FOOLS FOR LIFE:
CHAPTER 16: STRANGE TIDINGS
Willow looked at the dinner table and took a deep breath.
Take it easy. It's just Buffy. Really.
She'd hoped Tara would stay for dinner before she went to Anya, but she was right, there was no time to lose. So it was now just her and Buffy.
Or rather, the new Buffy. The 'Spike-Buffy'.
What would that make her, 'Bike'? 'Spuffy'? Well, Spuffy was better than Bike, but....oww, okay let's get it over with. It was a good way to keep things normal, keep an eye on Buffy and keep her at home. Just have dinner.
"Uhm, Buffy?" she called out the her. "Yeh?" was the north London answer from the back porch.
Willow swallowed. "Uhm, dinner's ready."
She heard Buffy take a drag. "Oh, right." It sounded a bit like 'roit' and the 't' half-disappeared. It was just freaky. She saw her toss her cigarette into the yard and get up.
She walked in with a slight casual swagger. "So, what're we eating, red? I'm feeling peckish." She sat down on a chair. Way down. Like sitting as much on her back as on her butt.
"Oh nothing special. Some beans, mashed potatoes and pork chops. Nothing great, mostly cans and microwave." Willow forced a normal tone.
Buffy bent forward and picked up her pork chop with her fingers. "Oh, 's alright. Nothing wrong with pork chop." And at that she started munching the meat off the bone.
Willow sat down across from her and tried to focus on her own dinner. But it was hard. 'Maybe if it had been Faith, I wouldn't even have noticed that quickly, apart from the accent.' she thought. But Buffy was more...well, better groomed in life than Faith. Bigger contrast. Although even Faith made better use of napkins than this. No actually Faith was kinda...slutty....and trashy, but not butch or masculine or something. This was different.
Buffy looked at Willow in between bites. "What's the matter, pet? Wires still a bit crossed up there?"
"Oh no, I'm fine, I'm just..just.." Willow tried. Then she frowned. "NO, I don't have the 'wires crossed up there'! YOU do! Buffy come on! You just called me 'pet'! You don't call me 'pet'! You've NEVER called me 'pet'! It's freaky!"
Buffy looked at her, mouthed a slow 'oookay' like Willow just said she thought she was Napoleon or something, and turned back to her pork chop. Willow let her head fall down on the table with a deep sigh.
** **
"So she's what, bleaching her hair white now?" Anya asked.
Tara thought for a moment. "Well, she hasn't yet, but as far as I could tell it could be just around the corner. She's drinking bourbon, smoking like a fiend and, well..uhm, apparently going..uhm, 'commando'."
"Huh." Anya thought for a moment and snickered slightly. Tara gave her a mellow 'ahem' look, yet couldn't help but smile a little herself. "I know, it sounds like something from a sitcom, but it could be serious."
"Oh no, I mean, yeah, sure." Anya said. "I was just picturing it. I mean...." Then she started to giggle. "And she called you 'luv'??"
Tara gave a little sigh and nodded.
"Well now, I was kind of hoping you'd just come for some books and I didn't have to get actively involved because, you know...." she gave a little shrug as she closed up the cash register. "... I don't really want to."
Tara nodded politely. "Yes, well, I'm sure you're busy."
"Oh, not even that. It's just, well, when there's a crisis at Buffy's house, somehow these highly dramatic emotional confrontations always manage to pop up in between the demon fighting." She sighed as she put on her coat. "And I could really do without another one of those."
Tara suppressed a smile and managed to nod in agreement as Anya continued. "And Dawn always gets extra whiny, which can be really annoying. I mean when she starts with the shrieking, pffff. I didn't even think humans could go that high!"
Tara was putting several of the store's old books in her bag, as Anya turned to her and gave a sunny smile. "But *this*, I gotta see!"
"We really appreciate it." Tara said.
After Anya locked the shop, they started to walk down towards Tara's car. "So, do I have all the volumes that could be useful? I mean if Spike did put a love spell on Buffy.."
"WHAT?"
They both stopped in their tracks as Xander stood in front of them. "Spike did what??" For a moment they all just looked at each other.
"Xander, what are you doing here?" Anya asked.
Xander snapped out of his surprise. "I uh, I-I came to talk to you, I mean...how we left things last time...I just...." Anya sighed and looked to the side. "What, you want to give me more speeches about how only *you* are allowed to hurt *me*!?"
"No! No, that's not it, I just...."
"Uhm, guys." Tara said carefully. "I'd hate to interrupt, and if you guys need to have this talk now, then go ahead, but I really have to get back to Buffy and Willow. And frankly, Anya, if you know anything that can help us.."
"What's wrong with Buffy?" Xander asked, remembering what he heard. "What was that about a love spell?? Did Spike put a love spell on her? That sick, twisted.."
"Yeah," Anya muttered. "A love spell on a woman who dumped you that goes wrong. That would NEVER happen to you."
Xander didn't finish his line and relaxed his clenched fist with a slight sigh. "Alright," he said. "Point taken."
He looked at Anya and smiled sadly. "My own fault for telling you about that one huh?"
Anya's anger left her face for a moment but then she avoided his gaze again.
"But you can't have me hear the words 'Spike', 'Buffy' and 'love spell' in one sentence and expect me to NOT freak out. I mean, we saw that happen before with Willow, and, and I did that same stupid thing once and, and... I'm still reeling from the thought that Buffy...had something with that guy right in front of us and I never caught on, and..and I feel even more stupid when I think of every time I told him to shove off because he didn't have a chance with her..."
"Is there a point to this list of your moments of stupidity?" Anya said. "Because as Tara said, we have to go now. And if you're going to list them ALL..."
Xander gave her a look. "My point is, Willow once did it accidentally, and I was being stupid dumped-boy, but Spike's a vampire. And he has no soul. Who knows to what ends a guy like that goes when he feels rejected by the object of his obsession! And from the sound of it, we may be finding that out right about now."
"Well, it's too early to say what's going on but there definitely seems to be a Spike link." Tara said.
Xander frowned "You don't really know what's going on but you know for sure Spike's involved? What do you mean? He did the spell, then put his signature in the lower right corner?"
"Uhm, no..." Tara hesitated, "let's just say that if we hurry, we could still prevent her from buying a duster and start listening to the 'Sex Pistols greatest hits' ."
Before Xander could voice the 'huh' that was already apparent in his face, Anya cut in: "And grow a penis!"
They both looked at her. "What?" she shrugged and looked at Tara. "It's possible. I mean, from what you said.."
Tara thought about that and raised her eyebrows. "Not even...impossible I suppose...I mean, if it's still an ongoing process instead of something already finished..."
Xander looked back and for the between the two girls, and finally found a voice:
"WHAT????"
** **
Willow sat on the couch and looked at Buffy slouched down in her chair, her feet crossed and up on the table while sipping some bourbon from a bottle. She had been zapping along on the TV without finding much worth watching. Willow was just glad it was too late for "Passions".
Then suddenly, Buffy put the bottle down, stretched and got up. "Right. Think I'll go bust some vamp heads." Willow's eyes grew big and got up.
"No! No, I mean, we have to wait for Tara. Wouldn't you rather stay and have some more...uh, hard liquor or something?"
Buffy sighed and gave her a look. "Sorry Red, world doesn't stop for you getting all bent out of shape. I'm the Slayer."
'Oim the Slayuh'. Willow winced.
"Gotta patrol, keep the puppies and the girl scouts safe and all that. Can't be sittin' about."
She went to the hall and put her jacket on. Willow thought frantically.
"You're right!" she suddenly said.
Buffy turned to Willow with her head tilted a bit. "Really now."
"Yeah, something's wrong with me. Someone probably put a spell on me. You can't leave me alone! Who knows what I'll do! I could..."
Buffy shifted her weight, crossed her arms and raised one eyebrow as she looked at Willow less than convinced.
".....I could go all wonky and start magicking around the house! Anything could happen!"
Buffy smirked and pulled out her cigarettes. "Yeah, you could de- alfabetize all the CDs. Sorry luv, not buying. You just sit tight till Tara comes back and exorcises all your 'funniethoughts'. Got work t'do."
"But-but.." Willow stammered. Her only reply was the shutting door. She ran to it and opened it. "Buffy, wait!" She looked around but the street was empty. Damn! Did she jump back over the roof? Run really fast and jump the fence across the street? No way to tell.
She went back inside and crashed on the couch. "Well, that was useful...." Maybe it wouldn't be so bad though. She was still Buffy, and it was doubtful her ability to slay had lessened. If anything, Spike's traits would make her a meaner fighter. And she said she was just going to patrol, so she'd come back like always and hopefully they'd have something figured out by then.
"Yeah, something like that." she mumbled to herself. If nothing happened. If she didn't run into something worse than the usual vamp, something that needed slayer planning and not Spike's jumping-in-head-first-attitude.
And this was Sunnydale. Plenty of Big Bads to run into.
Willow looked up from her own thoughts. 'Running into Big Bad'.....
She felt herself pull a very awkward face.
"Uh oh...."
** ** TBC! Now R&R!
CHAPTER 16: STRANGE TIDINGS
Willow looked at the dinner table and took a deep breath.
Take it easy. It's just Buffy. Really.
She'd hoped Tara would stay for dinner before she went to Anya, but she was right, there was no time to lose. So it was now just her and Buffy.
Or rather, the new Buffy. The 'Spike-Buffy'.
What would that make her, 'Bike'? 'Spuffy'? Well, Spuffy was better than Bike, but....oww, okay let's get it over with. It was a good way to keep things normal, keep an eye on Buffy and keep her at home. Just have dinner.
"Uhm, Buffy?" she called out the her. "Yeh?" was the north London answer from the back porch.
Willow swallowed. "Uhm, dinner's ready."
She heard Buffy take a drag. "Oh, right." It sounded a bit like 'roit' and the 't' half-disappeared. It was just freaky. She saw her toss her cigarette into the yard and get up.
She walked in with a slight casual swagger. "So, what're we eating, red? I'm feeling peckish." She sat down on a chair. Way down. Like sitting as much on her back as on her butt.
"Oh nothing special. Some beans, mashed potatoes and pork chops. Nothing great, mostly cans and microwave." Willow forced a normal tone.
Buffy bent forward and picked up her pork chop with her fingers. "Oh, 's alright. Nothing wrong with pork chop." And at that she started munching the meat off the bone.
Willow sat down across from her and tried to focus on her own dinner. But it was hard. 'Maybe if it had been Faith, I wouldn't even have noticed that quickly, apart from the accent.' she thought. But Buffy was more...well, better groomed in life than Faith. Bigger contrast. Although even Faith made better use of napkins than this. No actually Faith was kinda...slutty....and trashy, but not butch or masculine or something. This was different.
Buffy looked at Willow in between bites. "What's the matter, pet? Wires still a bit crossed up there?"
"Oh no, I'm fine, I'm just..just.." Willow tried. Then she frowned. "NO, I don't have the 'wires crossed up there'! YOU do! Buffy come on! You just called me 'pet'! You don't call me 'pet'! You've NEVER called me 'pet'! It's freaky!"
Buffy looked at her, mouthed a slow 'oookay' like Willow just said she thought she was Napoleon or something, and turned back to her pork chop. Willow let her head fall down on the table with a deep sigh.
** **
"So she's what, bleaching her hair white now?" Anya asked.
Tara thought for a moment. "Well, she hasn't yet, but as far as I could tell it could be just around the corner. She's drinking bourbon, smoking like a fiend and, well..uhm, apparently going..uhm, 'commando'."
"Huh." Anya thought for a moment and snickered slightly. Tara gave her a mellow 'ahem' look, yet couldn't help but smile a little herself. "I know, it sounds like something from a sitcom, but it could be serious."
"Oh no, I mean, yeah, sure." Anya said. "I was just picturing it. I mean...." Then she started to giggle. "And she called you 'luv'??"
Tara gave a little sigh and nodded.
"Well now, I was kind of hoping you'd just come for some books and I didn't have to get actively involved because, you know...." she gave a little shrug as she closed up the cash register. "... I don't really want to."
Tara nodded politely. "Yes, well, I'm sure you're busy."
"Oh, not even that. It's just, well, when there's a crisis at Buffy's house, somehow these highly dramatic emotional confrontations always manage to pop up in between the demon fighting." She sighed as she put on her coat. "And I could really do without another one of those."
Tara suppressed a smile and managed to nod in agreement as Anya continued. "And Dawn always gets extra whiny, which can be really annoying. I mean when she starts with the shrieking, pffff. I didn't even think humans could go that high!"
Tara was putting several of the store's old books in her bag, as Anya turned to her and gave a sunny smile. "But *this*, I gotta see!"
"We really appreciate it." Tara said.
After Anya locked the shop, they started to walk down towards Tara's car. "So, do I have all the volumes that could be useful? I mean if Spike did put a love spell on Buffy.."
"WHAT?"
They both stopped in their tracks as Xander stood in front of them. "Spike did what??" For a moment they all just looked at each other.
"Xander, what are you doing here?" Anya asked.
Xander snapped out of his surprise. "I uh, I-I came to talk to you, I mean...how we left things last time...I just...." Anya sighed and looked to the side. "What, you want to give me more speeches about how only *you* are allowed to hurt *me*!?"
"No! No, that's not it, I just...."
"Uhm, guys." Tara said carefully. "I'd hate to interrupt, and if you guys need to have this talk now, then go ahead, but I really have to get back to Buffy and Willow. And frankly, Anya, if you know anything that can help us.."
"What's wrong with Buffy?" Xander asked, remembering what he heard. "What was that about a love spell?? Did Spike put a love spell on her? That sick, twisted.."
"Yeah," Anya muttered. "A love spell on a woman who dumped you that goes wrong. That would NEVER happen to you."
Xander didn't finish his line and relaxed his clenched fist with a slight sigh. "Alright," he said. "Point taken."
He looked at Anya and smiled sadly. "My own fault for telling you about that one huh?"
Anya's anger left her face for a moment but then she avoided his gaze again.
"But you can't have me hear the words 'Spike', 'Buffy' and 'love spell' in one sentence and expect me to NOT freak out. I mean, we saw that happen before with Willow, and, and I did that same stupid thing once and, and... I'm still reeling from the thought that Buffy...had something with that guy right in front of us and I never caught on, and..and I feel even more stupid when I think of every time I told him to shove off because he didn't have a chance with her..."
"Is there a point to this list of your moments of stupidity?" Anya said. "Because as Tara said, we have to go now. And if you're going to list them ALL..."
Xander gave her a look. "My point is, Willow once did it accidentally, and I was being stupid dumped-boy, but Spike's a vampire. And he has no soul. Who knows to what ends a guy like that goes when he feels rejected by the object of his obsession! And from the sound of it, we may be finding that out right about now."
"Well, it's too early to say what's going on but there definitely seems to be a Spike link." Tara said.
Xander frowned "You don't really know what's going on but you know for sure Spike's involved? What do you mean? He did the spell, then put his signature in the lower right corner?"
"Uhm, no..." Tara hesitated, "let's just say that if we hurry, we could still prevent her from buying a duster and start listening to the 'Sex Pistols greatest hits' ."
Before Xander could voice the 'huh' that was already apparent in his face, Anya cut in: "And grow a penis!"
They both looked at her. "What?" she shrugged and looked at Tara. "It's possible. I mean, from what you said.."
Tara thought about that and raised her eyebrows. "Not even...impossible I suppose...I mean, if it's still an ongoing process instead of something already finished..."
Xander looked back and for the between the two girls, and finally found a voice:
"WHAT????"
** **
Willow sat on the couch and looked at Buffy slouched down in her chair, her feet crossed and up on the table while sipping some bourbon from a bottle. She had been zapping along on the TV without finding much worth watching. Willow was just glad it was too late for "Passions".
Then suddenly, Buffy put the bottle down, stretched and got up. "Right. Think I'll go bust some vamp heads." Willow's eyes grew big and got up.
"No! No, I mean, we have to wait for Tara. Wouldn't you rather stay and have some more...uh, hard liquor or something?"
Buffy sighed and gave her a look. "Sorry Red, world doesn't stop for you getting all bent out of shape. I'm the Slayer."
'Oim the Slayuh'. Willow winced.
"Gotta patrol, keep the puppies and the girl scouts safe and all that. Can't be sittin' about."
She went to the hall and put her jacket on. Willow thought frantically.
"You're right!" she suddenly said.
Buffy turned to Willow with her head tilted a bit. "Really now."
"Yeah, something's wrong with me. Someone probably put a spell on me. You can't leave me alone! Who knows what I'll do! I could..."
Buffy shifted her weight, crossed her arms and raised one eyebrow as she looked at Willow less than convinced.
".....I could go all wonky and start magicking around the house! Anything could happen!"
Buffy smirked and pulled out her cigarettes. "Yeah, you could de- alfabetize all the CDs. Sorry luv, not buying. You just sit tight till Tara comes back and exorcises all your 'funniethoughts'. Got work t'do."
"But-but.." Willow stammered. Her only reply was the shutting door. She ran to it and opened it. "Buffy, wait!" She looked around but the street was empty. Damn! Did she jump back over the roof? Run really fast and jump the fence across the street? No way to tell.
She went back inside and crashed on the couch. "Well, that was useful...." Maybe it wouldn't be so bad though. She was still Buffy, and it was doubtful her ability to slay had lessened. If anything, Spike's traits would make her a meaner fighter. And she said she was just going to patrol, so she'd come back like always and hopefully they'd have something figured out by then.
"Yeah, something like that." she mumbled to herself. If nothing happened. If she didn't run into something worse than the usual vamp, something that needed slayer planning and not Spike's jumping-in-head-first-attitude.
And this was Sunnydale. Plenty of Big Bads to run into.
Willow looked up from her own thoughts. 'Running into Big Bad'.....
She felt herself pull a very awkward face.
"Uh oh...."
** ** TBC! Now R&R!
