*Sagat is at Barnes and Nobles at his book signing for "Scars of Street Fighting: THe Sagat Story"*
Mr.Big: Wow, I really loved your book, its should be the bible of all video game bosses, we should all be tall and bald!
Sagat: Thanks, next
MrClean: Great book, couldnt put it down! Your an inspiration to all bald people!
Sagat: Im glad you liked it, next
Akuma: Me Suit!
Sagat: Nice hairstyle, next
King: Please sign it "to my love"
Sagat: Oooohh kay, next
Axl Rose: Love your word usuage, can I write a song about it?
Sagat: Sure sure, thanks, next
Dan: Great book, I read it 15 times in one day
Sagat: really? What was your favorite part? *notices on the book cover, he has devil horns, a mustache, glasses, and no teeth
Dan: The part where you KILLED MY FATHER!!! *rips table apart and kicks Sagat in the face*
Sagat: What!?! What is this?
Dan: Take this!!!! *punches at Sagat*
Sagat: *blocks with a copy of "The Complete and Udder Collection of Crappy Dilbert Comics"*
Dan: Oh my hand!
Sagat: What are you doing kid?
Dan: Avenging my fathers death!! *kick him in stomach*
Sagat: Ooof, listen kid, I killed many kids fathers, if you want a chance for revenge you will just have to take a number!
Dan: Ok, *holds up one finger* Number One! *uppercuts*
*meanwhile, in an house that seems to have nothing to do with this story right now*
Jin: *arrives home at noon after his college classes*
Jin: That Prof is so screwy! I don't want to right an essay about Barney! Ill write one about smashing in his face instead! Now for some Lunch!
Jin: *opens the freezer and grabs a box of Pepperoni Hot pockets*
Jin: Yeah! Allright hotpockets! Ill just heat...huh? WHAT! THERE IS ONLY ONE! WHAT KINDA PERSON ONLY EATS ONE!?!?! BLOODIA!
Felicia: *while munching on a hotpocket* Meoooww!
Jin: FELICIA! AHHH! I HATE YOU! IF YOU WEREN'T SO CUTE I WOULD KILL YOU! *begins squeezing his anger managment squeeky head* STUPID CAT GIrl, why I aughta, I was looking forward to those hot pockets....
Felicia: Why don't you eat the other one?
Jin: WHAT DO YOU MEAN! YOU CAN'T JUST EAT ONE!!!!!!! AHHH! *opens the freezer*
Jin: Oh man, we only have turkey and ham left! Now what!
Felicia: Why not eat those?
Jin: HA! Pizza is the ONLY kind of hotpocket there is!
Felicia: Ok then, order pizza!
Jin: Pizza! You drive your dagger of hotpocket theft deeper into mine heart! I could not eat pizza without my mind thinking that the same warm cheesy goodness could be trapped in a flaky crust for my afternoon meal enjoyment.
Captain Commando: You guys be quiet in there! The Tyson fight just started!
Jin: You need to sh..
CapCom: Nevermind, its over
Jin: *walk into the living room*
Felicia: *curls up in Cap's Lap*
Cap: Hey Jin, can you go do a beer run for us?
Jin: Beer run, why I look like some kinda..
TV: We interupt this cutscene for an important announcement... Choas at Barnes and Nobles, we take you there live!!
Dan: Nice Scar Bob!
Sagat: My name isnt Bob! I dont even think you read my book! Tiger Knee!
Dan: *sends Dan flying into the coffee resteraunt* OOof!
Sagat: I would say something witty right now but a phrase eludes me
Dan: *Pours hot coffee on Sagat's crotch*
Sagat: *screams like a little girl*
Dan: Too hot for you? Hahaha! How many lumps you want? Ill give you two! One! *punches Sagat in the stomach* Two! *uppercuts Sagat in the chin*
Sagat: Grrr, your making me angry kid, TIGER UPPERCUT! *sends Dan flying*
Dan: Oh he wants to use special moves, I wasnt gonna use them but ok, ok
*on the other side of the store, kiddes are gathered around LeVar Burton, who is reading a story*
*Reading Rainbow music is playing*
LeVar: What part in the school play did Grace want?
Kid1: The Pimp!
Kid2: The Dog!
Kid3: The Pornography producer!
Kid4: Dr Wily!
LeVar: Have you kids been listening to a word I have said?
*Dan lands on the kids, killing them on impact*
LeVar: Kids!
Dan: Eh? Huh? *comes too* wha!? JORDY!!! Quick Jordy Im getting beat up you gotta fire your proton torpedos!
LeVar: What? I cant do that?
Dan: Oh no! You dont have your visor your blind without it!
LeVar: No Im not, what are you
Dan: *grabs onto LeVar* DO NOT WORRY, I WILL GET YOU TO A SAFE PLACE TO BEAM BACK UP
LeVar: Quit yelling Im not deaf!
*Sagat runs into the clearing*
Sagat: Come 'ere you little twerp! You stained my Joe Boxers!
Dan: Ahh! Gotta go! *runs off*
*Dan runs down some isle, and ducks into one*
Dan: Gotta hide!
Sagat: *runs by*
Dan: Man o man, what have I gotten into? I never knew he was so strong, I better run away before he kills me like he killed my father! Sob sob
????: Snaaap, out of eet.
Dan: Who said that?
Bruce Lee on the Cover of "The Tao of Jeet Kun Do": Yoo mast nevar give aaap, mistah Hibiki. Now, concetrate, you must strike with feeeelling, we need, emotional content
Dan: Yeah, dont worry Bruce Lee, I WILL AVENGE MY FATHER!!
*the book flies off the shelf and hits Dan in the head*
Dan: Ow!
Bruce: I said emotional content, NOT ANGER! Now twy again!!
Dan: I WILL avenge my FATHER!?!
Bruce: No, dat toooo much like Will Shatner
Dan: I will avenge my FFAAATTHHHERRR!!! *cries*
Bruce: Dats it, go gettem!
Sagat: I could have swore he was, what? A Penthouse, cool! *sees Penthouse, Chun Li is on the cover*
Sagat: Wow, thats latest one, sold out everywhere!
*Meanwhile, at Ryu's house*
Ken: So how about some Yatzee?
Ryu: Sure Ill get the game out of my closest *opens closet*
*tidal wave of Penthouse with comes flowing out, burying the two*
Ken: Hey, Ryu, why am i surounded by pictures of Chun Li spreading her Kootch with a butterknife and a sock puppet? Ryu? Ryu? *looks over at Ryu*
Ryu: *is blushing radioactivly*
Ken: Ahhh the light! Ryu your face is a Cocacola label!
*back at Barnes and Nobles*
Sagat: Mmmmm, butter *bends down to pick up*
Book: *runs away*
Sagat: What the? *gives chase*
*The Book runs to the foot of a giant wall of magazines, all smut*
Sagat: Wow, such a huge section! *stares wide eyed, er wide eye*
Dan: *appears on top of the wall*
Dan: AAAHHHAAAHAA! Burn Sagat, Burn in your porno hell! *kick*
Sagat: What? Noooo! AAHHH!!! *Screams like a little girl as the wall of porno lands on him*
Dan: *stands on the wall on top of Sagat* Well thats taken care of, now, for some entertainment *pulls on a string and brings the Penthouse to him*
Dan: *opens the book and a green light shines forth* What the? *a black orb emerges from the book*
????: Greetings, I am David! The God of Video Game perversion, and you have finally released me from my prison! You have called down the reign of David!
Dan: Hahaha, David? Your kidding right?
David: Whats wrong with David?
Dan: Nothing, *begins to walk off while unfolding the centerfold*
David: Stop right there! You cant look at that!
Dan: Why not?
David: I am the protecting spirit of video game girls! Its my job to make sure nobody ever seen any of them in any sexual situations,
Dan: I hope you never read Fanfiction.net then, some that stuff is off the hook
David: Yes, I may be bad at my job, but thats because I was locked in that book!
Dan: Thats an awful lame excuse on Oni's part
David: Shut up, plot holes are the least of your worries now! I, DAVID! Will destroy the human race
Dan: No you wont, we have too many Davids, you would kill them all
David: Ok, how about if I change my name to Billy?
Dan: nah,
David: How about Scott?
Dan: Get lost
David: Wait I can think of a good one! What about X-Orb? VampireMan?
Dan: your not a vampire
David: Uhhh, *looks at a nearby Marvel Comic, the caption on the title is "Final Confrontaion with Abyss!*
David: What about Abyss?
Bystander1: WHAT? ABYSS!!?!?!? RUNNN!!!!!!
Bystander2: ABYSS WILL KILL US ALL!!!!!!
Reporter: Abyss destroys the world, film at eleven!
Dan: Your name is still David
David: The news has reported me as Abyss!
Dan: So, lots of times they report me as gay
David: Whats wrong with being gay?
Dan: Is their something wrong with not being gay?
David: Why are you wearing pink then?
Dan: During my training I had laundry duty, and I accidently washed one of Ryu's gis with Ken's, so they gave it to me and Ryu got a new one.
David: Your not gay? Awww what a let down, I guess I better go destroy the world then, if your not gay *flies away*
Mr.Big: Wow, I really loved your book, its should be the bible of all video game bosses, we should all be tall and bald!
Sagat: Thanks, next
MrClean: Great book, couldnt put it down! Your an inspiration to all bald people!
Sagat: Im glad you liked it, next
Akuma: Me Suit!
Sagat: Nice hairstyle, next
King: Please sign it "to my love"
Sagat: Oooohh kay, next
Axl Rose: Love your word usuage, can I write a song about it?
Sagat: Sure sure, thanks, next
Dan: Great book, I read it 15 times in one day
Sagat: really? What was your favorite part? *notices on the book cover, he has devil horns, a mustache, glasses, and no teeth
Dan: The part where you KILLED MY FATHER!!! *rips table apart and kicks Sagat in the face*
Sagat: What!?! What is this?
Dan: Take this!!!! *punches at Sagat*
Sagat: *blocks with a copy of "The Complete and Udder Collection of Crappy Dilbert Comics"*
Dan: Oh my hand!
Sagat: What are you doing kid?
Dan: Avenging my fathers death!! *kick him in stomach*
Sagat: Ooof, listen kid, I killed many kids fathers, if you want a chance for revenge you will just have to take a number!
Dan: Ok, *holds up one finger* Number One! *uppercuts*
*meanwhile, in an house that seems to have nothing to do with this story right now*
Jin: *arrives home at noon after his college classes*
Jin: That Prof is so screwy! I don't want to right an essay about Barney! Ill write one about smashing in his face instead! Now for some Lunch!
Jin: *opens the freezer and grabs a box of Pepperoni Hot pockets*
Jin: Yeah! Allright hotpockets! Ill just heat...huh? WHAT! THERE IS ONLY ONE! WHAT KINDA PERSON ONLY EATS ONE!?!?! BLOODIA!
Felicia: *while munching on a hotpocket* Meoooww!
Jin: FELICIA! AHHH! I HATE YOU! IF YOU WEREN'T SO CUTE I WOULD KILL YOU! *begins squeezing his anger managment squeeky head* STUPID CAT GIrl, why I aughta, I was looking forward to those hot pockets....
Felicia: Why don't you eat the other one?
Jin: WHAT DO YOU MEAN! YOU CAN'T JUST EAT ONE!!!!!!! AHHH! *opens the freezer*
Jin: Oh man, we only have turkey and ham left! Now what!
Felicia: Why not eat those?
Jin: HA! Pizza is the ONLY kind of hotpocket there is!
Felicia: Ok then, order pizza!
Jin: Pizza! You drive your dagger of hotpocket theft deeper into mine heart! I could not eat pizza without my mind thinking that the same warm cheesy goodness could be trapped in a flaky crust for my afternoon meal enjoyment.
Captain Commando: You guys be quiet in there! The Tyson fight just started!
Jin: You need to sh..
CapCom: Nevermind, its over
Jin: *walk into the living room*
Felicia: *curls up in Cap's Lap*
Cap: Hey Jin, can you go do a beer run for us?
Jin: Beer run, why I look like some kinda..
TV: We interupt this cutscene for an important announcement... Choas at Barnes and Nobles, we take you there live!!
Dan: Nice Scar Bob!
Sagat: My name isnt Bob! I dont even think you read my book! Tiger Knee!
Dan: *sends Dan flying into the coffee resteraunt* OOof!
Sagat: I would say something witty right now but a phrase eludes me
Dan: *Pours hot coffee on Sagat's crotch*
Sagat: *screams like a little girl*
Dan: Too hot for you? Hahaha! How many lumps you want? Ill give you two! One! *punches Sagat in the stomach* Two! *uppercuts Sagat in the chin*
Sagat: Grrr, your making me angry kid, TIGER UPPERCUT! *sends Dan flying*
Dan: Oh he wants to use special moves, I wasnt gonna use them but ok, ok
*on the other side of the store, kiddes are gathered around LeVar Burton, who is reading a story*
*Reading Rainbow music is playing*
LeVar: What part in the school play did Grace want?
Kid1: The Pimp!
Kid2: The Dog!
Kid3: The Pornography producer!
Kid4: Dr Wily!
LeVar: Have you kids been listening to a word I have said?
*Dan lands on the kids, killing them on impact*
LeVar: Kids!
Dan: Eh? Huh? *comes too* wha!? JORDY!!! Quick Jordy Im getting beat up you gotta fire your proton torpedos!
LeVar: What? I cant do that?
Dan: Oh no! You dont have your visor your blind without it!
LeVar: No Im not, what are you
Dan: *grabs onto LeVar* DO NOT WORRY, I WILL GET YOU TO A SAFE PLACE TO BEAM BACK UP
LeVar: Quit yelling Im not deaf!
*Sagat runs into the clearing*
Sagat: Come 'ere you little twerp! You stained my Joe Boxers!
Dan: Ahh! Gotta go! *runs off*
*Dan runs down some isle, and ducks into one*
Dan: Gotta hide!
Sagat: *runs by*
Dan: Man o man, what have I gotten into? I never knew he was so strong, I better run away before he kills me like he killed my father! Sob sob
????: Snaaap, out of eet.
Dan: Who said that?
Bruce Lee on the Cover of "The Tao of Jeet Kun Do": Yoo mast nevar give aaap, mistah Hibiki. Now, concetrate, you must strike with feeeelling, we need, emotional content
Dan: Yeah, dont worry Bruce Lee, I WILL AVENGE MY FATHER!!
*the book flies off the shelf and hits Dan in the head*
Dan: Ow!
Bruce: I said emotional content, NOT ANGER! Now twy again!!
Dan: I WILL avenge my FATHER!?!
Bruce: No, dat toooo much like Will Shatner
Dan: I will avenge my FFAAATTHHHERRR!!! *cries*
Bruce: Dats it, go gettem!
Sagat: I could have swore he was, what? A Penthouse, cool! *sees Penthouse, Chun Li is on the cover*
Sagat: Wow, thats latest one, sold out everywhere!
*Meanwhile, at Ryu's house*
Ken: So how about some Yatzee?
Ryu: Sure Ill get the game out of my closest *opens closet*
*tidal wave of Penthouse with comes flowing out, burying the two*
Ken: Hey, Ryu, why am i surounded by pictures of Chun Li spreading her Kootch with a butterknife and a sock puppet? Ryu? Ryu? *looks over at Ryu*
Ryu: *is blushing radioactivly*
Ken: Ahhh the light! Ryu your face is a Cocacola label!
*back at Barnes and Nobles*
Sagat: Mmmmm, butter *bends down to pick up*
Book: *runs away*
Sagat: What the? *gives chase*
*The Book runs to the foot of a giant wall of magazines, all smut*
Sagat: Wow, such a huge section! *stares wide eyed, er wide eye*
Dan: *appears on top of the wall*
Dan: AAAHHHAAAHAA! Burn Sagat, Burn in your porno hell! *kick*
Sagat: What? Noooo! AAHHH!!! *Screams like a little girl as the wall of porno lands on him*
Dan: *stands on the wall on top of Sagat* Well thats taken care of, now, for some entertainment *pulls on a string and brings the Penthouse to him*
Dan: *opens the book and a green light shines forth* What the? *a black orb emerges from the book*
????: Greetings, I am David! The God of Video Game perversion, and you have finally released me from my prison! You have called down the reign of David!
Dan: Hahaha, David? Your kidding right?
David: Whats wrong with David?
Dan: Nothing, *begins to walk off while unfolding the centerfold*
David: Stop right there! You cant look at that!
Dan: Why not?
David: I am the protecting spirit of video game girls! Its my job to make sure nobody ever seen any of them in any sexual situations,
Dan: I hope you never read Fanfiction.net then, some that stuff is off the hook
David: Yes, I may be bad at my job, but thats because I was locked in that book!
Dan: Thats an awful lame excuse on Oni's part
David: Shut up, plot holes are the least of your worries now! I, DAVID! Will destroy the human race
Dan: No you wont, we have too many Davids, you would kill them all
David: Ok, how about if I change my name to Billy?
Dan: nah,
David: How about Scott?
Dan: Get lost
David: Wait I can think of a good one! What about X-Orb? VampireMan?
Dan: your not a vampire
David: Uhhh, *looks at a nearby Marvel Comic, the caption on the title is "Final Confrontaion with Abyss!*
David: What about Abyss?
Bystander1: WHAT? ABYSS!!?!?!? RUNNN!!!!!!
Bystander2: ABYSS WILL KILL US ALL!!!!!!
Reporter: Abyss destroys the world, film at eleven!
Dan: Your name is still David
David: The news has reported me as Abyss!
Dan: So, lots of times they report me as gay
David: Whats wrong with being gay?
Dan: Is their something wrong with not being gay?
David: Why are you wearing pink then?
Dan: During my training I had laundry duty, and I accidently washed one of Ryu's gis with Ken's, so they gave it to me and Ryu got a new one.
David: Your not gay? Awww what a let down, I guess I better go destroy the world then, if your not gay *flies away*