Disclaimer: I do not own X-men or any of the characters, if I did, I would
be freakishly rich, but unfortunately they are the sole property of Marvel.
The Wolverine within the Logan: The Beast within the Beauty
Chapter 6: More Than You Know
Jubilee looked intently in the mirror one last time and sighed. She felt like a kid and the mirror was only reaffirming her belief. Wolverine would never see any beauty in her different, Asian face. She turned and walked quietly and dejectedly out of the bathroom.
Jubilee looked at the mess in her room with a look of dismay written clearly on her face. She knew she couldn't sleep in the middle of this mess. She also knew that Wolvie's room was out of the question. Not that she would have minded sleeping next to Wolvie, in fact, she was sure that she would have more than enjoyed it. She decided instead to sleep in the rec room, on the large, overstuff couch that was planted there. She had fallen asleep on that couch more then once, while she was watching T.V. or studying, so she knew she would at least be comfortable tonight.
Jubilee headed down the hall, towards the rec room, when she suddenly stopped and looked down at her shirt. She frowned, her nose crinkling up. She didn't want any of the kids or Wolvie for that matter, waking up earlier then her and seeing her in Wolvie's old shirt. Everyone in Xavier's school knew how much Jubilee was in love with Wolverine, and it was bad enough knowing that he didn't want her, she didn't want everyone thinking that she was so desperate.
She padded softly back to her room, and grabbed a semi-clean, crinkled tank top. She dressed quickly in the dark, then tiptoed past Wolvie's door, to the rec room.
She laid down, and gently closed her heavy eyes. Within moments she was fast asleep, after all it had been an exhausting day for Jubilee.
****
While Jubilee was languishing in a dreamland where Wolverine loved her, Wolverine was still pacing angrily around his room, trying to rid himself of the demons that would not let him forget the angel.
"Gad I can't stay here!" Wolverine realized viciously, her smell and her presence was driving him crazy. He had to fight his urge to run to Jubilee's room and kiss her into submission every moment, and it was an impossible battle to win.
He grabbed the small bag that he always had packed and ready to go, just in case the urge to run hit him. He grabbed some more shirts off the flimsy plastic hangers, breaking more then a few in the process. He packed quickly and silently, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. He had a feeling that he would not be back for some time.
He opened the door silently and began down the black hall, heading towards his escape. He stopped, and he turned, his eyes looking longingly in the direction of Jubilee's door, a few feet away from his own. "Maybe I should go tell Jubes that I gotta be goin', shes gonna wonder where I went." he reasoned with himself, imagining her asleep on her bed, the way she had been asleep on his this morning. His feet took an involuntary step in her direction. He stopped, and turned away, ashamed. He knew the exact reason of why he wanted to go see Jubilee, and it was not to say goodbye.
Wolverine knew he had to leave now. If he even so as came near her again, he knew, knew with all that he was, that he would not be able to control himself. He had to protect Jubilee and leave, leave now with no goodbyes said.
He closed his eyes, with agony painfully obvious on his face, having no need to hide it in the pitch-blackness. He swallowed, his Adam's apple rising and falling. He took a step away from Jubilee's room, away from Jubilee. The slow and deliberate steps he took became consistently harder with each step.
Wolverine stopped, and sniffed the air, his entire body alert. He could have sworn that Jubilee's smell was not fading the way it should be. If anything, it was getting stronger. Wolverine stopped at the entrance of the rec room. Her smell was overwhelmingly strong now, and it was not just in his imagination. He walked into the rec room, his keen eyes straining in the darkness.
He spied her. Jubilee. That was why her smell had become so overwhelming. He had been walking closer to her with each step that he had taken. He swore softly to himself. He had known all along in the back on his mind that she would not have slept in her room. If it had been empty for a year, it would have been filled with dust, and one thing that Jubilee absolutely could not stand was dust.
He looked longingly at the shadow of her sleeping form. His conscience became detached with his body. He knew nothing. Not right or wrong, only the overwhelming need to go closer to the sweet body that held the sweeter mind and heart. His Jubilee.
He took a step, and another, and another, until he was looming over her luscious, sleeping form. He inhaled deeply, only his face betraying the extent of the sweetest ecstasy that he was feeling. He wanted her. He needed her. He loved her. Wolverine finally admitted it to himself, bitterly. He loved her and he could, would never have her.
He wouldn't allow himself to wake her up. He wanted to. He wanted to take her into his arms and kiss her until she begged him to stop. He hadn't felt such strong emotions since. . . never. He had never felt such strong emotions.
He tore himself away, his heart breaking in a way he never believed possible, broken in a way that his healing could never fix. He turned away, then stopped, and viciously broke off the necklace that held his dog tags. He leaned over her sweet body, giving himself an excuse to feel her close to him one last time. He gently, ever so gently, laid his dog tags, the only link he had to his past, and his hand over her heart. Wolverine leaned forward, and pressed his rough, stubbly cheek against her smooth, womanly one. He turned his head and quietly kissed her soft cheek, and murmured, "I'll miss ya Jubes, more then you know." He breathed in her intoxicating scent one last time and stood up. He looked longingly at her then left abruptly. Soft daylight was beginning to break through the windows.
****
As Wolverine's heart was breaking, Jubilee was having the most delicious dream ever. Wolverine had stood over her, and then he had kissed her. She smiled in her sleep, not realizing that it had been real. She reached her heart, where Wolverine had gently laid his hands, and felt hard, cool metal. This was just enough to jot her awake. Her eyes snapped open, her mind beginning to panic. She lifted her head slightly and looked at the object she had in her hand. There was just enough light to see what it was: Wolverine's dog tags.
Jubilee bolted up to a sitting position, her blanket laid forgotten on the cool, wooden floor. Her eyes reflected worry and they swung over to the door, and she knew it. Wolverine was gone. Gone again without letting her say goodbye. A silent tear dropped from the tips of her eyelashes, then another, and her heart broke all over again. She angrily brushed the tears away. She didn't need him. She didn't need to let him hurt her ever again.
The Wolverine within the Logan: The Beast within the Beauty
Chapter 6: More Than You Know
Jubilee looked intently in the mirror one last time and sighed. She felt like a kid and the mirror was only reaffirming her belief. Wolverine would never see any beauty in her different, Asian face. She turned and walked quietly and dejectedly out of the bathroom.
Jubilee looked at the mess in her room with a look of dismay written clearly on her face. She knew she couldn't sleep in the middle of this mess. She also knew that Wolvie's room was out of the question. Not that she would have minded sleeping next to Wolvie, in fact, she was sure that she would have more than enjoyed it. She decided instead to sleep in the rec room, on the large, overstuff couch that was planted there. She had fallen asleep on that couch more then once, while she was watching T.V. or studying, so she knew she would at least be comfortable tonight.
Jubilee headed down the hall, towards the rec room, when she suddenly stopped and looked down at her shirt. She frowned, her nose crinkling up. She didn't want any of the kids or Wolvie for that matter, waking up earlier then her and seeing her in Wolvie's old shirt. Everyone in Xavier's school knew how much Jubilee was in love with Wolverine, and it was bad enough knowing that he didn't want her, she didn't want everyone thinking that she was so desperate.
She padded softly back to her room, and grabbed a semi-clean, crinkled tank top. She dressed quickly in the dark, then tiptoed past Wolvie's door, to the rec room.
She laid down, and gently closed her heavy eyes. Within moments she was fast asleep, after all it had been an exhausting day for Jubilee.
****
While Jubilee was languishing in a dreamland where Wolverine loved her, Wolverine was still pacing angrily around his room, trying to rid himself of the demons that would not let him forget the angel.
"Gad I can't stay here!" Wolverine realized viciously, her smell and her presence was driving him crazy. He had to fight his urge to run to Jubilee's room and kiss her into submission every moment, and it was an impossible battle to win.
He grabbed the small bag that he always had packed and ready to go, just in case the urge to run hit him. He grabbed some more shirts off the flimsy plastic hangers, breaking more then a few in the process. He packed quickly and silently, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. He had a feeling that he would not be back for some time.
He opened the door silently and began down the black hall, heading towards his escape. He stopped, and he turned, his eyes looking longingly in the direction of Jubilee's door, a few feet away from his own. "Maybe I should go tell Jubes that I gotta be goin', shes gonna wonder where I went." he reasoned with himself, imagining her asleep on her bed, the way she had been asleep on his this morning. His feet took an involuntary step in her direction. He stopped, and turned away, ashamed. He knew the exact reason of why he wanted to go see Jubilee, and it was not to say goodbye.
Wolverine knew he had to leave now. If he even so as came near her again, he knew, knew with all that he was, that he would not be able to control himself. He had to protect Jubilee and leave, leave now with no goodbyes said.
He closed his eyes, with agony painfully obvious on his face, having no need to hide it in the pitch-blackness. He swallowed, his Adam's apple rising and falling. He took a step away from Jubilee's room, away from Jubilee. The slow and deliberate steps he took became consistently harder with each step.
Wolverine stopped, and sniffed the air, his entire body alert. He could have sworn that Jubilee's smell was not fading the way it should be. If anything, it was getting stronger. Wolverine stopped at the entrance of the rec room. Her smell was overwhelmingly strong now, and it was not just in his imagination. He walked into the rec room, his keen eyes straining in the darkness.
He spied her. Jubilee. That was why her smell had become so overwhelming. He had been walking closer to her with each step that he had taken. He swore softly to himself. He had known all along in the back on his mind that she would not have slept in her room. If it had been empty for a year, it would have been filled with dust, and one thing that Jubilee absolutely could not stand was dust.
He looked longingly at the shadow of her sleeping form. His conscience became detached with his body. He knew nothing. Not right or wrong, only the overwhelming need to go closer to the sweet body that held the sweeter mind and heart. His Jubilee.
He took a step, and another, and another, until he was looming over her luscious, sleeping form. He inhaled deeply, only his face betraying the extent of the sweetest ecstasy that he was feeling. He wanted her. He needed her. He loved her. Wolverine finally admitted it to himself, bitterly. He loved her and he could, would never have her.
He wouldn't allow himself to wake her up. He wanted to. He wanted to take her into his arms and kiss her until she begged him to stop. He hadn't felt such strong emotions since. . . never. He had never felt such strong emotions.
He tore himself away, his heart breaking in a way he never believed possible, broken in a way that his healing could never fix. He turned away, then stopped, and viciously broke off the necklace that held his dog tags. He leaned over her sweet body, giving himself an excuse to feel her close to him one last time. He gently, ever so gently, laid his dog tags, the only link he had to his past, and his hand over her heart. Wolverine leaned forward, and pressed his rough, stubbly cheek against her smooth, womanly one. He turned his head and quietly kissed her soft cheek, and murmured, "I'll miss ya Jubes, more then you know." He breathed in her intoxicating scent one last time and stood up. He looked longingly at her then left abruptly. Soft daylight was beginning to break through the windows.
****
As Wolverine's heart was breaking, Jubilee was having the most delicious dream ever. Wolverine had stood over her, and then he had kissed her. She smiled in her sleep, not realizing that it had been real. She reached her heart, where Wolverine had gently laid his hands, and felt hard, cool metal. This was just enough to jot her awake. Her eyes snapped open, her mind beginning to panic. She lifted her head slightly and looked at the object she had in her hand. There was just enough light to see what it was: Wolverine's dog tags.
Jubilee bolted up to a sitting position, her blanket laid forgotten on the cool, wooden floor. Her eyes reflected worry and they swung over to the door, and she knew it. Wolverine was gone. Gone again without letting her say goodbye. A silent tear dropped from the tips of her eyelashes, then another, and her heart broke all over again. She angrily brushed the tears away. She didn't need him. She didn't need to let him hurt her ever again.