*Dan is laying down and napping in a plain*
Dan: zzzz zzzz zzzz
*suddenly, the air sparks around him and energy gets gathered*
Dan: CRUM!!!
*There is a flash of light and a big capsule is inside of a crater*
Dan: Ack! Aliens!
*The Pod opens and steam comes out, and we see an omnious sillouette inside the capsule*
????: A ha ha ha ha! Fools! They have underestimated my power! I may be powerless in the future, a mockery, but now, with the help of this time machine, I can crush them now! Their power is nothing at this time, and i can shape the future in my own image! *a slimey looking guy in a suit walks out of the capsule*
????: Now, is the time of my reign! I must waste no time to thrust my influence into the world's population. Every second that passes, is a second wasted!
Dan: Hey pal! Shut up! Im trying to get some sleep over here!
????: What!?!? YOu! You are one of them! How dare you raise your voice at me! You will be the first to be converted!
Dan: Hey, just who the hell are you!
????: Prepare to face the wrath of Senator Liberman
Dan: Who?
Liberman: Your violent ways are at an end! *pulls out a whip and whips at Dan*
Dan: CRUM!!
Liberman: Change your violent ways boy! Vengance is not the answer! *whips Dan's tush*
Dan: Ow! Hey stop that *punches at Liberman*
Liberman: *sidestepps* Your not cut out to be a fighter, here, you can star in my next big game! *pulls out a SNES from timepod*
Dan: What?!?
Liberman: Try it out, its Street Debater 2 Turbo!
*on screen*
Gore: I do NOT have to much mascera on!
Bush: *cough* Fairy *cough*
Akuma: ..........Me Suit!
Dan: CRUM!! *begins to watch*
Liberman: Yes now for my final blow! *rips off buisness suit, exposing his BDSM get up*
Dan: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!
Liberman: Dont run away baby!
Dan: *gut punches Liberman, then uppercuts*
Dan: Korryuken!!!
Liberman: Ow what strength!! *puts on a earphone and scans Dan*
Liberman: Wow, that power level is the highest I've ever seen! *pulls out a needle*
Dan: Hey man, I am not into those enemas! What am i talking about, im not even into guys at all!
Liberman: This is no enema! This is used to take a sample of your DNA so i can use your DNA to make a league of super warriors!
Dan: Well im sorry Mr.Badguy, but your S.O.L. on that one!
Liberman: Really how about this! *sticks dan in the arm*
Dan: ACK! Nooo! Draining, my life fluids, cant, go, on, getting weak! *passes out*
Liberman: Strange, I only withdrew a 3 milligrams, hmm *kicks Dan's limp body*
Liberman: Now, off to my mountain of non violence *opens up his umbrella and flies away*
But this was not my lords final stand, for the gods smiled upon him this day. But that is another part of this story,
*far off, a Black Van is driving closer, with 3 people sitting in the front seat*
Dudley: *looking at map* I say, are you sure this is the right way to Aunt Jemima's house? The last family reunion we had I didn't take this way at tall!
Elena: She lives in the country,
Dudley: But we have be traveling off road for hours now, and we seem to be in some sort of 80's medival movie parody
Mr.T: Shut up with the Jibber Jabber! I know where Aunt Jamama's house is, I all the time be getting my Syrup from her! Just leave the drivin to me!
Dudley: Pardon me Archibald, but I believe we pronounce our dear old aunt's name Jameeemah!
MrT: Shut up fewl!! Dont you know my name aint no Archibald! Thats a white boy name! They call me Mistah Tee! Cuz Im tough!! Mister Tough! HUughh! *flexes* now i gotta step on it, I dont want Aunt Jeemeemee pancakes to get cold,
Dudley: I beg your pardon!
Elena: Look out! Cracker in the road!
Dudley: Oh, i do need some Crackers for my tea *sips* cant we stop?
*Mr T slams on breaks and gets out*
Mr T: Uh oh, there is some dead honkey layin over here!
Dudley: Oh poo
Elena: Hey he aint dead
Dan: eeehhh
Elena: I know a medicine man that can save him!
Mr T: Nuh uh, Im gettin' outta here, you fewls can stay here and get busted by the Man if you want to, but I aint gonna kidnap no white boy!
Elena: Not kidnap! Take to the healer!
Dudley: Oh pretty please Mr T?
Mr T: Shut up Girlie Man! I dont wanna hear any of your jibber jabber!
And so, they took our hero to the ghetto, and brought Dan before me
Elena: Oh wise Oni, please help us
Oni: I will one day be a legend! Bow to me! Cant you hear the choir?
Elena: Yes Oni!
Dudley: I say, it appears we have come across some common trailor trash
Elena: Just play along!
Oni: Bow! Bow before your kiiiaaannnngggg!
Dudley: *bows*
Mr T: You just a fewl seeing things that aint there!
Oni: You! *pointing to Mr T* Sing with the choir!
Mr T: *clenching fist* You gonna be singing in high notes after I stick my fist down yo throut sideways and backwards!
Elena: Sing!
Mr T: I aint singing for no fewl!
Elena: Ill hold my breath! *holds breath*
Mr T: .......
Elena: *turns red*
Mr T: .......
Elena: *turns blue*
Mr T: Fa la la la la, now give whitey the antidote!
Oni: Hmmmmm *looks at Dan*
Oni: !!!!! He is da chosen one!
Dudley: Egads!
Elena: Wow!
MrT: What you talkin bout fool!
Oni: We must revive him, in order to do that we must leave his body in the heart of the ghetto, then at midnight, the hoodrats will come to try and claim him. If they do he will be for ever gone, but if they fail he will revived!
Elena: Lets do it!
*that night*
Elena: Are you sure you tied him down good?
MrT: Shut up fewl, Im sure, and if that dont work I can just run up and sit on him. This guy better be rich or something, because Im missing out on Aunt Jeminias's pancakes!
Dudley: dear me, I think someone is coming!
Hood: Yo man get his wallet!
Hood2: Hurry up!
Elena: Nooo! *jumps out of bushes* You cant take him, he is the chosen one!
MrT: I pity the fewl that trys to mess with my friends!!
Dudley: Lets rock! *bring bring* Oops tea time!
*Elena holds Dan down as Mr T throws all the hoods over his head*
Dan: Eh what happened?
Elana: *holds Dans head* Not even the gods themselves could seperate us, our love is stronger than reality itself
Dan: Ummm, can i get your digits first?
MrT: Hold on now! Aint no Cuz of mine gonna smash it with no long haired hippy cracker!
Elena: Oh come on!
*back at Oni's place*
Oni: King! King I tell you!
Elena: Oni, we have saved the chosen one!
Dan: Chosen one?
Oni: Eurekaa!!! You are the chosen one!
Dan: Chosen one for what?
Oni: To head down to the ABC store and pick me up some wine! I would go but i lost my licsense
Dudly: oh my
Oni: Here, ill give you the money! *hands Dan 5 bucks*
MrT: Hold up, we went though all this so some scrawny suckah could get him some wine. You better be serving up some Pankakes with that wine, fewl!
*At Liberman's HQ*
Liberman: Ahhhh ha ha ha ha! Perfection! My morality beam is finished!
Ky: Impressive My Liege.
Liberman: Yes, yes, Ky, it is. We will rule the world with fluffy cloads and good ole Democratic morals! WE WILL MAKE YOU DO WHAT WE THINK IS RIGHT!!!! HAHAHA!! NOTHING CAN STAND IN OUR WAY, NOT EVEN THE REPUBLICANS!
*Ronald Reagan crawls to Liberman's leg*
Reagan: Nnnoooo
Liberman: Such heroic nonsense..... *kills Reagan*
Ky: But my leige, how can we inforce such morals without resorting to violence ourselves
Liber: Ky, I am glad you asked, you see, there can be love expressed through pain and punishment, thats why I formed the BDSM Christians!!! *looks out window*
*Their is an army of leather clad BDSM Warriors outside*
Liberman: You, Ky, must lead them to a world without hentai!!
Ky: Yes my master!!
Liberman: And if you fail, I have the Dan Clones!
Ky: The Dan Clones are ready?
Liberman: They will begin production soon, but I have right here the Dan Prototype
Dan Clone: *pops neck*
Liber: Yes, magnificient, it has 100% of Dan's potential awakened and is under my control!
Dan Clone: No I'm not
Liberman: I brought you to life, you must obey me!
Dan Clone: I dont have to do anything
Liberman: Verywell, PLEASE help me
Dan Clone: Whatever, hey whats my name
Liberman: *has flashback*
Dan: Well Im sorry Mr.Badguy, but your S.O.L. on that one!
Liberman: Yes your name will be Sol Badguy!!!
Sol: Phef, whatever
Liberman: Now Ky! Fire the morality ray!!
*Meanwhile, back at Oni's front porch*
Mr.T: I cant beleive we saved some poor honkey instead of going to Aunt Jaymama's house
Dudley: Its pronounced Jemima
Mr.T: Shuttap fool! I pronounce it "Good Pancakes"
Dan: Thanks you guys, I owe you guys one
Mr.T: Shuttap fewl!!!! I better go call Aunt Joojoomee collect by using 1-800-collect *goes inside*
Dan: But we gotta go save the....eh?
Radio: *music starts* BIG BOOTY HOES! HUMPWITTAHHH!
Dan: *turns around and sees Elena doin a dance for him*
Elena: *jiggles her booty*
Dudley: My word cousin Elena...
Dan: You aint nutin but a hoochie mama!! *starts dancing with Elena*
Elena: tee hee hee!
*Suddenly Oni's door disentegratres*
Mr.T: I PITY THE FEWL THAT BE GRINDIN' WIT MY CUZZZ!
Dan: Uh oh!
Mr.T: *Pick Dan up over his head and throws him up against a brick wall*
Dan: Ooooff!
Elena: Oh Cuz, why you bugging for?
Dudley: My word, what is that?
Mr.T: Its a good as dead crackah is what it is! *picks up Dan*
Dudley: Beg your pardon, but i was talking about that
Elena: Huh?
*A shaft of light goes acroos the ghetto, and suddenly the all the drug dealers drop their wares and pull out a chess bourd, the Cops decide to treat the perps to a Banana Spilt, and in general everyone stops robbing, stealing, and anything immoral*
Dudley: My word, how odd
MrT: This some strange shit goin down, stranger than that white fewl that thinks he is king
Oni: *from inside* I am destined!
Dudley: This is not right atall
Dan: Ooo
MrT: *turning around* Elena get your hands outta his pants!
*Later*
Oni: This, this is not good at all!
Dudley: *sipping tea* My word,
Oni: Yes, the entire world has taken on the mindset of the Barney's Hide And Seek Video Game Champion, 4 year old Stinky Jim!
Dudley: My....word. I have ran out of English phrases so I must begin to repeat myself.
Mr.T: Shut up fewl, dont you have any cuss words or somethin'
Dudley: I beg your pardon, but it isn't mannerly to
Oni: SHUT IT!! I AM KING AND I AM TALKING!!!
Mr.T: Quit that Jibber Jabber! I dont remember no King buisness, Im trying to teach my cuz here to act like he has grown some testicles in the last few mintues!
Oni: Such Insolence!!! Guards! SEIZE HIM!!! *Throws Ninja Turtle Action figures at Mr.T*
Mr.T: ....ok sucka i once thought you were messed up cuz your a white boy living in the middle of the ghetto, but now your jus gettin scary
Oni: Its gonna get scarier!!! Look at this! *turns on TV*
Liberman: Whos the baddest cat around? Liberman! Liberman!
Mr.T: WHAT!?! Im the baddest cat around fewl!!
TV: Liberman, Liberman
MrT: Mr.t! Mr.t!
TV: Liberman, Liberman
MrT: Mr.t! Mr.t!
Dudley: Hmm, where is Dan and Elena?
Mr.T: They betta not be doin no hanky panky!
Oni: Dont worry, they are in the Playboy suite, performing a ritual....
Elena: *from through the door behind Oni* Give it to me Give it to me!
Oni:... A ritual asking the gods for guidence
Elena: Yeah baby! Oh baby! Baby baby baby!!!
Oni: And, the ritual for fertility
Elena: Oh yeah, I been bad baby spank me! Spank me SPANK ME!!!
Oni: And the ritual asking for discpline over our transgressions
ELena: Stick it in deep! Deeeeeeepppppp
Oni: And scuba diving instruction!
Elena: Oh yeah, once you go black baby, you dont go back, yeah, uuuuuhhhh, uh huh, thats right
Oni: And the ritual of screwing a poor white boy's brains out
Mr.T: Outta the way fewl!!!
And so, my lord shared the first lay of his life with Elena, the African Princess
Oni: Now that i have all of you together, i will tell you all what is going on! Liberman and his army of BDSM Christians have taken over the world!
Dudley: Not very gentelmenly of him
Mr.T: Oh shut up fewl!
Oni: He used his Morality ray to tame the entire world! now nobody wants to kill, fight, or have sex!
Elena: Except me!
Mr.T: Not when Im around!
Dudley: But, Oni ole chap, how come we are uneffected?
Oni: Hmmmm *thinks* It has to be my computer
Dan: Your computer? Why?
Oni: It is pure hentai and pornography, and not the nice lesbian porno, but the dirty stuff. The pure essense of perversion, and it must have repelled the morality ray!
Mr.T: Ok, nobody takes ovah the world when Im around!
Dudley: Yes, let us begin a prilgramedge to his mountain of power!
Oni: You dont need to get involved, the HAMMER PANTS NINJA CLAN will take care of the job
Mr.T: The what?
Oni: HAMMER PANTS NINJAS! ASSEMBLE!!! *thrusts hand into the air*
*silence*
Dudley: Excuse me ole chum, but where are they?
Oni: *hand still in the air* You cant see or hear them because they are Ninjas
Mr.T: This fewl talking to ghosties that aint there, lets go! *sees Dan and Elena in the yard*
Dan: Now, whenever you jump really high, say YAHOO like me!
Elena: *jumps high* Hoo!
Dan: *jumps* Yahoo!
Mr.T: Quit messin around Elena, if you are intent on making Dan your personal ho, me and him gonna have ta have some talkin, get in the van!!
Dudley: Talley ho then!
Mr.T: No ya dont sunshine, white boy is riding shot gun so me and him can have a man to man. Elena and you get in the back
Dan: zzzz zzzz zzzz
*suddenly, the air sparks around him and energy gets gathered*
Dan: CRUM!!!
*There is a flash of light and a big capsule is inside of a crater*
Dan: Ack! Aliens!
*The Pod opens and steam comes out, and we see an omnious sillouette inside the capsule*
????: A ha ha ha ha! Fools! They have underestimated my power! I may be powerless in the future, a mockery, but now, with the help of this time machine, I can crush them now! Their power is nothing at this time, and i can shape the future in my own image! *a slimey looking guy in a suit walks out of the capsule*
????: Now, is the time of my reign! I must waste no time to thrust my influence into the world's population. Every second that passes, is a second wasted!
Dan: Hey pal! Shut up! Im trying to get some sleep over here!
????: What!?!? YOu! You are one of them! How dare you raise your voice at me! You will be the first to be converted!
Dan: Hey, just who the hell are you!
????: Prepare to face the wrath of Senator Liberman
Dan: Who?
Liberman: Your violent ways are at an end! *pulls out a whip and whips at Dan*
Dan: CRUM!!
Liberman: Change your violent ways boy! Vengance is not the answer! *whips Dan's tush*
Dan: Ow! Hey stop that *punches at Liberman*
Liberman: *sidestepps* Your not cut out to be a fighter, here, you can star in my next big game! *pulls out a SNES from timepod*
Dan: What?!?
Liberman: Try it out, its Street Debater 2 Turbo!
*on screen*
Gore: I do NOT have to much mascera on!
Bush: *cough* Fairy *cough*
Akuma: ..........Me Suit!
Dan: CRUM!! *begins to watch*
Liberman: Yes now for my final blow! *rips off buisness suit, exposing his BDSM get up*
Dan: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!
Liberman: Dont run away baby!
Dan: *gut punches Liberman, then uppercuts*
Dan: Korryuken!!!
Liberman: Ow what strength!! *puts on a earphone and scans Dan*
Liberman: Wow, that power level is the highest I've ever seen! *pulls out a needle*
Dan: Hey man, I am not into those enemas! What am i talking about, im not even into guys at all!
Liberman: This is no enema! This is used to take a sample of your DNA so i can use your DNA to make a league of super warriors!
Dan: Well im sorry Mr.Badguy, but your S.O.L. on that one!
Liberman: Really how about this! *sticks dan in the arm*
Dan: ACK! Nooo! Draining, my life fluids, cant, go, on, getting weak! *passes out*
Liberman: Strange, I only withdrew a 3 milligrams, hmm *kicks Dan's limp body*
Liberman: Now, off to my mountain of non violence *opens up his umbrella and flies away*
But this was not my lords final stand, for the gods smiled upon him this day. But that is another part of this story,
*far off, a Black Van is driving closer, with 3 people sitting in the front seat*
Dudley: *looking at map* I say, are you sure this is the right way to Aunt Jemima's house? The last family reunion we had I didn't take this way at tall!
Elena: She lives in the country,
Dudley: But we have be traveling off road for hours now, and we seem to be in some sort of 80's medival movie parody
Mr.T: Shut up with the Jibber Jabber! I know where Aunt Jamama's house is, I all the time be getting my Syrup from her! Just leave the drivin to me!
Dudley: Pardon me Archibald, but I believe we pronounce our dear old aunt's name Jameeemah!
MrT: Shut up fewl!! Dont you know my name aint no Archibald! Thats a white boy name! They call me Mistah Tee! Cuz Im tough!! Mister Tough! HUughh! *flexes* now i gotta step on it, I dont want Aunt Jeemeemee pancakes to get cold,
Dudley: I beg your pardon!
Elena: Look out! Cracker in the road!
Dudley: Oh, i do need some Crackers for my tea *sips* cant we stop?
*Mr T slams on breaks and gets out*
Mr T: Uh oh, there is some dead honkey layin over here!
Dudley: Oh poo
Elena: Hey he aint dead
Dan: eeehhh
Elena: I know a medicine man that can save him!
Mr T: Nuh uh, Im gettin' outta here, you fewls can stay here and get busted by the Man if you want to, but I aint gonna kidnap no white boy!
Elena: Not kidnap! Take to the healer!
Dudley: Oh pretty please Mr T?
Mr T: Shut up Girlie Man! I dont wanna hear any of your jibber jabber!
And so, they took our hero to the ghetto, and brought Dan before me
Elena: Oh wise Oni, please help us
Oni: I will one day be a legend! Bow to me! Cant you hear the choir?
Elena: Yes Oni!
Dudley: I say, it appears we have come across some common trailor trash
Elena: Just play along!
Oni: Bow! Bow before your kiiiaaannnngggg!
Dudley: *bows*
Mr T: You just a fewl seeing things that aint there!
Oni: You! *pointing to Mr T* Sing with the choir!
Mr T: *clenching fist* You gonna be singing in high notes after I stick my fist down yo throut sideways and backwards!
Elena: Sing!
Mr T: I aint singing for no fewl!
Elena: Ill hold my breath! *holds breath*
Mr T: .......
Elena: *turns red*
Mr T: .......
Elena: *turns blue*
Mr T: Fa la la la la, now give whitey the antidote!
Oni: Hmmmmm *looks at Dan*
Oni: !!!!! He is da chosen one!
Dudley: Egads!
Elena: Wow!
MrT: What you talkin bout fool!
Oni: We must revive him, in order to do that we must leave his body in the heart of the ghetto, then at midnight, the hoodrats will come to try and claim him. If they do he will be for ever gone, but if they fail he will revived!
Elena: Lets do it!
*that night*
Elena: Are you sure you tied him down good?
MrT: Shut up fewl, Im sure, and if that dont work I can just run up and sit on him. This guy better be rich or something, because Im missing out on Aunt Jeminias's pancakes!
Dudley: dear me, I think someone is coming!
Hood: Yo man get his wallet!
Hood2: Hurry up!
Elena: Nooo! *jumps out of bushes* You cant take him, he is the chosen one!
MrT: I pity the fewl that trys to mess with my friends!!
Dudley: Lets rock! *bring bring* Oops tea time!
*Elena holds Dan down as Mr T throws all the hoods over his head*
Dan: Eh what happened?
Elana: *holds Dans head* Not even the gods themselves could seperate us, our love is stronger than reality itself
Dan: Ummm, can i get your digits first?
MrT: Hold on now! Aint no Cuz of mine gonna smash it with no long haired hippy cracker!
Elena: Oh come on!
*back at Oni's place*
Oni: King! King I tell you!
Elena: Oni, we have saved the chosen one!
Dan: Chosen one?
Oni: Eurekaa!!! You are the chosen one!
Dan: Chosen one for what?
Oni: To head down to the ABC store and pick me up some wine! I would go but i lost my licsense
Dudly: oh my
Oni: Here, ill give you the money! *hands Dan 5 bucks*
MrT: Hold up, we went though all this so some scrawny suckah could get him some wine. You better be serving up some Pankakes with that wine, fewl!
*At Liberman's HQ*
Liberman: Ahhhh ha ha ha ha! Perfection! My morality beam is finished!
Ky: Impressive My Liege.
Liberman: Yes, yes, Ky, it is. We will rule the world with fluffy cloads and good ole Democratic morals! WE WILL MAKE YOU DO WHAT WE THINK IS RIGHT!!!! HAHAHA!! NOTHING CAN STAND IN OUR WAY, NOT EVEN THE REPUBLICANS!
*Ronald Reagan crawls to Liberman's leg*
Reagan: Nnnoooo
Liberman: Such heroic nonsense..... *kills Reagan*
Ky: But my leige, how can we inforce such morals without resorting to violence ourselves
Liber: Ky, I am glad you asked, you see, there can be love expressed through pain and punishment, thats why I formed the BDSM Christians!!! *looks out window*
*Their is an army of leather clad BDSM Warriors outside*
Liberman: You, Ky, must lead them to a world without hentai!!
Ky: Yes my master!!
Liberman: And if you fail, I have the Dan Clones!
Ky: The Dan Clones are ready?
Liberman: They will begin production soon, but I have right here the Dan Prototype
Dan Clone: *pops neck*
Liber: Yes, magnificient, it has 100% of Dan's potential awakened and is under my control!
Dan Clone: No I'm not
Liberman: I brought you to life, you must obey me!
Dan Clone: I dont have to do anything
Liberman: Verywell, PLEASE help me
Dan Clone: Whatever, hey whats my name
Liberman: *has flashback*
Dan: Well Im sorry Mr.Badguy, but your S.O.L. on that one!
Liberman: Yes your name will be Sol Badguy!!!
Sol: Phef, whatever
Liberman: Now Ky! Fire the morality ray!!
*Meanwhile, back at Oni's front porch*
Mr.T: I cant beleive we saved some poor honkey instead of going to Aunt Jaymama's house
Dudley: Its pronounced Jemima
Mr.T: Shuttap fool! I pronounce it "Good Pancakes"
Dan: Thanks you guys, I owe you guys one
Mr.T: Shuttap fewl!!!! I better go call Aunt Joojoomee collect by using 1-800-collect *goes inside*
Dan: But we gotta go save the....eh?
Radio: *music starts* BIG BOOTY HOES! HUMPWITTAHHH!
Dan: *turns around and sees Elena doin a dance for him*
Elena: *jiggles her booty*
Dudley: My word cousin Elena...
Dan: You aint nutin but a hoochie mama!! *starts dancing with Elena*
Elena: tee hee hee!
*Suddenly Oni's door disentegratres*
Mr.T: I PITY THE FEWL THAT BE GRINDIN' WIT MY CUZZZ!
Dan: Uh oh!
Mr.T: *Pick Dan up over his head and throws him up against a brick wall*
Dan: Ooooff!
Elena: Oh Cuz, why you bugging for?
Dudley: My word, what is that?
Mr.T: Its a good as dead crackah is what it is! *picks up Dan*
Dudley: Beg your pardon, but i was talking about that
Elena: Huh?
*A shaft of light goes acroos the ghetto, and suddenly the all the drug dealers drop their wares and pull out a chess bourd, the Cops decide to treat the perps to a Banana Spilt, and in general everyone stops robbing, stealing, and anything immoral*
Dudley: My word, how odd
MrT: This some strange shit goin down, stranger than that white fewl that thinks he is king
Oni: *from inside* I am destined!
Dudley: This is not right atall
Dan: Ooo
MrT: *turning around* Elena get your hands outta his pants!
*Later*
Oni: This, this is not good at all!
Dudley: *sipping tea* My word,
Oni: Yes, the entire world has taken on the mindset of the Barney's Hide And Seek Video Game Champion, 4 year old Stinky Jim!
Dudley: My....word. I have ran out of English phrases so I must begin to repeat myself.
Mr.T: Shut up fewl, dont you have any cuss words or somethin'
Dudley: I beg your pardon, but it isn't mannerly to
Oni: SHUT IT!! I AM KING AND I AM TALKING!!!
Mr.T: Quit that Jibber Jabber! I dont remember no King buisness, Im trying to teach my cuz here to act like he has grown some testicles in the last few mintues!
Oni: Such Insolence!!! Guards! SEIZE HIM!!! *Throws Ninja Turtle Action figures at Mr.T*
Mr.T: ....ok sucka i once thought you were messed up cuz your a white boy living in the middle of the ghetto, but now your jus gettin scary
Oni: Its gonna get scarier!!! Look at this! *turns on TV*
Liberman: Whos the baddest cat around? Liberman! Liberman!
Mr.T: WHAT!?! Im the baddest cat around fewl!!
TV: Liberman, Liberman
MrT: Mr.t! Mr.t!
TV: Liberman, Liberman
MrT: Mr.t! Mr.t!
Dudley: Hmm, where is Dan and Elena?
Mr.T: They betta not be doin no hanky panky!
Oni: Dont worry, they are in the Playboy suite, performing a ritual....
Elena: *from through the door behind Oni* Give it to me Give it to me!
Oni:... A ritual asking the gods for guidence
Elena: Yeah baby! Oh baby! Baby baby baby!!!
Oni: And, the ritual for fertility
Elena: Oh yeah, I been bad baby spank me! Spank me SPANK ME!!!
Oni: And the ritual asking for discpline over our transgressions
ELena: Stick it in deep! Deeeeeeepppppp
Oni: And scuba diving instruction!
Elena: Oh yeah, once you go black baby, you dont go back, yeah, uuuuuhhhh, uh huh, thats right
Oni: And the ritual of screwing a poor white boy's brains out
Mr.T: Outta the way fewl!!!
And so, my lord shared the first lay of his life with Elena, the African Princess
Oni: Now that i have all of you together, i will tell you all what is going on! Liberman and his army of BDSM Christians have taken over the world!
Dudley: Not very gentelmenly of him
Mr.T: Oh shut up fewl!
Oni: He used his Morality ray to tame the entire world! now nobody wants to kill, fight, or have sex!
Elena: Except me!
Mr.T: Not when Im around!
Dudley: But, Oni ole chap, how come we are uneffected?
Oni: Hmmmm *thinks* It has to be my computer
Dan: Your computer? Why?
Oni: It is pure hentai and pornography, and not the nice lesbian porno, but the dirty stuff. The pure essense of perversion, and it must have repelled the morality ray!
Mr.T: Ok, nobody takes ovah the world when Im around!
Dudley: Yes, let us begin a prilgramedge to his mountain of power!
Oni: You dont need to get involved, the HAMMER PANTS NINJA CLAN will take care of the job
Mr.T: The what?
Oni: HAMMER PANTS NINJAS! ASSEMBLE!!! *thrusts hand into the air*
*silence*
Dudley: Excuse me ole chum, but where are they?
Oni: *hand still in the air* You cant see or hear them because they are Ninjas
Mr.T: This fewl talking to ghosties that aint there, lets go! *sees Dan and Elena in the yard*
Dan: Now, whenever you jump really high, say YAHOO like me!
Elena: *jumps high* Hoo!
Dan: *jumps* Yahoo!
Mr.T: Quit messin around Elena, if you are intent on making Dan your personal ho, me and him gonna have ta have some talkin, get in the van!!
Dudley: Talley ho then!
Mr.T: No ya dont sunshine, white boy is riding shot gun so me and him can have a man to man. Elena and you get in the back