OKay...I warn you now...this chapter includes....Kurama....and...suicide attempts...*Cries*

And, no, I don't own YYH....

Chapter 4

He didn't mind the pain. He rather enjoyed the mixture of his pale skin and the scarlet liquid. This pain was nothing compared to the sorrow which tore apart his fragile ningen heart. He looked forward to the daily meetings with the blade that held so many memories. The blade, the signature of the demon who stole his heart. It sliced through his gentle skin as he cringed in pain, easing into the feeling. It pleased him, to feel pain unmatched by the depths of despair.

He was thankful that the school uniforms had long sleeves. The multiple gashes on his pale skinned arms would bring about many trivial questions that needed no answer or explanation, except for the obvious. Each scar on his wrists, brought tears. Each tear brought inescapable memories.

"Hiei, you did this...." Each time he ran the cold blade across his blood thirsty wrists, he would whisper these dear sweet words, hoping to find comfort within them.

He had started doing this three days after Hiei left. The pain in his heart had no end, and he needed something to numb it. Next to his bed lay the sword, Hiei's blurred reflection still visible. The tip of the blade, so delicate, yet lethal, just as his koibito was. Setting a tender finger on the tip of the sword, the fox cut his finger, a small bit of blood rolled gracefully down his finger. Cringing slightly, he watched the blood travel down his fingertips. This pleased him in such a way, that it soon became a craving.

Each night after his mother went to sleep after another long day of waiting, he would remove the sword which was concealed under his bed. He removed it from the handmade sheath he had made from a few old bathroom towels. In his hands, the sword was a weapon of self mutilation, something that would contort his skin into the bloody, scarred mess that it was. The handle still felt warm, as if the youkai's hands had never left it.

"No, Kurama. What are you thinking? He won't come back. He's left you forever..." Slice, through the tender skin, went the blade. "Gone....gone...." Again, the blade ripped through the skin, causing a river of blood to flow. A faint smile fell upon him as the crimson liquid slowly slithered down. "Please, let this pain in my heart fade with each drop of blood that hits the ground." Many a tear and many a droplet of blood hit the floor. He cried by the faintly glimmering light of the distant stars.

"Please..........come back........" Those were the last words he would mutter every night before cleaning up his bloodied wrists and nestling into the unwelcoming bed, pulling the blood stained blankets over his pale body.

"Come back...."