One century later, Ursula's Great Aunt Magma was sitting on a rock (Magma is a fairy god mother, and therefore immortal.) When a handsome prince walked up beside her.

"Hail, fair maiden!" He greeted Magma, "What is in yonder house?"

Magma told him.

"Ah! A handsome prince! How appropriate. For I am Prince Charming, one of the handsomest men ever to live, and I am searching for a wife whose beauty will match my own!" He chuckled, "If that is indeed possible, which I highly doubt. Tell me, is this damsel beautiful?"

"Aaah, I don't know if you would call her…"

"Of course she is!" Prince Charming interrupted, "I shall rescue this princess and make her my bride!" Great Aunt Magma did not like the idea, but she finally agreed and conjured up a sword and a shield for the prince to use. As the two approached the mansion they met a guard.

"You may pass," the guard said, "If you can defeat me in sword combat." He looked very menacing.

After numerous strikes and parries the guard sliced off the prince's shoulder length platinum hair.

"No, No! Not the hair! Anything but the hair!" The prince wailed, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! I'll have you hanged for this!"

The guard gaped at Prince Charming incredulously; he could not believe that someone would make this much fuss about his hairdo.

"Weird." He thought, considering his own buzz cut.

The guard eventually let them pass, as he couldn't stand the prince's continuous bawling.

Next they came to a wall of thorns. Prince Charming put his finger to one of the thorns and squealed girlishly. "Ow! That hurts! And I will probably get a scar."

Magma banged her forehead with her palm.

They were nearly at the mansion gates when the prince trod in a puddle of mud. "Ew ew ew!" He said, shaking his hands in front of him. "Gross! Mud! And my shoes are ruined!! That is it! I am never buying silk shoes ever again! These cost me five thousand dollars!!! And I am never ever ever ever walking in the dirt again!!"

When the pair finally made it up the tower they opened the door to find a sleeping girl sprawled on the stone floor. Looking exactly as she had when she fell asleep.

Prince Charming was quite taken aback with what he saw.

Not only was she incredibly ungraceful, she was wearing a strange garment made out of a kind of blue canvas that looked suspiciously like trousers.

She was wearing heavy boots instead of delicate slippers, and there was not a petticoat to be seen.

"Where is the flowing blonde hair, and the elegant gown and the jewels? Are you sure she is even a real princess?" Prince Charming demanded Magma in trepidation.

Magma shifted uncomfortably, "Well, uh, princess, heir to the mafia, it's all the same really."

Prince Charming shrugged, "Well, if you insist." He said apprehensively, "But that nose ring is so one hundred years ago! And that hair, what was she thinking!? Well I suppose her hair is long, at least"

He leaned down and gave Ursula a wet kiss on the lips.

Spluttering indignantly Mafia Princess Ursula sat up," My God!"

"Yes, I suppose I am!" the prince exclaimed proudly.

"Argh! A girl tries to get a little beauty sleep!" She peered at Prince Charming. It was Prince's Charming turn to be indignant, "Excuse me, fair maiden, but I was trying to help you."

Seeing he was piqued, Ursula softened slightly. "Alright. Just…a little less tongue next time, OK?"

Prince Charming looked at her blankly, as if the mere notion that he was anything less than perfect was ludicrous and unthinkable.

"I have come here to make you, fair maiden, my bride." He puffed out his chest proudly. Ursula spluttered unintelligibly. Prince Charming beamed, "Naturally, you are eager and will want to start wedding preparations immediately, so as to marry me as soon as possible."

He winked at her, "Would not want someone else to snatch me up would you?" Ursula stared. Was this some kind of a joke? Some kind of bizarre game?

The prince continued, "We shall reside in this stately home. However," he wrinkled his nose in distaste as he glanced at their surroundings, "There will have to be renovations. The wiring will have to be redone, so there will be enough light to observe my reflection in various kitchen utensils and brass doorknobs."

While saying this he had pulled out a framed hand mirror and had begun admiring himself, smiling. "Now be honest," he said dreamily, "Which one is really my best side? The right or the left?"

Mafia Princess Ursula pulled Great Aunt Magma aside for a quiet chat.

"I can't marry this guy! He's a joke!"

 Magma sighed, "I know he is a little bit…"

"Egotistical, narcissistic, arrogant, conceited!"

"Well, actually I was going to say he was a bit over confident.  And anyway he rescued you. You have to marry him. It's the law. You're family wouldn't like you breaking the law would they?"

Ursula looked at Magma like she was a very dim light bulb

"Ok, don't answer that."