Chapter 2: Luigi v. Mute City I
*****
Disclaimer: I don't own rights to Luigi, Reanoks (Varg, from "Buzz Lightyear of Star Command," is a Reanok ("RAY-uh-knock")), F-Zero, or the Poltergust 3000.
Also note that I've never actually played F-Zero.
*****
Luigi: Did I black out? This isn't the lobby I was in a while ago.
::sniffing sounds::
Reanok-like voice: What smell different?
Pico (w/ Reanok voice): (enters) Who you, little man?
Luigi: I'm Luigi Mario.
Dr. Stewart: Relax, I've heard of this guy. He's prob'ly here to clear the clog in the toilet.
Luigi: Actually, I'm here to race.
Pico: Lobby carpet need good vacuuming. Hah, hah, hah, hah, hah.
Luigi: I'm not a janitor!
Pico: Little man have plunger and vacuum.
Luigi: The Crazy Hand sent me here to teach me a lesson about making fun of Captain Fal.
Pico: Whoa, whoa. No one make fun of Captain falcon but us.
Samurai Goroh: No one but ME.
Luigi: Crazy Hand is making me live out a race as the captain.
Pico: You want race, you wipe out before you can cry "Mayday!"
Samurai Goroh: Don't you mean (girly whiney voice) "Mayday?" ::pretends to tremble::
Pico: You funny man. ^__^
Dr. Stewart: Luigi, you'd better make your way to the garage and climb into the Blue Falcon. We'll go with Knight League and Mute City.
(On the track) (will be easier in paragraph form)
Off the start, the Wild Goose and Fire Stingray got boosts from the cars to their rights. The Golden Fox was on the far right, so didn't get one. Luigi didn't know about this, so the Blue Falcon didn't get one, either.
Luigi took the first two turns easy, but balked at the third, because it was at a right angle, and he didn't quite fancy plummeting 300 feet over the edge.
After rounding the turn, he found himself several meters behind the other cars. He pressed his foot as hard as he could against the accelerator, and started creeping up on the Golden Fox. Then came the jump. The Golden Fox went over it and muscled the Blue Falcon away from it.
Not wanting to aggravate Dr. Stewart, he just stayed on the right edge of the track while the Golden Fox took the center. Then came the gravel. The Golden Fox was going around it, but Luigi decided to extend his Poltergust 3000's nozzle and clean it out of the way.
So they were going to tease him for having a vacuum, were they? Well, if that's how it was.
While Luigi was clearing his path, he was, at the same time, creating a small pocket of lower-pressure air in front of the Blue Falcon. This gave him enough advantage to catch up to the Wild Goose.
Pico: Don't think I not see that, lousy little cheater.
Luigi (sarcastically): You mean that wasn't the carpet in the lobby?
Pico intentionally let the Blue Falcon get ahead for a space, but then bounced the Wild Goose off the Blue Falcon so he could round the hairpin more quickly, and also nearly sending the Blue Falcon careening off the edge into the cityscape far below. Needless to say, the Golden Fox passed the Blue Falcon again.
The Blue Falcon burst into the straightaway then, with the Poltergust once again creating an artificial draft for it again.
He caught up to the Golden Fox, and he put away the vacuum, riding a real draft now. He used the first turn after the lap marker to pass the Golden Fox, then slingshot past the second turn. He put on his breaks when he got to the right turn again, but this time, he left his other foot firmly on the accelerator. After actually jumping the jump this time around, he pulled up behind the Wild Goose. He cut ahead by clearing a path through the gravel again.
The hairpin was coming up. He let off the accelerator, and pointed the Blue Falcon's nose, er, beak. to the right. He then slammed on the brakes and put on the metal cap, thus sending him almost to the drop-off, and also causing him to fishtail so that he was pointing straight down the straightaway.
He simultaneously doffed his hat and switched from brake to accelerator, and as soon as he removed the metal weight from his body, the unpinned Blue Falcon sped down the straightaway and finished lap 2 mere feet in front of the Fire Stingray.
Now the shoe was on the other foot. The Fire Stingray was using the Blue Falcon to propel itself. It passed the Blue Falcon at the right turn, and the Blue Falcon would have passed the Fire Stingray at the gravel, if Samurai Goroh hadn't figured out to use the path blazed by Luigi.
The Fire Stingray also had a steering advantage when it came to the hairpin. On the straightaway, Luigi decided to use the Super Jets to pull into first, then used Poltergust to finish that and all subsequent laps (and ultimately the race) in the lead.
(back in the lobby) (back to script form)
Samurai Goroh: You were using the vacuum to cheat.
Luigi: Oh, you mean that's. not allowed? ::sweatdrop::
Dr. Stewart: We frown on things like that.
Pico: Next race, you leave vacuum in lobby.
Luigi: ::pout:: Oh, fine.
*****
Disclaimer: I don't own rights to Luigi, Reanoks (Varg, from "Buzz Lightyear of Star Command," is a Reanok ("RAY-uh-knock")), F-Zero, or the Poltergust 3000.
Also note that I've never actually played F-Zero.
*****
Luigi: Did I black out? This isn't the lobby I was in a while ago.
::sniffing sounds::
Reanok-like voice: What smell different?
Pico (w/ Reanok voice): (enters) Who you, little man?
Luigi: I'm Luigi Mario.
Dr. Stewart: Relax, I've heard of this guy. He's prob'ly here to clear the clog in the toilet.
Luigi: Actually, I'm here to race.
Pico: Lobby carpet need good vacuuming. Hah, hah, hah, hah, hah.
Luigi: I'm not a janitor!
Pico: Little man have plunger and vacuum.
Luigi: The Crazy Hand sent me here to teach me a lesson about making fun of Captain Fal.
Pico: Whoa, whoa. No one make fun of Captain falcon but us.
Samurai Goroh: No one but ME.
Luigi: Crazy Hand is making me live out a race as the captain.
Pico: You want race, you wipe out before you can cry "Mayday!"
Samurai Goroh: Don't you mean (girly whiney voice) "Mayday?" ::pretends to tremble::
Pico: You funny man. ^__^
Dr. Stewart: Luigi, you'd better make your way to the garage and climb into the Blue Falcon. We'll go with Knight League and Mute City.
(On the track) (will be easier in paragraph form)
Off the start, the Wild Goose and Fire Stingray got boosts from the cars to their rights. The Golden Fox was on the far right, so didn't get one. Luigi didn't know about this, so the Blue Falcon didn't get one, either.
Luigi took the first two turns easy, but balked at the third, because it was at a right angle, and he didn't quite fancy plummeting 300 feet over the edge.
After rounding the turn, he found himself several meters behind the other cars. He pressed his foot as hard as he could against the accelerator, and started creeping up on the Golden Fox. Then came the jump. The Golden Fox went over it and muscled the Blue Falcon away from it.
Not wanting to aggravate Dr. Stewart, he just stayed on the right edge of the track while the Golden Fox took the center. Then came the gravel. The Golden Fox was going around it, but Luigi decided to extend his Poltergust 3000's nozzle and clean it out of the way.
So they were going to tease him for having a vacuum, were they? Well, if that's how it was.
While Luigi was clearing his path, he was, at the same time, creating a small pocket of lower-pressure air in front of the Blue Falcon. This gave him enough advantage to catch up to the Wild Goose.
Pico: Don't think I not see that, lousy little cheater.
Luigi (sarcastically): You mean that wasn't the carpet in the lobby?
Pico intentionally let the Blue Falcon get ahead for a space, but then bounced the Wild Goose off the Blue Falcon so he could round the hairpin more quickly, and also nearly sending the Blue Falcon careening off the edge into the cityscape far below. Needless to say, the Golden Fox passed the Blue Falcon again.
The Blue Falcon burst into the straightaway then, with the Poltergust once again creating an artificial draft for it again.
He caught up to the Golden Fox, and he put away the vacuum, riding a real draft now. He used the first turn after the lap marker to pass the Golden Fox, then slingshot past the second turn. He put on his breaks when he got to the right turn again, but this time, he left his other foot firmly on the accelerator. After actually jumping the jump this time around, he pulled up behind the Wild Goose. He cut ahead by clearing a path through the gravel again.
The hairpin was coming up. He let off the accelerator, and pointed the Blue Falcon's nose, er, beak. to the right. He then slammed on the brakes and put on the metal cap, thus sending him almost to the drop-off, and also causing him to fishtail so that he was pointing straight down the straightaway.
He simultaneously doffed his hat and switched from brake to accelerator, and as soon as he removed the metal weight from his body, the unpinned Blue Falcon sped down the straightaway and finished lap 2 mere feet in front of the Fire Stingray.
Now the shoe was on the other foot. The Fire Stingray was using the Blue Falcon to propel itself. It passed the Blue Falcon at the right turn, and the Blue Falcon would have passed the Fire Stingray at the gravel, if Samurai Goroh hadn't figured out to use the path blazed by Luigi.
The Fire Stingray also had a steering advantage when it came to the hairpin. On the straightaway, Luigi decided to use the Super Jets to pull into first, then used Poltergust to finish that and all subsequent laps (and ultimately the race) in the lead.
(back in the lobby) (back to script form)
Samurai Goroh: You were using the vacuum to cheat.
Luigi: Oh, you mean that's. not allowed? ::sweatdrop::
Dr. Stewart: We frown on things like that.
Pico: Next race, you leave vacuum in lobby.
Luigi: ::pout:: Oh, fine.