Chapter Four: Here I Am in My Little Bubble

Naraku hadn't given them much of a chance to relax over the next week. Hell, for that matter, neither had Kouga nor Sesshoumaru. The latter had surprised them with his presence at daybreak, demanding information in the form of Naraku's whereabouts. It seemed that Rin had been kidnapped once again by Kohaku-kun, much to Sango-chan's chagrin. Astonishingly, Inu-Yasha's normally curt brother had been more concerned about the girl's welfare than of revenge. What could they tell him though? He knew as much as them.

Even more unexpectedly, Sesshoumaru had stayed near their camp, and neither brother was fighting.

Much less talking. Sesshoumaru was preoccupied undoubtedly, and Inu-Yasha just appeared…well, depressed.

She could be called an utter fool if she pretended to not know the reason.

The rest of the growing pack knew what was going on, even if they behaved otherwise. The only person who'd dared to ask was Miroku-sama, and Sango-chan had promptly smacked him with Hiraikotsu.

Sighing, she had turned her attention back to her uneaten miso soup. How much had she hurt him? It couldn't be that bad…could it? After all, this was Inu-Yasha who was always dismissing romance and "pretty words" as useless babble to him.

Still….

And then Kouga-kun had shown up, sweeping her into his overprotective arms, and Inu-Yasha was acting like his old self again.

Except he acted more calloused this time. Like he really did expect Kouga to run off with her as his mate.

It hadn't lasted long enough though. Kouga had hastily admitted that he'd been told of a child matching Hakudoshi's description in a nearby village, and he had a "motherly" companion with him who could only be Kagura. Soon everyone was heading in the said direction.

And now, she was resting in Miroku-sama's arms, listening as Kouga and Inu-Yasha bickered yet again. Her head throbbed a continuous beat along to their skirmish.

"Inukkuro, she'd be fine if you'd been watching out for her! Really, chikushoume, you are worthless!"

"Shut the hell up, wimpy wolf! I was protecting her, but as usual, you got in the way!"

"We're fighting Naraku--not each other!" she heard Sango hiss.

"Simpletons." That had to be Sesshoumaru.

Enough was enough, dammit. She just couldn't sit by while they continued to argue like two spoiled children struggling for possession of the last treat! It was exactly as Naraku wanted it; she realized that. The focus was to be on her safety instead of what he was up to. Iie! She refused to wait idly as they were once more suckered into his game. She was so sick of being the pawn of every creature residing in the Sengoku Jidai! She would not stay there, doing nothing, while Naraku used her and tossed her aside like a raggedy old doll!

Her body moved without persuasion, forcing her aching limbs to move in Hakudoshi-Naraku's direction. Somehow, she knew that he saw her coming, but it wasn't in her to care, because deep inside of her soul, something was whispering to her. Something was calming her even now, asking her to believe--believe that it had to be her and only her to stop Naraku, but really, she needed no cajoling. She'd always known it had to be, even if she denied herself the cold knowledge. Everything must end by her hand; the hand that had started the whole tedious process, time and again, in this life and the previous.

Nodding to herself, she stiffened and gathered her remaining strength in an attempt to gain control before she marched toward her destiny.

Voices called to her, but she chose to ignore those pleas. They had to understand! She'd vainly hoped that they would realize on a primal level that it had to be her. As much as she hated to acknowledge it, the fact was that over the past few days, she had reflected on her confrontation with Inu-Yasha, and she'd discovered a few things about herself while meditating that she'd never bothered to see before.

She couldn't escape the Kikyou side of herself.

Her mind had been trying to tell her all along through Kikyou's soul that whether she wanted it or not, she wouldn't be there without the miko.

And perhaps it wasn't Inu-Yasha's fault for looking at her and only seeing his dead lover. Maybe…as much as she denied it…maybe it wasn't Kagome who yearned for Inu-Yasha.

It wasn't the first time it had occurred to her that her love for him could just be something leftover from Kikyou's lingering spirit.

She also realized that it was Kikyou and her who'd set the current events in motion, and what Kikyou had tried to start fifty-something years before, she needed to finish. Only her miko powers would destroy Naraku and his offspring, once and for all.

No longer did fear have a place in her. She could die, but what was life? Was the life she owned now really her own? Or was fate offering Kikyou another chance through her?

Sadly, without Kikyou's death, there would be no Kagome, and if she failed to complete the task before her, their joined soul would be reincarnated again and again…doing the same task over until it was finally done.

The reality of everything hurt her to no end, but it was her fate, no matter how bitter the taste. To the Kami-sama of the universe, she was just a solution to the foulest plague. When all was over, she would die, as Kikyou had.

But she couldn't even allow herself the luxury of believing that she--Kagome--would be mourned and missed because it wouldn't be a true death…it wasn't even a real life. Not hers to own.

Nothing, it seemed, was hers to own. Down to the very heart pumping with her chest.

Glumly, she raised the bow and arrow to strike, slightly aware that Inu-Yasha was screaming something at her, and Kouga-kun was speeding towards her, but before she could stop them, Hakudoshi-Naraku said it for her.

"You are still alive, aren't you, Kikyou?"

The others looked at her in confusion while she affirmed Hakudoshi-Naraku's suspicions with a small nod. "That clay shell you broke was my hatred, passion, and frustration--just a fragment of my entire soul. I truly never left this body."

He bowed, and suddenly, the air was polluted with the sound of cackling. "Kukuku, so you've come finally to finish this."

With steady hands, she pulled the arrow tautly. She could feel the presence of her friends, radiating behind her, and Kouga-kun and Inu-Yasha were at different sides of her. Sorrowfully, she avoided eye contact as she whispered, "You know that I must."

"What is he talking about, Kagome?" Inu-Yasha's wavering voice floated through her ears.

The arrow never left its target as she answered, "I have to be the one to destroy Naraku. When I was Kikyou, I started this by harboring Onigumo in that dank cave, tending to evil like it was my own child, suckling at my breasts." She laughed when she saw the irony of the situation. "And look now! He's a child in every sense of the word!"

The arrow released of its own accord and struck through Hakudoshi-Naraku's right shoulder, pinning him to a wooden hut wall that stood behind him. He smirked. "So do you intend on killing me the same way you destroyed your beloved hanyou?"

Another arrow hit its mark, slicing through his left leg with a hiss. "As much as you want me for your own corrupted reasons, nothing will ever take away my love for Inu-Yasha."

Said hanyou uttered a small huff from behind her.

Inwardly, she cursed herself but then laughed. In the face of death, she wore so much courage. Too bad it was pointless.

"You know that you will die with me here."

With tears falling from her eyes, the next arrow soared through the air and into his neck. "I have accepted my fate. Do you accept yours?"

A hand grabbed her left shoulder, and she turned to see Inu-Yasha's fear-stricken face staring back at her. "Kagome, you can't!"

"And she won't!" Naraku bellowed as he raised his arms into a threatening position.

Fierce energy cut through the air and gripped her heart, sending her reeling to the ground in mind-boggling pain.

"Iie!!" she heard everyone scream, though their voices sounded thick, like they were coming through muddy water.

Then she watched as Inu-Yasha bared Tetsusaiga and called upon its power. He flew through the air, wielding it like a madman.

"Kaze no Kizu!!"

What was he doing??

She tried to sit up to see but fell to the ground with a cry of pain.

Vaguely she was aware that Sango and Miroku were with her. "Kagome-sama! Do not move!" Miroku pleaded with her.

Shippou was sobbing. "Kagome-mama!"

"Minna…," she muttered weakly, "what is he doing?" She had heard his shouts of frustration and worse--pain, and the sounds of Sesshoumaru using Toukijin to get answers to Rin's location. "They…you must…tell them. They can't…it has to be me. Can't you see that?" She coughed, and pain seared through her chest, reducing her to a whimper.

"Kagome-chan, your intentions are noble, but you are in no condition to carry on this battle," Sango told her bluntly; fear and concern wore heavily in her voice.

"Inu-Yasha…stop!" she tried to yell, but it was as powerful as a yelp to her ears.

Miroku shook his head solemnly. "I don't think he can, Kagome-sama. He is fighting--"

"Like a man possessed!" she interjected.

"Like a man fighting for the woman he loves," Miroku finished.

That pierced her heart tighter than any power from Naraku could. She had to save Inu-Yasha before he did something stupid!

Ignoring the protests of her body, mind, and the people she cared about, she rose from the ground and struggled over toward the ongoing scuffle.

Hakudoshi-Naraku snorted. "Odorokubeki, miko. How powerful are you?"

"Enough to end you," she spat brutally.

The smile faded from his lips. "You should have stayed dead!" Energy crackled and glowed throughout him. She could feel the hatred and sick love pulsating in him; it was thick like congealed blood.

Inu-Yasha ducked in front of her, holding Tetsusaiga against Naraku's body. "Kagome! Let me finish this! Run!"

Undauntedly, she raised another arrow and warned, "Get out of the way."

He then swept her into his free arm, and she noticed the tears in his dull, gilded eyes. With a tiny cry from the back of her throat, she used a finger to touch his wet cheeks. Only one other time before then had she seen him cry for her. The time they'd been poisoned…the time he'd been scared that she'd died, he had shyly admitted to her later when they were alone.

"I won't lose you," he said through gritted teeth.

A faint smile graced her lips, and she tugged lovingly on a lock of his beautiful, silver hair. "Inu-Yasha…I promise you that I won't die." A lie. She knew that. She was certain that he knew that as well, but it was something so simple…something that made her feel like she was bound to him with those words. As long as she believed it, she could make him believe it, dammit, and then she could do her duty, letting the fates do with her as they pleased.

He nodded and hugged her to him, like doing so would keep her immobile. "You say you won't…," he choked out, then paused; looking deeply into her eyes with some of his former attitude back, "and know that I'll be forced to protect your miserable ass, just like always." He stared, waiting for her to say something--daring her to antagonize him, to say "the word," but she kept smiling as she pulled her face closer to his. He was caught completely off guard as she kissed him; a funny sight he was, thrashing about miserably while locked to her lips. Soon enough though, he relaxed and began to kiss her back. Tongues danced wildly in passion-heated mouths, and it seemed like ages to Kagome before she could finally come to her senses. Praise Kami-sama! He was such a remarkable kisser!

Now if only she could live long enough to experience it again.

Muscles trembled with immense drive as they worked to move her tired body again. Each attempt made them cry and ache in protest, but she pushed on until she was able to walk once more. With nimble grace, she plucked another arrow from the pouch and steadied the bow, aiming for her next target--Naraku's inhuman heart.

Live or die. How she wanted to make the choice herself, but it was unfeasible. Only Western fairytales ended "happily ever after." She could feel the truth coursing through her veins, and in true Nihongo fashion, at the end of this tale, someone would die. Quite sure it would be her.

How easy it would be to simply undertake her destiny, but true to her nature, she had always been stubborn to a fault. Death was simply unacceptable. Love would have to find a way to win.

Thoughts flooded her mind. Ideas, plans. Finally, she understood, remembering something said long ago by her younger, naïve self.

Live…I want to live.

The arrow sailed through the air; its direction clear only to it and the one who'd released it.