When: This takes place right after "Entropy". You know the drill, Spike and
Anya did it on the table and everyone saw it. (The nerd trio probably
managed to taped it)
Characters featured: Spike, Buffy, Halfrek, Anya, Clem, Willow, Tara, etc.
Okay, after writing that "Chosen" story (and receiving the Season 6 DVD set) I decided to write a story around Spike that was a little more... well, fun and a little further back. I know some of you are now scratching your heads that I pick last quarter-season 6 of the timeline, and right after 'Entropy' no less, to do a more FUN story, but really, I mean it. As ever, do let me know what you think.
Oh and before I forget: I own nothing, created none of these, getting no money, Joss is the man, etc etc. I tried to pretend once it was the other way around but no one believed me. Bugger.
************************************************************************
FOOLS FOR LIFE CHAPTER ONE: BAR FLY
"Yeh, you heard me!"
Willie's bar had fallen silent. All occupants stared at the same spot at the bar, where two figures stood facing each other like they had seen a western or two too many.
"I said you look like yer mum had a thing for Gnarl demons! Maybe had a thing for those big noses eh?"
The blond vampire grinned and swayed a little on his feet, like he was drunk. The tall, horned figure in front of him bristled, and breathed deep like a bull about to charge.
"Are you insulting my progenitor, you leech? She who breathed life into my warrior's soul??"
Spike pulled a face of mock astonishment and lay his hand on his chest.
"Would I do that mate? Nnnooooh *HIC*. Wouldn't do that to yer dear ol'mum.
Well...actually yeah I would of course, but only because didn't want to start about your WIFE!"
"You have something amusing to say about my soul-other??"
Spike shook his head like a little kid trying to deny he would ever take those cookies. He raised his finger and waved it sideways.
"No mate. No. Wouldn't do that, she got problems enough as it is. Wouldn't kick a lady when she's down. An' yer wife neither." At this he started giggling and had to lean on the bar to prevent himself from falling over.
The demon fumed. It's 'r's rolled like an engine when it spoke. "And, pray tell, leech.." The demon bend forward and glared into Spike's eyes. "..what exactly would those problems be??"
Spike beckoned him closer like he was about to tell him a secret.
"Well you see mate, I met her...and if the story of her honeymoon was even half true I'd say maybe she SHOULD go looking for some big-nosed Gnarls!!"
Then he burst out laughing and practically fell over. The demon in front him bared his teeth and some actual smoke came from his nostrils as he started to advance on Spike.
"O'course, I offered my services immediately, hehe, but I think I'll leave that to the Gnarls next time cuz she was hardly worth-"
The demon's fist flew and hit him straight in his face. Spike got launched through the air and landed on a table, shattering it.
"YOU WILL DIE, LEECH!! AND YOUR HEAD WILL ORNAMENT MY WALL!" the demon thundered.
The other occupants of the bar had spread out and were watching with the usual variety of responses. Some made bets, some looked fearful that the fight might spread and include them, some looked hopeful there may be something dead to eat afterward, and there were the usual shouts of encouragement. Most not in favor of Spike.
"GET HIM!" "GET THAT TRAITOR!" "KILL THE SLAYER'S FLUNKY!"
At one table at least though, someone wasn't shouting. He was leaning on his flabby-skinned elbow and sadly shook his head with a sigh. "Spike, Spike..." He scratched behind on of his long, hanging ears with his other hand. "What are you doing pal? Trying to get yourself killed?" Clem shook his head again and wished they had just hung out at Spike's crypt as he suggested, and watched the Gilmore Girls season finale.
Spike in the meantime had gotten to his feet. He staggered, wiped some blood off that was running down his nose and laughed. "THAT's the spirit, horn-face!" The demon in front of him roared and charged him. Spike sidestepped and tripped the demons leg with his foot while striking him hard against the back of the head. The demon crashed into the wall head- first and in the background you could tell by the shouts that the betting odds on the outcome had changed on the spot.
As the demon turned with a growl and Spike braced himself for the coming attack, no one noticed a woman entering the bar. She was dark haired, pretty and very well dressed. She looked self assured and her entire appearance just oozed upper class. The high heels of her expensive-looking boots clicked on the floor as she walked past the crowd that circled the fight. You could barely tell she even noticed it if you didn't pay attention. But it was clear that from the corner of her eyes she picked up every detail of the violent proceedings.
She sat down at Clem's table who cringed at the sight of the demon tossing Spike against a wall where he left a deep impression. The woman turned to Willie who stood close to their table and was biting on a washcloth with a pained expression every time the furniture got smashed. "Excuse me, could I have some Bourbon please?"
"W-what?" Willie stammered.
"Bourbon, no ice." She looked at him with a raised eye brow. "You do have bourbon I take it?"
"Uh, yes, but..."
"And this establishment is a bar? True, I'm certain it's picture can be found in the dictionary next to the term 'rat-infested watering hole' but I assume you still manage to serve drinks?" Her look made Willie feel like something she scratched of the sole of her boot, but he managed to process her request. He could tell that, like most of his clientele, she was more than she appeared to be. And in his experience, it was the ones that looked the most normal that you had to be the most careful with.
"Bourbon.r-right."
She turned to Clem who had been watching with some surprise from the moment she spoke to Willie. With the friendly tone of a Tupperware party hostess she asked "Would you like something?"
"Uhm, no...no thanks."
She turned back to Willie. "Alrighty. One bourbon, no ice. I'd request a brand but you probably wouldn't know it. Just get me something that looks expensive to you."
As Willie nodded and turned to the bar, he flinched as the sound of Spike crashing a table on the demon's head reached him. The woman turned back to Clem who was eyeing her suspiciously. She smiled sweetly at him.
"Well, hello there. I hope you don't mind if I sit here? I just wondered if we could have a little chat."
Clem's eyes narrowed and he breathed deeply through his nose a couple of times. "You're a vengeance demon." he said. "What do you want with me? I don't want revenge on anyone. Unless this is about Raknor who cheated me out of 6 tabbies, but I really don't want to give him boils or anything." He scratched behind his head and looked uncomfortable "I uh, I was kinda cheating too to be honest and I hear he had some really bad indigestion from the flee collars anyway. He always is too hasty when he eats, and he doesn't chew properly.."
"Ah, ahem, no, no, dear, this isn't about that. But impressive how you spotted me. My name is Halfrek and I actually prefer Justice Demon by the way. Many people get that wrong. You can call me Hallie. You know, I thought my nature was better hidden than that. You've got a good, uhm..nose I guess."
Clem grinned in a shy 'aw-shucks' way. "Oh, it runs in the family. My dad could smell a Siamese from three blocks down. Five if it was in hea-"
"Yes! Uhm, yes I'm sure he could. But what I wanted to ask you about is.." She looked at the fight again. The demon had Spike in a bear hold, squeezing his rib cage, and Spike slammed down his hands on both sides of the demon's head. His palms smacking down on the openings of the demon's pointy ears at the same time, nearly rupturing his eardrums. The demon howled and dropped him.
"...is that feisty gentleman over there. You are his friend, aren't you?"
Willie brought the requested Bourbon, smiled nervously and left quickly. That woman just unnerved him more than his horned and slimy regulars.
"Spike?" Clem looked at the fight. "Yeah we're buds, we hang out. We met at poker games. He's a decent fella, especially for a vampire. They can be a bit nasty sometimes."
She sipped her bourbon and looked at Spike just as he kicked the demon between its legs and it doubled over. "Indeed. He seems in a rather bad mood tonight though."
Clem sighed. "Yes, something happened tonight.." Then he looked at her suspiciously again. "Heey, wait a minute, is someone trying to get you to hurt Spike? Because I know a lot of people don't like him, but if that's why you're here you can just...."
"Oh, please!" She waved her hand in an dismissing manner. "As if I would ever lower myself to settle scores between brawling, drunken lowlifes like these." She glanced at Clem. "Uhm, present company excepted of course. You are obviously a...gentleman." Clem modestly smiled and nodded like there is no denying simple truths.
She continued. "No, I am a friend of one of Spike's..friends. And actually he and I go back as well. Way back...." She looked at a spot in the distance for a second, then snapped out of it and smiled her smile again. "And I was just wondering if I could help anybody out, so to speak. Now, something happened tonight, you say? To put him in this awful mood?"
She gestured at the fight where Spike and the demon were now just slugging it out blow for blow.
Clem looked at her for a second more with suspicion in his eyes. Then he saw Spike take a good one to the chin and sighed again. "Yeah, something bad happened tonight, and he's been picking fights everywhere. But ever since he fell in love with the Slayer things have been kind of messy for him."
Halfrek smiled elegantly and tapped her glass with her long, dark red nails. "I can imagine. A vampire and a Slayer. There's something you don't see everyday."
"No, you don't." Clem replied shaking his head. "And I keep telling him, it's a bad idea, but he'll just look sad and say he knows. He's just such an emotional guy, you know?"
"Yes." Halfrek said softly as she sipped her bourbon again. "I know."
Spike flew back into the crowd. He landed on some hairy demons and they tumbled to the ground in a cluttering mess. "Get the traitor!" one of them shouted as they stumbled to his feet. Spike growled, turned and broke the demon's jaw with one fast punch. Then a group of spectators that wanted to collect on their bets pushed him back towards his opponent again.
The demon was bruised, bleeding and panting, but still pretty much as large and fearsome as before. Spike was pretty much in the same state, just a few feet shorter. "Come on then, ya wanker. Tha' the best you got? Even yer missus packed more punch in the sack." And swaying on his feet he beckoned the demon to charge him again. He wasn't disappointed. The demon roared and swung at him. Spike dodged and slugged him in the stomach. The demon doubled over and Spike followed through with a hard downward punch to his face. The demon lost his footing and went down. Spike grabbed his horns and started smashing his face into the ground.
"Yeah that's what I said. Yer old lady! Who needed SERVICING! Cuz' that's what Spike's good for don't you know?? Servicing the LADIES! And after he's done that he can bloody well SOD OFF!"
Spike smashed the demons head downward again and again, until he caught a glimpse of Clem at his table. And he saw the woman sitting next to him. Wasn't that...?
For a moment he froze and lost his grip on the demon's horns. It spat blood and with a fast twist of it's body it lashed out with it's tail. Spike got swept off his feet. And crashed into a fallen chair behind him.
The demon got to it's feet, still spitting blood. "I WILL *COUGH* F-FEAST ON YOUR ENTRAILS, LEECH!"
Spike, still on the ground tried to get his wits back while cursing to himself. "Bloody women!" The demon grabbed his coat and yanked him up. "By my honor, you bloodsucking vermin!" He started smashing his fist into Spike's face as he spoke. "I will offer my mate your manhood!!" Spike just hung there and took it. "I will show you what it means to insult the honor of the soul-other of Vraak I'Lek of the Shybarii!" "Y-you know mate," Spike spoke through a bloodied mouth. "Ya got two problems."
"Indeed?" The demon grinned as he pulled Spike closer. "First my mate, and now me. Enlighten me leech. What amusing observations have you left in you before I rip out your heart?"
"Well now," Spike grinned. "First, you talk too much."
Faster than anyone could see, Spike's right arm shot up and smashed a bottle in the demons face. He had gripped it on the floor just as the demon had pulled him up. The demon roared at the glass shards tearing his skin and released Spike as he gripped his bleeding face. Spike quickly grabbed a wooden beam off the ground that had fallen down from the ceiling during the fight. It was about 6 feet in length, as thick as his leg and he swung it with all his strength into the staggering figure's face. Vraak I'Lek flew back into the bar, smashing two barstools and practically broke the bar itself in half as he landed. And while Willie's shouts of anguish echoed in the background it slowly tried to get up.
It's claws scraped the ground to find footing, then its head swayed and he fell back, unconscious in a puddle of alcohol, blood and wooden debris. A silence fell over the bar.
Spike managed to stay on his feet. He adjusted his coat with a drunken shrug-like gesture that was all attitude and smiled.
"And yer second problem is you're whipped" He laughed at his own joke.
"Don't mind the ladies so much mate. That way you end up buggered. Believe me, I know what I'm ta-"
Then a hand on his shoulder turned him around, and before he could see who it was, he got hit in the face so hard he crossed half the room by air before landing close to where Clem and Halfrek were sitting. Disoriented he looked up and he caught a glimpse of Halfrek looking at him. She smiled and raised her glass as if to say hello. His head swirled and he looked round and up to see who it was that had attacked him.
He saw a demon, almost looking exactly the same as Vraak. Except it was easily 4 feet taller and about 300 pounds heavier. It grinned when it spoke.
"You have hurt my soul-other, leech!" Spike raised his eyebrows when he heard the voice. "And in spite of your earlier claims I don't believe I've had the pleasure."
The demon cracked it's knuckles as it slowly walked towards him. It's voice was unmistakably ....female.
"Now, leech I believe you said something about being whipped?"
Spike's head fell back against the wall.
"Oh bollocks..." he muttered.
END OF PART ONE
Characters featured: Spike, Buffy, Halfrek, Anya, Clem, Willow, Tara, etc.
Okay, after writing that "Chosen" story (and receiving the Season 6 DVD set) I decided to write a story around Spike that was a little more... well, fun and a little further back. I know some of you are now scratching your heads that I pick last quarter-season 6 of the timeline, and right after 'Entropy' no less, to do a more FUN story, but really, I mean it. As ever, do let me know what you think.
Oh and before I forget: I own nothing, created none of these, getting no money, Joss is the man, etc etc. I tried to pretend once it was the other way around but no one believed me. Bugger.
************************************************************************
FOOLS FOR LIFE CHAPTER ONE: BAR FLY
"Yeh, you heard me!"
Willie's bar had fallen silent. All occupants stared at the same spot at the bar, where two figures stood facing each other like they had seen a western or two too many.
"I said you look like yer mum had a thing for Gnarl demons! Maybe had a thing for those big noses eh?"
The blond vampire grinned and swayed a little on his feet, like he was drunk. The tall, horned figure in front of him bristled, and breathed deep like a bull about to charge.
"Are you insulting my progenitor, you leech? She who breathed life into my warrior's soul??"
Spike pulled a face of mock astonishment and lay his hand on his chest.
"Would I do that mate? Nnnooooh *HIC*. Wouldn't do that to yer dear ol'mum.
Well...actually yeah I would of course, but only because didn't want to start about your WIFE!"
"You have something amusing to say about my soul-other??"
Spike shook his head like a little kid trying to deny he would ever take those cookies. He raised his finger and waved it sideways.
"No mate. No. Wouldn't do that, she got problems enough as it is. Wouldn't kick a lady when she's down. An' yer wife neither." At this he started giggling and had to lean on the bar to prevent himself from falling over.
The demon fumed. It's 'r's rolled like an engine when it spoke. "And, pray tell, leech.." The demon bend forward and glared into Spike's eyes. "..what exactly would those problems be??"
Spike beckoned him closer like he was about to tell him a secret.
"Well you see mate, I met her...and if the story of her honeymoon was even half true I'd say maybe she SHOULD go looking for some big-nosed Gnarls!!"
Then he burst out laughing and practically fell over. The demon in front him bared his teeth and some actual smoke came from his nostrils as he started to advance on Spike.
"O'course, I offered my services immediately, hehe, but I think I'll leave that to the Gnarls next time cuz she was hardly worth-"
The demon's fist flew and hit him straight in his face. Spike got launched through the air and landed on a table, shattering it.
"YOU WILL DIE, LEECH!! AND YOUR HEAD WILL ORNAMENT MY WALL!" the demon thundered.
The other occupants of the bar had spread out and were watching with the usual variety of responses. Some made bets, some looked fearful that the fight might spread and include them, some looked hopeful there may be something dead to eat afterward, and there were the usual shouts of encouragement. Most not in favor of Spike.
"GET HIM!" "GET THAT TRAITOR!" "KILL THE SLAYER'S FLUNKY!"
At one table at least though, someone wasn't shouting. He was leaning on his flabby-skinned elbow and sadly shook his head with a sigh. "Spike, Spike..." He scratched behind on of his long, hanging ears with his other hand. "What are you doing pal? Trying to get yourself killed?" Clem shook his head again and wished they had just hung out at Spike's crypt as he suggested, and watched the Gilmore Girls season finale.
Spike in the meantime had gotten to his feet. He staggered, wiped some blood off that was running down his nose and laughed. "THAT's the spirit, horn-face!" The demon in front of him roared and charged him. Spike sidestepped and tripped the demons leg with his foot while striking him hard against the back of the head. The demon crashed into the wall head- first and in the background you could tell by the shouts that the betting odds on the outcome had changed on the spot.
As the demon turned with a growl and Spike braced himself for the coming attack, no one noticed a woman entering the bar. She was dark haired, pretty and very well dressed. She looked self assured and her entire appearance just oozed upper class. The high heels of her expensive-looking boots clicked on the floor as she walked past the crowd that circled the fight. You could barely tell she even noticed it if you didn't pay attention. But it was clear that from the corner of her eyes she picked up every detail of the violent proceedings.
She sat down at Clem's table who cringed at the sight of the demon tossing Spike against a wall where he left a deep impression. The woman turned to Willie who stood close to their table and was biting on a washcloth with a pained expression every time the furniture got smashed. "Excuse me, could I have some Bourbon please?"
"W-what?" Willie stammered.
"Bourbon, no ice." She looked at him with a raised eye brow. "You do have bourbon I take it?"
"Uh, yes, but..."
"And this establishment is a bar? True, I'm certain it's picture can be found in the dictionary next to the term 'rat-infested watering hole' but I assume you still manage to serve drinks?" Her look made Willie feel like something she scratched of the sole of her boot, but he managed to process her request. He could tell that, like most of his clientele, she was more than she appeared to be. And in his experience, it was the ones that looked the most normal that you had to be the most careful with.
"Bourbon.r-right."
She turned to Clem who had been watching with some surprise from the moment she spoke to Willie. With the friendly tone of a Tupperware party hostess she asked "Would you like something?"
"Uhm, no...no thanks."
She turned back to Willie. "Alrighty. One bourbon, no ice. I'd request a brand but you probably wouldn't know it. Just get me something that looks expensive to you."
As Willie nodded and turned to the bar, he flinched as the sound of Spike crashing a table on the demon's head reached him. The woman turned back to Clem who was eyeing her suspiciously. She smiled sweetly at him.
"Well, hello there. I hope you don't mind if I sit here? I just wondered if we could have a little chat."
Clem's eyes narrowed and he breathed deeply through his nose a couple of times. "You're a vengeance demon." he said. "What do you want with me? I don't want revenge on anyone. Unless this is about Raknor who cheated me out of 6 tabbies, but I really don't want to give him boils or anything." He scratched behind his head and looked uncomfortable "I uh, I was kinda cheating too to be honest and I hear he had some really bad indigestion from the flee collars anyway. He always is too hasty when he eats, and he doesn't chew properly.."
"Ah, ahem, no, no, dear, this isn't about that. But impressive how you spotted me. My name is Halfrek and I actually prefer Justice Demon by the way. Many people get that wrong. You can call me Hallie. You know, I thought my nature was better hidden than that. You've got a good, uhm..nose I guess."
Clem grinned in a shy 'aw-shucks' way. "Oh, it runs in the family. My dad could smell a Siamese from three blocks down. Five if it was in hea-"
"Yes! Uhm, yes I'm sure he could. But what I wanted to ask you about is.." She looked at the fight again. The demon had Spike in a bear hold, squeezing his rib cage, and Spike slammed down his hands on both sides of the demon's head. His palms smacking down on the openings of the demon's pointy ears at the same time, nearly rupturing his eardrums. The demon howled and dropped him.
"...is that feisty gentleman over there. You are his friend, aren't you?"
Willie brought the requested Bourbon, smiled nervously and left quickly. That woman just unnerved him more than his horned and slimy regulars.
"Spike?" Clem looked at the fight. "Yeah we're buds, we hang out. We met at poker games. He's a decent fella, especially for a vampire. They can be a bit nasty sometimes."
She sipped her bourbon and looked at Spike just as he kicked the demon between its legs and it doubled over. "Indeed. He seems in a rather bad mood tonight though."
Clem sighed. "Yes, something happened tonight.." Then he looked at her suspiciously again. "Heey, wait a minute, is someone trying to get you to hurt Spike? Because I know a lot of people don't like him, but if that's why you're here you can just...."
"Oh, please!" She waved her hand in an dismissing manner. "As if I would ever lower myself to settle scores between brawling, drunken lowlifes like these." She glanced at Clem. "Uhm, present company excepted of course. You are obviously a...gentleman." Clem modestly smiled and nodded like there is no denying simple truths.
She continued. "No, I am a friend of one of Spike's..friends. And actually he and I go back as well. Way back...." She looked at a spot in the distance for a second, then snapped out of it and smiled her smile again. "And I was just wondering if I could help anybody out, so to speak. Now, something happened tonight, you say? To put him in this awful mood?"
She gestured at the fight where Spike and the demon were now just slugging it out blow for blow.
Clem looked at her for a second more with suspicion in his eyes. Then he saw Spike take a good one to the chin and sighed again. "Yeah, something bad happened tonight, and he's been picking fights everywhere. But ever since he fell in love with the Slayer things have been kind of messy for him."
Halfrek smiled elegantly and tapped her glass with her long, dark red nails. "I can imagine. A vampire and a Slayer. There's something you don't see everyday."
"No, you don't." Clem replied shaking his head. "And I keep telling him, it's a bad idea, but he'll just look sad and say he knows. He's just such an emotional guy, you know?"
"Yes." Halfrek said softly as she sipped her bourbon again. "I know."
Spike flew back into the crowd. He landed on some hairy demons and they tumbled to the ground in a cluttering mess. "Get the traitor!" one of them shouted as they stumbled to his feet. Spike growled, turned and broke the demon's jaw with one fast punch. Then a group of spectators that wanted to collect on their bets pushed him back towards his opponent again.
The demon was bruised, bleeding and panting, but still pretty much as large and fearsome as before. Spike was pretty much in the same state, just a few feet shorter. "Come on then, ya wanker. Tha' the best you got? Even yer missus packed more punch in the sack." And swaying on his feet he beckoned the demon to charge him again. He wasn't disappointed. The demon roared and swung at him. Spike dodged and slugged him in the stomach. The demon doubled over and Spike followed through with a hard downward punch to his face. The demon lost his footing and went down. Spike grabbed his horns and started smashing his face into the ground.
"Yeah that's what I said. Yer old lady! Who needed SERVICING! Cuz' that's what Spike's good for don't you know?? Servicing the LADIES! And after he's done that he can bloody well SOD OFF!"
Spike smashed the demons head downward again and again, until he caught a glimpse of Clem at his table. And he saw the woman sitting next to him. Wasn't that...?
For a moment he froze and lost his grip on the demon's horns. It spat blood and with a fast twist of it's body it lashed out with it's tail. Spike got swept off his feet. And crashed into a fallen chair behind him.
The demon got to it's feet, still spitting blood. "I WILL *COUGH* F-FEAST ON YOUR ENTRAILS, LEECH!"
Spike, still on the ground tried to get his wits back while cursing to himself. "Bloody women!" The demon grabbed his coat and yanked him up. "By my honor, you bloodsucking vermin!" He started smashing his fist into Spike's face as he spoke. "I will offer my mate your manhood!!" Spike just hung there and took it. "I will show you what it means to insult the honor of the soul-other of Vraak I'Lek of the Shybarii!" "Y-you know mate," Spike spoke through a bloodied mouth. "Ya got two problems."
"Indeed?" The demon grinned as he pulled Spike closer. "First my mate, and now me. Enlighten me leech. What amusing observations have you left in you before I rip out your heart?"
"Well now," Spike grinned. "First, you talk too much."
Faster than anyone could see, Spike's right arm shot up and smashed a bottle in the demons face. He had gripped it on the floor just as the demon had pulled him up. The demon roared at the glass shards tearing his skin and released Spike as he gripped his bleeding face. Spike quickly grabbed a wooden beam off the ground that had fallen down from the ceiling during the fight. It was about 6 feet in length, as thick as his leg and he swung it with all his strength into the staggering figure's face. Vraak I'Lek flew back into the bar, smashing two barstools and practically broke the bar itself in half as he landed. And while Willie's shouts of anguish echoed in the background it slowly tried to get up.
It's claws scraped the ground to find footing, then its head swayed and he fell back, unconscious in a puddle of alcohol, blood and wooden debris. A silence fell over the bar.
Spike managed to stay on his feet. He adjusted his coat with a drunken shrug-like gesture that was all attitude and smiled.
"And yer second problem is you're whipped" He laughed at his own joke.
"Don't mind the ladies so much mate. That way you end up buggered. Believe me, I know what I'm ta-"
Then a hand on his shoulder turned him around, and before he could see who it was, he got hit in the face so hard he crossed half the room by air before landing close to where Clem and Halfrek were sitting. Disoriented he looked up and he caught a glimpse of Halfrek looking at him. She smiled and raised her glass as if to say hello. His head swirled and he looked round and up to see who it was that had attacked him.
He saw a demon, almost looking exactly the same as Vraak. Except it was easily 4 feet taller and about 300 pounds heavier. It grinned when it spoke.
"You have hurt my soul-other, leech!" Spike raised his eyebrows when he heard the voice. "And in spite of your earlier claims I don't believe I've had the pleasure."
The demon cracked it's knuckles as it slowly walked towards him. It's voice was unmistakably ....female.
"Now, leech I believe you said something about being whipped?"
Spike's head fell back against the wall.
"Oh bollocks..." he muttered.
END OF PART ONE
