The Pirate Code Set by the bretheren Morgan and Bartholomew If ye are a pirate you are old enough to learn or know the code

1. Ye must be a pirate for the code to apply.

2. Don't stab someone in the back if ye can stab them in the front first.

3. Always finish what ye have started unless it will kill ye.

4. Cheating, it's a terrible thing if ye are caught.

5. If a woman slaps ye, ye deserve it

5b. Don't even pretend you don't deserve it.

6. It be bad luck to have a woman on board.

6b. In some cases it be worse luck not to.

7. If ye are going to commit mutiny, make sure ye captain isn't related to Captain James Sparrow.

7b. Captain, remember the captain.

8. If ye are going to be on an island, make sure the rum runners have been there.

8b. Make sure ye have something to barter with on said island.

9. If things aren't clear enough, ye obviously haven't had enough rum.

9b. For any problem, remember the obvious solution. Rum.

10. If ye are going to sleep with some one, make sure next morning they don't remember.

11. If someone invokes the right parley they must be taken to ye captain unharmed - unless of course, they want to be harmed.

12. If anything bad happens, blame the ships mascot. Anything from parrots to monkeys will suffice. That means good enough.

13. Never fight with a fellow pirates unless they started it and ye can kick their ass.

14. Never pick a fight with a pirate that can kick your ass.

14b. Instead, drink rum.

15. The older a pirate ye are, the more bragging right ye have.

16. If it's ye are the kid, pick the kid. Ye shall always have options. And rum.

17. Don't get obsessed with rum. It's not everything.

17b. Treasure is everything.

18. Anyone who falls behind is left behind.

18b. If said person is related to Captain James Sparrow, expect to see them soon.

19. Never betray another pirate. Those pirates have crews and women.

20. Cabin Girl or Cabin Boy. Both are another phrase for slave.

21. Always lock the door... ye know what we mean.

22. Steal from a pirate and ye shall regret it forever.

23. Follow ye Captains orders or leave.

24. If a woman wears a corset, do not cross her.

25. Don't get caught without ammunition.

27. Don't ask, take what ye are given and take more when their back's turned.

28. Only take rich hostages.

29. Never cross a pirates wife.

29b. A pirates wife has access to weapons and knows how to use them.

30. If ye want another woman, believe us, you'll one is enough.

31. If ye can't be humble, be violent.

32. Ye never know when an honest man will do something stupid so pay attention to your victims.

33. Always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest, honestly.

34. If someone fools ye once, shame on them. If they fool ye twice, kill them.

35. Don't try to kill Captain James Sparrow or his family, it has been proved impossible. Repeatedly.

36. Take what ye wish from those who dare steal from ye.

36b. Never take a theif's wife, it's just not worth it.

37. The Pirates Code is NOT a guideline.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Remember, we wrote the rules in the late sixteenth century and were first and second mates under the eye of Captain James Sparrow the strangest and most unkillable man we have ever known.