal ways making him watch with anticipation.. they only needed that one push...
Ronin shakes his head at Korunue. "No I wouldn't be alright with that." he perks his ears up and turns to look at whoever it was next to the lake, grimacing as he turned, must have broken some ribs too. "Aye we have, now. Who are you, and what do you want?"
Sinai gets dressed slowly, pondering over things still in her head, dressing in all black again, that seeming to be her mood as of late, black and dark, brooding and moody, angry and bloodthirsty, full of pain and agony...She picks up her staff, and slowly makes her way to the lake, it being the other spot where she goes to have peace--it being big enough to keep people away, mostly.
"I'm Ali Cia. Anything the matter?" the woman says, concerned.
Korunue looks away from her, ignoring Ali, waiting for Ronin to answer her. If he longed for death more than her... she hears his answer. there is hope yet... and she feels much better now that she was injured. MUCH better. This could work for her... physical pain made emotional pain go away. "leave us be." she says to Ali. The wolves had gone...
Ronin looks the woman over and decides she couldn't do much more harm to them than they themselves had done. "Everything is wrong. But please, let us alone. It seems the more people come around, the worse off we are.No matter how good their intentions."
"Now why would I?" Ali asks, leaning against the tree. Her bare feet grip the ground with the expertice of a cat, the souls scarred here and there from travel. "I like being here."
Rhys speaks aloud.. the psionics and wind carrying his voice in what seemed all directions.. Rhys screwed up mind games round 2.. he thought.. Looking upon the saddened and depressive group.. no his work is not done yet.. for pain is not tasted in there mouths and sorrow fills their soul.. "The truth is spoken Ronin.. No one is ever out to make others happy.. its always about that self feeling.. isnt it?"
Korunue growls a little. "Leave us alone! Everyone always stops us." she hears Rhys, and shuts her eyes, calming herself. "leave us alone. Everyone, just go away! We don't need any of you!" she cries, becoming a bit frantic.
"Maybe I could help you end your miserable lives..." Ali offers
Rhys chuckles as the dark night seems to swirl about darker with Rhys' wishes.. "Go away from what? To another mortal's pathetic life and waste my time with such behaivior? No i pick my prey very carefully.."
Ronin jerks his head up, followed by his ears, scanning in all directions, trying to locate Rhys. "Aww hell" he says under his breath. With a slight smirk on his face he looks at Ali. "Weve already tried to end our lives, we couldn't even do that in peace."
Korunue looks up at Ali, wide-eyed. "you... you'd do that?" she asks softly. She looks at Ronin, as if asking him what to do, what he wants. She ignores Rhys, having heard much the same from Jenny recently... this was nothing new to her.
Sinai hears something off in the distance, and frowns a little--she seeming to do that alot as of late...She quickens her pace to get to the other end of the lake, wondering who it was that crying out and the fearsome voice, wondering if it was Rhys, needing to speak with him greatly still--even though she, deep within her heart, tried not to trust him, sometimes she just couldn't help it...
"Ronin.. i know what you need.. honostly.. its written all over your face.." Rhys says, stepping out from the bushes.. "DO you need me to tell you what you really have to do? This self mutilation is far from what you really need."
Ali_Cia holds up her hand, a daggar appearing, the blade glimmering, engraved with strange runes. The handle is golden, decorated with golden flowers and gems. She glances at Rhys and lowers the blade to her side. Rhys' red shifty eyes stare upon Ali with there soft glow.. Rhys smiles and shakes his head.. "Put the blade away its a waste of your time and energy.. I came not to slay... not yet.."
Ronin growls, low and deep. He finally locates Rhys and struggles to his feet, grimacing and cradling his left arm. "What! What do you want? Why me? Why her? WHY!?!" he yells at Rhys.
Sinai hurries upon the scene. "Hopefully no' yet." She frowns a little, but says nothing more, giving Rhys the look of "I've been needing to talk with you some time. NOW would be good."
"They just wanted death. I can give it to them." Ali's eyes shift over to the two. "If they wish," she adds.
"Death will find them.. But Ronin.. you just need blood.." Rhys says, smiling brightly before looking to Sinai.. his smile fading to a calm face.. "Yes? What the hell am i now? The wise one?"
Ronin turns and stares at Ali, wild eyed. "Death? If we really and truly wanted death it will be by our own hands." he motions towards the swords at his side. "Not by the hand of batwoman, or some overgrown....what the hell are you anyways?" he says, aiming the last part at Rhys.
Korunue leaps up, grabing Ronin's good arm with hers. She is a little woozy from blood loss, but she steadys herself. "no." she says. "Don't... it's what he wants." she tugs on his arm a little.
"Aye, I'd ha' tae agree wi' Ronin...Besides, if ye sae much as gi' them a papercut, I willna hesistate tae take tha' arm off." Sinai says, with a deep, deep frown, meaning every word.
Ali_Cia chuckles. "Suits me. What do you want?"
"Otherwise what do you need Sinai? I have not the time to waste for i do have a purpose with my showing.." Rhys says, flames flickering from his nostrils slightly..
" I was going tae wait till after ye were done, actually." Sinai responds.
"Well you have my attention so out with it before you lose it." Rhys says demandingly.. licking his lips at Ali..
Ali_Cia seems undisturbed by the "lip licking." It's as if she didn't care what happened to her, and was proud of it.
Ronin growls again and sighs, giving in to Korunue. "Alright, alright. I'll calm down." he says slowly.
Korunue takes a deep breath. "good. Now... are we going to bleed to death, or should we try and stop the bleeding?" She strains to smile... her arm hurt, though not as much as her heart had before.
Ronin grimaces at Korunue and points at one of his pouches. "In there, youll find a balm I made, sort of like jelly. It'll staunch a wound pretty good, I think theres some cloth in there too we can tie something over with."
Korunue digs in the pouch for the balm, spreading it on Ronin's wound first, then wrapping his wound with the bandages she finds. "Is this too tight? Does it hurt?" she asks, concern in her eyes.
Ronin shakes his head. "The tighter the better." He nods and takes the balm, cleaning Korunue's wound and then wrapping it tight. He hands the things to Kor. "Put them back in"
"So, I guess I have no business here. Nobody's ready for the aid of a demon." Ali says.
Korunue gives a weak smile to Ronin before turning to Ali. "If I wanted the services of a demon, I'd ask Ronin. Nobody asked you to butt in." She then takes Ronin's hand. "come, let's go someplace a little less... crowded." she murmers. She still didn't know what to do... and she knew better than to ask Ronin.
Sinai looks to Korunue. "I'm sorry for butting in, Korunue...I was also coming to see if you and Ronin were still here so I could visit. I hadna sat down and talked with both of you since...since that incident." Meaning after Ronin stopped trying to attack her.
"I'm an illusion." Ali says. Then she disappears in a puff of white smoke and reappears a few feet away, then disappears again and pops up in a tree. "Maybe you're all dead," she considers cooly."
Korunue looks ashamed. "I'm sorry about... that... I really am... It was rash and stupid, and it hurt everyone..." she looks down, a single tear falling. Her head pops back up at Ali's words. "No. Death is calmer... more peaceful, less painful."
Ronin grimaces and pulls his ears from Rhys's and Sinai's conversation. "Where do you want to go?" he blinks and looks at Ali "Well what good is an illusion to people like us?" he turns and nods at Korunue, holding back a grimace. "She's right, death is so calm and empty, nobody around to brainwash you and make you hurt yourself and your loved ones." he says the last part louder and directs it towards Rhys.
"One second, Rhys..." Sinai moves to both of them, and gives Korunue a close hug--but notices her wound, and looks at her questioningly, then to Ronin, asking the same question, but with another one added on: "I know how masculine and strong you are, but you look like you could use a hug. May I? What happened to you two, by the way?"
"Then maybe you haven't seen Oblivion yet." Ali swings down, hand over hand, graceful as a deer and agile as a monkey. She lands and stands straight. "I happen to be a very interesting illusion.. not just a vision."
Korunue sighs, leaning on Ronin a little. "you wanna explain?" she murmers. Then she turns to Ali. "Death is sweet, painless, an escape, a relief. Death is... " she snaps out of it, about to say 'What I long for', but she knows it'd hurt Ronin to hear. "'m sorry." she murmers.
Ronin growls at Sinai. "Don't touch me, I saw you talking to Rhys, that can't be anything good. I might have a broken arm and look weak, but that doesn't mean I can't beat the hell out of you if you get close to me."
Sinai follows Rhys without complaint. "I'll talk to the both o' ye later..."Walks with her staff much like a hiking stick, but with more respect to it than that..Before she is pulled away, she winces deeply, lowering her head greatly, like some great wound had been struck deep into her, and she turns away slowly, knowing her pain is nearly complete...all she needed was Korunue's anger as well...
Korunue bites her lip. "Ronin! Sinai only wanted to help... she's my friend... don't attack her. She's had it rough..." she's not sure how much Sinai would want her to tell. She shakes her head. Her arm had stopped hurting... she was thinking... and that wasn't good. She needed a distraction.
Ronin growls at Sinai as she leaves. "Sh's with that demon, hes the source of all our...no, not all our problems. Your "friend" "Jenny", she is the rest of the problem, shes the one who hurt you, Rhys is the one that hurt me.I don't want anything to do with any of them."
Ali_Cia yawns. "If nobody wants me, I'll just leave."
Korunue frowns. "Stop it! Jenny helps me, Sinai helps me, and you're being stubborn." A white wolf had appeared near the forest, and she wimpered, laying down. She (the wolf) licks her lips idelly, sending a thought to Ali: can you help them? If you think you can, don't give up! Please... don't let my sister get them.
Ali_Cia hides a smile as she returns the thought, Don't worry. I'm always around to help. If anything, what would you like me to do?
The wolf looks interested. Don't let them die. They want to... they've tried. My goddamned sister put suicidal thoughts in Kor's head, and now they're both at it.
Ronin looks at Korunue and frowns. "Kor...listen to me. Yes, Sinai helped you, she helped me. But now she is with that demon and that means shes ruined, he might brainwash her and send her after us. As for Jenny, how did she help you? Send you to an asylum? Oh, lots of help there. Y'know, I wish I had someone that helpful with me."
Korunue growls a little. "She sent me nowhere! Listen to me! All she's ever done was help! I... I went to the asylum on my own. I went to a convent, and the nuns.. the NUNS, mind... said I was.... mad. I... I'm not sure they're wrong..." her anger fades by the end, and she sounds sad, looking down and to the left, ears drooping lower than ever before around him.
So that's it.. Ali's mind reaches out and begins examining the two. It's basicly giving up all senses for just that one single input.
Ronin drops his broken arm and turns Korunue's head back to him, not as gentle as normal. " I don't care what the damn nuns said. I bet I know why they think you're crazy, why you think thigns like you do. I bet that "Jenny" put thoughts into your head, or maybe even brainwashed you, like Rhys did me. It's possible and don't tell me it isn't."
Korunue is stunned. she says nothing. She can't say anything. Her jaw drops... "I..." she tries to speak. Ow. This HURT... she pulled away from him, sobbing, and ran off into the woods, to think....
Ronin growls and runs off after Korunue. "Get back here, I don't want to have to do this all over Kor. Get back here!"
Korunue turns, panting heavily, eyes wide with fright. he was GROWlING? at HER? She gasped, then ran for her life, faster than before. She didn't know where she was going, and she didn't care. She had to get away.. if he hurt her... she'd lose it. Permanantly? she didn't know.
Ali_Cia appears near Kor. "I think I can help you.. I happen to be a wonderful psychiatrist and healer... though I also know the art of death as well."
Ronin bumps into trees, branches and limbs swatting at him. He roars and pulls out his wakizashi, hacking at everythign in his way and trying to run faster. He knows he is faster than Korunue since he spent most of his life in the woods.
Ali_Cia fades away and reappears in a tree, relaxing in the branches.
Korunue races through the woods, terrified, desprate, blind. She gasps for breath, but doesn't stop... until she stumbles upon Sinai. "Sinai... help... Ronin...." she manages to gasp, coming to a stop.
Sinai looks to Korunue, and furrows her brow. "What's wrong, Korunue...?" She looks behind her, and pulls Korunue behind herself. She frowns, her staff in her hands, in a defensive stance.
Ronin bursts upon Kor and Sinai. "Both of you! You're both in league against me arent you? They've brainwashed you both!" he screams and launches himself towards Sinai, sword raised.
Sinai looks at him, shocked. "What on bloody earth are ye talking about, Ronin?" She blocks it with some effort, wincing when she sees the sword's blade bite into the wood, and nearly sheds a tear, wishing she had her sword.
Korunue leaps in front of Sinai, under sword and staff, screaming "Ronin! stop!" at the top of her lungs. She hopes he won't kill her... she fights to maintain a grip on her sanity... she knows that if he doesn't stop....
Ali_Cia reaches out and tries to grab the scruff of Ronin's neck. She may appear to be in the tree, but she's really down there, invisable.
Ronin is stopped by two things at once, the grip on his neck and Korunue. He simply stops where he is, sheathing his sword and hanging his head. His ears droop and he doesnt move a muscle.
Ali_Cia fades from the tree and appears, holding Ronin's neck. "Maybe I am a little confused here, but I think everyone's a little out of it."
Korunue quivers a little, saying nothing. She reaches out a hand, gently, and places it on his shoulder tentitivly. "Ronin?" she asks, softly, wondering if he was alright, trusting him. After all, the worst he could do was kill her... it pained her to think how he'd feel if he did...
Ronin snorts but doesn't move his head. "Demons, feh, they're everywhere. Why are they so interested in me? What did I do? What did you do Kor?" he raises his head and looks sadly at Kor. He appears to be crying, suddenly his whole body shudders and he starts to sob...again.
Korunue pulls him loosly into a hug with one arm, allowing him to cry on her shoulder. She tries hard to be strong... "nothing... you did nothing. You're absolutely perfect." she whispers, running a hand through his hair gently.
Ali_Cia slowly lets him go. "I can help you both if you let me."
Ronin wraps his good arm around Kor and sobs harder. Why did he feel like this? Like everything he had been so confident was different now. Wasn't he supposed to be the strong one? Shouldn't he be proud of his youkai heritage?
Ali_Cia sits in mid air, just watching silently.
Korunue holds him, even with her bad arm... she didn't care about the pain anymore. She rocks, slightly, good hand on his head. "it's alright... don't worry.... I' m fine, Sinai's fine... " she whispers. "I'll stay with you as long as you want..."
Ronin suddenly stops sobbing. "Sinai..." he says, the name seeming to burn on his tongue. He looks over at her and glares. "You...why? Why are you with that demon? He's out to get me, and you know it!" Ronin is starting to sound hysterical again.
Sinai had been holding her staff to her, watching them, looking saddened, just llistening. Now she looks at him, stunned. "He...he can do something I canna...." She looks away."I need him for something I canna accomplish on m' own...It concerns my friend...and a control collar around her neck."
"Do you want me to grab him again?" Ali offers.
"You're going to help him arent you? Thats what your payment is to him! He's going to make you kill me!" Ronin cries.
Sinai shakes her head. "Nay..."
Korunue begins to get scared again, trying to calm him. "shh, shhh, it's alright, really... she won't betray us... And even... nevermind." She is starting to think morbidly... she shifts her bad arm, feeling the pain shoot through her arm and banishing the emotional pain. "She wouldn't.... she won't... you saw, when we died before... I trust her with my life."
Ronin looks at Korunue and nods slowly. He goes over to a tree and sits down, his back against the trunk. His ears ae alert and scanning as he pulls his knees to his chest and looks around, like he is afraid he is going to be attacked any minute.
"Well, I'm here if anyone needs me." Ali says.
Ronin looks pitiful. Korunue heads over and sits next to him, wrapping her good arm around his shoulders. She pulls her own knees to her own chest, placing her head on his shoulder. She sighs, trying hard not to think of....
"If I knew what was wrong, I would help, but..." Ali trails off. Korunue looks at Ali. Ronin sighs and puts his good arm around Kor's shoulders. Ali looks right back. Ronin doesn't think.
Korunue looks at Ali. "Everything. And I don't think you can help." she says, flatly, her voice sounding tired and... more flat and dead than normal. She shuts her eyes, taking a deep breath or two.
"Do not underestimate the powers of one willing to help." Ali mentions.
Korunue frowns, looking at Ali. "Do not underestimate the magnitude of this...." she can't help it. She thinks. How sweet death would taste, how peaceful the lake was... no pain, no heartache... and Ronin, better, not like this, not scary and violent and losing his grip... sweet release, sweet escape, sweet death... if only it wouldn't hurt Ronin she'd kill herself now. Right that second... she needed to be strong.
"You wanna know whats wrong? Demons, they're out there, trying to ruin my life. Demons and humans. Humans killed my mother and Demons are trying to kill my only love. Now, I get brainwashed and made to attack humans, I nearly kill Sinai there...not so sure she doesn't deserve it now. I end up making Kor kill herself, then I kill myself. Some human keeps us from dying completely. We come back and nothing is right again." Ronin says, with passion. " And now, we get to put up with a seeming overabundance of people who seem to be worried about our well being, but are all too ready to help us die, willing or no."
"Maybe you two need a little rest... I happen to have my own little.. spot.. you might be able to use temporarily... call it a free vacation." Ali offers.
Korunue shuts her eyes, tears falling, breath raggid... she does not, however, bemoan her fate, but turns to Ronin. "it'll be alright... you have to have hope, you have to think it'll turn out alright... or else why bother living at all?" she murmers in his ear. She ignores Ali, not thinking that will help at all. Not one bit.
"I guess you don't want a vacation from life... I suppose I'll just go there for now." Ali muses.
Ronin sighs and stretches out, seeming to relax a bit. "Whatever are we going to do?" he says, placing his hurt arm in his lap.
Korunue sighs. "I don't know. I just don't know." She remembers her last suggestion and winces, not from the pain in her arm but from the painful memory... she wasn't strong enough to handle it if he killed himself, this she knew.
"Okay, we all know that death isn't the best answer and you two.. have the idea of suicide?" Ali seems rather confused at this.
Sinai sits down, folding her legs on top of one another, and sits with her staff across her lap, looking grave and solemn. "I'm sorrah I made ye think I was doing something wrong, Ronin....I..."She can't hold back the tears, yet again, wishing she knew why it was so damned important for her body to show her crying over such matters in public... "my friend needs tha' collar taken off...or I will lose her..and..." She can't go on, but doesn't sob this time, "keeping her dignity" by not sobbing in front of him.
Korunue looks at Ali. Just looks. And looks. Then she hears Sinai... but she is overwhelmed... she can't handle supporting 3 people... she can't.... she takes a deep breath, closing her eyes, and tries to block out the world.
Ali falls silent. "All you need to say to me is yes or no.. that is all."
Ronin sighs again. "We can't stay like this Kor. We need to do something, travel or something. Get away from these demons."
Sinai can see the look on Korunue's face, and looks to her, wiping the tears away with the sleeve of her black shirt "Tis all right, Korunue...I think I can manage now..."She lies faintly as she tries to cease her tears, finding them undignified and unstately.
"Like I said, I can offer a vacation." Ali says once more.
"I don't want any damn vacation from someone I don't know" Ronin growls.
Ali holds up her hands, stepping back slightly. "Sorry.. sorry."
Korunue swallows hard. "I... I don't..." she says faintly. "I can't..." then SHE breaks down sobbing, unable to control it any longer. She sobs onto Ronin's shoulder, unable to bear this any longer....
Sinai places her staff against a tree, and moves to Korunue quickly, sitting on the other side of her, a hand on her back, rubbing gently. Ronin pulls Korunue close to him. "Shh, shh, calm down. It'll be alright Kor, we'll do something." he said, the thoughts seeming so odd to him compared to what he had been saying just minutes before.
Korunue sobs and sobs. "I can't... it's too much... oh Ronin..." she manages, sobbing harder. She feels like her heart is breaking... she knows what he wants, and what she wants, and it scares her... and Yuki... Yuki, the strongest of them all.... if she was like them, there was no hope for a poor ikkiyou like herself...
Ali closes her eyes, a sphere of white appearing around her, covering her entirely. It swirls for a moment, then stands opaque where she was standing.
Sinai remembers the words Ronin spoke to her before Rhys dragged her away...She almost winces outwardly again, but manages to contain it, taking one of Korunue's hands and holds it in hers, trying to help comfort her.
Ronin hugs Korunue tighter. "Kor, it's ok. Think about it, all we have to do is travel, away from everything. When we come back, we will be fine. The demons will maybe have forgotten about us."
Korunue cries, her sobs slowly turning to sniffles. She looks absolutely miserable. She realizes she's still wearing the remains of her straightjacket... maybe she WAS losing it... after all, she was thinking of death like it was a picnic... she shakes her head gently. "They'll follow me... I tried running away once before..." she murmers, softly, sniffling, her voice sounding flat and dead.
"You tried running away with a demon." Ronin points out.
"And Ronin refuses to trust a stranger promising time to think.." The voice came from the sphere, a soft voice.
Korunue shakes her head. "Jenny's not bad.... and besides, the nuns chased her off."
Sinai doesn't want to intrude, but after what Ronin said to her, she's afraid to even speak, feeling suddenly submissive, and doesn't mind for once, her dominant side going away for a while, and it shows in her posture and in her face, but she says nothing, not speaking now, just thinking..wondering if Rhys was right, and she was becoming corrupted...
Ronin looks around, focusing on Sinai. "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking straight. I think I'm alright now. Not suicidal anymore. We need somewhere to stay." he says, giving Korunue a squeeze. "Do you know anywhere close by that we could stay safely?"
"And it's right in front of your face.." comes the voice again.
"Do you think you could guard us here tonight?" Ronin asks of Sinai.
"Aye...Easily."
Korunue looks down, a tear sliding down her nose. "It won't work. The problem isn't the demons... it's me. It's me.... I'm not strong enough.... " she sobs, heartbroken.
Ali reappears from inside her bubble. "And people still ignore me.."
Sinai smiles softly to Korunue. "I'll b' strong enough for ye."
This is a good stopping point. It's not over yet! ^^ REVIEW