FOOLS FOR LIFE
CHAPTER 8: DISCOVERIES
Another night, another patrol.
Buffy strolled along as usual. The time had long passed that average patrols were something scary. Perhaps not even such a good thing, she reminded herself. Might dull her alertness. It takes just one second of not paying attention, and....poof, next slayer please. Or maybe not. There hadn't been a new Slayer after she died. Her friends had kept the pretense up with the bot that Sunnydale still had a slayer.
Perhaps her death wouldn't produce a new Slayer. Maybe her death called Kendra, whose death called Faith and that was it as far as her death goes. Or deaths go.or whatever. Technically, Faith was now the end of the line. Her death probably would cause a new Slayer to come. Still, somehow Buffy didn't see Faith taking over protecting Sunnydale if she died now. Well, maybe if they paid her, or had and endless supply of free vinyl and leather pants, along with too-dark lipsticks!
Ok still not quite over the Faith thing, she thought. Ah well better stay alert then, even though it's hard to do over something that you do daily and has become so easy.
And there was a vamp crawling out of his grave now. Looked like a crew-cut high school jock. Big and brawny in that 'look-at-me-I-was-the-captain-of- the-football-team' kinda way. Too bad, they're usually not the brightest. Not much of a challenge. Oh well, now for a quip and some dusting.
"Hi there. Lemme guess, she was a cheerleader."
The fledgling vampire looked up. "Huh? What? Who?"
"The vamp that bit you. Probably blond, short-skirted and she promised to listen to your touch-down stories? Should've been a dead giveaway pal."
The vampire bared his teeth and charged her. Buffy dodged him and kicked him in the stomach. He doubled over and she went for the kill. He managed to block it and knocked her over by ramming into her.
"OOF! Nice one, guess that's what I get for mocking the quarterbacks of the world."
She twisted around and planted an elbow in his face. Then she threw him off and rolled to her feet. "Still, not gonna help you pal. I know you're probably just used to wrestling big sweaty guys, but.."
The vampire stopped in his tracks and gave a hurtful expression. "What are you TALKING about? Why does everyone always do that? I sucked at sports! I was on the debate team!"
Buffy raised her eyebrows. "Oops."
The vampire put his hands on his hips in a pose of indignation. Before he could continue however, a wooden stake, thrown with superhuman strength and speed went straight through him, his dust swirling in the air before the weapon even hit the ground several feet behind him.
Buffy gave a little apologetic shrug as she walked through his still dissipating dust cloud. "Sorry about that." She picked up the stake and went on her way. Well, that had been a little embarrassing, quip-wise. And frankly, she chided herself, even if he had been a jock it would hardly have been her best ever. She sighed. She was just a little off. Everything was still off.
Well, Dawn was doing fine, Willow and Tara were doing great even, Xander and Anya...not so much. She still hadn't talked to Xander about the whole thing and Anya...well that was extra hard.
She was one of the scoobies, without a doubt, had proven herself over and over. But when push came to shove, Buffy and Willow and the others..they were Xander's friends first. And even though everyone tried to not take sides, Anya felt it and it hurt her. And she had a point.
That, combined with Willow's magic problem, had made the Magic Shop slightly less the place to be. Especially after..after......argh! Why was it still so hard to think about? After Spike and Anya had had porn-sex on the table there. Hard to do research where Anya's BUTT had been when...
Buffy gritted her teeth. Stop it, she told herself. Stop it. You're not with Spike. You're not even having former-enemies-with-benefits sex with him anymore. All over.
Still, it got to her. And it made her sad in a whole different way as well. In the beginning, after her resurrection, Spike and she had been, well, hanging out together, and it had been nice. Ever since he'd been tortured and nearly gotten killed to protect her and Dawn, she'd accepted him and his feelings. And he'd seemed to've gotten that he'd just have to live with them being unanswered. And then, after she'd returned from the dead she'd actually sought him out. It had been nice to hang with him. It was hard for her in the beginning, being alive again and he had made no demands of her, she didn't need to pretend or act a certain way. Whatever she'd been like, he accepted it and didn't pressure her.
"Friends" may have been a big word but,...still...whatever it had been, the start of the kissing-hitting-turning-into-sex-stuff had destroyed that. And she had been horrible. She used him. She told him as much when she broke it off. It was time to stop.
But he loved her. It was so strange to hang out with someone who wants you so much and act like it's just a funny aspect of their company. And now....after seeing him with Anya....what did that do to her? She did have feelings for him, she couldn't deny that. She...liked him on occasion. She felt FOR him, she'd gotten used to him, she'd wanted him sexually...god, the sex had been great. Down and dirty and kinky and....great....ahhh! It was like it was fine, being with Spike was fine, hanging with him, even having wild-jungle-monkey sex with him was okay...as long as she never had to THINK about it.
Think about what it was, what he was, what it meant, what name tag should be put on it all, where it was going... But life demands those things in the long run.
"Stupid life," she muttered. Hah, that was funny. 'Life is stoopid' says ex- dead person.
When push came to shove, it just came down to this: he had no soul. He was apparently capable of a type of loving, as much as a soulless vamp can, and he cared for her and Dawn, and well, could get a long with the scoobies to some extent, but..in the end he didn't much care in general for the world. He said once he had changed, and he had. Up to a point. But he still had not that much a of a problem with demons or evils. He mainly killed them because he enjoyed to fight. And more importantly, he had no problem watching people die. Watching strangers get hurt. He just didn't. Probably couldn't.
In a sense that wasn't even his fault, she supposed. He had no soul. It was that simple.
Still one thing turned out to be true. He had said it right after the first time they....when they demolished that building. "I'm in your system now." he'd said. And he wasn't wrong.
He was still in there
She walked along the graveyard, brooding. She came to a familiar point. If she continued in this direction it would take her right to Spike's crypt. She'd walked that path a lot in the last few months. But no more. It had been a bad habit, bad for both of them. She was curious though. Curious if he was home watching the tube, alone or with Clem.
Or with...someone else. Maybe not watching the tube.
She shook her head. Cut it out! Stop acting like you're in high school and he's asking another girl to the prom! Hellhounds would probably show up anyway if he was. That's good. Focus on hellhounds and killing them. Not on Spike with...or Spike in a tux. On a prom night! Hah, how would THAT look...not too bad probably. He dressed up kinda nice from what she'd seen. Spike in a tux. She snickered. With a corsage...after the prom...in the backseat of a car, with.....Halfrek!?
ARGH! She couldn't stand it. It kept popping in her head. The whole Anya thing had shown her Spike was capable of shall we call it 'connecting' with other women, and it had shown her own reaction to it. And now this. Halfrek and Spike. They knew each other and there had been some...tension there. And now she was sort of taking an interest.
She COULD swing by the crypt. Kinda quiet-like. After all, maybe for all she knew they were together and plotting...evil things. "Maybe Spike has gone evil again." She said to herself. "And Halfrek's telling him to start wishing mean things to me and ..and the scoobies, and the rest of Sunnydale! They could be there right now, going all out with the love-maki- .. I mean WISH-making!"
She kicked a pebble. "Damn!" Don't you hate Freudian slips.
In her head she still tried to rate this sort of thing by how well she'd have been able to 'sell' it to Giles. Even though he was gone, she still did it, and felt justified if she was able to come up with something suitable...silly really.
Still it could happen, she decided. And besides, Giles was gone and she answered to no one did she? She was the Slayer, and if she decided to investigate something, that was her call to make!
"And a little peek won't hurt. Just to be..prudent." She veered off to the left and started to walk to Spike's crypt. "So there!" she said to no one in particular, except maybe herself.
Hopefully she could manage to not be spotted if Spike was there. Those damn sharp vampire senses. "Where's invisibility when you need it?" she sighed.
She hadn't walked for more than a minute when she suddenly heard voices not too far behind her, a bit to the right. She could see Spike's crypt, not too far off. She ducked behind a particularly large tombstone and held her stake ready as the voices came close enough to understand...and recognize.
"....so that's when I grabbed the annoying little bugger, chucked him in that hanging cage and pulled him up through the roof, into the sunlight. Burned up real quick he did. Wasn't that big mind you."
"And you took over his flock then? Pretty bold, I must say."
"Yeah well, could use a gang. Had some plans. And really I'd had all the bloody chanting I could stand! One more hymn or vampire mass and I'd have chopped my own head off! What a bunch of wankers. Gotta say they didn't seem too disappointed when I got rid of all that stuff."
"Ah, I know the kind. When it's the holidays like the birthday of Frelansha the Snake-Goddess of Revenge, they're all singing and praising, in case something happens, and give YOU a hard time if you don't, but the rest of the year? They'd all just as soon hang in front of the TV while you do all the work."
That woman's voice. That was her!
"Exactly! I freed them of all that crap, gave them some good times and happy dinners, and what do I get? A bunch of wankers that couldn't keep the perimeter guarded if their lives depended on it!"
Spike took a drag from his cigarette and added "Which it usually did. Lazy gits!"
Buffy stayed knelt down behind the tombstone and frowned. They WERE together. Didn't sound like they were planning the end of the world, but then she hadn't really expected them to. She hadn't really expected to actually find them together at all. But here they were. And they sounded ...what, chit-chatty? Like they were on a date?
"They're on a date?!" Buffy said out loud to herself before she knew it. And immediately shut her mouth. THAT was smart. It had been a mumble but still....She listened but there was no sign they'd heard her.
"So is there any truth to that whole St Vigius deal? I mean I know you didn't wait for it, but if you had would you have been stronger? I always wondered about that."
"Well, on the day itself I didn't feel any different. Ah that stuff is usually so much bollucks if you ask me. All dainty talk and religious blabbing to get people to toe the line and follow your lead. And fetch your snacks for you. Me, I always felt killing a few of them and a few whacks around the head will get you the same results, without the Annoying Ones of the world."
Halfrek giggled. Now he's got her giggling, Buffy thought. And he's telling her tall tales! God, they ARE on a date!
"Oh it's the same with us over in the Vengeance Demon camp. The ones with the biggest mouths are usually the ones with the smallest input. I'm just happy D'Hoffryn is not all that into the old ritual stuff. He's very to the point, you know? Results are what matters. He appreciates high quotas and creativity. And he encourages us being competitive about it. Keeps everyone on their toes, he always says. And boy, does it ever, I mean, some people are just so tense about it you know? Just the other day, this young one comes up to me, hasn't been dealing out vengeance for more than 20 years or something and she has the nerve..."
Yap, yap, yap, yap, Buffy thought. God she was irritating. And that voice, that sweet, kindergarten teacher voice! That Spike's idea of a good time? And she's talking louder too, it seems..
Suddenly she heard a sound next to her! Her head turned up to her left with lightning speed.
For a moment she just sat there, still lurched on the ground, knees up under her chin, with her stake in her hand as she stared into Spike's face. He was leaning on the tombstone in a casual manner, looking down on her with one eyebrow raised.
"Uhm, Slayer," he said calmly. "What are you doing?"
TBC!
R&R time....hit me!
CHAPTER 8: DISCOVERIES
Another night, another patrol.
Buffy strolled along as usual. The time had long passed that average patrols were something scary. Perhaps not even such a good thing, she reminded herself. Might dull her alertness. It takes just one second of not paying attention, and....poof, next slayer please. Or maybe not. There hadn't been a new Slayer after she died. Her friends had kept the pretense up with the bot that Sunnydale still had a slayer.
Perhaps her death wouldn't produce a new Slayer. Maybe her death called Kendra, whose death called Faith and that was it as far as her death goes. Or deaths go.or whatever. Technically, Faith was now the end of the line. Her death probably would cause a new Slayer to come. Still, somehow Buffy didn't see Faith taking over protecting Sunnydale if she died now. Well, maybe if they paid her, or had and endless supply of free vinyl and leather pants, along with too-dark lipsticks!
Ok still not quite over the Faith thing, she thought. Ah well better stay alert then, even though it's hard to do over something that you do daily and has become so easy.
And there was a vamp crawling out of his grave now. Looked like a crew-cut high school jock. Big and brawny in that 'look-at-me-I-was-the-captain-of- the-football-team' kinda way. Too bad, they're usually not the brightest. Not much of a challenge. Oh well, now for a quip and some dusting.
"Hi there. Lemme guess, she was a cheerleader."
The fledgling vampire looked up. "Huh? What? Who?"
"The vamp that bit you. Probably blond, short-skirted and she promised to listen to your touch-down stories? Should've been a dead giveaway pal."
The vampire bared his teeth and charged her. Buffy dodged him and kicked him in the stomach. He doubled over and she went for the kill. He managed to block it and knocked her over by ramming into her.
"OOF! Nice one, guess that's what I get for mocking the quarterbacks of the world."
She twisted around and planted an elbow in his face. Then she threw him off and rolled to her feet. "Still, not gonna help you pal. I know you're probably just used to wrestling big sweaty guys, but.."
The vampire stopped in his tracks and gave a hurtful expression. "What are you TALKING about? Why does everyone always do that? I sucked at sports! I was on the debate team!"
Buffy raised her eyebrows. "Oops."
The vampire put his hands on his hips in a pose of indignation. Before he could continue however, a wooden stake, thrown with superhuman strength and speed went straight through him, his dust swirling in the air before the weapon even hit the ground several feet behind him.
Buffy gave a little apologetic shrug as she walked through his still dissipating dust cloud. "Sorry about that." She picked up the stake and went on her way. Well, that had been a little embarrassing, quip-wise. And frankly, she chided herself, even if he had been a jock it would hardly have been her best ever. She sighed. She was just a little off. Everything was still off.
Well, Dawn was doing fine, Willow and Tara were doing great even, Xander and Anya...not so much. She still hadn't talked to Xander about the whole thing and Anya...well that was extra hard.
She was one of the scoobies, without a doubt, had proven herself over and over. But when push came to shove, Buffy and Willow and the others..they were Xander's friends first. And even though everyone tried to not take sides, Anya felt it and it hurt her. And she had a point.
That, combined with Willow's magic problem, had made the Magic Shop slightly less the place to be. Especially after..after......argh! Why was it still so hard to think about? After Spike and Anya had had porn-sex on the table there. Hard to do research where Anya's BUTT had been when...
Buffy gritted her teeth. Stop it, she told herself. Stop it. You're not with Spike. You're not even having former-enemies-with-benefits sex with him anymore. All over.
Still, it got to her. And it made her sad in a whole different way as well. In the beginning, after her resurrection, Spike and she had been, well, hanging out together, and it had been nice. Ever since he'd been tortured and nearly gotten killed to protect her and Dawn, she'd accepted him and his feelings. And he'd seemed to've gotten that he'd just have to live with them being unanswered. And then, after she'd returned from the dead she'd actually sought him out. It had been nice to hang with him. It was hard for her in the beginning, being alive again and he had made no demands of her, she didn't need to pretend or act a certain way. Whatever she'd been like, he accepted it and didn't pressure her.
"Friends" may have been a big word but,...still...whatever it had been, the start of the kissing-hitting-turning-into-sex-stuff had destroyed that. And she had been horrible. She used him. She told him as much when she broke it off. It was time to stop.
But he loved her. It was so strange to hang out with someone who wants you so much and act like it's just a funny aspect of their company. And now....after seeing him with Anya....what did that do to her? She did have feelings for him, she couldn't deny that. She...liked him on occasion. She felt FOR him, she'd gotten used to him, she'd wanted him sexually...god, the sex had been great. Down and dirty and kinky and....great....ahhh! It was like it was fine, being with Spike was fine, hanging with him, even having wild-jungle-monkey sex with him was okay...as long as she never had to THINK about it.
Think about what it was, what he was, what it meant, what name tag should be put on it all, where it was going... But life demands those things in the long run.
"Stupid life," she muttered. Hah, that was funny. 'Life is stoopid' says ex- dead person.
When push came to shove, it just came down to this: he had no soul. He was apparently capable of a type of loving, as much as a soulless vamp can, and he cared for her and Dawn, and well, could get a long with the scoobies to some extent, but..in the end he didn't much care in general for the world. He said once he had changed, and he had. Up to a point. But he still had not that much a of a problem with demons or evils. He mainly killed them because he enjoyed to fight. And more importantly, he had no problem watching people die. Watching strangers get hurt. He just didn't. Probably couldn't.
In a sense that wasn't even his fault, she supposed. He had no soul. It was that simple.
Still one thing turned out to be true. He had said it right after the first time they....when they demolished that building. "I'm in your system now." he'd said. And he wasn't wrong.
He was still in there
She walked along the graveyard, brooding. She came to a familiar point. If she continued in this direction it would take her right to Spike's crypt. She'd walked that path a lot in the last few months. But no more. It had been a bad habit, bad for both of them. She was curious though. Curious if he was home watching the tube, alone or with Clem.
Or with...someone else. Maybe not watching the tube.
She shook her head. Cut it out! Stop acting like you're in high school and he's asking another girl to the prom! Hellhounds would probably show up anyway if he was. That's good. Focus on hellhounds and killing them. Not on Spike with...or Spike in a tux. On a prom night! Hah, how would THAT look...not too bad probably. He dressed up kinda nice from what she'd seen. Spike in a tux. She snickered. With a corsage...after the prom...in the backseat of a car, with.....Halfrek!?
ARGH! She couldn't stand it. It kept popping in her head. The whole Anya thing had shown her Spike was capable of shall we call it 'connecting' with other women, and it had shown her own reaction to it. And now this. Halfrek and Spike. They knew each other and there had been some...tension there. And now she was sort of taking an interest.
She COULD swing by the crypt. Kinda quiet-like. After all, maybe for all she knew they were together and plotting...evil things. "Maybe Spike has gone evil again." She said to herself. "And Halfrek's telling him to start wishing mean things to me and ..and the scoobies, and the rest of Sunnydale! They could be there right now, going all out with the love-maki- .. I mean WISH-making!"
She kicked a pebble. "Damn!" Don't you hate Freudian slips.
In her head she still tried to rate this sort of thing by how well she'd have been able to 'sell' it to Giles. Even though he was gone, she still did it, and felt justified if she was able to come up with something suitable...silly really.
Still it could happen, she decided. And besides, Giles was gone and she answered to no one did she? She was the Slayer, and if she decided to investigate something, that was her call to make!
"And a little peek won't hurt. Just to be..prudent." She veered off to the left and started to walk to Spike's crypt. "So there!" she said to no one in particular, except maybe herself.
Hopefully she could manage to not be spotted if Spike was there. Those damn sharp vampire senses. "Where's invisibility when you need it?" she sighed.
She hadn't walked for more than a minute when she suddenly heard voices not too far behind her, a bit to the right. She could see Spike's crypt, not too far off. She ducked behind a particularly large tombstone and held her stake ready as the voices came close enough to understand...and recognize.
"....so that's when I grabbed the annoying little bugger, chucked him in that hanging cage and pulled him up through the roof, into the sunlight. Burned up real quick he did. Wasn't that big mind you."
"And you took over his flock then? Pretty bold, I must say."
"Yeah well, could use a gang. Had some plans. And really I'd had all the bloody chanting I could stand! One more hymn or vampire mass and I'd have chopped my own head off! What a bunch of wankers. Gotta say they didn't seem too disappointed when I got rid of all that stuff."
"Ah, I know the kind. When it's the holidays like the birthday of Frelansha the Snake-Goddess of Revenge, they're all singing and praising, in case something happens, and give YOU a hard time if you don't, but the rest of the year? They'd all just as soon hang in front of the TV while you do all the work."
That woman's voice. That was her!
"Exactly! I freed them of all that crap, gave them some good times and happy dinners, and what do I get? A bunch of wankers that couldn't keep the perimeter guarded if their lives depended on it!"
Spike took a drag from his cigarette and added "Which it usually did. Lazy gits!"
Buffy stayed knelt down behind the tombstone and frowned. They WERE together. Didn't sound like they were planning the end of the world, but then she hadn't really expected them to. She hadn't really expected to actually find them together at all. But here they were. And they sounded ...what, chit-chatty? Like they were on a date?
"They're on a date?!" Buffy said out loud to herself before she knew it. And immediately shut her mouth. THAT was smart. It had been a mumble but still....She listened but there was no sign they'd heard her.
"So is there any truth to that whole St Vigius deal? I mean I know you didn't wait for it, but if you had would you have been stronger? I always wondered about that."
"Well, on the day itself I didn't feel any different. Ah that stuff is usually so much bollucks if you ask me. All dainty talk and religious blabbing to get people to toe the line and follow your lead. And fetch your snacks for you. Me, I always felt killing a few of them and a few whacks around the head will get you the same results, without the Annoying Ones of the world."
Halfrek giggled. Now he's got her giggling, Buffy thought. And he's telling her tall tales! God, they ARE on a date!
"Oh it's the same with us over in the Vengeance Demon camp. The ones with the biggest mouths are usually the ones with the smallest input. I'm just happy D'Hoffryn is not all that into the old ritual stuff. He's very to the point, you know? Results are what matters. He appreciates high quotas and creativity. And he encourages us being competitive about it. Keeps everyone on their toes, he always says. And boy, does it ever, I mean, some people are just so tense about it you know? Just the other day, this young one comes up to me, hasn't been dealing out vengeance for more than 20 years or something and she has the nerve..."
Yap, yap, yap, yap, Buffy thought. God she was irritating. And that voice, that sweet, kindergarten teacher voice! That Spike's idea of a good time? And she's talking louder too, it seems..
Suddenly she heard a sound next to her! Her head turned up to her left with lightning speed.
For a moment she just sat there, still lurched on the ground, knees up under her chin, with her stake in her hand as she stared into Spike's face. He was leaning on the tombstone in a casual manner, looking down on her with one eyebrow raised.
"Uhm, Slayer," he said calmly. "What are you doing?"
TBC!
R&R time....hit me!
