The Dating Experiment Gone Wrong


Disclaimer: One day...soon, I will take over Japan, and I WILL own Yu Yu Hakusho! Muwahahahahaahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But sadly today is not that day...not yet anyways. *evil grin*


(A/N: Okay, enjoy and have a good laugh while reading this fic, much OOCness and there is yaoi in this fic, male/male relations, If you don't like that sort of stuff well don't come crying and complaining to me, you flame me about that, I'll just tell you what I tell you now: It's your own fault that you read it, I gave warnings, )


Chapter One: The Meddling of the Oar-rider


"I wonder- AHH! Will that little fire demon EVER stop whining!-...maybe, just maybe....I got it! I can set Hiei up with someone! But who first....you know, Keiko would be good...but she's dating Yuskue, well sheet of paper! (A/N: 'Sheet of paper' the not so frightening and quite harmless curses that one of my friends say when angry, disappointed, namely something that went wrong and interfered with her YYH obsession schedule.) I know! Ku-" Botan thought distractedly but excitedly, then a smile slowly crept onto her features as she thought of the perfect, well not exactly perfect, but good enough person to set Hiei up with.


"Oh help me Inari, she's thinking again and has 'that' smile on her face..." Kurama thought, fearing for what would happen next, because of Hiei's supposed complaining, Botan started thinking again. (which was always a bad thing)


(A/N: Hey what can I do? I can't help but bash someone when there's an opening, even one of my favorite characters such as Botan.)


Kurama thought about what she would cook up next, and how much damage control he would have to do and if it was bad enough that he would have to hold back Hiei from killing her or someone else that she used in her epiphany.


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Slowly I turned, step by step, inch by inch...away from the seemingly glaze eyed Botan as she got this horrifying perky smile and look on her face. She looked straight at me, a gleam in her eye, took a step toward me.


Now afraid that she could be deranged, I took a step back, of course, all of this was unnoticed by the rest, "Urameshi wouldn't dream of helping me, he'd just stand there and laugh. Hiei would just stand there and glare at me, what was that shrimp's problem anyway? Always complaining about something or other. Kurama...now Kurama might help me...Yeah! Kurama would! He's nice that way, always helping one of us out of trouble." But it was too late, somehow, while Kuwabara was thinking intently, (Oh the shock!) Botan had dragged him with her away from the rest, his only chance to escape...


Botan leaned in and told Kuwabara her plan, yet left out some very important details with it, Kuwabara, being the baka he is, agreed to her plan of...'The Dating Experiment'.


(Dun dun dunnnnnnnnn!!!!)


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The next morning....


Hiei woke up slowly, taking in air perfumed with the sweet scent of roses...opening one a mere slit he peaked to see a river of crimson hair strewn out across the pillow and onto his shoulder.


Seeing that the red-head was still asleep, Hiei nestled in closer to his kitsune, reveling in the pleasure on being able to let his guard down, knowing he was safe, in Kurama's arms.


(A/N: Can't we just all say: AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!)


Sighing in his sleep, Kurama rolled to his side unconsciously slipping his arms around his little fire demons' waist, cuddling in closer.


Hiei smirked to himself, running his hand through the silky flowing crimson strands of the kitsune's hair.


Hiei closed his eyes, still smirking, as his fox wrapped his arms around him, still asleep.

Uttering a soft ,"Hn" Hiei slowly entwined his arms through Kurama's and around Kurama's waist, ready to go back to sleep when he felt his fox stir.


"Mmm...good morning Muffin...have a good sleep?" Kurama greeted sleepily.


"Yes, very good Foxy..." Hiei murmured, lifting a corner of his mouth, eyes still closed.


(A/N: Ah...the OOCness continues on...guys, this'll be one strange fic, another reason that this IS a parody fic, and go ahead and laugh at the nicknames if you want, it's inevitable, my friend and I were laughing as we made them up, it gets worse trust me.)


Kurama chuckled softly and kissed Hiei lightly, and teasingly pulling a strand of his hair down and watching it fling back up, into it's arrangement of pointy but surprisingly soft spikes.


Hiei mock scowled at him and winded his fingers around on of Kurama's crimson locks and asked him, "Just what am I going to do with you Foxy Mama?"


"I don't know, but I think we could come up with something..." Kurama said slyly with a foxy grin.


(A/N: Oh kami I just about died laughing when I put 'Foxy Mama' in there, oh and Muffin, christ what am I going to do with all this insanity? How about write some more.)



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And somewhat thankfully later that day near evening....


Hiei's POV


The annoying oar-rider came and disturbed my time alone while sitting in a tree, how dare she, baka bubble-headed, perky.....girl. Somehow she got me to follow her, or she more like dragged me to some place, well, she's dragging me there right now anyway...from my precious foxy mama...I will have revenge on you Botan.


Finally we arrived at some shop...with...what was that word again...? Ah yes: coffee. I don't know how ningens can drink that stuff, it smells horrible, and it must taste even worse.


So we were at some Coffee Shop...I wonder if there was a point to this? Probably not, but if so, then a very small and pointless point at that. Why again did I let this stupid girl drag me here again?


I spotted a certain red-headed oaf in the corner of this ningen infested shop, oh how I hate crowded places, oh how I hate Kuwabara as well. Botan leads me over the dim witted boy and lightly pushes me down into a chair by my shoulders, I give her my most deadliest of all deadly death glares and hopes that she drops in a dead faint from fright, but all be damned, she won't meet my glare. She looks at Kuwabara instead, who seems to not be confused for once in his life, which clearly amazes me but I do not show any outward emotion of it.


"Well, I seem to have to go, you two have a good time now." Botan said perkily and winked at the two, leaving the to themselves in the coffee shop.


I then turned my deadliest of all deadly death glares to Kuwabara, and demanded to know what was going on.

Then, it seemed to have struck Kuwabara's teeny unintelligence ridden brain on what Botan had done, but apparently, with no such luck, so we both ended up just sitting there, in silence, me still glaring at the baka and wishing that I could just be back at my fox's, with him...


"What's your problem shrimp?" Kuwabara's annoying voice intercepted the quite pleasing thoughts that I was having at the moment. My head snapped up at him, my eyes narrowed,

"What. Do you mean?" I countered, not keen on having a conversation with 'this' boy.


"I mean...why are you always so grumpy? And always complaining? It's annoying and kinda useless ya know." The oaf did look at least a little sincere...


"Hn. None of your business." I retorted.


The baka just leaned back in his chair and smirked, arms folded across his chest. What was he up to....?



Well, on second thought, if he wanted an answer so badly, maybe I'll give him one,

"Stay away from my sister..." I grumbled.


"Huh? You have a sister?" was Kuwabara's lame response.


Why again am I even here? "Yes baka, I have a sister, stay away from her, stay away from Yukina."


"Yukina-san!" Kuwabara's eyes got all glittery and crap at the mere thought of my sister, hn, I hate him. Then he realized it, or so I thought...


"...huh? But, Yukina-san can't be related to you at all! She's not ugly! And any sister of yours has got to look like they've been beaten by the ugliest ugly stick!"


Now this didn't make me mad, well, not really, it's just another one of his lame-ass taunts again...


"Hn. She is, baka, and I want you to leave her alone, or I will make you..." I love the way I can make my voice sound all deadly and cool, it's so fun, and I glared at him more to make the threat more...threatening.


"Hmph. Not likely." The stupid human responded, he really wanted a death wish didn't he?


I should have smote him, I should have smote him good, but he was saved by that annoying, yet less annoying boy Yusuke. Damn him.


"Hey Hiei, Kuwabara. Oh hey Hiei, Kurama's looking for you, didn't say why, just said it was urgent." I was gone in a flash, I was so excited, I would get to see my fox tonight after all.










And now finally the end of the first chapter. So how did you all like it? Please review, and I'll post another chapter if I get some good reviews.