The 99th Platoon – Escape from Batula's Castle


(A/N Heh, heh, heh. You by now have seen the part I was talking about. Ha, ha, ha…Just a note to the actual 'toon I can't remember who was the one who first did that whole scene in the bathroom but whoever it was, kudos to you! Resident Evil parodies up ahead.)

Chapter 4: …But be the serpent under 't

Chael froze.

His reflection grinned slowly, menacingly. He stared into the pink puffy eyes. They turned a blood red. A hand reached out of the mirror and wrapped itself around Chael's neck.

The table was more or less empty. A deep feeling of lethargy and a desire for idleness settled over the guests. A few bones, some crumbs and a wine spill were all that was left on the once clean table. The Count grinned. He could easily see that the drug was taking effect…they would soon pass out.

Chael gurgled. The hand was connected to an arm and the arm ended in a body. It was Chael. Chael was suffocating himself. He would laugh if it weren't happening to him.

The butler had laid a golden goblet in front of the Count. Squeaky was wondering, through a foggy mind, why a) the Count was going to start drinking now and b) what the Hell was in that wine?
It was only when he saw the shocked expression on everyone's faces that he knew he had spoken aloud.
"No Mr. Acore. Not in Hell."

He was forced up against the wall, right next to the mirror. Powerful fingers were tightening around his throat. He twisted and turned in mid air. His windpipe was being crushed. Suddenly Chael's arm jerked out violently. It landed on the mirror. A large crack formed in the corner. It suddenly wavered and released Chael.

"I honestly didn't vant it to come to zis." The Count rose from his chair. He seemed to float as he crossed the dining hall landing to the door. Mon, through his veil of drug-induced sleep, managed to slip Dark the carving knife. The butler could be seen unbuttoning his sleeves. He removed his black butler's jacket and handed it over to the Count. The Count hissed something, incomprehensible to a normal Squirrel, in the butler's ear.

Chael retaliated violently. He brought his knee to Its chin. It staggered backwards and crashed into the toilet seat. Suddenly It reared Its head back and roared with animal rage. Chael flinched.

The Count's ears suddenly twitched. He had heard something. So had Dark. The Count whispered to the butler.
"That fool. Deal with these ones and bring them back to my chamber." Then out loud he said, "Pray, accept my apologies." He was gone.
"What the ? Hey Butler! Wher- Why are the doors closing?!" yelled Mon.
It was so. One by one they were crashing shut. The BigWig's wife ran to the nearest one and tried to open it. They were locked in. All over the house doors were locking shut.

Chael punched It hard on the nose. The distinguishing *crack* of the fly bone entering the brain was heard. It fell to the ground. Chael turned to run from the room when he heard It stirring. Chael's eyes went wide.
"You're supposed to be dead!"
It grinned. It spoke for the first time with a voice like forks scratching ceramic plates.
"Not quite."
It lunged.

The BigWig's wife ran towards butler.
"You sir! What's wrong here? Sir? Oh my! Sir! Oh MY G-" she managed to scream before a much altered butler snapped her neck.
He had grown massive with broad shoulders and a thick neck. His fur had gone clear, almost see through but there was a large concentration of red around his eyes. His shirt was in tatters on the ground. Butler smiled revealing a set of glistening white fangs. His tail twitched eagerly.
"Dark?" asked Stealth.
"Yes," Dark replied. Stealth bit his lip. He had just seen his first vampire.

A sudden explosion of movement occurred!
Butler was fast. Faster than the eye could easily see or follow. Even in his groggy state of mind Sarge was in control. The Count had forgotten that Sarge and his boys had seen the hangovers of all hangovers. A little sleep potion wasn't going to stop them. Much.
"Get behind the table!" he barked. The soldier's sitting on the right flipped the table onto its side. The others dove for cover.

"Anyone got anything to use against…that?"
Pyst was glued to the wood. He scowled at Sarge.
"Someone told us to leave the weapons in the car…" he managed to pout before a pile driver fist smashed through the wood next to his head. Butler stared through the hole.
"Push!" Deja ordered. They shoved the table around Butler's neck. He jerked upwards, dragging the table with it.

Chael dodged to the left and It barrelled past, straight into the mirror. The mirror shattered into a million tiny, glittering shards. Chael stared at It in awe. It doubled over, moaning in pain as it slowly started disintegrating. Its hands fell apart into dust as cracks raced all over Its body. With one final look at Chael It exploded into little pieces.
Chael stared at the little glistening diamond-like shards that were everywhere around the room. He sat down on the toilet seat and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Distract it."
Dark was tying his laces. With a loud snap he pulled them tight. He clenched a fist around the carving knife.
"What do you mean distract it?" RedStorm asked. Dark growled menacingly.
 "Just make sure it's not looking at me!" he yelled as he dashed for a shady corner of the room. RedStorm looked dumbstruck.

"Err…Mr. Butler?" The monster raged around in fury, attempting to smash anything in sigh with its fists. RedStorm tried again.
"HEY ASSHOLE! OVER HERE!" The beast roared in fury as it swung around wildly looking for something to hit. With a final twist of its head it sent the table soaring into the BigWig, crushing him under it. Stealth ran to lift the table off the BigWig. The beast suddenly felt a soft thud.
RedStorm had broken a chair over its head. It turned slowly to look at Red. He gulped.

*tw-ING*

The carving knife was sunk deep into its back. It stopped instantly and fell to the ground breathing heavily. Dark stepped out from behind it to watch on with the others.
The Platoon stared in silence.
Disintegration began.

"They are highly allergic to silver and garlic," Dark explained.
They nodded accepting the fact.
"Forget all that stuff about crucifixes and holy water. Granted: strong religious belief can perhaps slightly deter them but not for long enough."
It started at its feet. It was as if it was falling apart layer by layer. First it shed its skin, revealing muscle and tissue.
"Stake through the heart works too. We should get out of here as fast as possible. They are fast, ruthless and very dangerous."
Then it was stripped of muscles leaving pearly-white bone.
"Is it dead?" Cherry asked. Dark shook his head.
"Only when it has fully disintegrated."
The skull turned to look at the Platoon. Now the bones were turning to dust. It knew the end was near. Somehow it managed to speak for one last time.
"You're all going to die down here…"
And he was gone.
"Resident Evil – eat your heart out," Pyst whispered.

A loud bang was heard against the door. The Platoon was still staring at the spot where it had lay. Chael suddenly burst through the door as he kicked it off its hinges.

"What the hell happened to you?" Sarge asked. Chael looked around the room.

Sarge stood at the front talking with Chael. Deja and Pyst hung back behind him. Mon stood tending to the BigWig's injuries.
Oreos checked the other B.W. He shook his head. Dark slid the carving knife into his pocket.
They would need it.
FlatFeet held Cherry's hand gently; her body's trembling was visible. CoolGuy and RedStorm were staring at the spot were the vampire had dissolved. Squeaky and ILZ were putting the door back in place. Stealth was looking for anything useful, he needed a weapon!

Sarge stood in front of the tired group of soldiers. He rubbed his chin.

"I don't know what we're up against. I know that we have been fooled into coming into this death trap. I don't know how the hell we're gonna defend ourselves. I do know that we will be meeting the Count again. I don't know if we're gonna make it out alive. Any questions?"

*mmmm…*

"Oh shit." Pyst ran to close the door. Everyone stared at him. He closed it and piled up some debris against it.
"Come on! There's not much time!"
"Till what?" Oreos asked
"HAVEN'T YOU EVER SEEN RESIDENT EVIL!?!"
"Yeah but, relax, that was just a film," Squeaky sighed.
"We have to get the doors closed!"
"Why?!" Chael asked.
"Answer the question soldier!" Sarge barked. Pyst looked at Dark. Dark nodded.
"They need to know what they are going to see."

"They are the UnDead. Zombies. Completely without a will of their own, they are the worst of all plagues. One scratch will leave you infected. You get one - one and a half days tops. They are driven by only the most basic of desires."
"What?" Cherry asked.
"Hunger."

All four doors in the room flew open simultaneously. Pyst stared around the room.
"Hey!"
Laughter filled the air. Not the happy kind. Evil emanated from it.
Pyst tried to close them but it was if an invisible force prevented this. He staggered back to the centre of the room where everyone had converged. They were breathing heavily.

Deja flipped out her boot knife. She ripped a piece of cloth from the fallen tablecloth and tied her hair up with it. Save for Deja and Dark and his knife the Platoon was fighting unarmed. They stood back-to-back.
RedStorm grabbed his staff from where it had been stored in the corner. He clasped the middle and twisted it.

*s-SWUNG*

Three steel blades shot out of the slits at both ends of the staff, six in all. RedStorm flipped the, much deadlier, staff through the air. The staff sung out its dull, mellow song as it sliced the air around him.
Dark raised an eyebrow.
"Nice trick," he muttered.

*trr-ingle-ingle*
*thump*

"What's that?" someone asked in a hushed whisper.
"Something is walking down that corridor…"