Final Fantasy VII
Tifa meets Jim Carrey
Written By CodenniumRed
You just KNEW this had to be Humorous.
Disclaimer: Again, there's a few parts to this. I'll save the profit for Doujinshi! Eehehe….
Final Fantasy VII: Final Fantasy VII is the source of Tifa Lockhart! Why Lockhart? Because she can make many a guy's heart flutter. Like Aeris, she's caring and sweet (with long hair); like Yuffie, playful at times (with dark hair)!
Jim Carrey: Jim Carrey is an amusing actor to watch, and extremely talented. Again, think of his as playing yet another part when being featured in this fanfiction. Since this is now all about his character development, expect more general weirdness from here on in!
The Narrator: The Narrator is your guide, your light. Learn to like him, because he likes you. A LOT. After all, before you - the reader - came along, he was lonely and only had his bottomless bag of bread-crumbed shrimp to feast upon. And NO sauce! But now, he exists in your mind too!
Chapter 2: Tennis:
The Narrator: *munch* *munch* … Mmmm… yummy, bottomless bag of bread-crumbed shrimp… with sauce! Mmmm. Oh, back are we? Good. You know who I am, right? I am The Narrator, that's who I am! Last we left off, Tifa invited Jim to Tennis after Jim asked her to hang out with him. Still with me? Hehe. Being lonely, of course, she accepted. So here we are, at an often abandoned section of Midgar. Fortunately it's pretty clean – not quite in the slums, but not far from them, either.
Tifa: So, how well can you hit?
Jim: Hmmm… lemme see *slaps own self* YOOOW!!!! *raises eyebrows* Pretty good I think….
Tifa: Um… the balls, I meant.
Jim: I'll pass that one Tifa. *o*
Tifa: … Right. I'm not so bad myself. Let's just hit it back and fourth a few times, okay?
Jim: Anything for my kind, new friend!
Tifa: ….
The Narrator: And so they go into position, Tifa picking up one racket, Jim making his own racket from his struggles of getting the gizmo out of the bag in the first place. And-
Tifa: Jim, do you need help?
The Narrator: I wasn't DONE!!!! So anyway, um… now I forgot what I wanted to say, thank you very much!!!!
Jim: No, I'll be fine. Almost… got… it… *clunk!* Ow! Now I have a headache.
Tifa: Are you sure that you can play?
Jim: Please please PLEASE let us go through with this!!!! I just need Divine help, that's all.
Tifa: Now what? -_-
Jim: *holds up racket, He-Man style* By the honor of Great Skill, I HAVE THE PO-WAAA!!!! Good luck, though.
The Narrator: Why not just address me? I'm sitting here, waiting around in the sky too! I should be 'Divine Help.'
Tifa: Yeah. Whatever. I'm serving. *throws a tennis ball into the air, slaps with racket*
Jim: … Ooooooo YAAAAAA!!!!!! *misses* Nonono, that was nooo fair!!!!
Tifa: Let me show you, you just didn't ready yourself soon enough….
Jim: Aw… phulleeeeaze… we all make mistakes, I'll get it again. Though your concern is greatly appreciated.
Tifa: *smiles* Alright, here comes ball number two. *throws another tennis ball into the air, and slaps it with her racket*
Jim: Ball-coming-hard-to-see-can-I-hit-it- *misses* I-guess-not…. -_-
Tifa: You didn't meet the ball in front of you. Here, I'll show you.
The Narrator: Wow, how romantic! She's going to his side of the court! They're now gripping the same racket. She moves his leg back, guides his right arm in a fluid swinging motion, arm crossing his body in the end. And I'm feeling like a sports commentator right about now!
Jim: By George, I think I've got it!
Tifa: Teehee… see, me showing you paid off, didn't it?
Jim: Let me try on my own *swings in the air* Wow, it DID!!!! *does a backhand in the air* Oh, YEAH!!!!
Tifa: Let's get back to playing-
Jim: Wait, a little more! *swings into the air again… forehand and backhand into one dancing motion, forehand, backhand, forehand, backhand*
Tifa: Um… Jim….
Jim: *Pulls out a small radio* This calls for some music!!!! *puts on a tune* Da-DA-da-DA-da-DA-da-DAA!!!! *swings; forehand, backhand, forehand, backhand* One, two, three, four! Erum, erum, erum, erum… dodoDADA!!!! *swings some more, twirls around* Whoosh whoosh! Eeehehehehehehehehehehe!!!!
Tifa: Why do you do these things!?
Jim: *swings* Whoosh whoosh! Huh? Louder! Da-da-DAA!!!!
Tifa: *turns off Jim's music* Why do you do weird stuff like this anyway?
Jim: C'mo-ha-ha-han!!!! I'm just trying to make good, funny memories, is all.
Tifa: Why not just act normal?
Jim: Aw, what fun is that? Not that you're no fun to be around – you are. I'm just here to amplify the FUN factor!!!!
Tifa: Whose, mine or your own?
Jim: Well both!!!!
Tifa: Jim, could you please settle down just a bit? I'd have more fun it we could actually play the game, or enter an engaging conversation….
Jim: But this IS an engaging conversation! o_o
Tifa: *pouts* He can't resist THAT….
Jim: Okay, okay! Let's play like normal! I'm sorry, Tifa. Let's just go go go GO!!!! *runs backward as fast as he can to the back of the court, in playing position… and goes a bit too far, hits the wall*
Tifa: ….
Jim: Owwww….
Tifa: *shakes head*
The Narrator: I'm getting tired of narrating for now. Don't take it as rejection, but come back later, next chapter. See what happens then. I'm going to bed. Goodnight.
