Disclaimer – I don't own Pokemon
Sorry this took so long, but my friend only came back yesterday. Depending on when your reading this it had been one years and four days since I first uploaded this story.
Reasons of the Heart – Help Me
Misty sighed as she surveyed the scene around her.
Ash had been so distant lately, ever since that day in the courtyard when he tackled her to the ground and almost kissed her.
The blissful memory tried to tug a smile to her lips but it only reminded her of the fact that he didn't kiss her and that she wasn't even sure if he wanted to anymore.
She had cried that night. For the first time in a long time, she had just locked herself away in her room and let the tears fall from her eyes.
It had been a long time since Ash had given her reason to cry, more and more often he had become the reason for her not to cry and the reason she smiled so often. But he had been the reason that she cried, and she cried harder than she could remember until her head hurt so much she felt like it was going to explode.
She didn't blame Ash, she wasn't angry at him for causing her tears. She was angry at herself.
There were so many reasons, for crying, for not being pretty enough for him to want to kiss her, for pushing him away so often and building walls between them so he couldn't reach her, for calling him names in their younger years, for running away five years ago. Mostly she was angry at herself for being angry.
Deep down she knew exactly whom she should be angry at, she knew exactly who was to blame but she couldn't seem to get herself to do so.
So she just cried harder. She buried her head in a pillow and drowned out the sounds of her sobs from any passer by.
"you don't want to hate him," she remembered Melody telling her one time.
She was trying so hard to convince herself and everyone else that she did, that it was exactly what she wanted to do because she couldn't handle it any other way. Tears seemed to steam down her face so easily then as she tried to figure it all out and tried to push Ash out of her life.
"If you did," Melody continued upon seeing Misty's confused reaction, "you wouldn't have to try so hard to convince yourself of it. The human mind is an amazing thing, you should know that better than any of us, and if deep down you really wanted to hate Ash, you would and you wouldn't be crying right now and you wouldn't need to justify your reasons."
"You know how it goes," Sabrina added proving Melody's point. "Fake love has to try to fall in love, true love has to try not to."
How she had tried, she had tried harder than anything else from the very beginning not to fall in love with his chocolate brown eyes that melted into her soul, not to fall in love with his smile or his messy ebony locks, but the harder she tried, the deeper she fell. She fell deeper with every second, every moment she looked into those eyes, every time he said her name she just fell deeper into his spell.
At least now all the tears had dried out. She still had reason to cry, he was still standing so close yet he seemed an entire lifetime away, she just didn't think she had any tears left in her whether she wanted to cry or not.
She could hear his constant breathing beside her, deep, relaxed and slow. Somehow this relaxed her.
She made herself more comfortable in her chair and focused on the sound, taking it all in. She closed her eyes relaxing into the sound of his deep breathing and . . .
'Wait,' she thought to herself, 'was that a snore?'
She listened carefully for a second and heard the same sound again almost immediately.
"Ash Ketchum you wake up right this instant!" she yelled next to his ear drawing the attention to herself and Ash.
He jumped out of his chair and tried to look busy or something.
"I wasn't sleeping," he insisted. "I was just resting my eyes."
"Sure Ash," she said turning away and playing with the tiny daisies beside her.
Ash sighed with relief and relaxed into his chair watching Misty from the corner of his eye.
He knew she was upset with him and he felt his heart breaking in two. She had good reason to be angry at him, to hate him even. He was an egotistical prick who couldn't seem to make up his mind, especially when it came to her. He just hoped she didn't hate him as much as he knew she should.
He knew the distance that had come between them was his fault, but he had good reason to put it there.
The distance was like Misty's walls in a way. They too were for protection, but not for himself. In some ways the protection was for Misty but in more it was for his perfectly laid plans.
He had put the distance between them to ensure that nothing like that day in courtyard ever happened again, at least not between then and the dance. He didn't want to come so close to getting the one thing he had dreamed of for so long only to deny himself it and hurt Misty in the process.
He knew that he couldn't handle that again and neither could she.
If he ruined it all now by letting desire take control of him and giving in to his instincts he may end up losing her, he might have gotten the signals crossed and ended up doing something that she didn't want. He couldn't risk that so he had to keep to the plan and maybe that would be the one thing that could win her over and make her fall in love with him.
It was strange. From one look in those beautiful, crystal clear, cerulean blue eyes he fell in love with her all over again yet he never realised that she too had fallen in love with his chocolate brown ones.
For a long time he was so scared that he had merely fallen in love with the memory of the girl that had gotten away but as he spent more time with her he fell more and more in love with the woman she had turned into. He fell more and more in love with this beautiful, intelligent goddess that had only become more beautiful with the years apart.
He had always found Misty to be beautiful, even when they were both naïve ten year olds who knew nothing about love. Even in the times when he thought Misty was some kind of witch casting spells on him and turning his legs to jelly, when he thought that all the feelings he felt inside were evil magic caused by the enchantress beside him on the tree stump. Even when they were on non-speaking terms, minus the occasional insult, but still almost subconsciously placed their sleeping bags next to each other's on the forest floor.
He couldn't remember a time when he didn't think she was beautiful in some right. All he could remember was that defining moment on maidens peak when he realised that Misty had something no one else could ever match. That defining moment in his life when he realised just how beautiful she really was and that even though she was the most beautiful girl there in his eyes and could have probably danced with any guy she liked, she wanted to dance with him.
He wasn't even sure what that really meant at that time, he wasn't even sure if he understood what that meant now, but it had changed the relationship between the two.
It wasn't an overnight sort of change, just subtle one that took its time and calmly changed into something more mature. In a way it changed from the three of them, Ash, Misty, and Brock to just Ash and Misty.
And he liked it that way.
He cherished the moments in his journey when it was just himself and Misty and no one else. He liked the way that the two of them could just sit in silence for hours but not find it awkward or forced. He liked the way that he could be so relaxed around Misty despite the secret he was hiding.
He liked being with Misty and there really wasn't any place he would rather be.
I wish I could defineAll the thoughts that cross my mind
They seem too big for me to choose
I don't know which ones to use
When I'm falling down so far
I think I'll never see your light
Bouncing off of me
Shining down here from your eyes
Help me
Figure out the difference
Between right and wrong
Weak and strong
Day and night where I belong
Help me
Make the right decisions
Know which way to turn
Lessons to learn
And just what my purpose is here
It's like I've I got the signals crossed
With messages I can't decode
Half asleep, never wide awake
And I'm on complete overload
I've got too much information here
And nothing I can really grasp
I should know the truth
But I'm too afraid so I have to ask
Help me
Figure out the difference
Between right and wrong
Weak and strong
Day and night where I belong
Help me
Make the right decisions
Know which way to turn
Lessons to learn
And just what my purpose is here
Want to love you
More than anything
I need you
In my every dream you're there for me
Do you love me?
For who I am
No angel just an ordinary man
Help me figure out why I'm stuck in the middle
Tying to understand why I can't
Why you're such a riddle
Got my eyes crossed
Thinking so hard and I know I'm missing the mark
Can you help me sort out all this information
I'm just racking my brain
Keep paying attention
Put I'm still lost and at all costs
I got to know
Help me
Figure out the difference
Between right and wrong
Weak and strong
Day and night where I belong
Help me
Make the right decisions
Know which way to turn
Lessons to learn
And just what my purpose is here
Help me figure out why I'm stuck in the middle
Tying to understand why I can't
Why you're such a riddle
Got my eyes crossed
Thinking so hard and I know I'm missing the mark
Can you help me sort out all this information
I'm just racking my brain
Keep paying attention
Put I'm still lost and at all costs
I got to know
('Help Me' Nick Carter)
"some people," Jessica sighed to Melody her voice full of aggravation as they took a break from their stressful positions to watch our two favourite Creative Directors interact.
"totally," melody replied with a similar tone of aggravation in her voice.
"how can they be so completely and utterly . . ." Jessica trailed off as she searched for the perfect word to describe the two.
"clueless?" Chloe offered coming into the conversation stars painted on either side of her face as well as a few paint smudges.
"I was thinking more along the lines of dense," Jessica replied.
Melody nodded. "So how's the banners going?" Melody asked Chloe who just happened to be in charge of it.
"Good," Chloe nodded. "But on something totally unrelated, I need to choose a date for the dance."
Melody and Jessica stared at Chloe with skeptism.
Melody gaped. "You've only got about forty hours until the dance and you're telling us you don't have a date?" she asked her voice full of shock.
"I have a date," Chloe said. "Two to be exact, I just don't know which one to go with. Tom or Orlando."
Chloe was pretty with a kind air around her, plus she was the sort of person that made everyone she met happy. She could be one of the guys, or one of the girls depending on her mood and she had two of the best looking guys in Davison at her feet.
"Well, then who asked you first?" Jessica asked trying to take the logical approach to sort this out.
"See that's the problem," Chloe replied, "they both asked me at the same time while I was online so I can't use that."
"geez," Jessica sighed in frustration. "why don't you just go with both of them?"
Chloe thought about this proposition for a second. "Why don't I?" she asked. "I mean I am Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile and she had affairs with how many guys . . ."
"Including her brothers," Jessica whispered to Melody when Chloe wasn't looking.
"ewwwww, incest," Melody complained screwing up her face in disgust.
" . . . I mean," Chloe said continueing her trail of thought aloud despite the fact that Melody and Jessica weren't quite listening to her. "I could have my own Marc Anthony and the ugly egotistical one who named a month after himself, what was his name?"
"You mean Julius Ceazer?" Melody offered.
"Yeah, salad guy," Chloe nodded. "It'd be perfect."
"Yeah," Jessica agreed sarcastically, "you think Misty would mind?"
"Why would Misty care?" Chloe asked.
"Well, she is in charge of this dance," Melody explained. "she'd probably tell you that this is a couples dance not some kinds of dirty dancing managetrois."
"she's has a point there," Jessica agreed.
"fine, I'll go tell Tom I'm going with Orlando," Chloe sighed sadly. "it's not like he would have made a good Julius Ceazer anyway, he's too cute for the part."
She went off to break the bad news to Tom while Jessica and Melody fell into fits of laughter.
"So, did you find out anything about what Ash is up to?" Melody asked after their laughter had died down.
This was a far more serious and important topic. They were still trying to discover what it was exactly what Ash had planned to make Misty fall in love with him, not that she wasn't already, but Ash didn't know that fact.
Jessica shook her head no. "how about you?" she asked. Melody replied the same way.
Melody sighed. "Parker is like his best friend, you'd think he'd at least know something," she said frustratedly.
Jessica nodded. "maybe he's afraid that bringing others into this could ruin it."
Melody sighed again. "let's just hope that Misty doesn't run away this time."
~ to be continued ~
Ok, so another chapter done. Yeah I know this chapter is a bit well, pointless but you can't blame me if I've forgotten the plot of the story or something. You also can't blame me if I start using stuff I've already used because quite frankly I don't remember.
Next chapter is pre-dance, you know very interesting stuff you know attempted murder of Ash, M . . . actually never mind that's the next, next chapter. I really have to start paying more attention to where these things fit in.
Please review, the more the merrier.