*does peace sign* Greetings, earthlings!!!
I have returned from that awful place known as... *shifty eyes, shudders*
St. Louis. *big light-up sign says GASP and all the readers go GASP*
Good job. Anywho, I'm still alive, and that's what matters. Cause I know that you all would miss me if I died, right?
...
*crickets chirping*
...
*scowls* Poo heads.
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!! I SAW "PIRATES OF THE CARIBEAN"!!! *squeals* OMG!!! Orlando was SO HOT!!! *faints* But holy crap, to all of you who have seen it, THAT MONKEY SCARED ME SHITLESS!!!
*grabs trusty butterfly net and puts Legolas in a giant jar marked "Silvanus Prince Hotus"* Goodbye, my love! I'm off to find... erm... my other love! *kisses jar, skips off*
~*One Year Later*~
*lugs in big canvas bag. Bag is squirming*
I have succeeded!!! *pulls out sharpie marker and writes "Williamus Hotus Turnerus" on a different jar* Come our darling, I won't bite... much!! *cackles, pulls Will Turner out of bag*
Will: Mother... O.o...
Me: Teeeeeheeeee!!!
Will: I want Elizabeth.
Me: *gets all scary like Galadriel* You won't be seeing Elizabitch anymore!!! *cackles*
~*Flashback*~
Me: *knocks on big door to mansion* Oooh Elizabitch—I mean, Elizabeth! It's me, your long-lost sister, Laurel Swan! (I wish my name was Laurel instead of LaurA)
Elizabeth: *opens door* I have a sister?
Me: *pulls out bazooka* Um, no. *shoots and cackles*
~*End Flashback*
Will: Dear God...
Me: Heheheheheheheee!!!
Legolas: *rolls eyes* You're never satisfied, are you?
Me: *opens Legolas' jar and strokes his lovely hair* Noperoonies. I am a member of JAMS. Jarred Awesome Movie Stars. I, of course, am the president. *puts lid back on jar and climbs up on Will's jar. Sits down Indian-style* Although, I just made it up last night... so there aren't many members... just me... oh well. *looks thoughtful, then shrugs and punches holes in jar lid after noticing that Will has passed out from lack of oxygen*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Okay, end of crap. Now on to the important stuff.
WILL TURNER IS MINE!!! I CLAIM HIM!!! To complete my collection I must wait until next year when "The Calcium Kid" and "Troy" come out in theatres... both, of course, starring Orlando. Although, in "Troy", he has sex with someone who isn't me, so I might not go to see it. Cause that would just make me sad. *big retarded grin*
*blinks* This A/N had a purpose, and I can't remember what it was... my rambling has caused me to forget it.
OH YEAAAAHH!!! I just wanted you all to know that I'm home for a week. Yay! Then I'm going to Camp Barbee. Double cool with knobs. No, it is NOT Camp Barbie, like the doll. It is Camp BarbEE, with the emphasis on the BEE. Anyhap, the day after I get home from CB I'm headed to Kentucky (Hicksville, USA) for my church's mission trip. (No offense to all you Kentuckeyians. The Bluegrass State is cool. I'm proud of myself for knowing that that is your nickname. Also, you lot have really good horses, and THAT is something to be proud of.
So, anywhoo, I'm home. If any of you guys e-mailed me and/or reviewed, sorry I didn't respond. I couldn't for obvious reasons (1. my grand 'rentals don't have a computer and 2. I don't like you. Teehee, j/k.). If I'm not as perky as I usually am (although I'm hyper right now), it's because I came within an inch of death. Yes, you almost lost your favorite authoress. (You: HAHAHAHAHA!!!)
I nearly died from boredom (grand 'rents again) and itchyness (jellyfish stings). But it's all good now because I have returned!
Well I'm almost donje. Just a couple more things.
To anyone who offered me help with ROTK: Thank you guys SO MUCH!!! I totally appreciate it. Basically I don't understand why Legolas, Aragorn, Gimli, etc. go on the Path of the Dead. Also, I don't get... erm... well basically the whole book. *blushes sheepishly* Please don't throw things at me! Eep!! *runs away as everyone brings out tomatoes*
So yeah, if you would be willing to do something like write me an overview of all the parts with Legolas & Co. in them, I will love you forever (in a friendly way, of course). Also a little surprise will be in store for you! ^__^ Teehee!
To my reviewers: Ooooh, Thankies so muchies! *huggles her reviewers* I lurve you all! X-D
To Mr. Orlando Bloom: If you, by whatever chance, ever read my stories (although I don't know why you would) I apologize for making you and the characters you play look like fools. I am just a (beautiful, blonde- haired, green-eyed, funny, lovely, smart, cute) fangirl. My address is...
Crystyna: Thankies so muchies to you especialies! Heheh! You's a cool person, and I love talkin' to you 'bout our favorite elf, actor, blacksmith, etc. And I might stick a GIRL (not an elf :-P) named Christina (with I's, not Y's, sorry) in my story if I'm feeling especially nice.
To Mr. Bloom again: Thank you for being so hot.
Ok, I think that's all! Toodle-loo! I shall write while I'm at home AND while I'm at camp, and on the mission trip if I get the chance! Cheers!
~*Laura*~
P.S. Mwah! Almost forgot. *picks up giant jars and puts them in her bedroom* My hotties!
P.P.S. I love you all!
P.P.P.S. Kenny Chesney's song "Big Star" rocks!
P.P.P.P.S. Yes I listen to country music. You got a problem with that? *threatens with fist* Good.
I have returned from that awful place known as... *shifty eyes, shudders*
St. Louis. *big light-up sign says GASP and all the readers go GASP*
Good job. Anywho, I'm still alive, and that's what matters. Cause I know that you all would miss me if I died, right?
...
*crickets chirping*
...
*scowls* Poo heads.
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!! I SAW "PIRATES OF THE CARIBEAN"!!! *squeals* OMG!!! Orlando was SO HOT!!! *faints* But holy crap, to all of you who have seen it, THAT MONKEY SCARED ME SHITLESS!!!
*grabs trusty butterfly net and puts Legolas in a giant jar marked "Silvanus Prince Hotus"* Goodbye, my love! I'm off to find... erm... my other love! *kisses jar, skips off*
~*One Year Later*~
*lugs in big canvas bag. Bag is squirming*
I have succeeded!!! *pulls out sharpie marker and writes "Williamus Hotus Turnerus" on a different jar* Come our darling, I won't bite... much!! *cackles, pulls Will Turner out of bag*
Will: Mother... O.o...
Me: Teeeeeheeeee!!!
Will: I want Elizabeth.
Me: *gets all scary like Galadriel* You won't be seeing Elizabitch anymore!!! *cackles*
~*Flashback*~
Me: *knocks on big door to mansion* Oooh Elizabitch—I mean, Elizabeth! It's me, your long-lost sister, Laurel Swan! (I wish my name was Laurel instead of LaurA)
Elizabeth: *opens door* I have a sister?
Me: *pulls out bazooka* Um, no. *shoots and cackles*
~*End Flashback*
Will: Dear God...
Me: Heheheheheheheee!!!
Legolas: *rolls eyes* You're never satisfied, are you?
Me: *opens Legolas' jar and strokes his lovely hair* Noperoonies. I am a member of JAMS. Jarred Awesome Movie Stars. I, of course, am the president. *puts lid back on jar and climbs up on Will's jar. Sits down Indian-style* Although, I just made it up last night... so there aren't many members... just me... oh well. *looks thoughtful, then shrugs and punches holes in jar lid after noticing that Will has passed out from lack of oxygen*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Okay, end of crap. Now on to the important stuff.
WILL TURNER IS MINE!!! I CLAIM HIM!!! To complete my collection I must wait until next year when "The Calcium Kid" and "Troy" come out in theatres... both, of course, starring Orlando. Although, in "Troy", he has sex with someone who isn't me, so I might not go to see it. Cause that would just make me sad. *big retarded grin*
*blinks* This A/N had a purpose, and I can't remember what it was... my rambling has caused me to forget it.
OH YEAAAAHH!!! I just wanted you all to know that I'm home for a week. Yay! Then I'm going to Camp Barbee. Double cool with knobs. No, it is NOT Camp Barbie, like the doll. It is Camp BarbEE, with the emphasis on the BEE. Anyhap, the day after I get home from CB I'm headed to Kentucky (Hicksville, USA) for my church's mission trip. (No offense to all you Kentuckeyians. The Bluegrass State is cool. I'm proud of myself for knowing that that is your nickname. Also, you lot have really good horses, and THAT is something to be proud of.
So, anywhoo, I'm home. If any of you guys e-mailed me and/or reviewed, sorry I didn't respond. I couldn't for obvious reasons (1. my grand 'rentals don't have a computer and 2. I don't like you. Teehee, j/k.). If I'm not as perky as I usually am (although I'm hyper right now), it's because I came within an inch of death. Yes, you almost lost your favorite authoress. (You: HAHAHAHAHA!!!)
I nearly died from boredom (grand 'rents again) and itchyness (jellyfish stings). But it's all good now because I have returned!
Well I'm almost donje. Just a couple more things.
To anyone who offered me help with ROTK: Thank you guys SO MUCH!!! I totally appreciate it. Basically I don't understand why Legolas, Aragorn, Gimli, etc. go on the Path of the Dead. Also, I don't get... erm... well basically the whole book. *blushes sheepishly* Please don't throw things at me! Eep!! *runs away as everyone brings out tomatoes*
So yeah, if you would be willing to do something like write me an overview of all the parts with Legolas & Co. in them, I will love you forever (in a friendly way, of course). Also a little surprise will be in store for you! ^__^ Teehee!
To my reviewers: Ooooh, Thankies so muchies! *huggles her reviewers* I lurve you all! X-D
To Mr. Orlando Bloom: If you, by whatever chance, ever read my stories (although I don't know why you would) I apologize for making you and the characters you play look like fools. I am just a (beautiful, blonde- haired, green-eyed, funny, lovely, smart, cute) fangirl. My address is...
Crystyna: Thankies so muchies to you especialies! Heheh! You's a cool person, and I love talkin' to you 'bout our favorite elf, actor, blacksmith, etc. And I might stick a GIRL (not an elf :-P) named Christina (with I's, not Y's, sorry) in my story if I'm feeling especially nice.
To Mr. Bloom again: Thank you for being so hot.
Ok, I think that's all! Toodle-loo! I shall write while I'm at home AND while I'm at camp, and on the mission trip if I get the chance! Cheers!
~*Laura*~
P.S. Mwah! Almost forgot. *picks up giant jars and puts them in her bedroom* My hotties!
P.P.S. I love you all!
P.P.P.S. Kenny Chesney's song "Big Star" rocks!
P.P.P.P.S. Yes I listen to country music. You got a problem with that? *threatens with fist* Good.